SquirrellyMama Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 We haven't had this situation, but I want to be prepared. The answer might depend on the state. I'm in Iowa. What if my kid gets a call from a friend who is drunk at a party, and wants my kid to come pick them up. What do they do? Do they wake me up, and say can we go pick this kid up? Can they go themselves without getting in trouble? Call the kid's parents to get their own kid? Do we get the friend then call the cops on the party? Call the cops first? Not call the cops at all? We may never have this situation, but I would like to know what the right answer is. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amyx4 Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 If your teen has a friend that calls and asks for a ride then your teen (and perhaps you) go pickup party-teen and make sure that party-teen gets to their home or your home safe. No questions asked and no lectures in the middle of the night. However, my suggestion sounds great on a message board. When in reality, the raising of teens is never that simple. 17 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 I would not have a teen pick up a drunk teen. Legally I think it would be fine. But a drunk person can be unpredictable and difficult to handle - not something I want left to a teen especially if they are an inexperienced driver. I would go myself to pick them up. 25 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HomeAgain Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 Go with your gut. What needs to happen right then? What is your goal right then? Our policy was Amyx4's. No questions. Pick up kid, make sure they're safe. If they're calling my kid for a ride, I need to know because my kid's leaving the house in the middle of the night. I may or may not go with/drive. Because I'm that sort of parent. And the next day, if kid was at my house, I'd probably follow up with his/her parents (but depends on the kid and whether it's a one time thing), because I'm that sort of parent, too. But my goal is always get kid out of danger first, deal with the rest after sleep and with a cool head. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawana Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 In my state, Georgia, 16 and 17 yos have a driving curfew from midnight to 5am, no exceptions. So that would preclude picking up a drunk friend between those hours. Ds got a call once from a drunk friend, and declined to drive. I only knew about it much after the fact, so wasn’t involved in the decision. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 Depends on my teenager and the friend. For a younger less mature teen and/or new driver? I would pick up the teen myself, possibly taking my son with me. For an older or more mature teen (ie: 18+) who is a competent driver and the friend in question was someone who is not toxic? I’d thank them for being a good friend and let them go alone. If the person seeking a ride had a troubling history, that would affect my ability to risk picking them up. I would follow up with the parents to the degree it was practical to do so. Some people don’t have parents who I can follow up with. My niece and son know they can be picked up anytime/anywhere. Only my niece has had to use that. Occasionally I have extricated one or more of her friends at the same time. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ailaena Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 Btdt, picked up kid, dd drove her home and I drove kid’s car. Happened twice with kids under 18, a few times with people 18-20-something. Not sure how I would handle repetitive times with the same teen, but I would certainly have to say something during daylight hours. Dd has called me multiple times regarding drugs and alcohol and her friends and I always encourage it and thank her for caring for her friends. Ymmv. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanaqui Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 Pick them up, give them a bottle of water, take them home UNLESS one of two situations apply: 1. Home is not safe. In this case, take them to your home or to the safe adults of their choice. (Use your best judgment here.) 2. It's apparent that they need to go to the hospital or police because they're that sick or they've been hurt in some way. In this case, use your best judgment. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted June 4, 2018 Author Share Posted June 4, 2018 Is there any way the kid or parent/kid picking up the drunk teen from a party would get in legal trouble. That is what I'm trying to navigate ahead of time. I want my kid and me to be there if needed, but I don't want my kid to get in trouble. I couldn't find anything online about the legalities of it all. I would prefer not to get anyone in trouble with the police. I also don't want anyone to die driving drunk. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 It seems beyond obvious to me that the right thing is to make sure they get a safe ride home or to your home or another safe place. If your teen could provide that, great. If not, I'd make sure I'd do it. I can't quite imagine this situation. But none of the teens here seem to drive and they all have Lyft/Uber on their phones. This is probably pretty geographically dependant in that sense. