Do we do what is best for me or what she wants? (class related) MINOR UPDATE in original post (class length)

[Kassia]

UPDATE:  I made a small error.  The T/R 5:30pm class is 2 hours and 15 minutes and not 2 1/2 hours.  I assume it goes for about an hour, short break, and then another hour.  The MWF classes are 90 minutes.  So, the TR class is probably about 30 mins longer.  

 

 

 

 

Dd15 wants to take Calculus for DE in the spring at the community college (30 minute drive each way for me since she can't drive yet).  There are three sections available:

 

8am - great professor, three days/week

 

9:30am - bad professor, three days/week

 

5:30pm - unknown professor with great, but few reviews, two days/week but a long class

 

 

 

Dd wants to take the 8am class.  But it will be winter for much of the semester and we live in the snow belt and the drive to the community college is very tough (all hills and curvy roads) when the weather is bad.  The CC is known for rarely closing and, even if they did, I don't know if they'd announce the closing before we had to leave to make it to class in time.  And, selfishly, I have to drive her and leaving at that time would mean I'd miss my daily run.  I run every single morning and have for the past 20 years - it's really important to me.  We'd be leaving around 7:15am when the weather is good.  If the weather is bad, we'd have to leave much earlier and shovel beforehand.  

 

 

The 5:30pm class is more convenient for me plus DH could help out with the driving - especially in bad weather (he's much more comfortable in the snow than I am).  Also, driving twice a week vs. three times a week would save us over an hour of driving time each week plus gas, etc.  And I could get my run in with no problem.   If there is a school cancellation, we'd definitely know before we left for class.  But dd is hesitant to take such a long class (2 1/2 hours long with a short break) and I know she would prefer the 8am class with the professor she knows is great.  

 

If the instructor for the 9:30am class was good, we would just do that.  But that's not happening.  

 

I don't know what to do.  This feels like a huge decision.  :(  

Edited October 6, 2017 by Kassia

[regentrude]

I would not have a 15 y/o take a calc class with a professor who has a bad reputation. So the 9:30am is out of the question for me.

I would also not entertain the notion of a 5:30pm math class that last 2.5 hours, ever. 2.5 hour evening classes when instructor and students are tired are not an effective way to teach math.

 

This means, the real decision for me would be between making the 8am class happen or her not taking calculus that semester at all.

Would she be willing to get up that early?

Could you perhaps run while she is in class and while you are waiting to drive her back home?

 

ETA: You can make a deal: she needs to take care of any shoveling that is necessary before class. 

 

 

 

 

Edited October 5, 2017 by regentrude

[Arcadia]

No online option for the same class? A friend use Uber to get her kids to dual enrollment classes but roads here are easy to drive even in winter and we are in a flat city. So relying on Uber isn’t scary, driving conditions wise.

[regentrude]

Is there an option to take calculus elsewhere?

Could she take an online class? or self study with a tutor?

[FriedClams]

With those options I'd look at thinkwell. They offer AP calculus AB and BC, and a tutor if necessary.

[Bambam]

I'd take her to the 8 am class. I would use the time she was in class to do my run there on campus. 

This is for one semester, and it is a good class with a good professor (so important). So, I'd do it.

 

But, it has been years since we've lived anywhere with snow/ice. Could she take the same class during the fall semester next year? Or would that mess up her order of classes? She seems young to be taking Calculus. 

[xixstar]

I would only consider the 8am class. Long classes are hard enough without adding calculus in the equation. So either that class or no class.

 

Most places have policy to announce delays or closing by a specific time and 8am classes would be factored into that decision policy, I would assume.

[EKS]

Agreeing with the others--8 am class or nothing.

[Kalmia]

I agree with Regentrude. Run at 8 am while she's in class. Some community colleges have tracks or running trails.

[Zebra]

I'd have her take the 530 one.

