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How do you relax when there is always something that needs to be done?


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I feel like I have been in a perpetual state of 'on duty' for 6 years now. Like I can't sit down and relax because someone always needs me. I have 3 boys, 6, 3 1/2, and 1 1/2. If I am lucky, I have about 2 hours a day with all 3 kids asleep. Even then, I look around and have soooooo much that needs to be done. I find it very hard to truly tune out the to-do list. And my kids have been such poor sleepers that I feel 'on call' all night long as well.

 

I need to figure out either how to get everything done with time to spare (ha-ha-ha-ha....), or how to keep going without ever getting some real down-time, or how to relax in spite of it all.

 

My dear husband is pretty good about watching the kids on occasion while I go out for a girls' night (which I love!) or letting me run errands alone (ditto!), but what I really crave (as an introvert) is time at home by myself. But that is where the dishes, laundry, and bills are.

 

Maybe just waiting it out for another couple years will be the solution. It will be so nice when all of the boys can wipe themselves, refrain from experimenting with the cooking spray all over my kitchen floor and cabinets (yes, that happened today...), and read quietly in bed (one down, two to go...).

 

Honestly, life is good. Really good. I'd just like to sit down for a movie and for once watch it beginning to end without using the pause button 3,467 times. :)

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Heidi,

 

I know what you mean. Mine were not good sleepers or nappers. It was really really hard sometimes. It does get better in that respect. Mine are 6 and 9 (soon to be 10 ack!). They do so much for themselves now and for me too. I have also greatly relaxed my expectations and standards. My house is decent but not in show case order by any means. And I really don't care about that anymore. But that's me. It isn't all that important to me. You will feel obligated to do what is important to you. Now, I take the evenings off for me, not the house. Sure, things need to be done, but I need my time more.

I hope you can find a way to find your time. It is vital for your well-being and for your children to see that your time is valuable too!

 

(((heidi)))

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I feel like I have been in a perpetual state of 'on duty' for 6 years now. Like I can't sit down and relax because someone always needs me. I have 3 boys, 6, 3 1/2, and 1 1/2. If I am lucky, I have about 2 hours a day with all 3 kids asleep. Even then, I look around and have soooooo much that needs to be done. I find it very hard to truly tune out the to-do list. And my kids have been such poor sleepers that I feel 'on call' all night long as well.

 

I need to figure out either how to get everything done with time to spare (ha-ha-ha-ha....), or how to keep going without ever getting some real down-time, or how to relax in spite of it all.

 

My dear husband is pretty good about watching the kids on occasion while I go out for a girls' night (which I love!) or letting me run errands alone (ditto!), but what I really crave (as an introvert) is time at home by myself. But that is where the dishes, laundry, and bills are.

 

Maybe just waiting it out for another couple years will be the solution. It will be so nice when all of the boys can wipe themselves, refrain from experimenting with the cooking spray all over my kitchen floor and cabinets (yes, that happened today...), and read quietly in bed (one down, two to go...).

 

Honestly, life is good. Really good. I'd just like to sit down for a movie and for once watch it beginning to end without using the pause button 3,467 times. :)

 

My dh instituted family time. At 8:00, I am done. I would keep working straight up until bedtime and he really wanted me to just stop and be with them. We read, or play a game, in the summer we play football, we tried to learn how to juggle, etc. Right now it is mostly just read. It was really hard the first few weeks.

 

But you know what? The house hasn't fallen apart. Our lives haven't fallen apart. And no one has gone naked because they didn't have clean clothes. I've compensated for that hour or so of time somehow.

 

I know what you mean about wanting the house to yourself. I get it for about 2-3 hours a day, but it's between 5 & 7 or 8 in the morning. Even then I'm working, but I'm also thinking. Uninterrupted. Ahh...bliss :D.

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I blow off the housework and relax!:D Honestly, I clean up and the kids mess up in a continual cycle. Once a week it gets picked up thoroughly. I bushwhack a quick trail through the toys each evening and call it good. My oldest is obsessive about leaving some of his toy animals in strange places (in front of the front door, on the kitchen counter, right in front of the tv). It's not worth the tantrum to put these away. Maintain your sanity first and your house second.;)

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Thanks, Melissa!

 

I do think things will get easier in many respects in a few years. My 3 yo 'helper' child will actually be able to do some of the things he attempts to do now (like cook, heaven help me). My 1 yo is already fiercely independent. Which isn't so pleasant at 1, but hopefully will pay off by 5, LOL.

