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Moxie

Vent about carpools

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Really, this is just me venting. Maybe I’m being taken advantage of?? Idk, I’m mostly annoyed.

 

Carpool #1. My child and a classmate to weekly sports practice. The other Mom failed to mention that she has car trouble. So now, not only am I driving the boys to BOTH practices, I’m also taking this child to and from school every day. How could I say no when she is standing there with a big sob story and telling me she has no way to get him to school?? She’s a nice lady but a total mess and I feel bad for the kid.

 

Carpool #2-one family is out of town. They were supposed to drive this week. No one told me they were going out of town until my kids texted wondering where their ride was (this is why all my kids have cell phones!). One woman in the carpool never drives (she works and her child lives near me so it doesn’t bug me to pick him up) but she was there to pick up her child today and didn’t think to bring mine home?? I’ve driven her child for two years!!

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Rude! 

 

I would most definitely text Mom #2 and ask her to drive your kids the rest of the week. 

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I changed my attitude about carpooling. I figured I was going so might as well fill the car. If someone could repay the kindness - bonus!!! Otherwise I ended up ticked off too often - how are people so flaky!

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I hate carpooling because of exactly what you have written.  People who start off sharing the driving and then end up dropping it all on me.  And people who I've driven forever who aren't thoughtful about helping me out when the need arises. 

 

side story - I drove a friend's daughter to school for two years. No swapping.  One day my car wouldn't start. One day in two entire school years of driving! I called to let the mom know and she said "no problem, I'll just take her to school."  No offer to come pick up my stranded kids.  When I asked her if she could help she was not able to come the two blocks to my house to help me when I needed it...  That still makes me mad!

 

That kind of thing ruins friendships and leaves a bad taste in your mouth...

 

After a few irritating kids and unhelpful friends, i decided I would do my best to always drive my own kids to practice.  I would not offer to do any kind of carpool, but I would be available if a friend needed help, once or twice, not forever.  It seemed like as soon as I set those personal boundaries for myself, I never (or rarely) had another problem with mooches!

 

So rude!  I can't believe she didn't offer to bring your kids home!

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side story - I drove a friend's daughter to school for two years. No swapping.  One day my car wouldn't start. One day in two entire school years of driving! I called to let the mom know and she said "no problem, I'll just take her to school."  No offer to come pick up my stranded kids.  When I asked her if she could help she was not able to come the two blocks to my house to help me when I needed it...  That still makes me mad!

 

 

Wow!  That's horrifying unless she had a really good excuse, by which I mean she commuted by flying motorcycle like Hagrid, or she was in active labor when you called and planned to go straight to the hospital.  

 

I can imagine that Moxie's "friend" just didn't clue in that her kids were still there, but if you actually asked and were told no that's terrible.  I hope you didn't keep driving her kid!

 

I have to say that my carpool experiences have been decent.  My kid was in a football carpool where 2 of the 4 kids got concussions and missed a significant portion of the season.  (Note: before someone points out that this is why football is bad, one kid got his concussion playing pick up basketball, and the other fell off his skateboard).  Both parents continued to drive, or in one case sent their nanny, on their assigned days the whole time their kids were out.  

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Wow!  That's horrifying unless she had a really good excuse, by which I mean she commuted by flying motorcycle like Hagrid, or she was in active labor when you called and planned to go straight to the hospital.  

 

 

I think it was something like she was headed to the dentist or something and there was no time to come by, since my house was 2 blocks in the opposite direction from the school/dentist.  I was able to call another friend to help me out, but it really made me feel used...  

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I think it was something like she was headed to the dentist or something and there was no time to come by, since my house was 2 blocks in the opposite direction from the school/dentist.  

 

Lame!

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For #2, ask her to watch your kid for the weekend or something.  It should be reciprocal-friends help each other. If it feels like a burden, time to shift the load!

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I hate hate hate carpools because I cannot abide dealing with other people's flakiness. People who are late, leave my kids stranded, cancel at the last minute, or pull stuff like this.

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I hate hate hate carpools because I cannot abide dealing with other people's flakiness. People who are late, leave my kids stranded, cancel at the last minute, or pull stuff like this.

Right!! Carpool is a commitment. My child was sick this weekend; I still picked up all the kids and took them to practice because it was my turn!! I sat at practice without my child and it sucked but it was my responsibility.

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