 

I have been thinking about this type of situation a lot lately with my teen.   She is taking a extracurricular class that is KILLING ME.   I went along with it to be the super-nice-awesome-perfect-homeschooling mom.   It's kicking my butt, I'm PO'd and resentful every week, and I should not have done it.  And it hit me, that she would have LIVED ANOTHER DAY if she had to take the "other" class.   She would have saved me an enormous amount of stress, and she would have gained just a little stress in return.  I should not be killing myself bending over backwards to create the perfect situation for her.   It's my job to teach her to become an adult, and how to have relationships with other adults who do not play the role of doormat.   This is all me, she wasn't complaining about it or anything like that.  I took it upon myself.   

 

The 530 one would be much easier for you.   You're still taking her to the class, and you don't seem to have any reason to think the teacher is horrible.  I guess I don't see the down side, other than it would not be the "perfect/ideal" situation for dd.

 

I don't know about her being ready for this class, and that's a different issue.  

[Kassia]

Thank you so much!  

 

 

I would not have a 15 y/o take a calc class with a professor who has a bad reputation. So the 9:30am is out of the question for me.

I would also not entertain the notion of a 5:30pm math class that last 2.5 hours, ever. 2.5 hour evening classes when instructor and students are tired are not an effective way to teach math.

 

This means, the real decision for me would be between making the 8am class happen or her not taking calculus that semester at all.

Would she be willing to get up that early?

Could you perhaps run while she is in class and while you are waiting to drive her back home?

 

ETA: You can make a deal: she needs to take care of any shoveling that is necessary before class. 

 

She is definitely willing to get up that early.  She wants to take the class.  I don't think I could run while she's in class, though - there is no safe area on campus that I know of to run.  

 

 

 

No online option for the same class? A friend use Uber to get her kids to dual enrollment classes but roads here are easy to drive even in winter and we are in a flat city. So relying on Uber isn’t scary, driving conditions wise.

 

No online option for calculus.  She's taking trigonometry online this semester.  

 

 

Is there an option to take calculus elsewhere?

Could she take an online class? or self study with a tutor?

 

I don't know of another DE calculus class that she could take.  

 

 

With those options I'd look at thinkwell. They offer AP calculus AB and BC, and a tutor if necessary.

 

I thought of Thinkwell, but that's a one year class (I assume) so then she'd be off by a semester.  I should take a look.  She used Thinkwell for Algebra 2 and loved it.  Is Thinkwell calculus a full class on its own?

 

 

 

I'd take her to the 8 am class. I would use the time she was in class to do my run there on campus. 

This is for one semester, and it is a good class with a good professor (so important). So, I'd do it.

 

But, it has been years since we've lived anywhere with snow/ice. Could she take the same class during the fall semester next year? Or would that mess up her order of classes? She seems young to be taking Calculus. 

 

She could take the class next fall with a good professor (her trig professor who she has now and loves, actually), but her trig professor wasn't thrilled with her taking such a long break (8 months) between trigonometry and calculus.  

 

 

I would only consider the 8am class. Long classes are hard enough without adding calculus in the equation. So either that class or no class.

Most places have policy to announce delays or closing by a specific time and 8am classes would be factored into that decision policy, I would assume.

 

This college is really bad about closing.  Last year, they only closed after every road to the college was closed due to accidents.   :mad:

 

 

 

 

 

I agree with Regentrude. Run at 8 am while she's in class. Some community colleges have tracks or running trails.

 

This one doesn't (it's pretty small), but I'd have to figure that out.  The big issue is the weather and road conditions.  But missing running would make me anxious, tbh.  

 

 

[Kassia]

I'd have her take the 530 one.

 

I have been thinking about this type of situation a lot lately with my teen.   She is taking a extracurricular class that is KILLING ME.   I went along with it to be the super-nice-awesome-perfect-homeschooling mom.   It's kicking my butt, I'm PO'd and resentful every week, and I should not have done it.  And it hit me, that she would have LIVED ANOTHER DAY if she had to take the "other" class.   She would have saved me an enormous amount of stress, and she would have gained just a little stress in return.  I should not be killing myself bending over backwards to create the perfect situation for her.   It's my job to teach her to become an adult, and how to have relationships with other adults who do not play the role of doormat.   This is all me, she wasn't complaining about it or anything like that.  I took it upon myself.   

 

The 530 one would be much easier for you.   You're still taking her to the class, and you don't seem to have any reason to think the teacher is horrible.  I guess I don't see the down side, other than it would not be the "perfect/ideal" situation for dd.

