Daddy-daughter dances creep me out

[poppy]

I would just say as a single mom of girls, I don't think that allowing girls to bring "other guys" takes away from the fact that this is an in-your-face reminder that most little girls have dads at home and we don't.  I'm fine with there being a dance we don't go to because it's not about us.  I'm not fine with being pressured to find some guy to stand in as a date for my elementary-age daughters.

 

As long as the dad-daughter and mom-son dances aren't the only opportunity to be social, as long as there is no penalty for skipping them, then fine.

 

Separately, this thread has me feeling sorry that my kids don't have a dancer in the home to teach them.  I personally could never dance in front of people, so I never learned.  The standing on daddy's shoes really wasn't enough.  :p  I mean I can fake it at a wedding if I have to (yes I think it's great that men lead, otherwise what would I do).  My mom even taught me how to polka - not sure I could remember it now.  In jr. high gym, we (girls only) were forced to learn a couple stupid line dances that involved grabbing the butt of the girl in front of you.  Eew.  Mostly I hid from dancing as much as I could.  :p  My kids would probably like to be able to dance with me and learn some moves at home.  Alas, one more way I have deprived them.  :p

 

If feasible, I'd love for my girls to take latin dance classes.  I looks beautiful and fun, and hopefully would translate more or less to an actual dance event.

 

Oh, I don't think there is any actual dancing involved.  The father-daughter dances I've seen involved a couple of father-daughter slow dance shuffles, but are 90% girls running around dancing together while dads watched bemused from the sideline.     ("Girls" = mostly elementary aged kids).

[maize]

So you obviously have something associated with the word date that many people don't have. It's semantics, not a fundamental issue in the relationships. I take my kids on dates in rotating order when I have another adult around to watch the others. It is that thing you were saying, family one on one time, without all the extra words. I don't even know what "date element" you are referencing because obviously there is no courtship.

There are so many uses of the word "date" outside of datING.

Right.

When I use the word date for an event with one (or sometimes two) of my kids it means "special time set aside just for us".

 

 

Zero romantic connotations.

[nixpix5]

Right.

When I use the word date for an event with one (or sometimes two) of my kids it means "special time set aside just for us".

 

 

Zero romantic connotations.

Yep, me too. My DH and I rotate dates with our kids. One weekend is me and my daughters date day and the next weekend might be his and a DS date day, and we make sure that everyone gets that time.

 

I love when my DH takes our daughter on a daddy daughter date. She gets special time with him that she loves. He can provide her with an example of a good male role model. She adores her daddy. She always wants to go to every daddy/daughter event that comes up.

 

I do understand the viewpoint of it not being fair to children without dad's. It reminds me of mid day award ceremonies at school when both parents work so some kids have parents and some do not

 

My daughter's hearing aids puts her into many situations where she is left out. Pool parties, soccer games in the rain (which is all season), any event in a loud auditorium with competing sounds because hearing aids don't filter background noise in the way our ears do. Lunchrooms at school were so hard for her she couldn't really take part in conversations well. I am still happy for all of the kids that do get to take part in those things and enjoy them but I often feel sad for her in those moments. Like the person who said taking a special male friend highlights not having a dad. When my daughter attends these events it highlights for her what is different about her for sure. I choose those moments to have conversations to boost resiliency, patience, joy for others, and counting our own blessings but it is hard.