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Gap year idea-Have we lost our minds?


retiredHSmom
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My son is heading into his senior year. He plans to attend a senior military college and commission into military service when he graduates.  

 

He told me last week that he really wants to spend a year pitting himself against the wilderness.  Living off the land and building his own house, hunting/trapping/growing his own food.  

 

We spent a long time chatting about this idea and fleshing out how it would work.  A safety plan etc.  

 

He has skills to make this actually work.  He is an eagle scout with a troop that does a lot of wilderness survival he has spent 150 nights in a tent and hiked over 300 miles in the last few years.  He has helped build 4 decks and a great deal of furniture he has competed in marksmanship for the last two years.  

 

Our conversation was very much as though this was an unattainable but very desirable dream.

 

I later mentioned it to my husband and the crazy thing is that I think we could make this happen.  

 

We live in the urban sprawl of Washington DC and my husband has long wanted to move out to the country but there are many job opportunities here, I love it here, we have a fantastic community, my parents and all my siblings live here.

 

 Anyway he and I recently came to the conclusion that we won't move but that at some future point we would look into buying 20-40 acres in the shenandoah foothills and build a weekend home.  We had not mentioned this idea to any of our kids at all.  

 

So my husband thinks that we should buy the land sooner (like in the next year) and let our son homestead there for a year before we begin building on it.  We haven't told our son yet.  We would be about an hour and a half away and could visit occasionally. 

 

Have we lost it?  Is this a reasonable idea at all?  My heart says yes, my mind says no.  This really would be his only chance if he does want to serve in the military for 20 years (he plans to have a family and already stated that he wouldn't want to leave a family to do it or expect a family to live like this so after his military career is out)

 

I am going to contact the admissions departments for the colleges that he would like to apply to and see if he should apply then defer acceptance or just wait to apply (normally he would contact them, but I don't want to tell him that we are actively considering this plan and I think that the college piece is important in my decision making)

 

so are we crazy?  or really, really crazy?

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I would imagine the military academies would consider this a pretty cool gap year.  The issue would be if he started, found he couldn't hack it, and gave up 6 weeks in (or, through no fault of his own, is injured, sick, turns out there are rules against homesteading there... etc.)  Some places are not considered legally inhabitable without running water, etc.  I think it varies by state. 

 

I can't even imagine how much more maturity he would bring to the table compared to a recent HS grad after a year like that.  

 

I'll be crazy and say it sounds great, assuming certain safety precautions are in place.  You don't want it to turn into "Into the Wild" or anything.

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We know various families with kids doing somewhat similar wilderness experiences, with varying degrees of independence from outside help.  However, none are planning to segue to military afterwards  (one is going into park service, another into biology, and I've really no clue about the other).  (Gosh, I just realized how popular this is in our crowd!)

 

I would think a lot would depend on what the colleges say.

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We know various families with kids doing somewhat similar wilderness experiences, with varying degrees of independence from outside help.  However, none are planning to segue to military afterwards  (one is going into park service, another into biology, and I've really no clue about the other).  (Gosh, I just realized how popular this is in our crowd!)

 

I would think a lot would depend on what the colleges say.

I am surprised that you know three people doing this as well!  It does make me feel a little less crazy.

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I think a year may be even longer than the Aborigonal walkabout.

I would question whether 20-40 acres is nearly enough if he is planning on eating small animals.

If he is looking for a really tough outdoor experience, after he is commissioned in the military, he can apply to Ranger school.

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When I first started reading your post, I thought this is crazy, why would she even consider it? Tell him he funds it himself and he will move on.

 

Then I got to the end of your post and I was like..wow! She has a real plan! This is kind of cool. This could be really be neat!! It sounds like a neat idea.

 

I wonder, though, if your son would still want to do this in a few months? I would still have him apply to the places he wants to go with the idea that he can defer his start by a year if he still wants to do all this in the spring.