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted June 4, 2018 Author Share Posted June 4, 2018 1 minute ago, Farrar said: It seems beyond obvious to me that the right thing is to make sure they get a safe ride home or to your home or another safe place. If your teen could provide that, great. If not, I'd make sure I'd do it. I can't quite imagine this situation. But none of the teens here seem to drive and they all have Lyft/Uber on their phones. This is probably pretty geographically dependant in that sense. Yes, I agree that it is obvious to get the kid home safely. I just want to make sure my kid doesn't get in trouble for going to the party to get the friend. And, if I know about the party am I legally obligated to make sure the police know. Just curious. Lyft and Uber aren't that big around here. Kelly 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 https://alcoholpolicy.niaaa.nih.gov/underage-drinking/state-profiles/iowa/67 As far as the law goes, as long as you are not furnishing the alcohol and as long as you are not letting them drive, I don't see any legal problem with transporting them to a safe place - like their home. If the teen is under 16, I would want the parent to know. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 I'm confused as to what kind of trouble you think your teen could get into? Many states do have time restrictions for new teen drivers. Here there's a curfew from 9:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. for drivers who get their licenses at 16 (I think those hours are right, if not they're very close). After six months of driving with the time restriction in place the teen can go to the DMV and have the restriction removed. Other than some restriction like that it seems to me the teen would be just like any other designated driver. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Annie G Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 1 minute ago, Arctic Mama said: No, I’ve never heard of a designated driver getting into trouble, even if someone is having serious side effects. It falls under Good Samaritan clauses as far as I understand it. That’s what I assume. However, if after I or a teen dropped the person at home the person choked on vomit or had a medical emergency due to drugs (opioids can be pretty dangerous), I would feel awful that I hadn’t informed the parents to watch their kid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SquirrellyMama Posted June 4, 2018 Author Share Posted June 4, 2018 1 minute ago, Pawz4me said: I'm confused as to what kind of trouble you think your teen could get into? Many states do have time restrictions for new teen drivers. Here there's a curfew for drivers who get their licenses at 16 from 9:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. (I think those are right, if not they're very close) for the first six months of driving. After that they can go to the DMV and have the restriction removed. Other than some restriction like that it seems to me the teen would be just like any other designated driver. I guess my concern is if my teen goes to the party to pick up the friend, and the police come while my teen is there... What will happen? I should have added that police part. Sorry, I often know what I'm trying to say in my head. Or, if I go along to get the kid, and the police come; am I in trouble for not reporting what I knew ahead of time? My dad's answer to all of this when I was a kid was, "If you are at a party and not drinking, and the police come you will be in as much trouble as the drinkers." I'm sure it was his way of keeping me away from parties, and it worked. Even in college I was very careful not to attend parties where alcohol was served until I was 21. My daughter's Biology teacher told them a story about himself, and losing a full ride scholarship due to being at a party that was raided. He wasn't drinking. Kelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pawz4me Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 1 minute ago, SquirrellyMama said: Sorry, I often know what I'm trying to say in my head. LOL! I so understand . . . 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
livetoread Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 My underage niece was at a party where kids were drinking and the police were called. The police called my sister and told her to come get her, but assured her that her daughter blew zero and wasn’t in trouble. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joker Posted June 4, 2018 Share Posted June 4, 2018 I remember a few years ago reading about a teen who was punished for picking up a drunk friend, but it was by her school and not the police who also showed up at the party. I would probably go with my dc just to make sure everything was OK. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gardenmom5 Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 in that situation - I'd hope they woke me up. I think a responsible, and more experienced, adult in that situation would be better able to handle unexpected things - like other kids trying to get them to stay, or the sober friend to stay and drink too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
