Have you become more or less judgmental with age?

[frogger]

I've never been particularly judgemental, in the sense I believe you are using the word but I've become less tolerant of stupidity. I have yelled at people flying through neighborhoods with lots of kids. Texting while stopping on the wrong side of the crosswalk etc. So considering I never was picky about tatoos or smoking weed or what kind of diet you're on or whether your a sahm or a professional or how your kids are educated, then I guess that makes me more judgemental.

[kewb]

I am definitely less judgey. At least outwardly. I cans still go on a bender with a bestie but I try not to.

 

Having spent the last 8 years dealing with my sick and now disabled husband has been a humbling experience.

 

I have learned to understand that we are all pretty much doing the best we can with the tools we have available. Overcoming negative experiences from our youth is challenging and if the experiences are invisible you are on your own.

 

I try to remember in every interaction that the person I am dealing with did not wake up asking themselves how they can make my life difficult today. Most of the time I am successful.

[kiwik]

I think more. I just don't have the patience to deal with self induced drama or justifying what seem to me to be very selfish or irresponsible acts. I am also less outspoken and far less likely to point out to someone that what they are doing could be or is a problem. I am far mor able to shrug and move on "not my monkey, not my circus". I no longer have any desire to argue politics etc either though I will discuss with friends in a non heated way.

[Ausmumof3]

Much less.

 

Except in spelling...it's JUDGMENTAL. Drop the silent e when you add the suffix on this one!

Only if you are American...

[linders]

As the years go by, I have found myself more inclined to think "there might be more to the story" and therefore to judge less harshly. I used to be more black and white.

 

 

[creekland]

Ok, I got a little harsh with kids in my class yesterday (juniors and seniors) who were making jokes about a student who was called out of class for a therapy session.  Maybe very harsh, but in a teaching way - not punitive.  Perhaps that means more judgmental on my part as my younger self wouldn't have cared... but my goal was to make them less judgmental so I'm not sure how that counts.

 

FWIW, the class - a notoriously bad one behaviorally that I had been warned about ahead of time - behaved perfectly afterward.

 

Sometimes I think people just need to explain things fully - let them see what's going on - help it make sense to them (in this case, asking them if they'd have made fun of her if she were going to a chemo session or needed insulin for diabetes - then letting them know that mental situations aren't really different, and continuing on to say their parents/grandparents generations didn't know that mental illnesses are physical, but their generation should, so I really expect them to "right" the wrongs that have happened in the past).

 

But I've no idea if it will stop when I'm not there (aka, next time it happens).

 

And what's with this calling a high school kid out of class for a therapy session anyway.  Could it not have been arranged ahead of time so the poor gal didn't need to be embarrassed???  :cursing:

 

But I digress.  There are definitely times I'm more judgmental - or as others have said - more vocal about it, especially when I can hope to open minds - even one.

[Pawz4me]

I've become more judgmental of lack of basic common sense, willful ignorance and selfish behavior.

 

I've become less judgmental in that I realize more and more that my idea/definition of/perception of what constitutes the above isn't necessarily the same as someone else's. 

[MeghansMom]

I think more and more in shades of grey, however I have become increasingly grumpy.

[FloridaLisa]

So much less. I don't think I realized how judgmental I was until my heart broke into a thousand pieces. Just asked God to go ahead and clean it out since it was already broken open and I saw so much yuck. I would not have classified myself as judgmental. But there it was. 

[MotherGoose]

I don't say things out loud to people I don't know. I am kind to people even if I don't agree with them. I don't argue with people. I don't post rants on Facebook. But I do have very clear ideas about right and wrong that I did not have when I was young. I teach my children that x is morally wrong, very clearly, instead of saying, well, you know, everyone gets to choose their own behaviors and whatever works. I do delineate, where age appropriate, about things that are legal rights and things that I think are wrong morally, even if they are legal. So I don't know if that makes me judgemental or just mature and confident of my beliefs. I'm sure I called my parents judgemental when I was a teenager and they told me things were wrong, or to not hang out with certain people because of things they did. I have come to understand that they were correct in their judgements though.

 

ETA and to avoid becoming a judgy old person, well, I'll take another lesson from my parents: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. Obviously this doesn't apply to real problems and that you should become a doormat, but it does cut out complaining about things about which you have no control and gossip. Not to say you can't talk about controversial topics Iike politics, or a relatives bad behavior, but it stops becoming a gossip or constant negativity.

Edited November 12, 2017 by MotherGoose