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Ball ame tonight.  All 3 kids covered in dirt. DD9 played so she had “eye black” on her face, plus diamond dirt and so on. DD7 didn’t play but there was a playground full of old mulch and black dirt nearby and she was basically laying in the dirt and burying herself.  DS 5 was digging in the dirt right near the diamond.  So, yeah, all of them were FILTHY. 

 

The game should have started at six but we had an umpire problem and started late.  Then I missed our turn and we ended up with 15 extra minutes of driving on the way home.  So, we were already 5 min to “bedtime” when we got home.   With kids covered in filth. 

 

I just sent sent them to bed.  Well, after like 15 minutes for everyone to unwind.  I thought about insisting on baths but...the tub only holds one.  It uses everything in the water heater to fill it and can take a while to heat enough water for the next bath. So for three kids we are looking at like 3 hours of baths...after getting home after 8:30 pm. 

Would you have pushed for baths, or just sent them to bed knowing that baths/showers AND washing of the bedding would have to happen tomorrow.  

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I think you were right. You deserve a break. A little dirt never hurt anyone. They will probably sleep great tonight & everyone can get squeaky clean tomorrow. Pat yourself on the b

I say sneak in & get photos of your filthy, peacefully sleeping kids. Years from now, those photos will make you smile.

I love how you commented on this thread and your username is Dust. 

10 minutes ago, happysmileylady said:

Ball ame tonight.  All 3 kids covered in dirt. DD9 played so she had “eye black” on her face, plus diamond dirt and so on. DD7 didn’t play but there was a playground full of old mulch and black dirt nearby and she was basically laying in the dirt and burying herself.  DS 5 was digging in the dirt right near the diamond.  So, yeah, all of them were FILTHY. 

 

The game should have started at six but we had an umpire problem and started late.  Then I missed our turn and we ended up with 15 extra minutes of driving on the way home.  So, we were already 5 min to “bedtime” when we got home.   With kids covered in filth. 

 

I just sent sent them to bed.  Well, after like 15 minutes for everyone to unwind.  I thought about insisting on baths but...the tub only holds one.  It uses everything in the water heater to fill it and can take a while to heat enough water for the next bath. So for three kids we are looking at like 3 hours of baths...after getting home after 8:30 pm. 

Would you have pushed for baths, or just sent them to bed knowing that baths/showers AND washing of the bedding would have to happen tomorrow.  

 They would all have bathed in ice water before I would have put them in bed dirty. 

Sorry.  You did ask. 

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5, 7 and 9?  I might have had them wash their hands & faces and go to bed.  I might have had the 9 year old take a bath.  Either way, they're all getting baths and clean sheets right after breakfast.

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I would absolutely not use ice water, but I would heat water on the stove and sponge bathe the youngest in the kitchen (proper bath in the morning), and the older two would have timed Navy showers. (Turn on the water to get wet. Turn off water. Soap all over. Turn off water to rinse.)

If you have a shower, why would you not use it, and instead choose to skip baths because you need three hours for three baths?

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I would've had water conservation showers all around, as Tibbie describes. No way I'd send them to bed filthy.

But we all make our own choices. This isn't an abusive or neglectful one, just not the one I'd make.

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2 minutes ago, Tibbie Dunbar said:

I would absolutely not use ice water, but I would heat water on the stove and sponge bathe the youngest in the kitchen (proper bath in the morning), and the older two would have timed Navy showers. (Turn on the water to get wet. Turn off water. Soap all over. Turn off water to rinse.)

If you have a shower, why would you not use it, and instead choose to skip baths because you need three hours for three baths?

Ok, I probably would not have used ice water. 

But I could probably count on one hand in 18 years my kid went to bed without a bath. 

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Well, all I can say is they will live. My ds went to bed with dirty feet (summertime, barefoot all day) when my dh was in charge - more than once from what I heard later. He is an adult now and seems to have suffered no ill effects from this.

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7 minutes ago, Scarlett said:

Ok, I probably would not have used ice water. 