 

My house is pretty messy (and dirty) most of the time. I might start cleaning up once a day instead of all day long. :) I'll invest in some blinders for those times I just want to sit and breathe!

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I appreciate it, Julianna! Sanity is more important in the long run. If only I could explain that to the utility companies, LOL. I was exhausted and didn't get around to paying bills today. :)

 

Really, though, I find that I waste time wandering around the house trying to feel like I am accomplishing things, when I would get more done if I dug in for a half hour and then sat down and read for the rest of the hour.

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I am going to have to figure out how to get the basics done by 8. I'm doing dishes and bed stuff for the kids until at least 9. Maybe I need to start delegating to hubby a little more! I would love to have more family time. I wish I could do early mornings, but my sleep is more important to my sanity than down-time.

 

Thanks for the advice!

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If you are lucky enough to get them all down to sleep at a reasonable hour, forget the housework! Guaranteed it will still be there tomorrow, so go ahead and relax while you can.

 

I also feel pressured by housework, but I only have one child, so there is really no excuse for me other than my own laziness! But I would definitely cut you some slack. You deserve to relax!

Michelle T

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And while I do have older helpers, I always think back to the wise homeschooling mom who once told me in response to me saying that I never feel like my head is quite above water, "Let it go. It never will be above water and there will always be something to do."

 

There are nine of us living in this house, and for the past fifteen years there has always been a toddler who drags things from room to room. Currently I cannot find my pie server or my kitchen sheers...

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Thank you, Kendra and Michelle. I've just got to do some deep breathing techniques. :) Someone told me that Lamaze breathing isn't for labor, it is for surviving the childhood to come. I think I flunked Lamaze.

 

It is hard for me to let things go!! I need to be able to enjoy myself in the midst of chaos. My husband has no problems doing so, LOL, but he is a big part of the chaos (usually in a good way...).

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Well, I have no advice for you, because I'm in the exact same spot. I only have two kids, but I work from home 30 hours a week, so that takes up any extra time I might have (like, say, right now, when I should be working?). The wise mamas here keep telling me it will get easier as the years, and I'm clinging to that for my life, LOL! You're not alone, though, if that makes you feel any better ;)

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"Clinging to that for my life." Yep. I hear ya! I am so very awed by the mothers of many... It is probably nice to have a few helpers as the kiddos get older, but it is that 'littles' stage that's overwhelming. I could have 4 or 6 kids under 6. Ack!

 

You are doing a great job, yourself, if you are keeping your head above water while working from home. I'm proud of you!

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So much of this journey is about dying to self. People always say to me, "Wow-- seven kids. You must be really patient." I assure them that I did not start out that way (heck, I was a self-focused 22yo when we had our first child), but that with more children my patience has grown. Things that used to undo me are things I laugh at now.

 

I like order. I like decor. I like to at least try to look stylish. But some of that has had to go over the years and I can say I am a better person inside because of it. I got to thinking tonight at how delighted my kids are by the simplest things, and all those grandiose, over-the-top ideas and plans that ultimately would make me stress out and lose my cool with the kids as I mowed them down on my quest for perfection, are not necessary. Those things are about me, not them.

 

Last week I took a chocolate baking course at a very fine restaurant highly rated in magazines like Conde Nast. There were just three of us in the class, and one of the other women kept apologizing to me when she bumped me or was in my way, etc. I finally just smiled at her and said, "You know what? I'm a mother of seven, and I never cook anymore without someone at my feet. There's not a thing you could do to irritate me in the kitchen, so no need to apologize". What good would it be if I could execute a perfect chocolate souffle with creme anglaise, but could not speak with kindness to my neighbor?

 

I think that's where you need to recognize "the line". Is your quest for having everything done or done a certain way getting in the way of fruitful relationships with your children and husband? If not, then you simply need to find a better way for this season of your life. If so, then maybe you could ask your husband or a close friend to help you recognize and evaluate what the most important accomplishments at home are for you, right now.

 

Seasons come and go, so it won't always be like this. Someday my home will be decorated the way I picture it, and when I arrange candles on the table, there won't be any little hands re-arranging them for me. I'll have time to prepare elaborate meals that will bless others, but for now, raising these young people to love God and each other takes a front seat to everything else.