umsami Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 I'd probably want my kid to wake me up, just to be safe. I wonder if a family Uber account might be a good way to handle this, as well. Although I worry about an Uber driver taking advantage of a drunk teen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 No way I'd let my kid drive a drunk teen home. Too much can happen. I'd go, and take my teen with me. And I'd be waking up those parents, too. (Actually, I'd make dh go since I don't drive at night.) I've had too many trips to the emergency room with an incapacitated teen who called me. I wouldn't bring someone else's kid to my place, ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ccolopy Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 At 16/17, or if the situation seems sketchy at any age, I would want my teen to wake my husband (not me!) to go with him to pick up the friend. I would not call the other teen's parents unless they were in medical distress or my teen couldn't find them or something, and would not call the police unless the party seemed especially unsafe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 When my nephew was 18 his 18 year old drunk friend was behaving so erratically in the car, as a passenger that my nephew put him out of the vehicle. The friend then jumped in the middle of the road and was hit and killed by another vehicle. Drunks are not reasonable. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PinkyandtheBrains. Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 1 minute ago, happysmileylady said: If somehow my kid ended up in that sort of situation, I would want my kid to wake me up and I would drive. And wake up drunk friends parent. But, I often wonder in these types of threads...who are these people? This is not a put down on the OP or anyone else, more a question on internet vs real life. I literally never attended a party...or even KNEW of a party where underage drinking happened. At 16, a “party” for my friends and I was: we meet at Don Pablo’s, have dinner, then go to X friends house and watch rented videos till 3am. My sister was a smidge more “worldly” I guess and she hosted a “party “ for her friends (like 6 to 10 people) where underage drinking happened. But...she was 18 and in her own apartment. It was her “housewarming” party. She moved out the summer after graduation. I think it was the most rambunctious party she ever had, 7 people ages 18 to 21 sitting around drinking wine coolers, eating Dominoes and listening to Green Day Lol. My oldest is 22. The closest she came to an underage drinking party was a Dungeons and Dragons meeting/gaming group where people who were over 21 were participating and drinking beer. Not exactly a “get drunk” sort of party and according to DD (who, at this point would tell me given what else she has told me) no one underage was drinking because the host was terrified of it. I guess, I have just seen these sorts of parties and situations on TV, read about them online, but they don’t represent the real life I live. Of course, reality media is rarely reality, right? When I was in eighth grade, a group of students brought and consumed alcohol to our outdoor education week (camping). They were suspended. When I was a freshman in high school, 60 sophomore students were suspended for being at an underage party that was busted by the cops. 60. I went to a medium-small high school. I went to the the good school in town, which is rated will on national ratings for high schools too. So, it happens. Even with the "good kids". I actually discussed this, again, with my teens. Wake me up if you are under 18. I don't want you held responsible in anyway. I will take you to go pick them up and go from there, depending on the situation. If you are over 18, and still want me to drive with you, I will. My kids are always allowed to call me for a ride, no questions asked if they are in an unsafe situation. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katy Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 Well some areas have local laws about this sort of thing as well. If in doubt, call your local police or sheriff's office non-emergency number during office hours and ask them. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmandaVT Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 24 minutes ago, happysmileylady said: If somehow my kid ended up in that sort of situation, I would want my kid to wake me up and I would drive. And wake up drunk friends parent. But, I often wonder in these types of threads...who are these people? This is not a put down on the OP or anyone else, more a question on internet vs real life. I literally never attended a party...or even KNEW of a party where underage drinking happened. At 16, a “party” for my friends and I was: we meet at Don Pablo’s, have dinner, then go to X friends house and watch rented videos till 3am. My sister was a smidge more “worldly” I guess and she hosted a “party “ for her friends (like 6 to 10 people) where underage drinking happened. But...she was 18 and in her own apartment. It was her “housewarming” party. She moved out the summer after graduation. I think it was the most rambunctious party she ever had, 7 people ages 18 to 21 