 

I don't know about her being ready for this class, and that's a different issue.  

 

I'm sorry that you are going through this with your teen!  DE has been really hard on me with all the driving/waiting around, but I know dd feels bad about it so I try not to let it show because I don't want her to feel guilty.  Yesterday she wanted to meet with two professors during their office hours and we ended up on campus an extra 90 minutes that I hadn't planned on.  I didn't bring anything extra to do plus I was hungry and thirsty!  Stuff like this happens frequently.  One more year until she can drive is what I keep telling myself!  I

 

It's hard on us moms at time to find the right balance to do what is best for our kids without making the sacrifices too difficult on ourselves.  

[City Mouse]

I will be the one opposing view. I would do the 5:30 class or have her wait a semester. At 15ys old waiting one semester for calculus is not going to have much long term impact. Even if you don't want to do a full math course at home, sh could just do some review to keep her skills up.

[wonderchica]

I would figure out an alternate time to run. It might not be easy, but it's extremely rare for people to have the ability to keep the exact same routine for 20 years. You can readjust to your preferred time after the semester is done.

[Arcadia]

I thought of Thinkwell, but that's a one year class (I assume) so then she'd be off by a semester.

Thinkwell calculus is self paced and a one year subscription. She can go as fast or as slow as she wants to.

http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/ap-calculus-bc

[Lang Syne Boardie]

Have you checked the cc town for gyms? YMCA, anytime fitness, someplace with a treadmill? 

 

Traveling with food and drinks to kid activities is part of our lives, lots of us...and the teen years are the hardest by far, because their activities are far away AND many hours. I totally feel your pain. I'm in this era, too, supporting teens and commuter college students.

 

I would get her to the 8 am class, and figure out what to do for my own comfort while she's there. There must be a treadmill somewhere in town, and you can pack a cooler, a blanket and pillow, your phone, whatever you need to be comfortable while you wait.

[Pen]

I'm also on the 5:30  side.  I think there might be a lot of pressure to drive on days where the driving might not be safe.  And a lot of stress around that even if no accident happened.  

 

I think you might be able to find somewhere to run near where she needs to be even if it meant dropping her off and driving to a nice running area, but also for health reasons I don't think your giving up run if not possible to find an option makes sense.  

 

Could she self study some calculus between trig and when her trig prof has calculus so as not to have a long time away from math, but also to have a good teacher and a time that is more healthy for you.

 

[Kassia]

I would figure out an alternate time to run. It might not be easy, but it's extremely rare for people to have the ability to keep the exact same routine for 20 years. You can readjust to your preferred time after the semester is done.

 

I have run at different times over the past 20 years, but now that I'm older it seems harder for me to change my schedule - I have bladder issues, digestion issues, can't deal with direct sunlight, etc. which makes it easiest for me to run right when I get up in the morning.  BUT - I know that doing what is best for dd for one semester out of my life is more important even though I'm addicted to exercise and it helps me with my anxiety.  

 

 

 

Thinkwell calculus is self paced and a one year subscription. She can go as fast or as slow as she wants to.

http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/ap-calculus-bc

 

That's an interesting option if she could do it from January to August and then start Calc 2 in the fall.  Do you know if it's a full course on its own or if it's a supplement?  Dd loved Thinkwell for Algebra 2 and learned a lot.  She wouldn't be ready to take the AP test in May so I would have to check with the math dept. to see if they would allow her to move right to Calc 2.

 

 

Have you checked the cc town for gyms? YMCA, anytime fitness, someplace with a treadmill? 

 

Traveling with food and drinks to kid activities is part of our lives, lots of us...and the teen years are the hardest by far, because their activities are far away AND many hours. I totally feel your pain. I'm in this era, too, supporting teens and commuter college students.

 

I would get her to the 8 am class, and figure out what to do for my own comfort while she's there. There must be a treadmill somewhere in town, and you can pack a cooler, a blanket and pillow, your phone, whatever you need to be comfortable while you wait.

 

 

I actually use a gym now for weight training while she's in class.  I can't run on a treadmill because it gives me motion sickness.  Or at least it used to - maybe I could try it again.  