 

HTH,

Kendra

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With four boys here I know what you mean... only I have no problem ignoring my to do list in order to relax. I realize that if I wait until my lists are all crossed off to ever sit down and relax, I will never ever sit down and relax... and I'm just not willing to be a martyr for any cause that will be undone within 15 minutes of doing it! LOL Don't get me wrong... I get around to doing it all... but I'm sure it doesn't meet up with many people's specifications half of the time. Oh well... I don't have to worry about them because they don't live here. :p

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My eldest is 11 and my youngest is almost 8. I just started getting some alone time on Friday nights (chess night at the local chess club for dad & boys!). I have been enjoying this luxury for almost a year now and I'm sooooo thankful! It was a long wait to have these moments!

 

Up until that time, I was just in a perpetual state of crazy! :eek:

 

All I can do is say that I feel your pain. Hang in there!

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It's hard, I know, to be "on call" more often than not. You probably know that I stay up very, very late. I've always been a night owl but even moreso now because when the only time I don't feel "on" is when others are soundly sleeping. And I'm fortunate in that my boys have, for the most part, been good night sleepers. (On the other hand, I can't imagine having two hours a day with three guys sleeping, including a 6 year old!) So that's my primary down time ~ at night. I also find when I read aloud to my boys, in the afternoons, to be a time of relaxation.

 

Beyond that, I wouldn't really feel comfortable just relaxing in the middle of the day. When there are things I feel should be done, I can't relax, simply sit on the couch reading a book or taking a nap in the afternoon. I might sit down and chat here a bit, then hang some laundry, then read an email, then sit and pay some bills...Sort of mixing business and pleasure, in other words. I also don't function well when there's chaos around me. I don't go in for letting kids wreak havoc and then cleaning it up once a day. Cleaning up (and your older two can do this) as they go is key here and prevents that chaotic feeling. (Which is not to say all looks lovely ~ nope!)

 

Toward the end of the day, I try to get any loose ends tied up so I can feel more relaxed once the boys are in bed. (And while I wait for Kai to come downstairs once or twice...it can take him quite while to really get to sleep. The other day I was sitting in the front living room, immersed in watching Bleak House, a good two hours after the boys had gone to bed. All of I sudden I heard this little voice behind me: "Peek-a-boo!". I swear I nearly jumped out of my skin!) If Hans isn't working in the barn, he helps with the post-dinner routine. You mentioned still washing dishes and getting kids to bed at 9 pm, but of course you shouldn't be the only one doing those things. Maybe, as you said, you should ask your husband to help out more and delegate to him.

 

As far as wanting time alone at home, I am right with you on that. More than anything else, that's what I crave. I have a few projects right now that I just can't do in bits and pieces while everyone else is around. The only way I'm going to get to these things is if Hans would go away ~ for more than just a few hours ~ with the boys. He's done that in the past, but right now there are no plans for that on the horizon. So, I try my darndest not to think about the projects. C'est la vie.

 

Hugs to you, (((Heidi))).

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Heidi,

 

Your kids are at ages that are tough for having mommy alone time. When your kids are older, life *will* get simpler! I agree with others who have suggested you delegate more to your dh. Then, as the kids get older, take the time to train them to do household chores. If you are the perfectionist type, restrain yourself from redoing the work! :)

 

Once my kids were 6 or 7, they were making their own beds, helping clear the table, and unloading part of the dishwasher. They were also feeding the animals and of course cleaning up their toys. One thing that really helped is that I have always tried to instigate the "clean up one toy before you get out another" policy, and for the most part it has worked. No legos laying everywhere with no one playing with them--when the play is over, the toys get dumped back in the bin. Sometimes my son will have a particularly difficult lego project going on, and he can leave his half-built creation on his dresser, but the little pieces yet to be affixed get put away. The only thing that gets left out are jigsaw puzzles, because once you get those 1,000 pieces sorted by color or design, it would be pointless to scoop them all up and put them away! But we keep puzzles-in-progress in a corner on the floor or on a table.

 

Now that my kids are 10, they clear the dishes from the table, clean up the kitchen, load (and empty) the dishwasher, and take out the trash. They vacuum & dust their bedrooms while I do mine. They clean their bathroom while I clean mine. We all pitch in together cleaning the main living areas. They help my dh with yardwork, and put their own laundry away. Now that they are getting tall enough to reach our stackable dryer, they will begin learning how to do the laundry, but since there are only 4 of us I'll probably keep doing it for them. They feed the dog and pick up poop.

