Random topic: do you do birthday swats?

[SKL 59,540]

Just curious how widespread this custom is and whether it has survived the changes in child-rearing philosophies in recent generations.

 

PS I don't know how to tell if this is a private or public poll or how to change that.

 

Feel free to comment also.  :)

Edited December 17, 2017 by SKL

[happypamama 10,463]

No.  My parents never did it.  We don't do it.  I hate the idea.

[rose 1,594]

We've done b-day bumps here. Basically, one person take the child's arms, another their legs, and then they are bumped up and down on the floor for the count of their age. It's all in fun and nobody gets hurt.

[luuknam 15,843]

What the what?!!

[kewb 9,127]

I don't recall my parents doing it but I do remember all the kids in class forming a line and the birthday kid crawled through everyone's legs and got a birthday whack on the butt.

[ThisIsTheDay 4,876]

We didn't do it, but my friends tried to do it to me when I had a birthday sleepover for my 11th? 12? birthday. It ruined the whole party for me, and I ended up spending the night in my room while everyone else slept in the family room. I got mad at them, and my mom got mad at me.

[Joker 13,772]

When I was growing up some would teasingly say it was time for birthday spankings but no one ever actually did it. I've never done it with my dc either.

[FuzzyCatz 19,199]

My only experience was this was when I was a child at a birthday party for a friend from school.  Her grandmother came in with a spoon and gave her birthday spankings in front of all her friends and she sobbed.  Needless to say, seems like a horrible and almost abusive idea to me. 

[happysmileylady 29,326]

There's no other.

 

I have heard of it.  It's been done occasionally both when I was growing up and as my kids have grown.  However, it was NEVER a tradition.  It wasn't something that was done every year, and in fact isn't done often at all.  I think I did it once as a joke with DD9, I don't think it's ever been done with the younger ones.

 

I can't recall any one specific birthday where my parents did it with me, but I recall in general it having been done more than once.......but only a few times.  Few enough that I can't recall specifically.

 

 

[happysmileylady 29,326]

My only experience was this was when I was a child at a birthday party for a friend from school.  Her grandmother came in with a spoon and gave her birthday spankings in front of all her friends and she sobbed.  Needless to say, seems like a horrible and almost abusive idea to me. 

 

Oh my, that's horrible!  Who on earth thinks that is an ingredient for a good birthday celebration.

 

 

 

Any time it's ever been done in our family it's NEVER anything like that, its ALL in goofing around, just like tickling.  And, just like when someone gets tickled, if they say to STOP, then the goofing stops!  I just can't imagine making someone cry on their birthday like that. 

[foxbridgeacademy 4,012]

My parent's did when were young but it didn't hurt, was a joke.  We would joke with the kids like we were going to but it always became "birthday tickles" instead.

[marbel 25,608]

I'd forgotten about that. I think my parents did it when I was young. I do remember it was a thing people did. It wasn't hard spanking, not hurtful.

I don't think I did it with my kids. I'd ask them if they were around right now.

[foxbridgeacademy 4,012]

I don't recall my parents doing it but I do remember all the kids in class forming a line and the birthday kid crawled through everyone's legs and got a birthday whack on the butt.

OMG, I remember this from like first grade! I was so thankful that my mom always let me skip school on my birthday.

[sassenach 13,683]

My family did it (sort of) and dh’s did, too. Dh did it with our kids and I always hated it, but he stops at 12 and my kids are all older so it’s no longer a tension point.

 

To be clear, these aren’t actual spankings, more like playful taps, but I still dislike it.

[Jaybee 3,319]

My dad did, but he was gentle and loving, and it was not something we dreaded or feared. He only did it when we were small, with the same kind of feel about it as a friendly wrestle or something. I have some vague memories that I can't quite place, that had to do with feelings of humiliation and embarrassment over this--but I'm at a loss to remember the setting of it. It wasn't in my immediate family environment though.

 

ETA: It didn't hurt, and was more playful. I'm wondering if the other was with my girlfriends when I was in my preteen/early teen years? I was never one to like practical jokes or being the center of attention.

Edited December 17, 2017 by Jaybee

[Loowit 3,281]

My dad did when we were little.  It was all in fun and didn't hurt at all.  It was just something silly we did.  I had forgotten about it when I had my own kids, so we never did it.  If we had it would only have been in fun and would have stopped if a child didn't want to do it.