Edited October 5, 2017 by Kassia

[TechWife]

Set her up for success. She has a good reason for wanting to take the early class from a college students perspective. I think you need to honor that.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

I have run at different times over the past 20 years, but now that I'm older it seems harder for me to change my schedule - I have bladder issues, digestion issues, can't deal with direct sunlight, etc. which makes it easiest for me to run right when I get up in the morning.  BUT - I know that doing what is best for dd for one semester out of my life is more important even though I'm addicted to exercise and it helps me with my anxiety.  

 

 

 

 

That's an interesting option if she could do it from January to August and then start Calc 2 in the fall.  Do you know if it's a full course on its own or if it's a supplement?  Dd loved Thinkwell for Algebra 2 and learned a lot.  

 

 

 

 

I actually use a gym now for weight training while she's in class.  I can't run on a treadmill because it gives me motion sickness.  Or at least it used to - maybe I could try it again.  

 

 

I think dd should go to class but that doesn't necessarily mean you have to be the one to do it. I don't imagine your dd would like to think of herself as causing you motion sickness, anxiety, or deprivation in any way.

 

Can you dip into savings for a taxi, or research carpool options? I'd say Uber, but they don't take unaccompanied minors.

 

I know taxis cost a million dollars but something, somewhere will have to give...we've all got either health, or time, or money, or some combination. If not, maybe dd can't take this class. :(

[bethben]

Different question.  What is she going to do for math for the remainder of her high school years?  Could she take a pre-calc at the college to spread out her math experience a bit or is she wanting to do a ton more math at the community college?  If she is going into a math related career, you have to be careful to know if those credits are going to transfer.  I have a friend who's son took 3 levels of calculus at the community college because he wants to go into engineering.  Now, the college he wants to go to will not accept those credits because they want all classes going toward a major to be taken at their college.  So, were all those calculus classes wasted?  Maybe/ maybe not depending upon how you look at it.  

 

My ds took classes at the community college starting at 8 am.  I was homeschooling two other kids so I couldn't have driven him to the classes.  Thankfully, my dh works a mile away from the CC so that's how it worked for us.  

Edited October 5, 2017 by bethben

[Arcadia]

That's an interesting option if she could do it from January to August and then start Calc 2 in the fall. Do you know if it's a full course on its own or if it's a supplement?

The Thinkwell homeschool version is a full course. Calc 1 is approximately Calculus AB and Calc 2 is approximately Calculus BC but the community colleges here tend to use custom editions of the Stewart, Single Variable Calculus: Early Transcendentals book.

 

This link is for the Thinkwell calculus AB course http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/ap-calculus-ab

 

ETA:

You might want to look at this option instead

 

“Thinkwell's Calculus covers both Calculus I and Calculus II, each of which is a one-semester course in college.†http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/calculus

Edited October 6, 2017 by Arcadia

[Tree Frog]

It's really easy as moms to discount things that are important to us, to see what others want as more important. My sister runs and I have see her when she's not able to run. For her, it's a release, how she starts the day, and sets everything right. We shouldn't need to devalue the OP's needs when there's a suitable option.

 

I would do the 5:30 class or wait a semester. Driving on curvy, winding roads on a dark morning when I may need to turn around and drive straight back home again because class was canceled wouldn't be worth it to me. It's ok for the daughter to be inconvenienced and not get the class she would prefer this semester. 

[Jyhwkmama]

It's really easy as moms to discount things that are important to us, to see what others want as more important. My sister runs and I have see her when she's not able to run. For her, it's a release, how she starts the day, and sets everything right. We shouldn't need to devalue the OP's needs when there's a suitable option.

 

I would do the 5:30 class or wait a semester. Driving on curvy, winding roads on a dark morning when I may need to turn around and drive straight back home again because class was canceled wouldn't be worth it to me. It's ok for the daughter to be inconvenienced and not get the class she would prefer this semester. 

 

 

Completely agree with this!

[2squared]

I wouldn't expect the evening drive to be any better than the morning. Where I live, its completely dark at 5:00 so both directions of the drive would be at night. The morning drive would be at sunrise with light by the time of arrival and complete daylight for the return trip. Our plows are out for morning and evening rush hours, so I would expect clearer roads in the morning than in the night time return trip.