But I could probably count on one hand in 18 years my kid went to bed without a bath. 

It’s funny...for dd22, I would never have sent her to bed without a bath after a game. I don’t rhink I ever did. 

But with all 3 kids in this house it’s just SO HARD.  

All three will get a bath in the morning. And all bedding will get washed.  I just didn’t have the energy to do it tonight.  

 

ETA; in our old house, I could have put Dd in the bath, washed her uniform and taken a shower myself and then DH could have showered and everyone in bed in 2 hrs. This water heater here just isn’t so hearty.  

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We shower every night before bed (always have) and yes sometimes we come home late but still do quick showers.

in your case, I would be washing all the bedding as soon as they got up.

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4 minutes ago, happysmileylady said:

It’s funny...for dd22, I would never have sent her to bed without a bath after a game. I don’t rhink I ever did. 

But with all 3 kids in this house it’s just SO HARD.  

All three will get a bath in the morning. And all bedding will get washed.  I just didn’t have the energy to do it tonight.  

Well, not trying to be judgy.  I do realize 3 kids is harder than one.  But baths were my hill to,die on. We all have our thing. People don't get into my beds dirty. 

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We have 1.25gpm shower heads on hoses. The younger kids would have showered with my help and the nine year old would have showered last on a 5 min timer. Everyone would have been done in 20 min. It’s an art form to rush everyone through...but dirty sheets freak me out, in part because allergies + asthma would mean a 1am nebulizer treatment.

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12 minutes ago, prairiewindmomma said:

We have 1.25gpm shower heads on hoses. The younger kids would have showered with my help and the nine year old would have showered last on a 5 min timer. Everyone would have been done in 20 min. It’s an art form to rush everyone through...but dirty sheets freak me out, in part because allergies + asthma would mean a 1am nebulizer treatment.

 

Looking back (it's been a few years since mine were little), this is where I was coming from - two of them had to have all pollen washed off before bed, although if we did that, they could play outside all day. One also has a dust allergy. And a third boy of mine would have been too uncomfortable to sleep, if he was all dirty, especially because he always got too hot at night and had sensory issues! I had one out of four who could sleep in any condition, but for the rest of them, it would have only meant less sleep for all of us. Better to just move very fast and get them all clean and tucked in, and then collapse. 

If nobody feels prickly and hot when they're dirty, and they're able to fall asleep all dirty and sticky, and none of them are susceptible to rashes, and you don't have to worry that they picked up ticks when they were lolling about at the ball diamond, and none of them have allergies or asthma, then no, it wouldn't matter if they skipped one bath. Pretend they're camping. But three hours of baths plus all the waiting for the hot water to wash three beds' worth of bedding, that'll be a fun day tomorrow! That's not meant to be judgy or snarky - I think a lot of kids could go to sleep just fine. And you are probably used to your hot water situation and have workarounds for laundry. But I hope you all get some good rest (and that you're already asleep).

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I would have insisted on quick showers, starting with the littlest one, so I could help them more and make sure the shower happened fast, and get the youngest to bed fastest. I would have set a short timer for the next one or incentivized them with a small bowl of ice cream or a dollar or something if they could shower in less than five minutes.

I'm not finicky about many things, but I simply could not send a dirty child to bed. Even if it meant getting to bed late.

But hey, if it doesn't bother you, and didn't bother them, I don't exactly consider it abusive or a health hazard, so I'm not really judging. ? Just saying, that's how I would have handled it.

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I would probably have at the very least wiped the younger two down with a soapy washcloth, while I sent the big one to shower. I do actually let my kids go to bed without bathing, all the time, but what you describe would have been just a bit too dirty for me. If I really didn't want to, I'd change the sheets in the morning, but they'd have to at least thoroughly wash their hands and faces. But I have a thing with dirty faces. *shudder*

Mine had a gymnastics meet last Saturday and she told me afterward that she was just going to bed with crunchy hair because there was no way she'd have energy to shower. Her hair had SO much product in it. Whatever. Just like bathing is Scarlett's hill to die on, kids getting enough sleep is mine. So if it's bathing vs. sleep, sleep is going to win in our house. (And it is a win/lose for us - my children do NOT sleep in, no matter how late they're up. And then we ALL suffer,)

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I would have suggested showers. But probably would have let them go to bed dirty. I generally only start enforcing daily or every other day bathing at puberty. My kids, that filthy and tired, would melt down if I tried to make them shower.