[Megbo 175]

I've honestly never heard of parents spanking/swatting their kids on their birthday!

 

We did "birthday bumps" when I was a kid. My parents never did it, it was usually classmates, friends, and maybe a PE teacher or coach. It looked something like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1oqB03n_Jws

I also remember teenage boys punching each other on the arm for their birthdays, but I can't remember whether there was ever a name for this. 

[SKL 59,540]

I think Little House in the Big Woods has a story about this, for those who haven't heard of it.

[Cinder 4,993]

I haven't heard of these but we did have a somewhat similar tradition. As kids we'd give each other b-day punches on the arm--one for each year and an extra for good luck. The "tradition" was only observed during our elementary school years. By middle school it was a "little kid" thing.

[Night Elf 9,899]

You mean like light hitting? Egads! I've never heard of such a thing. I don't like the idea at all. Why should someone be spanked, even lightly, on a happy day?

[Selkie 23,593]

I don't recall my parents doing it but I do remember all the kids in class forming a line and the birthday kid crawled through everyone's legs and got a birthday whack on the butt.

 

Oh yes, that was done at the elementary school I went to and the teachers participated, too. Everyone called it The Spanking Machine. So weird!

 

We've never done birthday spanks or punches or pinches or anything of that sort in our family.

[Heatherwith4 4,175]

I vaguely remember my Kindergarten teacher doing this. It’s not a tradition in my family now, nor did we do it growing up.

Edited December 17, 2017 by heatherwith3

[Ethel Mertz 2,481]

We do birthday kisses.

[Garga 27,287]

I voted "what are you talking about" because I was thinking swat as in swat team and wondering if the family skulked around the house in some sort of hide and seek game.

 

Now that I read a few posts, I've heard of the birthday spankings and always thought it was the most bizarre thing. I may have known people who mentioned it, but I've never participated in anything like that.

 

It isn't something I would like to be a part of, but I can see how it can be done in a gentle manner and it can be silly--like tickling.

 

The tunnel of spanking at schools sounds creepy and horrible if you've got a bullied kid going through the tunnel. I was always the kid no one wanted to talk to and it would have been pure torture to have all the kids who purposefully excluded me all year smacking me. Ugh! I'm glad they do that in schools any more.

[Ausmumof3 25,076]

No and the little house story always felt off and the whole idea seems kinda creepy to me. Apologies to those who have a family tradition around it.

[nixpix5 4,770]

I remember this in the 80s as a thing but my family didn't do it. My dad or mom might tease and say "your 10 so 10 spankings for you" but never once actually did it. I remember I went to my friends party when she turned 8 and we did a "spanking machine" she crawled through and we all hit her on the butt. Seemed weird but innocent.

[lmrich 3,729]

I just got back from working out and thought this said birthday squats! My answer was OMG who would do that! Enjoy your birthday!

 

But no, I never understood that tradition. 

[Guest]

My family did it and I hated it. “And a pinch to grow an inch†I’ve never done it to my kids. Such a dumb idea.

Edited December 17, 2017 by Moxie

[SquirrellyMama 2,974]

I remember it happening a lot, but not in my family.

[solascriptura 2,601]

Do people really do that?

[BigMamaBird 3,075]

I don't actually give them. But sometimes I chase the kids around and threaten to. It ends in much shrieking and giggling and tickling and they love it. Just my own kids though. Not Aunts and cousins and such.

[Carolina Wren 18,772]

I do kisses. (I tease that this is why DS is tall. It takes some smooches to make a kid grow!)

 

DH's school did the "paddywhack machine" & the kids were rather brutal to each other (as they were generally). I find it horrifying.

Edited December 17, 2017 by whitehawk

[rebcoola 3,275]

Yes my dad always did but it is nothing like spanking gentle joking pats as part of fun wrestling time.  My parents didn't really spank us ever. 

[Quill 61,719]

I had kind of forgotten about this. But I do remember it being a thing, along with, “and a pinch for growing an inch!†I remember it mostly as something my sisters inflicted upon me.

 

No, I do not do this. I am extremely opposed to this kind of manhandling “for fun.â€

[Quill 61,719]

I do kisses. (I tease that this is why DS is tall. It takes some smooches to make a kid grow!)