 

I hate driving in the dark in the winter, so I would pick the morning class and figure out the run. I would bet the cc has a gym too run in or even around the hallways.

[Guest]

I'd push for the 5:30 class.

[Pen]

I wouldn't expect the evening drive to be any better than the morning. Where I live, its completely dark at 5:00 so both directions of the drive would be at night. The morning drive would be at sunrise with light by the time of arrival and complete daylight for the return trip. Our plows are out for morning and evening rush hours, so I would expect clearer roads in the morning than in the night time return trip.

 

I hate driving in the dark in the winter, so I would pick the morning class and figure out the run. I would bet the cc has a gym too run in or even around the hallways.

 

 

Where I am roads usually are more clear later on.  We often have black ice in early AM that has melted by later on.

 

But in any case, OP says her dh who is less phased by snow etc., can help drive at 5:30.

[Kassia]

I think dd should go to class but that doesn't necessarily mean you have to be the one to do it. I don't imagine your dd would like to think of herself as causing you motion sickness, anxiety, or deprivation in any way.

 

Can you dip into savings for a taxi, or research carpool options? I'd say Uber, but they don't take unaccompanied minors.

 

I know taxis cost a million dollars but something, somewhere will have to give...we've all got either health, or time, or money, or some combination. If not, maybe dd can't take this class. :(

 

 

We live in a semi-rural area and I've never even seen a taxi here!  Carpooling may be an option -  I could look into that.  

 

 

 

 

Different question.  What is she going to do for math for the remainder of her high school years?  Could she take a pre-calc at the college to spread out her math experience a bit or is she wanting to do a ton more math at the community college?  If she is going into a math related career, you have to be careful to know if those credits are going to transfer.  I have a friend who's son took 3 levels of calculus at the community college because he wants to go into engineering.  Now, the college he wants to go to will not accept those credits because they want all classes going toward a major to be taken at their college.  So, were all those calculus classes wasted?  Maybe/ maybe not depending upon how you look at it.  

 

 

 

She wants to take as many math courses at the CC as possible.  She is thinking about majoring in math in college, but not sure yet.  One of her brothers took all of the CC courses as a DE student and then went to a university as an engineering student and all of his math classes transferred.  I don't care about the transfer credits, but the CC has some excellent math professors with small classes and I think dd would have a great experience taking upper level math classes there.  The trig she is taking now is the last class before calculus.  

 

 

 

The Thinkwell homeschool version is a full course. Calc 1 is approximately Calculus AB and Calc 2 is approximately Calculus BC but the community colleges here tend to use custom editions of the Stewart, Single Variable Calculus: Early Transcendentals book.

 

This link is for the Thinkwell calculus AB course http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/ap-calculus-ab

 

ETA:

You might want to look at this option instead

 

“Thinkwell's Calculus covers both Calculus I and Calculus II, each of which is a one-semester course in college.†http://www.thinkwellhomeschool.com/products/calculus

 

Thank you!  If we were to do this, I'd have to check with the CC and ask if they would allow her to take an end of course exam or some kind of placement test so she wouldn't have to repeat any calculus there.  It would be much cheaper and easier for sure.

 

 

 

 

 

It's really easy as moms to discount things that are important to us, to see what others want as more important. My sister runs and I have see her when she's not able to run. For her, it's a release, how she starts the day, and sets everything right. We shouldn't need to devalue the OP's needs when there's a suitable option.

 

I would do the 5:30 class or wait a semester. Driving on curvy, winding roads on a dark morning when I may need to turn around and drive straight back home again because class was canceled wouldn't be worth it to me. It's ok for the daughter to be inconvenienced and not get the class she would prefer this semester. 

 

Yes!  What you wrote about your sister and her morning run is exactly how I feel!  DH bought me a shirt years ago that says, "It's ok.  I ran today."  And that's exactly how I feel.  If I get my run in, I can handle pretty much whatever else is thrown at me for the day!  But I still couldn't let that be the only reason I turned down the 8am class - I would feel too guilty!  