 

My dh does all yard work (with the kids if he needs them) and does almost all the cooking. I do all errands/shopping/schooling/laundry etc., and cook when my dh is not around (he travels frequently). My dd is starting to cook also, and makes oatmeal, eggs, and other easy one-pot things. Although it seems far off, your kids will be able to help soon, and your time at these tasks will diminish.

 

By the time dinner is over and the kids have cleaned up, it is relaxing time for the whole family. This gives us several hours to enjoy whether we are doing something all together or off doing our own thing. Also, both kids are in bed by 9ish, so I still have another hour or 2 of peace before I go to bed.

 

Hang in there, Heidi! {{hug}} It gets easier with time.

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I have to admit I restrain myself from telling moms of little people that life will be easier when their children are older. I see it as a trade-off. Less physical energy expended, but more emotional energy invested, the older they get. And once they reach an age when truly being involved in the world around them matters, you have different roles to fill.

 

My dh does all yard work (with the kids if he needs them) and does almost all the cooking.

 

I hope you don't mind my asking this...If your husband does the cooking and your kids clean the kitchen and take care of the dishes, do you have a job at meal times? It sounds like you have a nice pattern of working together cooperatively as a family.

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I have to admit I restrain myself from telling moms of little people that life will be easier when their children are older. I see it as a trade-off. Less physical energy expended, but more emotional energy invested, the older they get. And once they reach an age when truly being involved in the world around them matters, you have different roles to fill.

 

You know, after I posted I started thinking about this, too. Right now both my kids are just beginning to get hormonal, and I can tell that the next few years will be emotionally tiring and draining. My sister has seen 3 kids through their teen years, and I want to talk to her and get her advice, mostly on how to control my own hurt (or exasperated) feelings. My dd is happy one minute and sad or upset or irritated the next. Oy vey, I can't believe it's all starting!

 

I hope you don't mind my asking this...If your husband does the cooking and your kids clean the kitchen and take care of the dishes, do you have a job at meal times? It sounds like you have a nice pattern of working together cooperatively as a family.

 

No, I don't mind. My dh enjoys cooking as a way to unwind after work, so normally I will sip a glass of wine (so will he) and we'll talk about our day as he prepares dinner. I'll help if I can, but he's quick and very good, so he'd really rather do it himself. But he typically travels either 2-3 days a week or else overseas for 10-14 days at a time, so I cook during those times.

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No, I don't mind. My dh enjoys cooking as a way to unwind after work, so normally I will sip a glass of wine (so will he) and we'll talk about our day as he prepares dinner. I'll help if I can, but he's quick and very good, so he'd really rather do it himself. But he typically travels either 2-3 days a week or else overseas for 10-14 days at a time, so I cook during those times.

 

How did you break my quote up into 2 sections? Part of my answer to you ended up in the shaded quote box, and the other in the normal "answer" part of the post. Is it the "mini quote" button?

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How did you break my quote up into 2 sections? Part of my answer to you ended up in the shaded quote box, and the other in the normal "answer" part of the post. Is it the "mini quote" button?

 

What happens when you push the "Quote" button is that you will see words in [ ]'s that end with

at the end. Anything that is in between those []...[/] parts will be in the quote box. Anything after or before will be in the white part.

 

You put some of your quote between her words, and that ended up in the box. The last of your comments came after the [/Quote], so that was not in the "answer" part.

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What happens when you push the "Quote" button is that you will see words in [ ]'s that end with
at the end. Anything that is in between those []...[/] parts will be in the quote box. Anything after or before will be in the white part.

 

You put some of your quote between her words, and that ended up in the box. The last of your comments came after the [/Quote], so that was not in the "answer" part.

 

So, I've seen answers with part of a quote above, and then the current poster writes an answer, and then below that there is another part of the quote, and then another answer. Is this done by just typing the

myself, in order to break up the original post I am answering into pieces? Clear as mud? :o
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So, I've seen answers with part of a quote above, and then the current poster writes an answer, and then below that there is another part of the quote, and then another answer. Is this done by just typing the

myself, in order to break up the original post I am answering into pieces? Clear as mud? :o

 

Ok, sorta. :D See, this stuff comes in pairs. So long as you have a [] with the word "QUOTE" in the [], and at the end you have a

that will end the quote, you can do it. You just have to keep track of the pairs.

