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Do you dress like a Mom?


meganrussell
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I find this funny. My kids have always thanked me for not dressing like I was trying to be a teen. And my 24yo who is having her first any day now has been getting rid of several items because she said she does not think moms should wear them. She definitely has her own ideas. I am curious whay she will wear after the baby is here.

 

 

:lol:

 

Every Mother's Day for the last several years my eldest has posted on Facebook and Twitter, "Again as my gift to my mother, I re-commit never to refer to her as "my best friend" on any form of social media."

 

I'm with her.  Love you baby: you stay in your lane, I'll stay in mine.

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It's hard to find clothes in between Forever 21/Zara/Charlotte Russe/etc. teenybopper styles and Chico/Coldwater Creek/etc. "mature" styles. Especially if you're petite and wear a single-digit size. I don't want to dress like I'm 22 but I don't want to dress like I'm 62 either.

 

With being a SAHM/student, I can get away with jeans or yoga pants and a basic top but once I start my clinical practica, I will need an office-appropriate wardrobe. So not looking forward to having to shop for that...

 

There really ARE a lot of places to shop in between the teen vs 'mature' styles. I have found the mature labels are usually too big for me. As always, brands and stores will have stuff you like and don't like, so you have to be selective-

You can get items from these places at a decent price for the quality or buy them on good sales

Try 

Nordstrom-for lots of brands to choose from

Everlane

Boden

Grana

Joie

Banana republic

Ann Taylor

Loft

Splendid

Theory

Pure Collection

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I dress for comfort rather than style and wear mostly jeans / t-shirts / Vans. I buy almost all of my clothes at thrift stores and have found that certain brands are better for me (Gap, Loft, J Crew, etc.) and others are better for my 14yo DD (Forever 21, American Eagle, Hollister, etc). I try to dress in a more understated way, mostly because that's just my style, but that helps keep me on the mom side. Even though I love my DD's cat leggings, I'll let her wear them and stick with my skinny jeans.

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I still shop in the Juniors/teen section of the most stores (JC Penney, Dillard's, Target, etc).

 

Well this might be part of the issue. Not only are the sizes small, but the styles are going to be different than other stores targeting older women. Have you tried shopping in the petite section of those stores and others?

 

Do you want to look older? If so, you might have to let go of some of the casual, comfortable clothes, and you might have to start paying more for clothes.

 

Shoes can be a good way to look older - avoid flip flops and the more typical little girl shoes. Add length to skirts, shorts and shirts. Avoid too tight clothes. Add in more formal styles of clothing. Wear your hair in a more formal style. 

 

Later, when the wrinkles become more obvious, you can let go of more of the formal styles and go casual again. ;)

Edited by wintermom
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Perhaps it's easier to dress like a mom when one is heavier and automatically "sized-out" of the juniors section.

As for what I wear: mostly jeans and graphic tees (super hero/book/movie/science references) + colorful tennis shoes...or capris and tees and flip flops...or hiking shorts, tees, Keens

 

(I suppose tees being the common factor amongst my wardrobe variations...) :p

Edited by alisoncooks
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This is hard to believe! Fashion aside, I'm sure you know this, but it's hard on daughters when their moms think they look like sisters - especially if they say that in front of people a lot.

 

I've had people say this to me and my girls, but I don't ever say it to them.

 

I don't even want to look like sisters to my girls.

 

Oddly though, my girls have mentioned before that they are glad that I dress somewhat nicely and take care of myself.

 

Things that teens wear that moms "shouldn't" 

 

(in quotes because people can wear what they want, but on older looking people it sometimes looks like they;re trying too hard to be young)

 

Short tight dresses

 

Off the shoulder, except for formal wear.

 

Cleavage baring tops and dresses.

 

Midriff baring anything.

 

Short shorts

 

Ripped jeans/shorts

 

 

 

I think you can keep the skinny jeans.

 

I kind of go for a classic, office Casual Friday style.

 

Also, if you want to look more momish, replace the sneakers with nicer looking shoes, unless you're exercising. I have a pair of leather loafers that really look great with jeans, but make it look a bit more dressed up.

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I usually wear jeans and t's.   I'm in my 50s.  I'm often mistaken for at least ten years younger than I am.  even when my girls were tweens .. . I had people think I was their sister.  that hasn't changed - especially with 1dd.