 

 

 

 

 

I wouldn't expect the evening drive to be any better than the morning. Where I live, its completely dark at 5:00 so both directions of the drive would be at night. The morning drive would be at sunrise with light by the time of arrival and complete daylight for the return trip. Our plows are out for morning and evening rush hours, so I would expect clearer roads in the morning than in the night time return trip.

 

I hate driving in the dark in the winter, so I would pick the morning class and figure out the run. I would bet the cc has a gym too run in or even around the hallways.

 

 

Yes, I thought of the fact that it will be dark in both directions in the evening.  But the roads will be much more traveled by that time and they should be better than first thing in the morning.  And DH can help with the driving more in the evening.  

[kiwik]

I will be the one opposing view. I would do the 5:30 class or have her wait a semester. At 15ys old waiting one semester for calculus is not going to have much long term impact. Even if you don't want to do a full math course at home, sh could just do some review to keep her skills up.

I would do the 5.30 class too. I did most of my high school education via 5.30 to 7.30/8 pm classes. Of course I am not a morning person and hated 8 am classes at university. Everyone was still a bit dopey including the lecturer and it was hard for me to concentrate. 5.30 to 8 twice a week sounds good to me.

 

Eta. Giving up your run sounds like a little thing but I assume it is an important thing to you and you should keep it unless there is only one option.

Edited October 6, 2017 by kiwik

[OneStepAtATime]

Frankly, none of those options sound great to me.  

 

1. 8am class.  Have to leave by 7:15am on a good day with no weather issues?  Have to leave earlier if the weather is going to slow you down and you may not know ahead of time if the school will close because of bad weather? The class meets 3 times a week so three times a week you are driving very early on potentially ice/snowy roads and I assume at least part of the season would be in the dark.  You would not get to jog, or at least it would be challenging to find a time/location to jog, which would probably affect your mood and attitude.  That should be taken into account.  Your own health (mental and physical) should definitely be taken into account.  The bigger concern for me would be safety, though.  Roads would almost certainly not be cleared before you had to head to the school.

 

2.  9:30am - bad professor?  Nope. Wouldn't do it.

 

3.  5:30pm twice a week sounded pretty good right up until you said 2 1/2 hours.  2 1/2 hours for math class is a REALLY long math class.  Can she actually stay focused and engaged for that long with that subject that late in the day?  I totally get not wanting to deal with the 8:00am class and the 9:30am class is definitely a no from my perspective.  I would seriously reconsider that long a class for math, especially with an unknown professor, unless you were rock solid certain she could handle it.  And the other consideration is you would be driving her back in the dark on icy/snowy roads. 

 

4. I would seriously look at other options first.  You have some time to really do the research, right?  Like really dig in and try to find other options?  If you genuinely cannot find a better option then I would go for the 5:30pm course but I would want to make sure I had exhausted other options first.  There must be self-paced on-line options for Calculus or on-line through some sort of one semester on-line live teacher offering somewhere.  Or a tutor meeting with her once a week using a calculus text?  Or something else?  How solidly have you looked?

[EKS]

How about having her run through Derek Owens calculus in a semester (that would be college pacing) and then having her take the DE class next semester?  That way if the instructor isn't ideal, it won't be a big deal.

[ikslo]

I can't help but think your title should read:

 

Do what I want or what is best for her?

[Kassia]

 

3.  5:30pm twice a week sounded pretty good right up until you said 2 1/2 hours.  2 1/2 hours for math class is a REALLY long math class.  Can she actually stay focused and engaged for that long with that subject that late in the day?  I totally get not wanting to deal with the 8:00am class and the 9:30am class is definitely a no from my perspective.  I would seriously reconsider that long a class for math, especially with an unknown professor, unless you were rock solid certain she could handle it.  And the other consideration is you would be driving her back in the dark on icy/snowy roads. 

 

4. I would seriously look at other options first.  You have some time to really do the research, right?  Like really dig in and try to find other options?  If you genuinely cannot find a better option then I would go for the 5:30pm course but I would want to make sure I had exhausted other options first.  There must be self-paced on-line options for Calculus or on-line through some sort of one semester on-line live teacher offering somewhere.  Or a tutor meeting with her once a week using a calculus text?  Or something else?  How solidly have you looked?

