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Feeling overwhelmed - What's your go-to relaxation?


Jenny in Florida
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Well, I can't be "certain," but I have been plugged into the local arts stuff for a pretty long time. I get weekly e-mails from a number of venues who sponsor the kinds of stuff I like; my son is a semi-professional performer; and I work with a bunch of musicians.

 

I'm sure there's lots of great stuff out there, but we have only one opera company (well, kind of one and a half, but I'm on both  mailing lists) and one philharmonic, so . . .

 

One of the most fun concerts I went to was our national orchestra playing with a Canadian Celtic fiddle family. Great music, great energy from the fiddling and step dancing, and just shear fun. The conductor of the orchestra said his face hurt because he was smiling so hard. 

 

It sounds to me like you need something fun to make your face hurt from smiling. Maybe take a risk and try something new, that you never expected you'd enjoy.

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When my MIL gets angry or frustrated she cleans house.  She ordinarily keeps a pretty clean house as it is, but there's a certain level of clean that announces to her grown sons that Mom has been CLEANING again.  She's ready to talk about whatever it is when she sits down from cleaning.

 

My sister and her best friend had a practice they called "Your problem is the solution to my problem."  Basically, when one felt so overwhelmed by whatever they would talk to the other about whatever was troubling the other.  Brainstorming about each others' problems seemed to help the both of them.  When they were tired and needing to eat they would even go to a restaurant and order for each other because while they were each too brain-dead to think what they wanted to eat for themselves, they could manage to think it through on each other's behalf.

 

My aunt/second mother/godmother once amazed me by embracing stand-still rush hour traffic.  She'd deliberately join the slowest lane of traffic and put on some music or an audiobook that she enjoyed.  She said it was guaranteed personal time she really couldn't get any other way (at the time).

 

 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:  regarding the thyroid imbalance.  Been there, done that, and it really stinks when things are out of whack.  It's like everything goes wonky and nothing seems right.

 

Would exploring around your neighborhood or surrounding area be an option?  Going for a walk outside, not overly far or long if you are worried about being away too long, without the dog, and maybe just popping into a business or shop here or there?  Not all who wander are lost.  Sometimes we are just out looking for a change of scene for a few minutes.  Sometimes, too, small explorations can lead to impromptu discoveries of something unexpected but enjoyable.  Small, ordinary interactions with other people sometimes help, too.

 

Once when I was having a VERY rough time I stopped at a grocery store for some necessities.  I was in a foul temper, and trying not to take it out on anyone around me but couldn't erase the scowl from my face.  The cashier gave me the most beautiful smile and greeted me with such warmth and cheer (which she was giving to everyone), and all that was weighing down on me just melted a bit, lightened.  I still had all of my issues that were plaguing me, but it was like getting recharged a bit.  I was able to carry on carrying on.  I'm a big introvert, but sometimes little things like that can make a difference.

 

I hope you find a way to rest and recharge, or at least get a chance of pace or scenery.  

 

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Actually I would completely expect to enjoy that kind of concert. 

 

I've enjoyed many, many different kinds of concerts and shows. 

 

What I don't enjoy is mediocre or substandard performances. So, I do, as I said, keep an eye on pretty much all of the offerings by local venues that sponsor good quality performances. For this weekend, there is nothing out there within a distance I am willing to drive for a ticket price I am willing to pay, Of that, I actually am pretty darned certain.

 

Or, at least, I'm certain enough that I am not willing to "take a risk" of wasting money and time and having to feel guilty about leaving my dog for something I "might" enjoy.

 

You have a million reasons for why you don't want to do anything, so maybe you need some time to do simply nothing at all. Just sit at home with the dog and not feel guilty about the choice to just sit at home. 

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You have a million reasons for why you don't want to do anything, so maybe you need some time to do simply nothing at all. Just sit at home with the dog and not feel guilty about the choice to just sit at home. 

 

Yup. Maybe do that one day, and then re-evaluate. 

 

Maybe binge on some olympics? Or old tv? 

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I am not sure how this might apply to you, but one thing I do when I am feeling sort of grumbly and blue about whatever current circumstances I'm facing is do the things I normally say to myself are a waste of time or money (which, kind of, they are) but that have some benefit and make me happy.

 

So for me, specifically, this means that I buy moo cards to put in customers' packages.  They're little business cards - half the size of normal ones- and you can get them printed with a zillion different images and they're beautiful.  They're very good quality and really too expensive.  But I am so much more willing to actually fill orders on time if I have one of the little cards to put in there, because I like the way it looks and it feels good. 

 

Also, for me, the part of the business I really like is product development.  We have too much work as it is a lot of the time so really I should NOT be devoting any time to product development because the last thing we need is more products.  But it's the thing I really like, my favorite less-than-1% of the business.

 

So if I'm feeling blue, I let myself take a few hours to look at new clip art, or read about design trends, or design a few new labels.  Then I buy our product photography, send them off to be photographed, and that holds me for months, just the newness and the fun of it.  If I did this as much as I wanted to (all day) we'd never get anything else done and the business would go bankrupt, so it's something I save for times when I really need a pick-me-up.  Maybe there is something similar in one of your hobbies or jobs?

 

 

Also, this sounds counter-intuitive, but sometimes I find that if I'm feeling blah and like I want to do something to indulge myself, especially as I am an introvert and am inclined to isolate myself in the basement bathroom with a book for hours, doing the opposite of that can change my mood faster than self-indulgence.    So what I want is say a fancy coffee drink and to spend the rest of the day by myself reading; what I do instead is take the kids to the park and buy them french fries and juice boxes.  Then I watch a movie with them, or with DH, that I didn't really want to watch, then I make everyone something fancy for dinner.  (these are all things I don't do very regularly, obviously).  Sometimes this works better than coffee and a book would have, for some reason, even though I should be drained by it (and would be if I did it every day).

Edited by eternalsummer
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