 

eta: I got into jeans and ts when I dealt with baby spit.  easy to wash.

Edited by gardenmom5
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I don't know if I dress like a mom or not. I've always dressed this way!

Jeans, maybe capris if it is hot (not today), and a button up shirt. I will wear a tee, but rarely. 

My kids laugh because all my shirts are either solid, plaid, or striped. I have a few floral (mostly Hawaiian) shirts that I wear on occasion. 
I'm a reformed/retired engineer, and I still favor the same clothes I wore to work (except I wear jeans instead of dress pants). Those Hawaiian shirts are my rebellion! 

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I'm 56. I wear jeans, usually a graphic t shirt, and gray slip on Vans.  If I'm not leaving home I might wear my black Athleta yoga pants.  I wear shorts and tank tops when I work in the yard in the summer but don't wear those in public. 

I do dress up when the occasion calls for it. 

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I don't know what a mom is supposed to dress like? I see lots of variation in style among women of all ages.

 

FWIW I'm 54 and have never particularly cared about fashion or style. Today I'm wearing denim capris, a bright pink Nike running/athletic tee and sandals. I'm at an oral surgery waiting for DS to get his wisdom teeth out. This afternoon I have an appointment with our investment advisor. I will probably wear the same clothes all day even though I'm certainly a bit informal for this afternoon's appointment. I don't care. He works for me.

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I do ask my two girls (17 and 22) if things look OK on me age-wise. (I'm 52.) We all wear about the same size and trade clothes around a lot, and I have been known to wear their hand-me-downs. (Hey, it's often something I've purchased, after all.) However, I definitely have "going out" clothes and "casual/whatever" clothes. It probably helps that I have always like classic lines, styles, and colors, and much of my girls' clothes are fairly classic too.

 

I do have a funny story, though. Last winter our 17 yo had a December soccer tournament—outdoors in the 29 degree weather at 9:30 p.m. at night. It was SO COLD! I decided I was going to fight the elements and wore layers, ski pants, and boots. However, my black ski jacket doesn't have a hood, and I wanted more than a knit cap. I asked my daughter if I could borrow her hooded ski jacket, but—as it is a blue violet—I wasn't sure if it would look weird.

 

Me: Do you think it's age appropriate for me to wear your jacket?

 

Dd: Mom. You're wearing ski pants. At this point, I don't think it matters what else you wear.

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There really ARE a lot of places to shop in between the teen vs 'mature' styles. I have found the mature labels are usually too big for me. As always, brands and stores will have stuff you like and don't like, so you have to be selective-

You can get items from these places at a decent price for the quality or buy them on good sales

Try 

Nordstrom-for lots of brands to choose from

Everlane

Boden

Grana

Joie

Banana republic

Ann Taylor

Loft

Splendid

Theory

Pure Collection

 

Nordstrom, Banana Republic, Ann Taylor are WAAAAY out of my budget. Even Nordstrom Rack and Ann Taylor Loft are out of my budget unless the stuff is on clearance. Never heard of most of the rest.

 

I need Forever 21/Zara/Charlotte Russe/Uniqlo prices but not teenybopper styles.

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It's hard to find clothes in between Forever 21/Zara/Charlotte Russe/etc. teenybopper styles and Chico/Coldwater Creek/etc. "mature" styles. Especially if you're petite and wear a single-digit size. I don't want to dress like I'm 22 but I don't want to dress like I'm 62 either.

I am a size 00. Tahari, Armani Exchange formal sheath dresses have my size. They have work jackets that are petite too but sleeve length might be an issue. Banana Republic's and JCrew's petite range for formal work clothes are still too big.

 

ETA:

The price tag may not work even during sales. I did get a few sheath dresses at around $20 because no one else could wear that size probably. I am almost the same size as the mannequins.

Edited by Arcadia
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I live in the world of women who spend much time and money to look as young as possible and wear very high end athletic gear most of the summer. They also (as they do look good for their age) will dress in tight, revealing, young fashion. And the only people who seem to care and comment are their teen daughters. They do not like when their moms dress like teens. 