 

I'm assuming the 2 1/2 hour class would have a break in the middle for 15 minutes or so.  Still, it's a long time to focus on math.  OTOH, I think they do block scheduling in some B&M schools and that would be similar?  

 

I haven't looked at other options yet.  Up until yesterday, we thought the 9:30am class was being taught by the trigonometry professor she has now and we love him.  So there was no issue at all.  Registration for spring is going on now and I don't think the classes will fill up, but they could so I feel like we have to make a decision soon if she's going to take a class at the CC.  

[Kassia]

I can't help but think your title should read:

 

Do what I want or what is best for her?

 

I would definitely sacrifice my run for the perfect class/professor, but the weather is a big issue for me.  Last spring semester, she had an 11am class twice a week so I had daylight in both directions and the roads were usually good.  We live in the snowbelt where there is lake-effect snow and the roads can get very bad and I'm scared to drive when it's like that.  

[Tammi K]

Lots of people above had really good comments about taking the 8:00 class.  So, I'll just add that classes are usually only 15 weeks. It's a pretty brief period of time in the grand scheme of things.  If this works for your daughter academically and helps her toward her long term goals, I would consider it a few weeks well spent.

[Starr]

It will still be better than next term. There aren’t as many snow storms in Nov/Dec as there are later. But the dark is a drag. Is there a gym at the school where you could run?

[Janeway]

Dd15 wants to take Calculus for DE in the spring at the community college (30 minute drive each way for me since she can't drive yet). There are three sections available:

 

8am - great professor, three days/week

 

9:30am - bad professor, three days/week

 

5:30pm - unknown professor with great, but few reviews, two days/week but a long class

 

 

 

Dd wants to take the 8am class. But it will be winter for much of the semester and we live in the snow belt and the drive to the community college is very tough (all hills and curvy roads) when the weather is bad. The CC is known for rarely closing and, even if they did, I don't know if they'd announce the closing before we had to leave to make it to class in time. And, selfishly, I have to drive her and leaving at that time would mean I'd miss my daily run. I run every single morning and have for the past 20 years - it's really important to me. We'd be leaving around 7:15am when the weather is good. If the weather is bad, we'd have to leave much earlier and shovel beforehand.

 

 

The 5:30pm class is more convenient for me plus DH could help out with the driving - especially in bad weather (he's much more comfortable in the snow than I am). Also, driving twice a week vs. three times a week would save us over an hour of driving time each week plus gas, etc. And I could get my run in with no problem. If there is a school cancellation, we'd definitely know before we left for class. But dd is hesitant to take such a long class (2 1/2 hours long with a short break) and I know she would prefer the 8am class with the professor she knows is great.

 

If the instructor for the 9:30am class was good, we would just do that. But that's not happening.

 

I don't know what to do. This feels like a huge decision. :(

she needs to take the 5:30pm class or take it online or wait a semester to take the class when the schedule is better.

[AnniePoo]

Don't skip or change the run. Your preferences are important too.

[foxbridgeacademy]

There's no way either of mine could do a 2.5 hour class so it would be the 8am class or wait until next semester.  Since there's no way I could do the 8am class kiddo would have to wait.  I'd have them spend the time doing Thinkwell as a prep for the DE class so that it would make getting an A more likely. The only way I'd do just Thinkwell is if they don't need Calculus for College credit. 

[Liz CA]

Have you checked it there is someone else going to the CC at that time with whom you could carpool?

 

[kroe1]

I would have my kiddo do the online version from Liberty University.

[Twolittleboys]

If it was just about convenience I would take her to the 8 am class. However, I am a very insecure driver and the thought of driving in the early morning in snow in hilly terrain is more than I could bear.

 

So I would skip this semester and let her take calculus later on when the weather is better (and the schedule might be better as well). In the meantime I would either have her take some other math class, work on trig, or do some other prep work for calculus (possibly online).

[bettyandbob]

I'd have her do the 8:00 am class. I assume you drive both ways so it's not convenient to drive home before picking her up. So I'd dress in my running gear, drop her at class, park nearby (park, shopping center, neighborhood ) and run for an hour, then pick her up from class.