sitting around drinking wine coolers, eating Dominoes and listening to Green Day Lol. My oldest is 22. The closest she came to an underage drinking party was a Dungeons and Dragons meeting/gaming group where people who were over 21 were participating and drinking beer. Not exactly a “get drunk” sort of party and according to DD (who, at this point would tell me given what else she has told me) no one underage was drinking because the host was terrified of it. I guess, I have just seen these sorts of parties and situations on TV, read about them online, but they don’t represent the real life I live. Of course, reality media is rarely reality, right? In high school, kids would regularly bring alcohol into class with them. I remember many days seeing my classmates drunk by 10 am. Kids would go outside for lunch and walk across to the woods and drink and smoke in the woods. I was in all AP and high honors classes in a pretty good school. I didn't attend many parties in high school, but the ones I attended always had tons of beer and usually hard liquor as well. One of my close friends had dug a nice rectangular hole in his backyard, fit a chest into it that he filled with high-quality liquor and re-fit the sod on top of the lawn. His parents never knew. He was our valedictorian and ended up at Harvard Law School. He's now a partner in a respected law firm. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spryte Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 I would want my child to wake me, and we’d go together to pick up the friend. I would make sure everyone stays safe, and if there were no pressing health issues (alcohol poisoning, etc) would not wake the parents but would talk to them in the next day or two, after talking to the (probably hungover) kid. Actually, talking to the parents at all would depend on what the kid had to say. Some states have curfews for teen drivers, anyway, so a parent may have to drive, no matter what. Honestly, I can’t see this scenario happening, though it’s possible. It certainly did not happen with our 26 yr old, when he was a teen. OP, if this is a hypothetical, are you just trying to come up with every scenario? Kudos to you, that would make me feel crazy! But you’ll be better prepared than I. To the PP who said this isn’t her reality: I hear you. It’s not mine, either. I do think there is drinking/party culture everywhere though and some kids are more likely to find it than others. I am mid-40s, and last summer was having a discussion with a new SIL. She was shocked to hear what high school I had attended, and said they had studied it in her deviant psychology class! Because of parties, etc. Whoa. I had no idea it was that pervasive there. And I was there during the time period in the book, I knew there was substance use, but not that it was so extreme. But I was in with the straight edge crowd, so I guess if I knew, it just wasn’t part of my world. It was a fairly large school of about 4,000. Easy to put blinders on and only see one’s tiny subculture. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
73349 Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 Your dc shouldn't go into the party to retrieve the friend, just text from outside. I'd prefer that in that situation DH went or we just called the friend's parent. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmandaVT Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 To answer the OP, sorry, got distracted in my last post: I'd want to be woken up and would go with my teen to pick up the friend. I have an uncle who gave me the "I'll pick you up any time any place, no questions asked" talk when I was in high school and I liked knowing that someone would be there for me if I ever needed it. I never did, but just knowing it was an option, made me feel safe. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jewellsmommy Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 I think that sort of situation requires an adult's judgement. I would expect/advise dd to wake us. The friend being picked up could be in need of medical attention. I don't know that most teens would be able to recognize that if they saw it. Or what if friend has passed out inside the party and needs to be retrieved? What if others attempt to intervene? There is just too much that can go wrong. Some are mean when they are drunk, most are complete idiots at best. That can be a bit to manage. Dd has never been around a drunk person. I'm pretty sure it would make her nervous. Dd had a slight run-in with underage drinking recently. She went to a friend's slumber party. It included two older girls who coerced a younger sibling of dd's friend (host of the party) into drinking. There was only one beer in the house and the three split it. Dd, friend, and a few others were in another room unaware. When dd discovered what had happened, she panicked and assumed that the sibling (only 13yo) was now drunk. She wanted her friend to go wake her parents. Everyone tried to "contain" dd and convince her to be quiet etc. Many words (and a mild threat) were spoken to dd. She got very upset. Dd texted us to pick her up immediately. Honestly, it scared the snot out of us because we were expecting a much different/worse scene. Thankfully,it wasn't what we had imagined. Dh called the parents of the friend (host) and sibling, once he removed dd, and told them they had a small situation to tend to downstairs. I bring this up just to show how emotions, lack of experience, and other people could change situations for the worst rather quickly, thankfully this ended just fine. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reefgazer Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 22 hours ago, SquirrellyMama said: Yes, I agree that it is obvious to get the kid home safely. I just want to make sure my kid doesn't get in trouble for going to the party to get the friend. And, if I know about the party am I legally obligated to make sure the police know. Just curious. Lyft and Uber aren't that big around here. Kelly Honestly, I would just call your state police non-emergency number and ask what the legal ramifications would be for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted June 5, 2018 Share Posted June 5, 2018 They would wake us up, because no one in my family would just leave the house at 2 am or something without a word to anyone. Adults included. We would go with them for a couple of reasons. One, they aren't experienced drunk wranglers. Two, they are elf-sized, which is not ideal when a more typically sized person decides to pass out or grab for the keys. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKL Posted June 6, 2018 Share Posted June 6, 2018 I would prefer a mature adult do the driving in that situation, but I don't think it's illegal for a teen ... though like you said, it might depend on the state and the age of the teen as far as their being allowed to drive an unrelated teen around etc. I would advise my kid that if he's driving anyone around, they can't have open containers or whatever the law is about that. My kid will have to have the guts to tell his friend to leave the booze behind. Some states have laws that prevent a youth from being prosecuted if they report their friend being in trouble - for example, say they are both in a situation involving illegal drugs or underaged drinking, and one of them fears for the other's safety. Then he could call the cops and report and give a statement without himself being prosecuted. If your state has this kind of law, it might apply to driving a friend away from a bad situation and then calling the cops. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
linders Posted June 6, 2018 Share Posted June 6, 2018 16 hours ago, happysmileylady said: If somehow my kid ended up in that sort of situation, I would want my kid to wake me up and I would drive. And wake up drunk friends parent. But, I often wonder in these types of threads...who are these people? This is not a put down on the OP or anyone else, more a question on internet vs real life. I literally never attended a party...or even KNEW of a party where underage drinking happened. At 16, a “party” for my friends and I was: we meet at Don Pablo’s, have dinner, then go to X friends house and watch rented videos till 3am. I'm surprised. Where we live - a pretty nice, smallish town, it is well-known by kids and teachers and parents who aren't naive that at least half the teens are drinking and/or smoking pot. Not every night, not even every weekend, but often enough. Nice kids, kids with good grades, kids who are in Young Life (I've heard stories from the post-Young Life meeting parties). DS17 shows me some (though definitely not all) of the Snapchats, where these idiot kids actually film themselves doing this stuff then post it online. DS has been invited to several graduation parties the last few weeks. He declined most, because he knew many of the kids would just head out back and drink. One host parent even told me she offered that anyone who wanted/needed to could spend the night because "she didn't want anyone drinking then driving." She wasn't supplying the alcohol, but she knew it would slip in, and she felt like she couldn't monitor every room and outdoor space. ETA: When I was in school in the dark ages (1970s), there were lots of parties with drinking. I was such a goody-goody that I didn't go. Heck, most of the time my friends didn't bother inviting me. And I hung out with the high academic crowd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scholastica Posted June 6, 2018 Share Posted June 6, 2018 18 hours ago, happysmileylady said: If somehow my kid ended up in that sort of situation, I would want my kid to wake me up and I would drive. And wake up drunk friends parent. But, I often wonder in these types of threads...who are these people? This is not a put down on the OP or anyone else, more a question on internet vs real life. I literally never attended a party...or even KNEW of a party where underage drinking happened. At 16, a “party” for my friends and I was: we meet at Don Pablo’s, have dinner, then go to X friends house and watch rented videos till 3am. My sister was a smidge more “worldly” I guess and she hosted a “party “ for her friends (like 6 to 10 people) where underage drinking happened. But...she was 18 and in her own apartment. It was her “housewarming” party. She moved out the summer after graduation. I think it was the most rambunctious party she ever had, 7 people ages 18 to 21 sitting around drinking