Having posted about this before, people thought the girls were being spoiled and ridiculous. But really, the girls do not want their mom to dress exactly like them and in the same clothes. Teens like to have their own looks, culture, and experiences without being infringed on by adults. And I think that is correct. Because when you see teens, they are young and effortlessly beautiful. When you see their moms in the same clothes, they do not project the same image, no matter how much they work out or have work done.

 

Shop in the womens department, buy higher quality clothes, try to look older and more sophisticated than your teen. 

 

 

That's SO not the case over here.  My teenage daughter was completely baffled when I had a mini freak out over unintentionally wearing the same jeans (different size, lol, same distinct patches) as her... to co-op!  She told me I was being stupid.  Her friends agreed.

 

(They've sat in my drawer since then, by my own choice.)

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Nordstrom, Banana Republic, Ann Taylor are WAAAAY out of my budget. Even Nordstrom Rack and Ann Taylor Loft are out of my budget unless the stuff is on clearance. Never heard of most of the rest.

 

I need Forever 21/Zara/Charlotte Russe/Uniqlo prices but not teenybopper styles.

Do you have any good thrift stores around you? I'm also petite and wear a small size. The Goodwill stores in my area usually have an abundance of women's clothes in small sizes. Ann Taylor fits me well and is a frequent find. I also shop at the Loft outlet store where the prices are much cheaper.

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I have two ways of dressing.  If I am at home or around home, and doing cleaning or gardening, I tend to be pretty straightforward - jeans, yoga pants if I am not going out, simple tops.  Stuff that I don't mind if it gets dirty or ruined and I can move around in.  Not quite what I wore in high school when grunge was the thing - less flannel.

 

I also have a wardrobe that is more fashion conscious.  It has evolved some over the years, mostly unconsciously.  In my 20s it was more boho-librarian, and now is probably is more urban/librarian.  The boho/hippy thing didn't work as well as I aged - it tended to look cheap, or make me look frumpy.  A more fitted wardrobe looks a lot better now.

 

I turned 40 this year and I don't want to dress "old" particularly, but I also don't want to come off as mutton dressed like lamb - like I am thinking I am, or wanting to be, 20.  So - I am keeping my knee high doc martins and leather pants and funny knee-socks.  But I'm probably not going for the latest trendy stuff.  I can't easily shop at the mall stores like Forever 21.

 

I think one of the best ways to make a change is probably to start look at spending at least some of your clothing budget on some high quality clothes.

 

 

 

 

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I do find the botique shops in the mall are not great for clothes for older people.  I end up in The Bay a lot of the time for new, or second hand.  Consignment stores often have high quality clothes.. 

 

On the bright side, the more expensive lines typically last better and longer.

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Well, I'm super close to 50 (about two months away) AND I'm a grandma. It sounds like we dress quite a bit alike. :) I have those same shorts from Old Navy, except 5" inseam and khaki and black, and I just bought a couple tops there. I also wear skinny jeans. Mine are stretchy and very comfy. I wear what I like and what is comfortable. I also look younger than I am. While I don't look like a teenager, I have my 1 and 3 yo grandkids with me all the time, and most people think I'm their mom.

 

All that said, I think women should wear what makes them feel good and what is comfortable. I don't really care how other women dress. I am more interested in who they are.

 

In my opinion, life is too short to live by other people's fashion rules. :)

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My uniform, almost year-round, is a maxi skirt (jersey or cotton) with a sleeveless shirt.  That's pretty much what I wore as a 20-something too, except now I wear a Half-tee under my shirt to make sure I don't flash anybody when I bend over to keep a toddler from eating a flattened frog off the asphalt in the parking lot...

I will say my older son is pretty sensitive to how I look, which is weird.  He likes it that I wear skirts, but doesn't like it when I show my legs.  He's been that way since he was 3 or so--not sure where that came from!  I reckon it's not mom-like enough for him or something.

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I don't know. I wear jeans and flowy shirts or T-shirts. I wear Birkenstocks or Converse, both in many different colors, every day. Today I have on polka dotted converse from the kids section, Capri jeans from old navy (they have a premade hole which made me laugh but I like the fit), and a sort of tie dyed look t shirt. I'm dressed for yard work. :) Are those mom clothes?

 

I'm short, not quite 5'. I shop in petites, or sometimes juniors but not so much these days - I haven't found much lately.

