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Blessedwith1

Help, what is happening?

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Hi, I don’t post very much, but I do read a lot of your posts.

I have a 14 year old dd who is having such a difficult time socially. I noticed this a few weeks ago, but she just let on that she’s been dealing with this for a while. When she is in a big group she tends to become very quiet and just clams up. When I asked her about it, she said everything sort of fades and the voices sound like they are in a tunnel, and that she can’t concentrate. She has always been quiet, but not to this extent. We just relocated, so I thought this was it, but according to her, this has been going on for a few years now. I feel awful for not noticing it, but she had such a large group of friends and was always running around and chatting. Now I think about it, I’m not sure if she was just following along or actually participating. Any ideas, how can I help her? She has a doctor’s appointment tomorrow, not for this, but I will bring it up.

I apologise for any grammatical errors, but I’m so upset and typing on my phone.

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Sounds like social anxiety.

 

Does she avoid social situations or express anxiety prior to participating in them? Or does this only occur while she's in the midst?

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I thought of anxiety as well.  Back when I used to perform, I had such bad stage fright that everything went dark.  This sounds like that.  Especially if she has no trouble hearing people in groups if they are people that she is comfortable with.  (If she has trouble in that setting also then it could be auditory processing.)

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I have social anxiety. This sounds like exactly how I feel in most social situations. It can be really disorienting and frustrating.

Before I started counselling and cognitive behavioural therapy, being around people would feel like being at a carnival in the mirror house.

 

I'd talk to her doc when you go tomorrow, maybe check into auditory issues. It might not be anxiety, but that's worth looking into.

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Thanks for all the responses. I am inclined to think it’s anxiety. She is always so excited about social activities, but then when we arrived, she freezes up. She doesn’t have this problem when she is with people she knows well. We had lunch with two girls and a mum a few weeks ago, and she was so quiet, barely said two words. After we left, I asked her if everything was all right and that’s when she told me about the fading and tunnel like feeling. She also gets it in a classroom setting, and can’t focus on what the teacher is saying, so that confused me. We tried an online class and she could concentrate either.

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Dealing with this exact same thing here with a 12 yo girl.  Social Anxiety, but still "want" it enough to try and brave it out.  Praise her for it, it helps.  

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My first thoughts are anxiety and/or auditory processing difficulties. Probably both, but I think the auditory processing can often be the cause of the anxiety.

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I agree with others this sounds like Social Anxiety Disorder but it could also be coupled with Auditory Processing Disorder (and the two may be feeding off each other).  You can have good hearing and still have APD.  I would look into both.

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