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If you can figure out the details it doesn't sound unreasonable.  I have read and followed lots of young people that take off sailing around the world or hiking the AT or Pacific Coast Trail and many other various adventures.  Do be open to the possibility that he might not want the military after doing it.  I think it would be hard to go from that kind of freedom to becoming someone that has to follow orders.  I don't know if you are Christians or not but there are 2 books written by Robin Lee Graham one where he spends 5 years sailing around the world and one where he and his wife homestead in Kalispell MT for several years and live off the land.  It has their spiritual journey in it as well, but he might be very interested in the adventure and homesteading stories in the book.

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As long as he can defer his entrance to college, I don't see why this is a bad idea, provided you don't run into legal problems and he's willing to let you stay in touch.  I would hesitate to tell the college the plan in case they don't want him if he fails.  I wouldn't want success attached to his college plans.  Can you just ask to defer a year and not say why?  Or just say he has a number of plans for his gap year?  That way, if he can't do it, he could switch to something else cool but not quite so demanding, like hiking the AT or something.

 

Nan

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Thinking some more about this - I think your biggest problem would be buying a suitable plot of land, one with the resources to support him (suitable water, etc.) and one on which it is legal to try this (pit toilet, hunting, etc. legal).

 

Nan

 

This is my thought. 20 acres isn't nearly enough. I could see it working on my in-laws 200 acres though. Water would be a basic requirement obviously, but legalities can complicate it too. It would also be important to start the adventure early enough in the spring to plant a garden, then build a sturdy shelter and have enough firewood stored for winter. Virginia doesn't have brutal winters, but it isn't exactly balmy either :). If the college would offer deferment, he could create a realistic plan and you could offer him the space, I don't see any real problems with it, but it might turn out to be more tedious work than adventure. 

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We have a camp on 25 acres; it's pretty small (considering).

 

We do have deer, wild pigs, rabbits, and so on, so meat would potentially be the easiest part on our land. However, I will say that there is a lot more to hunting than just killing the animal. Can he drain and gut a deer? Aside from technique, it is beyond disgusting, lol. Does he know how to store the meat afterwards? 

 

Gardening of course takes time to establish. And, if you are in a place that has animals to shoot for meat, those same animals are going to try and eat your garden, so fencing is needed (but not always completely effective). 

 

You'd have to see what type of 'house' he would be allowed to build. Anything permanent might be problematic with taxes, codes, or when you go to build your own house. 

 

Does he have the money that will be needed to buy the tools for the above activities? They are expensive. 

 

I'm not trying to rain on his parade, just trying to point out potential obstacles. 

 

Another thing to keep in mind is that wilderness survival and homesteading are really two completely different things. Some skill sets overlap, sure, but they don't equate at all. He should take an in-depth look at some homesteading and wilderness survival sites and work to clarify his objectives. 

 

It sounds like he has some solid experience and skills, but I'm not sure I'd jump from that to a year alone in the wilderness. I'd work backwards  from that goal, listing out what he needs to do and learn, and then get started at the beginning (whatever that is for him). 

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I have a friend who did something similar. He might not have hunted for meat, I can't remember exactly. He planned and saved enough to be gone for a year. It was a sort of journey of renewal for him and he ended up being gone a much shorter time as he did some hitchhiking too. 

 

He's basically a wilderness expert and knows what in the wild to avoid eating, can identify snakes, etc. He even had his SSN tattoed on his torso in case of the worst case scenario. It was pretty cool to hear him about talk about his experiences. 

 

For the right kid, I can see this being a great experience. For my own sanity, I would require some sort of check in on a regular basis, just to make sure they were okay. 

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I don't think it's crazy at all. Really, land is a good investment in itself. I think, in the long term,land is better than money in the bank. When you pair that with the excellent experience it would provide for your son, if you can swing it, I'd suggest that you go for it. Your son would learn things that he can carry with him for a lifetime. Worst case is that you sell it later.