 

For example, I couldn't say

to describe the first part of this explanation, because when I posted that you need a pair of []'s and a / with the word QUOTE inside the []'s, I would have made a pair, and everything inside the pair would show up inside a gray box and the explanation would be hidden and lost.

 

LOL

 

Just reply if you don't get it still.

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Wow, thanks so much everyone! I really do appreciate the sympathy and advice.

 

A couple things:

 

I try hard to not romanticize the idea of life with a little bit older kids, LOL. There are trade-offs, I'm sure. I've thought about the amount of effort I will be putting into schooling (much more than the current K/1st grade stuff). I'm trying not to think about the boy hormonal stuff. Ack! And my 3 year old is so insanely cute~ it makes up for the cooking spray that is still coating my kitchen. I know that I am going to really miss my little guys!!

 

Also, Colleen, the two hours are at night. :) My littlest guy takes a nap, but that is when we do schooling. It is impossible to get much accomplished (without being constantly distracted) with both the 3yo and the 1yo around. So, my problem is that I'm trying to get my night routine done after they go to bed. I have made it a point to get some reading in then also, which has been wonderful! I guess that will count as my relaxation for the day.

 

I also love reading to the kids. Occasionally that is relaxing. The 1yo has started making little screaming sounds when I read aloud, though. It is driving me insane! He gets put in his crib, but I don't want read-aloud time to be associated with punishment or to be a struggle like that. Sometimes I do it in the evening after he goes to bed, but that is part of my two hours....

 

Probably the biggest problem is feeling okay about relaxing when it comes time to do something in the evening or on the weekend. It is more the longer periods of time that I have trouble with (like movies). I feel like I have to get up every 15 minutes and DO something. Even going out to dinner with my dh without the kids. I constantly feel on-edge, wondering whose food I should be cutting, LOL. I suppose we just need a bunch more practice at going out alone. Yes, that sounds like a GREAT idea!

 

Thank you, thank you, everyone!

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I'm a total introvert too, and love the time alone in my own home. My husband is super supportive but not an introvert. I've found he's willing to give me that time...but I have to ask for it very specifically. I have two little guys too...4 and 15 months.

 

For me taking a bath works great. Sometimes I'll get dinner ready and then when he gets home he's on duty and I go upstairs for a warm bath and a book. I felt guilty the first few times but then I realized it's really only an hour at the most and it leaves me feeling so much more relaxed it's good for everyone. I'm still there to help with dinner cleanup and bedtime routine.

 

Another time I've found is on weekends he'll take them out to play or for a walk around the block or to the park for an hour or two and I get to have that time in the house. I purposely will not let myself clean then. :) It's only for reading, sewing, playing on the computer or whatever else is fun for me.

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I blow off the housework and relax!:D Honestly, I clean up and the kids mess up in a continual cycle. Once a week it gets picked up thoroughly. I bushwhack a quick trail through the toys each evening and call it good. My oldest is obsessive about leaving some of his toy animals in strange places (in front of the front door, on the kitchen counter, right in front of the tv). It's not worth the tantrum to put these away. Maintain your sanity first and your house second.;)

 

 

Yep! During the week, as long as we have clean dishes and bath towels, and there's nothing hazardous on the floor, it stays untidy until Friday, when I do a real cleaning. I need my evenings to be quiet and relaxing. As long as it's in my head that things'll be cleaned up on a certain day, I can kick back and play Animal Crossing for a bit in the evening. :D

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Hey Heidi!

 

First ((( ))) a hug, cause you're a great mom. :) I certainly know how three little ones all with needs or just MOVING constantly sort of leaves one on edge once they're in bed. I can't imagine how you survive when your guys just don't sleep well either. I wish I had brilliant advice. When all three of mine were under 4, then under 5, I just HAD to squeeze in short breaks. Dh worked from home then and at rest time I would run to the bank or the library, something ALONE and quick. :) It helped. I'm really strict about rest time for everyone. I know you school then with Levi, but...if the little one naps then, could the big two just do a book on tape (school related), so you can have a few minutes. I know I need that short break.

 

For us it's only been in the past year that things have calmed down considerably now that Sophie is almost 4. :( The kids play together *mostly* nicely and I can do a few things then, less productive things than I should do, but that's another issue. ;) And now that things are calm, well, we're sort of thinking a 4th might be a nice idea. LOL.

