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Therapist Question


rainbowmama
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I see a therapist who, among other things, diagnosed me with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder because I kept checking a certain child, convinced that something was wrong with this child after taking this kid to his doctor and a specialist. She referred me to a psychiatrist for medication and told me that if I didn't stop checking, she would recommend hospitalization. I took him back to the doctor again anyway, and that thing I kept checking and couldn't let go? It apparently wasn't all in my head. There is something wrong: no matter what my kid will need surgery and there's testing to see if it's something even more serious. With so many questions about my kid's health still, I am still really struggling with anxiety and would really like help. I am not sure, though, whether I should continue to see this therapist: I oscillate between thinking there's no way this therapist could have known there was something actually wrong on one hand and with how glad I am that I didn't let this go on the other. I have not seen the therapist again since the most recent doctor visit. So... should I fire my therapist? 

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I don't think you need to "fire" the therapist -- they haven't done anything wrong, really. However I think it's s great time for you to go ahead and wrap up your current therapy relationship and start fresh with someone else. I think it would be an advantage to not have that history between you and someone working for your health.

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I don't think you need to "fire" the therapist -- they haven't done anything wrong, really. However I think it's s great time for you to go ahead and wrap up your current therapy relationship and start fresh with someone else. I think it would be an advantage to not have that history between you and someone working for your health.

 

That sounds like a good idea to me too. Unless there is some reason you want to keep this therapist. 

 

Do you think you were misdiagnosed with OCD under the circumstances, or is that also true? 

 

If it's regular anxiety, and not also OCD, it will be easier to find a replacement, a CBT. If it's truly OCD, you need someone who does that specifically, not just regular CBT. 

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What stood out to me is that your therapist considered recommending *hospitalization* for you, based on her *assumption* that your child was ok. She seemed to think that she was right and you were wrong. She did not believe there was any truth in your concerns. That is not a therapist I would want to confide in or trust. What would have happened if you had agreed to hospitalization?

 

My personal preference, if medication is recommended, is to get treatment from the person prescribing the medication, if at all possible. YMMV. In any case, someone whose practice focuses on whatever you need help for.

Edited by Alessandra
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I would “fire†the therapist in this situation.

 

Especially if the OCD diagnosis is based solely on your worry about your one child and not a compound of behaviors. In fact, I might look in to reporting her to her licensing board. I would also write a strongly worded “firing†letter basically advising said therapist to seek medical attention in removing her cranium from her own sphincter ani externus.

 

It makes me angry in your behalf that you are questioning your own intuition on this subject! If it were your child’s therapist who had misguided them and basically had them questioning their own intuition and sanity would you take your child back to them? Please advocate for yourself before this woman does more damage.

Edited by fraidycat
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 I would seek out the (or a) psychiatrist. I have seen a few therapists, but the ones that do talk therapy (at least the ones I've dealt with) are not the ones that write scripts and vice versa. I now see a psychiatrist and he gave me lexapro for my anxiety and depression. I have been taking it a few months now and I have a lot less anxiety. It really helped with the depression as well. So, if you are looking for a medication I would seek out a psychiatrist. If not the one she recommended, then another one.

 

I am not saying stop talk therapy, but if you are seeking something for your anxiety I would pursue a psychiatrist. I'm under the impression you have not seen the psychiatrist yet? And depending on the expertise of your therapist, I don't know if they are as good at diagnosing.

 

Personally, I think I would let my therapist go and also inform her that there was something wrong with my child. But I'm not sure if I would ever have a chance to follow up or if I would just stop going.

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 I would seek out the (or a) psychiatrist. I have seen a few therapists, but the ones that do talk therapy (at least the ones I've dealt with) are not the ones that write scripts and vice versa. I now see a psychiatrist and he gave me lexapro for my anxiety and depression. I have been taking it a few months now and I have a lot less anxiety. It really helped with the depression as well. So, if you are looking for a medication I would seek out a psychiatrist. If not the one she recommended, then another one.

 

I am not saying stop talk therapy, but if you are seeking something for your anxiety I would pursue a psychiatrist. I'm under the impression you have not seen the psychiatrist yet? And depending on the expertise of your therapist, I don't know if they are as good at diagnosing.

