what do you do for birthdays

[Elizabeth86]

We usually do a big party, but Im thinking of moving away from that. We usually invite family which consists of old people and small toddlers. Neither dh nor I have friends that we do things with, that has kids or kids our kids age. We do activities with kids our kids age, but our kids never really hit it off with then much at all. So, Im thinking it might be fun to spend their birthday just going places and doing things they want to do. It would be cheaper Im sure because I always spend a ton of money and then no one rsvps so I buy a ton of food and so may people flake. I was just curious what everyone else does.

[3 ladybugs]

I have yet to throw a party. I am just not into them. We typically go out to eat to the birthday person's choosing, then they get gifts at home. More often then not grandparents gifts are delayed (all are far away) or if they are not, then we wait till we can video chat with them and they can see the person open the gift. My children have 4 different grandparents that get things for them, so that is overwhelming enough as it is. 

[Guest]

We've done different things at different times. With little kids, we often had a family party. Once they knew some other kids, we usually, though not always, did a party at our house. I have rarely done "venue" parties; usually only did them if it was a bargain and we could invite a lot of cousins, kids, their siblings, etc. (Those were usually either Bowling, McDonalds Playland, or a pavillian at a park because you pay one fee and it doesn't matter how many kids come.) In the middle years, my DD often had around five or six friends spend the night at our house. My boys did this a few times, but not as often as DD did. We have also had an activity with one or two special friends before, ie., go out to eat and ten to a movie, then spend the night.

[Rebel Yell]

We have a very small local family: two widowed grandmothers, one ten mins away, the other 30 mins.

 

My girls are 22, 17, and 15. They have birthdays occasionally on or very close to Mother's Day, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. We have the dessert of their choice with the grannies at the holiday meal, which may or may not have both of them at the same time.

 

The Thanksgiving and Christmas babies have occasionally Chosen to combine their birthdays in between holidays for family when we had more family.

 

On their actual birthday, the birthday person, including mom and dad, chooses their meal- home or reasonably priced restaurant, plus dessert. Occasionally due to work, show/rehearsal, or school schedules we have moved the dinner to another day.

 

When they were all younger, they had a friends party with a budget limit every third year, so I only had one kids party per year. Then, no matter where they were in the rotation, they got a 13th birthday party, none again until Sweet Sixteen, then a high school grad party. 21st birthday is a restaurant meal with family, college graduation is restaurant meal with the five of us and a friend. Then no more parties until potential weddings :D

 

So basically, favorite meal ontheir birthday, cake with Grannies at the Holiday, friends party every three years until age 13, then follow the system until they age out.

 

Editing to add: friends parties have varied from typical birthday parties for a dozen friends, themed parties, a few friends movie and sleepover, hibachi restaurant, one friend horseback trail ride.

Edited August 31, 2017 by Rebel Yell

[creekland]

We tended to alternate doing small parties with a handful of friends one year and a small trip of their choice the next.  The trip being "their choice" kept it age appropriate from zoos to National Parks or DC, etc.

 

I liked the trips much better TBH.  I think they liked both.

[barnwife]

We have cake and ice cream. I hang a "happy birthday" sign and use a festive tablecloth. It's just us, unless family comes.

DH grew up in a family that...didn't do anything special for birthdays. This feels like a lot to him. For me, it's the bare minimum.

[Pink and Green Mom]

The 4 of us go out to dinner at a restaurant of the birthday boy's choosing (one always chooses Kobe Steakhouse, the other always wants seafood).  Sometimes my parents come with us (they live about an hour away).  No family or friend parties. 

Edited August 31, 2017 by Pink and Green Mom

[Wheres Toto]

Dh always had a summer pool party since he moved into our current house.  He would invite friends, family and co-workers.  Once we got married and had kids, it morphed into the kids birthday party as well, although it's now at a local lake instead of our neighborhood pool.   Both my kids have summer birthdays, exactly a month apart, so one party works well.

[Bluegoat]

We alternate years for my kids to have a "friend" party.  On other years, we usually have the grandparents over for cake.  My dd9 this year just had her bf come for supper.

 

For the friend parties, sometimes we have them here, games and such, but our house isn't great for it, so I kind of prefer a venue - but I am cheap, so nothing too expensive.  We did a bouncy house party at the community centre one year which was very easy.  Bowling.  There is a historic fort in our city that offers parties, so we did that once, it was really pretty fun.  Once my dh took them ice fishing.

 

This last year dd12 decided she was too old for that and instead invited two friends to see the new Star Wars movie.  I found that a much easier approach.

 

TBH I kind of wish I'd never got into the party with kids thing.  It would be ok if they had summer parties, we'd just go to a park and bbq.  But they need to have access to the indoors.