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HollyDay
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A dear friend of our family died unexpectedly a few days ago.  I would like to send his wife something later this week, after all the out of town guests (myself included) are gone and life begins to settle into a new routine for her.  Suggestions?  I was thinking Sherrie's Berries.  Or maybe a meal?  Honey Baked Ham?  I know lots of people provide meals and such in the beginning, but as time goes on, life goes back to normal for other people, but not for her. 

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I think any of those would be nice.  Another suggestion--mark on your calendar notable days, like monthly/yearly anniversaries of passing, and also birthday and wedding anniversary and reach out then with a card, or even a text or email that she and esp. her loved one are not forgotten.

I lost someone dear to me 11 YEARS ago last week, and on the anniversary of the death, 4 friends sent me notes. It made me feel SO LOVED that they remembered/cared after all this time.

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later - should be a couple weeks or more.  it's not just when everyone has gone, it's when all the food has also gone.   I had leftovers from the meal after my mother's  for at least a week.

a local place that delivers would be nice. she might not feel like going out by herself when she's used to going out as a couple.

 

and thinking of you note delivered every few weeks or month. something silly, or that she would enjoy.

a friend said she just wanted things to be normal.

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Apparently sending cards in the mail is not as common as it was in the past.

A newly widowed friend thanked me later for the quick postcards I sent--but just reaching out by text/email/whatever is welcome.

Some days are harder than others in this painful process.  Just do what you can---and don't take on guilt!

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