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This thread title made me laugh. Sometimes I let dd go to bed kinda dirty (like she drew on herself and we didn't get all the pen off) because it's late and we're exhausted. But, we don't usually do  baths here. We do showers. So alternatively you could make each one take a fast shower perhaps, instead of a full bath. I imagine that would stretch the hot water situation?? Or at least the amount of time for each to bathe since you don't have to wait on the tub to fill up.

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I probably would have had them either bath one after another in the same water or poured two inches of water for each of them. If I was too tired to bother or the sheets were already due to be washed then I wouldn't have hesitated to send them off to bed.

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Meh. It's just dirt. It's not like it's going to soak into their skin overnight and inside their veins will become mud. 

Mine would have gotten baths in the morning, unless one of them was exceptionally dirty and sweaty and complaining about being too hot to sleep (mine does do that sometimes) But it would be a quick shower. Not a full on bath. 

And, *gasp* I probably wouldn't wash the sheets the next day either. Assuming there isn't visible mud/dirt all over the sheets. 

I would have had them brush themselves off the best they could (I tend to not get too involved in the whole going to sleep process, apart from bedtime stories,) and send them to bed. 

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7 minutes ago, Sk8ermaiden said:

I would probably have at the very least wiped the younger two down with a soapy washcloth, while I sent the big one to shower. I do actually let my kids go to bed without bathing, all the time, but what you describe would have been just a bit too dirty for me. If I really didn't want to, I'd change the sheets in the morning, but they'd have to at least thoroughly wash their hands and faces. But I have a thing with dirty faces. *shudder*

Mine had a gymnastics meet last Saturday and she told me afterward that she was just going to bed with crunchy hair because there was no way she'd have energy to shower. Her hair had SO much product in it. Whatever. Just like bathing is Scarlett's hill to die on, kids getting enough sleep is mine. So if it's bathing vs. sleep, sleep is going to win in our house. (And it is a win/lose for us - my children do NOT sleep in, no matter how late they're up. And then we ALL suffer,)

Hmmm.....sleep is also high on my list.  But being at the ball park too long is the real problem....not the 5 minutes per kid it would take to get them clean.  No way i would do any version of 3 hours worth of baths.  

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Baseball is so dirty. I usually felt like I needed a shower just from taking care of the grimy kids and wind blowing the dirt around etc. yuck. And the laundry is just so nasty. You have to clean the kids and the clothes and then the bathtubs and the washing machine need to be cleaned. Yuck.

Sorry. I would probably have bathed them but I’m certain in our years of travel ball with 3 younger siblings in tow it happened here. I never could bear to wake a sleeping kid for a bath. I remember carrying toddlers in asleep and putting them down filthy.

Baseball is such a dirty sport to manage. You have my sympathy and no judgement here. 

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1 hour ago, Dust said:

Meh. It's just dirt. It's not like it's going to soak into their skin overnight and inside their veins will become mud. 

Mine would have gotten baths in the morning, unless one of them was exceptionally dirty and sweaty and complaining about being too hot to sleep (mine does do that sometimes) But it would be a quick shower. Not a full on bath. 

And, *gasp* I probably wouldn't wash the sheets the next day either. Assuming there isn't visible mud/dirt all over the sheets. 

I would have had them brush themselves off the best they could (I tend to not get too involved in the whole going to sleep process, apart from bedtime stories,) and send them to bed. 

I love how you commented on this thread and your username is Dust. 

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Just piping up to remind everyone who is saying "quick showers" are the answer.

Well, not if you have kids who are uber-sensitive to water splashing on their faces. That's just a "no" right there, lol. Just sayin' (from my own personal experiences). Of course, my dc have no problems w/ showers now, but when they were younger, showers were a struggle, while baths were fine.

