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MommyLiberty5013

How Often Do You Talk to Your

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Long distance BFF?

 

For me it's every 1-2 months. But I'm a bit hurt...her DH bought a fishing boat, she traded her car in for a minivan, and she ran a 5k and all of this I learned on FB...

 

And I consider these things BIG news. These are big things for her. Kinda just emoting, I guess, that I heard about it on FB.

😕

Edited by MommyLiberty5013

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I guess you'll have a lot of things to talk about on your next phone call. I'm sure you'll learn a lot more details then, plus be able to share some of the big and little things going on in your life.  No big deal. Sometimes people have a flurry of stuff happen, and then nothing much for months on end. 

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I am learning to navigate this with a close friend who moved 2 hours away. It isn't too far to visit several times a year but uer new schedule and mine now are just hard to mesh to find time to get together in person.

 

We do brief FB messages several times a week and talk for 30-45 minutes but it isn't the same.

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5 days a week minimum. She calls me every morning on her way to work. Been doing that for years.

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Some stretches it's daily and sometimes we've gone days, weeks, even months of no contact. I quit FB but when I used to check in randomly I would notice a lot of things she shared there that I had no idea about. On the other hand I also noticed that I knew about a whole lot of things she didn't share on FB. 

Edited by SGPS

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I talk with one sister almost daily, so she does know most of what is going on in my life. Anyone I communicate with less frequently than that though, no matter how close the relationship, is going to miss a great many details of my life just because I'm not going to think of all of them in the course of a once a month conversation.

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Depends which one.

 

One - could be daily. Could be months between.

 

Another at least every couple weeks. But often more.

 

Another 1-7 times a week. Sometimes a day. Lol

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We text once a month maybe and see each other 2 or 3 times a year. We don't talk on the phone.

 

The things you mention wouldn't even register as news to me but I'm sorry you were hurt to hear about that on FB. I'd be hurt if I heard about a pregnancy or death in her family via FB though.

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2x per week on average I would say.  There are a few of us who are very close.  One of them isn't as communicative, but when I drove through TX this summer, I got to see her twice and she dropped all of her plans to make time for me.

 

The others......two of them text daily (another in TX and one in SC).  Two others I talk to on the phone at least once per week (Seattle and NoVA.)

 

It just depends.  

 

We see each other physically at least once per year.  We just make it work.

 

Honestly, I would not think a 5K and a new van are big news.  My BFF in Seattle did call to tell me she bought a car exactly like mine because she liked mine so much when she was out here last.  HA!

 

But they had a truck for months before I knew.....and I was happy they got what they needed to haul things, but it wasn't on my radar as "news."

 

News to me is personal events.....kids getting awards, job changes, parents ill, etc.....

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The kinds of things we talk about are more personal than the things we post on FB. She's on vacation, visiting her in laws with her husband right now. She's posting pictures of their DD on the plane, and grandma playing with her and laughing. That's wonderful and I'm happy to see it. When she gets back, she will moan to me about trying to get dd to sleep, how her dh was no help at all, what dd ate that made her throw up, how much she adores her mil, and misses her so much. The kinds of things you don't see on fb. 

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Rarely, but it's been 30 years since we have lived in the same state, even!  So, we are still very close, but life has moved on and we are busy with our young adult children now and lots of other things.  We do try and see each other once a year though, if we can swing it, for a long weekend.  Those times are very special, and it's like we were never apart.  I'd so much rather sit down and talk about deep or difficult things in person rather than on the phone, and that seems to be the majority of what my close friends and I like to talk about together.

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It has varied over the years.  Minimally about once a month.  Lately now that our kids are older, 1-2 times a week.  

 

We have always had visits though, every 2-3 years, even when kids were small.  I think that makes a difference.  Maybe plan a trip if you are starting to feel distant!  It's worth maintaining a good relationship.

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We chat one Facebook at least weekly...more often when things are going on. I'm chatting with her now actually.

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Rarely, but it's been 30 years since we have lived in the same state, even! So, we are still very close, but life has moved on and we are busy with our young adult children now and lots of other things. We do try and see each other once a year though, if we can swing it, for a long weekend. Those times are very special, and it's like we were never apart. I'd so much rather sit down and talk about deep or difficult things in person rather than on the phone, and that seems to be the majority of what my close friends and I like to talk about together.

Yes. True. We do see one another every two years or so.

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Best friend/sister - Text throughout the day, every day. Phone call about once a week. We basically keep each other updated on everything as it happens.

 

Other best friend - Occasional text or phone call to ask a question or plan a visit. Maybe once a month? I see what's going on in her life via Facebook (even big things like moves, changing jobs, going on a huge trip, etc.), but when we meet up, every 2 or 3 months, we have long conversations about everything that's happened in our lives in the interim. I get the real story about how she's adjusting to her new city, why she left her job, etc., and don't mind at all that I first heard about it on Facebook. 

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Once a quarter (ie.  every 3 months).  I don't do FB so I don't see if she posts anything there but it doesn't matter because we talk for hours when we do get together and some of it is spent on catching each other up on what we've been up to.  Both of us have other friends that we see much more regularly (because of proximity and other reasons) but our relationship runs deeper and when we do see each other we talk about things that we don't share with others. 

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Once a quarter (ie. every 3 months). I don't do FB so I don't see if she posts anything there but it doesn't matter because we talk for hours when we do get together and some of it is spent on catching each other up on what we've been up to. Both of us have other friends that we see much more regularly (because of proximity and other reasons) but our relationship runs deeper and when we do see each other we talk about things that we don't share with others.

This is what I am finding with my friend that moved away. We see each other much less often and I really miss that but when we do talk it is in depth.

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Usually daily we just kind have a constant message stream that we don't expect immediate answers to but send stuff out as we think of it.

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I get my feelings hurt b/c my BFF goes quiet when life is hard. She doesn't want to talk -- she only wants to lick her wounds. It's hard b/c I'm the opposite: I want to talk and get reassurance when things are hard.

 

She's going through a rough time and I haven't heard from her -- in a real way -- since June.

 

Alley

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