[bensonduck]

Is there a running store in the college town or anywhere nearby? The staff are usually avid runners and may be able to help you lay out a route to run from campus while she is in class.

 

How early would you have to get up to get the run in before leaving at 7:15 to drive her? I had to get up once this week at 4:30 to get my run in before another commitment. Not sure how I would fare doing that three times a week though.

[Guest]

8 a. m. class, aside from reasons mentioned above, it beats the school bus traffic that will be present for the other two options.  Definitely consider carpool.

 

The CC probably has a cross country route laid out if you don't want to  figure out an on campus route.

[catz]

I regularly go for walks or jogs where my kids do classes and activities. Including during a Minnesota winter. I’d be shocked if you cannot find something workable in range of a college.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I'm sure not all on-line courses are equal, but my kid did a pre-calc on-line with the local CC and he hated it.  He got through it, but he said he'd never do it again.  I don't recommend Calc 1 as an on-line course especially if this is her first time taking a college course. 

 

8 am is probably more ideal, but I don't think 5:30 is that bad.  When younger I was more of a night owl so I wouldn't have minded that. 

[QueenCat]

8am class, run while she's in class. The other options don't sound like good educational options.

[KarenNC]

I would definitely sacrifice my run for the perfect class/professor, but the weather is a big issue for me.  Last spring semester, she had an 11am class twice a week so I had daylight in both directions and the roads were usually good.  We live in the snowbelt where there is lake-effect snow and the roads can get very bad and I'm scared to drive when it's like that.  

 

My perspective is as an insecure driver when it's at all snowy or icy, and someone who has spent years ferrying a child to times/events that were often very inconvenient to me, including a now a year and a half of DE. I've been in the resentful position and it doesn't do anyone any good, but I don't think this is really primarily about the run. I wouldn't be willing to do the 8 am class in winter even here where we have little chance of snow as often we get morning black ice situations that affect some areas but wouldn't necessarily close classes for the college. Weather is huge for me, especially as I get older and driving in the dark or in less than optimal conditions (heavy rain, for instance) becomes more challenging. At that time of the morning, you will also possibly be dealing with rush hour traffic which will complicate things even further and make the drive that much longer.

 

I've had to come to the point where I have to say, "These are the limits in which I can help you do this, so what options do we have within those limits?" For me, this isn't an issue of selfishness but of practicality and resources. I would look at it in the same light as if the student wanted to take a class or go to a camp that is way outside of the family budget. Yes, it may be a great opportunity, but I'm sorry we can't pull the resources from other needed areas for this. This is outside the "budget" of the resources you have--safety, availability of other parent to help drive, resources of gas and time, etc.

 

My daughter has chosen this semester to take a once a week long class in English to get the better professor and it has worked out. I would either look at the 5:30 class or at waiting until next semester and doing something at home/online in the meantime to keep her skills up, even Khan Academy or the like if needed. From what I gather, it's not at all uncommon for high school students on a semester block schedule to have both long classes and a semester or even a semester and a summer break between classes in a subject. I agree that isn't ideal in math. Would she have access to tutoring if she runs into issues with the 5:30 class?

I wouldn't be willing to do the 8 am class in winter even here where we have little chance of snow as often we get morning black ice situations that affect some areas but wouldn't necessarily close classes for the college. Weather is huge for me, especially as I get older and driving in the dark or in less than optimal conditions (heavy rain, for instance) becomes more challenging. At that time of the morning, you will also possibly be dealing with rush hour traffic which will complicate things even further and make the drive that much longer.

[ktgrok]

Agree. She could always do an online math SAT prep course for a semester to keep math skills sharp while waiting until next semester. Khan or what not. 

It's really easy as moms to discount things that are important to us, to see what others want as more important. My sister runs and I have see her when she's not able to run. For her, it's a release, how she starts the day, and sets everything right. We shouldn't need to devalue the OP's needs when there's a suitable option.

 

I would do the 5:30 class or wait a semester. Driving on curvy, winding roads on a dark morning when I may need to turn around and drive straight back home again because class was canceled wouldn't be worth it to me. It's ok for the daughter to be inconvenienced and not get the class she would prefer this semester.