 

Personally, I think I would let my therapist go and also inform her that there was something wrong with my child. But I'm not sure if I would ever have a chance to follow up or if I would just stop going.

 

I agree totally with the above.

 

If your anxiety has been ongoing for awhile you may need medication. Long term anxiety messes up the balance of neurotransmitters your brain needs to function well (serotonin, dopamine, GABA, etc.). A short course of medication (six months or so) can help tremendously with that. 

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That sounds like a good idea to me too. Unless there is some reason you want to keep this therapist. 

 

Do you think you were misdiagnosed with OCD under the circumstances, or is that also true? 

 

If it's regular anxiety, and not also OCD, it will be easier to find a replacement, a CBT. If it's truly OCD, you need someone who does that specifically, not just regular CBT. 

 

As far as I know, it was based solely on checking this kid, so I believe she misdiagnosed me

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I'd find a new therapist.

 

I would also consider reporting this therapist to her licensing board. What you describe does not sound like OCD, and to threaten hospitalization for OCD is just strange. Hospitalization is generally considered when there is serious risk of harm to self or others.

Edited by maize
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Honestly, if you're not liking the therapist, find another. You can see a psychiatrist for both issues, or a therapist for counselling and a psychiatrist for medication.

 

There isn't a good psychiatrist in our immediate area, but we have a long-term therapist that we're very happy with. So we drive much further for medication management, but it's only every few months.

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I'd find another therapist and not see a psychiatrist if you have no interest in medication. Your current therapist may believe she's right even if you told her there is something wrong with your son and it may color how she interacts with you. Hospitalization doesn't make sense in this case. 

 

If you find a new therapist, tell her/him that you are experiencing anxiety over the fact that something is wrong with your son. Keep the first therapist's idea of your having OCD to yourself. Let the new therapist get to know you and decide how to help you.

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What do you mean by checking? Do you mean doctor appointments?

 

This is a small child that I still help bathe. I've been checking the kid at bath time. Occasionally, my husband and I would both check at night while he slept, so we could discuss it. At first, my husband could not feel what I felt, and then, as it got worse, we couldn't agree on what we felt.

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My baby has a soft lump on the back of his neck on one side; it appeared sometime between 3 and 4 months, I took him to the doctor, we watched it for a month, the doctor sent him for an ultrasound which showed nothing concerning. I check on that lump regularly because it is an oddity in my child and I want to keep an eye on it. I will continue having the pediatrician check on it and would absolutely take him to another doctor if I wasn't completely comfortable with that doctor's diagnosis and approach.

 

I do not have OCD or any symptoms of OCD.

Edited by maize
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I'd find a new therapist.

 

I would also consider reporting this therapist to her licensing board. What you describe does not sound like OCD, and to threaten hospitalization for OCD is just strange. Hospitalization is generally considered when there is serious risk of harm to self or others.

 

My therapist told me that checking my child and taking him to doctors to check him hurts him, teaching him to believe there is something wrong with himself. I think that's where the risk of harm came in. 

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My therapist told me that checking my child and taking him to doctors to check him hurts him, teaching him to believe there is something wrong with himself. I think that's where the risk of harm came in.

Maybe the therapist told you you had OCD but really thought you had Munchausen by proxy?

 

 

https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/tc/munchausen-syndrome-by-proxy-topic-overview

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Re: the anxiety--find yourself a therapist who focuses on cognitive behavior therapy. Medication really can help, as can the big three of good nutrition, healthy sleep, and regular exercise.

 

Addressing your anxiety will make you better able to help your child.

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Yeah, I'd fire her.  She threatened to have you hospitalized.  Because your mom gut said your kid was ill.  Unless you were forcing some sort of medicine or invasive procedures or isolation on your child, mom gut is not a mental illness.  :/  That is my unscientific perspective.

 

Further, given that this person was clearly wrong, she may be defensive about her mistake and this might mean baggage going into your future work together.  I agree that a clean break and fresh start would probably serve you better.

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