So what might work for one child might not work for another.

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I'm with others... I would have insisted on a quick shower or at least done hands and faces. But you didn't make the wrong call or anything. It's not a big deal either way.

We're not beyond the need for that strict bedtime hour being honored. But I remember when it really, really mattered a lot.

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1 hour ago, Stacia said:

Just piping up to remind everyone who is saying "quick showers" are the answer.

Well, not if you have kids who are uber-sensitive to water splashing on their faces. That's just a "no" right there, lol. Just sayin' (from my own personal experiences). Of course, my dc have no problems w/ showers now, but when they were younger, showers were a struggle, while baths were fine.

So what might work for one child might not work for another.

This is true. Mine just kinda got used to showers early on because not all our homes have had decent tubs. Like this house, the tub is in awful shape. We rent and they won't reglaze it. We also only have one bathroom so not the best situation for taking a bath lol. 

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Been there.... done that.  I have totally sent kids to bed without washing more than hands and faces after baseball games.  Or hikes up hills.  Or playing all afternoon in the dirt.  If the sheets looked dirty the next day, then those would get washed.  Otherwise, my kids generally got bathed just twice a week GASP.

They are all pretty grown now and generally shower every day or every other day.   Not getting a bath every day does not seem to have hampered their development in any way.  Relax - you can always wipe them down in the morning.

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we only have kids bath every second day, but if they have visible dirt they have a bath before bed. I pop one in after the other into the same water. We have to conserve water here.

 

If I don't bath with visible dirt then it is more work the next day to wash the sheets 

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It's not a big deal, just like camping or backpacking. I might have tried to get the eye black off it it didn't cause the child to go into hysterics. We've driven home a few times after a big day out and just carried sleeping kids to their beds and put them down. Daily bathing of kids isn't really good for their skin anyway.

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If they were really filthy, I would have given them a quick wash down and put them to bed.  At least their faces, so their pillows wouldn't be covered in muck.

That said, I'm not a prude about baths.  Ideally we bathe every night; in reality, it gets late and if my kids promise to wash and put on deodorant the next morning, I will often let it go.

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My kids were about those ages that we learned the art of the quick shower .   We’d throw each in for a couple minutes, soap up and rinse off.  Dry, jammies, bed.   My kids fell asleep faster and slept better after getting clean.  Especially after a busy evening of being outside and getting hot, dirty, and sweaty.   Bedtime was always more flexible during the summer months.   I would have felt like I need to wash bedding the next day too had we not which is way more work.  

 

We did camp too and had weird days like the 4th where we’d be extra late and didn’t but the vast majority of the time we did this and got it as a quick routine.  

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I would have put them to bed and not worried any more about it.  I read your other post and sympathize.  Baseball season is slowly killing me this year and my kids are older than yours.  Every night games and not getting home until 9 or later is exhausting my 8 year old who usually goes to bed at about 8.  They can bathe in the morning!

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One of my least favorite things about motherhood is bathing my kids.  I don't know why, it just does NOT give me the warm fuzzies.  It's right up there with changing diapers, lol.  

But I hate washing sheets even more.  ?  

 

So I would have hosed them down, probably all at once, standing upright in the tub, assembly-line style.  This is how I tend to wash mine anyway, so nothing new there.  haha

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I haven't read all the replies; I was so stunned by the responses I read that I had to stop and post.  I hope others have come in before me to say that going to bed filthy once in a while is fine.  I'm sure I went to bed filthy as a kid, and though I don't remember for sure, can't imagine I've not had my kids do the same.

I would answer differently if, say, there was a reason that everyone had to be up and clean early the next morning, or health issues (allergies) necessitated it.  I might be annoyed if the sheets were fresh and I had to wash them again the next day.  But otherwise... dirt really isn't harmful.

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I don't think it's a big deal either way.