Edited by Spryte
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In my 40's--I think I dress fashionably but modestly.  I am having trouble finding summer dresses that aren't super short, and for shorts, I like the bermuda cut.  So maybe that makes me look like a mom.  And I went from loving Ross to Ann Taylor. 

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I don't care for the traditional mom look, but I don't want to look like I'm trying to be younger than I am either.  And I want to be comfortable!

 

In the winter it's usually skinny (not skin tight) or straight back jeans, a warm loose sweater, and black boots.

 

In the summer it's usually skinny(ish) bermuda shorts, some kind of a sleeveless shirt that allows me to bend over and be comfortable, and flat black sandals.

 

 

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Yes, no cleavage here either! No belly shirts or super tight clothes. However, skinny jeans, ripped jeans, shorts...these I'm thinking should be dropped. I just need opinions! I do dress to flatter my shape, and I never look tacky (IMO).

 

I don't wear fashionable clothing, but my sister, who is a mom and a high school principal, does. I can say that skinny jeans and regular shorts are totally mom fashion nowadays. Short shorts (say a lot shorter than finger tip length) and ripped jeans are not. 

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In my twenties, I followed fashion trends closely. In my thirties, I started building "a look", depending on the time of day and purpose, and limiting my wardrobe to items that fit that look. Now, I don't venture much outside what works for me. I don't think I have a "mom look" as I get compliments when I dress up, but I definitely don't shop a lot or follow fashion.

 

I decided on my style by browsing images of street fashion and building a look board on pinterest, noting what I particularly liked about the outfit in the notes section. I think I look like an adult, not frumpy, but this applies only to the times I appear in public. At home, I live in yoga pants or maxi dresses.

Edited by ErinE
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I've always dressed a bit preppier, like a lands end catalog instead of j crew. That was when I was a teen and now as an adult. So yes, I dress like a mom even though I'm younger than you. But I've always dressed this way, it's my style more than my age. Make sense?

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I'll be 36 next month. I buy my clothes from Mod Cloth (so kinda quirky) but I also have a full sleeve and a few other visible tattoos. so I'm not sure what kind of mom I look like.

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I'm sort of in a conundrum.  I have pretty much worn a uniform for 10 years at a time all my life.  But one thing that has been consistent is that I like and I wear jeans.  Always have. I have changed a LITTLE bit with the fashion but mostly because I can't find what I prefer from season to season--but I go for what is most useful and looks best on my body and is cheapest, so it is hardly a "fashion statement." And I like and wear white leather tennis shoes.  Always have.  I have endured the eyerolls, the comments, the shame of the Mom in White Tennis Shoe Haters.  I don't care.  

 

So now, white leather tennis shoes are "hot" in my son's crowd.  HE has white leather Reeboks.  NOW what am I supposed to do???????

 

:0)

 

(I like to dress appropriately for my age, for ease of movement, and to be ready in case a round of golf breaks out.  Not that I play, but that is the ethos. I do think clothing sends a signal that gives people a clue about how to approach you, so I want to look like I've got good sense at any rate.)

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You can definitely dress age-appropriately and be on trend.  Have you looked for any fashion bloggers that are your age to see what they are wearing?  I have found several in my age range and it has been so helpful to learn some basics of what is on trend, but then to decide which trends work for me and what trends just don't.  I have learned some basic formulas that work for me over and over and are so effortless, but look put together. I few bloggers that I can think of that are in their early thirties are:  Blog Corrilyn,Putting me Together, and The Small Things Blog. 

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My kids are so funny... they (and their shared opinions) actually keep me right on the line between gramma and too young for my age. They are truly very encouraging and understand I would rather lean classic than trendy, but make sure I don't buy and wear the sort of things my mom & MIL wear.

 

So to answer the question, I don't dress "young" as in too young, but i don't dress "old" either. I do not have a large wardrobe or crammed full closet - I just don't like to spend money that way.