 

DH's school did the "paddywhack machine" & the kids were rather brutal to each other (as they were generally). I find it horrifying.

Terrible. And the term “paddywhack†has it’s origins in hatred for Irish immigrants, I do believe.

[idnib 16,477]

Oh my goodness you've summoned a forgotten childhood memory of people (not my family) doing this at birthday parties and even at my school by teachers in front of all the kids.

[Chris in VA 17,805]

We did, and it was all in fun, and the kids thought it was fun, too. Turn about it fair play, and they got to spank Daddy, too, on his birthday. Then I gave birthday kisses, one per year.

Then we'd measure the kid and mark the wall. 

 

To each his own. It's something we didn't think of as abusive, more of a joke, and no one cried because no one got hurt. My kids don't see it as a bad part of their childhood. 

We stopped at 10 or so (I think earlier for the younger ones). 

 

I think there are lots of things that are part of one's culture that others can and do disagree with. 

[daijobu 5,025]

Kids in my old neighborhood would chant "a pinch to grow an inch.  a smile to grow a mile" at birthdays.  I don't remember actual pinching, maybe threats and chasing around the yard, but adults weren't involved.  

[creekland 41,103]

My family did it and I hated it. “And a pinch to grow an inch†I’ve never done it to my kids. Such a dumb idea.

 

Same here.  I absolutely hated it then and never even once thought about doing it to my own kids.  Some traditions need to die.  One wonders how they even became traditions to start with other than some influential bully getting it going.

 

My family thought it was "all in fun" and I suppose they enjoyed it, but I detested it with every ounce in my body every frickin' year.  Actually though, it stopped when my parents got divorced, so now that I think about it there is one good thing that came about due to their divorce (when I was 11).

[poppy 20,381]

My uncle did it playfully.  But he was abusive at other times.  One of his kids has written several poetry books about it, which are brutal to read.

 

I can see it being a fun thing if  you are Pa Wilder? Maybe?  I'm definitely not into it.

[hjffkj 21,318]

We did b-day punches. But my parents didn't do it to use it was siblings and friends all trying to get their bday punches in. Some of us still do it.

[Bluegoat 28,606]

I forgot about this too.  It wasn't a thing in our family, but I remember other families down it.  It always seemed very exciting when it happened.

[kewb 9,127]

My family did it and I hated it. “And a pinch to grow an inch†I’ve never done it to my kids. Such a dumb idea.

My sister was fond of giving me a good pinch to grow an inch. I had buried that memory.

[mom2scouts 5,775]

Oh yes, that was done at the elementary school I went to and the teachers participated, too. Everyone called it The Spanking Machine. So weird!

 

We've never done birthday spanks or punches or pinches or anything of that sort in our family.

 

Yes! It was called The Spanking Machine. We called through everyone's legs and most people spanked gently, but there was always someone who tried to hit hard. My parents didn't do it, but it was quite common among my friends. Looking back, it was really strange!

[alisoncooks 11,820]

Yes + the pinch to grow an inch. But it wasn't "real" hitting -- very light and joking.

My teachers also did it in school (the 80s).

[cintinative 5,065]

Oh my goodness! My SIL does this and she is a public school teacher. Once she was doing it to one of her students when the principal walked in  . . . LOL!! She was like "birthday spankings!!"   Oh, and yes, definitely, not a real hit--very light. I still crack up and her story about the principal walking in on her doing it. 

 

I had never heard of it before her. 

[Guest]

Oh my goodness! My SIL does this and she is a public school teacher. Once she was doing it to one of her students when the principal walked in . . . LOL!! She was like "birthday spankings!!" Oh, and yes, definitely, not a real hit--very light. I still crack up and her story about the principal walking in on her doing it.

 

I had never heard of it before her.

At our school, the birthday child wears a paper crown all day. Much less offensive.

[kiwik 5,558]

I think Little House in the Big Woods has a story about this, for those who haven't heard of it.

Yeah that is the only place I ever heard of it.

[Tammi K 4,307]

.

Edited December 18, 2017 by Tammi K

[Rachel 6,814]

I’ve heard of birthday spankings but only as a joke, “Oh Johnny, it’s your birthday, how many spankings will you get today?†I’ve never seen or heard of it actually being done for real or as a joke.