wine coolers, eating Dominoes and listening to Green Day Lol. My oldest is 22. The closest she came to an underage drinking party was a Dungeons and Dragons meeting/gaming group where people who were over 21 were participating and drinking beer. Not exactly a “get drunk” sort of party and according to DD (who, at this point would tell me given what else she has told me) no one underage was drinking because the host was terrified of it. I guess, I have just seen these sorts of parties and situations on TV, read about them online, but they don’t represent the real life I live. Of course, reality media is rarely reality, right? Well, I went to plenty of parties in high school where there was underage drinking. These people are regular kids, many of them college-bound who manage to get ahold of alcohol and drugs. Kids can choose to participate or not. You and your friends chose not to participate. I'm sure you could have found it if you wanted to. It's really very common. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 6, 2018 Share Posted June 6, 2018 I know it is going on for sure. My two boys are not running with anyone like that....My son wouldn't even taste the whip cream with bourbon I made the other week because he wanted to drive later and he takes that 'zero tolerance' law very seriously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ivey Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 I would prefer that my teen wake me, so I could intervene or go along with him if I felt it was necessary. At the very least, I would expect him to text or leave a note to say where he was going. My husband and I went to plenty of parties and occasionally drank as teens, and we know that two of our adult children did as well. My 15yo attended prom this year, and was invited to several graduation parties, prom after-parties, etc. so we have had several good discussions about drinking/drugs/safety lately. Luckily, one of our adult sons is willing to pick his little brother up at all hours of the night, so I get to sleep. ? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scarlett Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 I graduated high school in 1983 and drug use and alcohol use was rampant. I somehow avoided it. So so many bad things happened to my classmates. OD, murdered, murders, jail, suicide, death by car accident, severely disabled from car accident.....It was a very rough class or two there.....I have no idea if things have changed in that small, isolated, elitest town or not. My high school experience was high on the list of why I wanted to homeschool. And I so so happy that it seems to have paid off with my son. I am aware he could now just go off the rails but he seems grounded and I would be very surprised if he did it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pen Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 On 6/4/2018 at 2:27 PM, SquirrellyMama said: We haven't had this situation, but I want to be prepared. The answer might depend on the state. I'm in Iowa. What if my kid gets a call from a friend who is drunk at a party, and wants my kid to come pick them up. What do they do? Do they wake me up, and say can we go pick this kid up? Can they go themselves without getting in trouble? Call the kid's parents to get their own kid? Do we get the friend then call the cops on the party? Call the cops first? Not call the cops at all? We may never have this situation, but I would like to know what the right answer is. Kelly I agree with those who suggested you should call police / sheriff nonemergency number and ask what you should do in your city/state/ rural area as case may be But I am confused about why your teen would be likely to be called to deal with this sort of situation. Sounds like maybe your teen is involved with someone who is expected to get drunk at parties your teen won’t be at. ????? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AimeeM Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 No matter the legalities of it, I wouldn't want my teenager going into that situation without me or their dad. Our OWN policy for this, if our kid is the drunk one, is for them to call us -- and there will be no questions asked. However, when there's another kid involved, it gets dicier. The cautious side of me would say you (the adult -- bring your teen if you want) pick up Drunk Kid and take them to their own home, ensuring the parents know. Because what if they become ill? An adult needs (ideally) to be aware. However, this may very well lead to the other teen not trusting you, not trusting their friend (your kid), and/or your own kid not trusting you with similar information later on. The other side of me wants to say that you go and get the kid and bring him/her back to your own house. But, then, we have liability to contend with if the kid becomes ill -- and you have an underage drunk kid on your hands if you have to deal with EMTs or similar. And if it gets back to Drunk Kid's parents, there is the chance that the kid may no longer be allowed to socialize with you and yours -- so any trust that was there, is broken. Really, just a sticky situation all around. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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