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In doing my first Get Your Pretty On challenge this summer. It was $40 for the clothing list, outfit lists, etc. I also got access to the challenge from last year. I like that it's cute, pulled together, and mostly classic with pops of trends. I love the combos and feel great about not looking like a slob. :-)

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I usually dress appropriate for my age, but I like to think I most often look stylish and classic, not... Dumpy-frumpy mom. My DD and I share some clothing, but she is much more likely to wear trendy things; I generally avoid those. I'm pretty much a Talbots dresser. I do not wear things like regular sneakers or capri athletic wear or freebie tee shirts as my "day clothes." If I'm wearing something like that, I'm in the garden or chicken coop and will be changing before I go anywhere. I am dressed "down" right now because I was gardening today; bermuda-length denim shorts and a plain coral-colored jogging tee shirt.

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I don't wear fashionable clothing, but my sister, who is a mom and a high school principal, does. I can say that skinny jeans and regular shorts are totally mom fashion nowadays. Short shorts (say a lot shorter than finger tip length) and ripped jeans are not. 

 

Yes, here, too.  The mom uniform is skinny jeans with sparkly butts, knee high boots or Lady Gaga style shoes (depending on season) and fitted shirts from Old Navy.  LOL

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I don't wear fashionable clothing, but my sister, who is a mom and a high school principal, does. I can say that skinny jeans and regular shorts are totally mom fashion nowadays. Short shorts (say a lot shorter than finger tip length) and ripped jeans are not.

I do not wear ripped jeans, but I know many moms who do wear them. I also don't wear short shorts; I don't really even love shorts; I like skorts or skirts more. I will wear slim jeans, but not so much "skinny" jeans. It annoys me to have them slinging to my calves.

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I'm 38, have a 15 year old, and look young for my age too and still get carded all the time. I definitely don't like the mom look, and for the last few years I've struggled with my clothing identity. I used to live in graphic tees, jeans, shorts, and 'hippie' skirts, but have changed my style and get a lot of inspiration from sites such as http://www.puttingmetogether.com/?m=1

She's cute and trendy without looking like a teenybopper. Accessories really do a lot to tie the outfit together, and my go to stores are now Gap, Old Navy, H&M, Modcloth, Jcrew, Madewell.... trendy but not mom or teen and I do wear skinny jeans, but not the skin tight ones!

Edited by NatureMomma
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Thank you all for your replies, suggestions, and experiences! It has helped me a lot. In reading these replies, I feel like I'm not a "teen" dresser, just trendy, and as long as it's age appropriate, I can continue. My kids think I'm cool, have never complained or been embarrassed by my clothes, and my husband approves. So I guess I'm good! Although I am going to start shopping in the woman's section, and at different stores, too. I am also checking out the links y'all provided me.

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It's hard to find clothes in between Forever 21/Zara/Charlotte Russe/etc. teenybopper styles and Chico/Coldwater Creek/etc. "mature" styles. Especially if you're petite and wear a single-digit size. I don't want to dress like I'm 22 but I don't want to dress like I'm 62 either.

 

With being a SAHM/student, I can get away with jeans or yoga pants and a basic top but once I start my clinical practica, I will need an office-appropriate wardrobe. So not looking forward to having to shop for that...

Yes, that is another issue. If your size is at either end of the range your choices shrink. Especially on my budget ;-)

 

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G900A using Tapatalk

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I'm 50 and don't dress like a mom most of the time. I dress like a college student because I am one. I'm working at the college this summer and had to buy some shirts that were not graphic tees because apparently I wear those a lot to school. 

 

Have you spent any time on Pinterest looking at either capsule wardrobes or things like Project 333 for dressing ideas? They can be classic, trendy, whatever style you like. 

 

I agree that you should dress your style, but I would consider investing into some quality pieces that can be viewed as more mature looking for when you want to exude that. 

 

You could start with accessories. Invest in a quality handbag. TJ Maxx/Marshalls have some decent ones for decent prices. Something that says adult and doesn't look like it needs to be replaced in six months. It's doesn't have to be bland and boring either. 

 

Shoes is another area. I'm gave up on cute, trendy shoes without good support. So no $1 flip flops from Old Navy. Although at 32 that may not be as much of an issue for you. 

 

I'm not so much into fashion, yet I have developed my own sense of style. There are, however, dynamics at play about how people in public treat you based upon how you dress. I will often dress for the way in which I want to be perceived, not that I really care about what other people think but more the persona I want to exude I guess. I ended up at the store wearing my pajama pants and a baggy shirt the other day. 