My son took a gap-year to help rebuild a house. It gave him a chance to mature and to learn skills that he wouldn't have learned in college. That experience turned out to be quite valuable as it has distinguished him from others applying for architectural design type internships. This year he got more internship offers than he could possibly accept. Likewise, if your son gains experience in self-sufficient living, building, etc., I bet that it would be at least as beneficial to his military career.

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I think this gap year idea really depends on what military college he is desiring to enter. If it is an actual service academy, I have a few considerations to offer. FYI, both of my children are currently in service academies, so I am quite familiar with them, many people in them, and their processes/viewpoints.

 

1. The service academies highly value teamwork and leadership. While one could argue that this shows leadership...he will be alone. That's not really the kind of leadership that translates to the environment of a service academy, or to most of our military (few wind up having to survive alone in the wilderness. Even SEALS operate as a team). Teamwork and learning to work with difficult people will be lacking in this type of experience. Success at a service academy is all about team, not about what you can accomplish individually. Furthermore, these types of survival skills are taught at some (maybe all?)service academies during mandated summer programs. My ds has completed this training already. I don't really think the fact that your ds might want to do it for a whole year versus a few months will make it more "special." It might be considered an interesting experience on his dossier, but I just am not sure it will be considered a point-earning credential by service academies. Instead of showing service to others, it is very much focused on "all about me." I don't say that in a derogatory manner, just a factual one. If you are living by yourself, it is all about you. :)

 

2. If he takes a year off, he should be prepared to retake his SATs and other standardized tests. Or resume college for a year or two elsewhere, thereby developing a new track record of high academic performance prior to applying to the military school. The service academies closely watch academic performance even after giving an individual an appointment. Indeed, if performance drops significantly, an appointment can be rescinded. If your ds takes a year off from academics, he will need to re-establish that before applying.

 

3. The service academies do not "defer" appointments for a year. There are way too many highly qualified individuals who complete the entire application process each year. And a bunch of those get turned away as it is. 

 

4. I am not familiar with other military colleges (non-service academies), but I would not ever call for your son. You could suggest to ds that if he is serious about the idea, he should call the appropriate folks at the colleges he is interested in to ask them about it, before you all discuss it further as a family. So he doesn't need to know about your ideas in order for you to suggest he call. As a matter of fact, if he isn't willing to call them on his own, I think it will be a good indicator for you as to his actual seriousness (or lack thereof) regarding attending a military school afterward.

 

I don't necessarily think this is a crazy idea if it is something he really is motivated to do because he wants to, and you as a family are supportive of the idea. BUT...if the motivating reason is he thinks it will better prepare him for a service academy, then I actually think he is misinformed without realizing it. Just thought it was important to share some of these thoughts.

 

Please feel free to pm me if you have specific questions about the service academies/admissions processes.

 

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Apart from the college admissions issues, it sounds like quite an adventure.

 

A few years ago I read See You in a Hundred Years, which is about a couple who bought an old farmhouse in the Shenandoah Valley and who lived there like it was in the early 1900's. Very eye-opening. 

 

I know two local young adults who did the Appalachian Trail as part of a gap year. 

 

Just some ideas.

 

I'd be inclined to recommend starting with a travel trailer while the house is being built. It gives you a place to store your food and shelter when you really need it. Just a thought...

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Homesteaders brought supplies and animals with them. The daughter of a friend is homesteading this summer in a ramshackle cabin out on a prairie nearby. She brought a friend with her. They have a water pump but no electricity, and it's only for the summer. I was a bit envious!

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He might like to watch this film and read Richard Proenneke's book. Not a howâ€to (especially considering the differences between Alaska and Virginia) but inspiring.

 

Alone in the Wilderness

https://www.amazon.com/Alone-Wilderness-Dick-Proenneke/dp/B0009PUAFG/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1499192120&sr=8-1&keywords=one+mans+wilderness+dvd

 

One Man's Wilderness

https://www.amazon.com/One-Mans-Wilderness-Alaskan-Odyssey/dp/0882405136/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1499192120&sr=8-2&keywords=one+mans+wilderness+dvd

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