For myself--I would have bathed them. By seven both of ours knew how to take a quick shower or bath and use little water, so the oldest two would have done that and I would have helped the five year old. It would have taken a total of about 15-20 minutes here, and hot water wouldn't be an issue because . . "quick" is the important word. Shoot, our RV has a two gallon hot water tank and DH and I can both take Navy showers right after each other and not run out. 

Not going to bed dirty is one of my "things," but that's not totally why I say the above. It's because I would have slept better knowing I didn't have to wash all the sheets the next day! So more selfish than anything. But I might have a different opinion if the next day were the normal sheet washing day.

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I've sent mine to bed dirty we all lived. I went to bed dirty many times growing up!

I try to send the older ones to bathe and have the younger one use a washrag to get the worst but some days that doesn't happen.

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My kids play outside in the dirt and dust all day long and get sweaty and they frequently only take a bath on Wednesdays and Sundays and I only wash sheets on Saturdays. Once they get to puberty they take showers every morning like my husband and I do, but in my house we all go to bed dirty every night with no evening baths for anybody.

No judgement for anybody who feels better doing it more frequently/differently than that! But it's not really been a health issue for us and I'm surprised people seem to think it is (or can be).

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Well, we've been doing Little League for more than a decade, starting with #1 of 5, so some of my kids have been born in the dirt.  There have absolutely been nights when they've gone to bed pretty dirty.  Maybe not entirely *filthy*, but dirty, for sure!  It isn't unusual for us to get home from a game well past 9:30, and we also have a small water heater.  And I don't feel guilty if I prioritize my own shower after sitting in the hot sun all evening! ? 

I do pack wet wipes to handle as much grime as possible before getting into the car.  And I definitely demanded showers after the two littlest ones spent a couple of evenings dumping playground dirt on each other's heads! ? 

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At that age my kids wouldn't do showers - sensory issues and the whole water in the face thing.  I'm sure there were times they were put to bed dirty because I didn't want the hassle of doing baths.  Now it's easy for me to send them to the shower - they can do the whole thing themselves.

We go camping quite a bit and depending on the set-up at the campground, showers could be easy or extremely complicated.  The kids often go to bed dirty when we camp (or "clean" because they swam in the lake, pool or river).   We may be talking about a week with one or two showers the entire time.  Occasionally that shower would be done with an icy cold hose, if it was earlier in the day and it was hot enough. 

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My kids had/have sensory issues too.   Learning to swim took forever for both of them.  We started shower training my youngest at 3 and it took some time.  We’d use a cup to wash her hair and would do her face with a washcloth.   But they can get used to it over time and can still get pretty clean with the bottom half of their body in the stream of water while we would use a couple cups of water out of the sink and a washcloth with adult help.  Less than 5 minutes in and out.

 

I do think a 3 hour bath routine is pretty untenable at those ages going into summer. I would go nuts.   I’d look for a solution to that.  

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I’d have sent my little dirtballs to bed.  Maybe with faces washed.  “Quick showers” only works if the kids know how to take a quick shower.  Otherwise, at the 5 minute mark, you’re left with not just a dirty kid, but now you’ve got a muddy kid.

Kids and sheets would be washed the next day.

I’d probably try to teach them how to do quick shower before the next ball game, though.  Or come up with some sort of plan.  (Basins of water, whatever.). 

 

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The bedtime deadline wouldn't have mattered to me.  (Our bedtime deadlines were hit and miss!)  And we didn't generally bathe every day either.  That always seemed over-the-top to me.  Three times/week seemed like plenty!  But I wouldn't have wanted to send them to bed covered head to toe in dirt unless we were all too exhausted.  And then if I made that decision (sending them to bed without washing), I would have been fine with it.  Sometimes you do what you have to do!   But I probably would have sent each of them into the shower for three minutes.  If no shower, then maybe standing in the tub while I poured water over them so they could get a quick wash-down.

Sometimes in the summer, if they were hot and sweaty and grimy but too tired to bathe at the end of the day, I'd have them at least sit on the side of the tub and wash their feet.  (Which were usually the dirtiest of all, after going barefoot all day!)

 

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