 

Jami

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LOL, Jami. I think about a 4th only in short moments of insanity. :) I think things will be considerably easier in just 2 or 3 years (and before the hormone stuff gets started!).

 

It is amazing how differently I feel after just a half hour running errands alone. I come home wanting to love on the kids. :)

 

Do you relax easily when you have longer stretches of time? If you go out without the kids, are you constantly looking around wondering what is needed of you? Can you sustain a relaxing activity at home without 'doing' something every 15 minutes? That's what is toughest for me right now!

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Well, when dh and I go out it depends on who's watching the kids. If it's a newer babysitter and we have to be home at a certain time to drive her home, then I tend to not relax as much. But if it's my parents or his and they're going to put the kids to bed, then yes, I can definitely relax and stay out till the wee hours with pleasure. :) But I don't have a baby or even a toddler right now. Once we're out sometimes we sort of struggle with non-child centered conversation, but we warm up after a bit.

 

I've been away a couple of times in the past 2 months sans children. Once I met a girlfriend halfway between our homes and we spent a WONDERFUL 24 hours talking and hanging out. I called home a few times, but the kids were with Dad, he does fine with them, so I had no trouble relaxing and enjoying my time. And then I went to an overnight women's retreat for church and that was very nice also. But again, it might be that I have a little bit older kids now. If I still had an infant or toddler I might have felt more anxious.

 

During the day, hmm, yes I think I can relax for 15 min. or so at a stretch pretty well. I'm not really a "have to be doing stuff" personality anyway and I'm definitely not a particularly great housekeeper. ;) I try and keep my room or the living room pretty tidy so that it feels more peaceful to be in and I'm not distracted by the messes in the rest of the house. I just avoid the kids rooms if I'm feeling edgy about messes. Can you escape to your bedroom and have a few moments free of the toys and kid messes? If your room is that way, mine is a bit covered in laundry waiting to be put away so if I tried to relax in there I'd be thinking about the clothes I'm not folding. But then I'd probably just do a mental shrug and ignore it. I don't necessarily need quiet or clean space (though I like both of those things very much) as I need new ideas, conversations, stimuli in my days. I guess that makes me more extroverted. I find that books, emails, message boards, phone calls, a few outings to meet up with friends (with kids) seems to relax me as much as anything. I do know what you mean about enjoying being home *alone*, I love that. While I'm not particularly introverted, I do hate to be crowded. LOL. And our current home is a little more crowded than I would prefer. I guess I'm an extravert who likes her space, which is why online communities are so DANGEROUS for me! :D

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Even going out to dinner with my dh without the kids. I constantly feel on-edge, wondering whose food I should be cutting, LOL. I suppose we just need a bunch more practice at going out alone.

 

LOL I can totally relate on this. Takes me about 30-40 minutes to come off the "kid edge" when going out alone. It's better now as my kids are getting older but still... :o

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'An extravert who likes her space.' :) That makes sense to me. I am an introvert who craves interaction with others on my own terms, LOL. Again, makes online communites dangerous. Between blogging and my bookclub (love. love. love.) I get most of that fulfilled, luckily. I'm actually not 'here' as often as I used to be.

 

It REALLY helps that I can keep my living room picked up and fairly clean (and decorated). That is my sanity place. The rest of the house, well... Not the best house keeper here either!

 

I enjoy going out with my hubby on rare occasion. We need to work much harder on getting away more often this year now that I'm not nursing anymore. We are so out of practice that it is a struggle to get out of the 'talking about the kids' mode. I think dates are going straight to the priority list! The hard part for me has been finding a babysitter. Apparently there aren't any it town, at least none that I can find! The few friends I have with children use grandparents. None have babysitters other than that! My mom's health isn't so great right now, and it is tough for her to do all 3 boys. :) I need to send them home with my kid-less sister more often!

 

It's been nice 'chatting' with you, Jami! Have a great weekend. :)

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Ok, sorta. :D See, this stuff comes in pairs. So long as you have a [] with the word "QUOTE" in the [], and at the end you have a
that will end the quote, you can do it. You just have to keep track of the pairs.

 

Did that work?

 

For example, I couldn't say
to describe the first part of this explanation, because when I posted that you need a pair of []'s and a / with the word QUOTE inside the []'s, I would have made a pair, and everything inside the pair would show up inside a gray box and the explanation would be hidden and lost.

 

LOL

 

Just reply if you don't get it still.

 

I'll find out!

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