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DD and I had to fish out her passport today, and so she dug out an old passport of mine that was about 30 years old and said "Wow, what happened?"

 

OK I had a non helpful conversation with dd who is 19 the other day. I forget exactly what prompted me to ask about my fashion, but she very bluntly responded "you look like you gave up." and adding that when I was teaching math part time, which I quit doing a year ago "you looked like a middle aged teacher".

 

I no longer look like a middle aged teacher. I now just look like I gave up. Yay me. Maybe I need a makeover.

 

(understand that dd was not meaning to be rude or mean and is not normally rude or mean. )

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I looked very young (about 13) until I was nearly 30. Now I'm nearly 40 and it's no longer an issue. :D 

 

I'm still in jeans and solid t-shirts or polo shirts most of the time. In addition to the sleep deprivation and a hint of gray hair, the main differences are a different haircut and the shoes.

 

And a difference most people wouldn't notice is that I've switched somewhat from colors I like to colors that look good on me (mostly replacing green with purple).

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I wear what I find comfortable, which at this point is jeans, leggings/yoga pants, t-shirts (some printed, some not), hoodies, sneakers or Keens in the summer, Uggs in the winter.    I'm 47 and don't really care what anyone thinks.  I would dress from the junior department if any of that stuff fit me.  I love the bohemian styles that are currently in fashion but many of them wouldn't look good with my current body shape.  Even more than fit, they don't fit my current lifestyle.

 

When I was 32 to 35, I was a LOT thinner than I am now and single.  I dressed a lot "younger" then, including ripped jeans.   :001_cool:  My dd inherited some of those clothes when I outgrew them.  She recently mentioned that she wished I gave her more of them instead of donating them because she really liked some of them.   She's a very trendy 23 year old so I guess that gives you the idea.

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I dress for my age. I do not shop in the junior dept even though size wise I could. Just because something fits me doesn't mean I should wear it. I do not wear shorts shorter than bermuda shorts, I do not wear skirts/dresses that are more than 2 inches above my knees. I do not wear clothing with logos or sparkly embellishments. 

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I dress for my age. I do not shop in the junior dept even though size wise I could. Just because something fits me doesn't mean I should wear it. I do not wear shorts shorter than bermuda shorts, I do not wear skirts/dresses that are more than 2 inches above my knees. I do not wear clothing with logos or sparkly embellishments. 

 

It will be a sad day if I think I'm too old for sparkles! 

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Not sure. I see a lot of different fashions in the mums around me as well as the teens. Some days I seem to be & am easily clocked as a mum; other days people think I'm their big sister or I get carded repeatedly. I think I dress more like a mum than a teen. 

 

My comfy-uniform is long skirt or kilt + tank top or shirt + overshirt or fleece or, if feeling fancy, a blazer. Occasionally a dress and overshirt if I want to make things easier and I'm not risking much temperature change. If it's going to be a late night out I may add a layer of thermal shirt and leggings so I have maximum layers to deal with the possible chill. At this time last year I was still covering my hair and wearing cloth caps but I've chosen to stop. I don't think it did much to change how people perceive my age - I was asked quite a few times, mostly by older people, if it was some new kids' fashion. Comfy uniform is completed with an active band on my glasses, my necklace, and my crossbody bag when I go out. 

 

I buy most of my clothes from charity shops. All my fleeces, my blazers, most of my skirts are charity shop finds. I typically use eBay if I want something specific or unusual like the kilts. I know but always check my measurements before ordering and have gained a good eye and understanding for what works for me and what I'll actually wear -- everything is better with pockets, always buy the larger size if on the cusp, good materials for me are lighter layerable tuff rather than thick, no fake pockets, colours I like - bright tops and dark bottoms - and what I won't wear like white, and deep pockets. I can't recall the last time I shopped in a department store - a lot of them have clearance eBay stores anyways now. DH picks up basics like socks and boxers when he goes grocery shoppings and I occasionally set something for click and collect if I or one of the kids want specific kinds but otherwise charity shops and eBay do me well. I've no idea what department any of my clothes would be in.

 

I don't think I'll ever be too old for sparkles though. My current ankle length skirt has a lovely red and gold band around the bottom hem and my spouse bought me my favourite blue sandstone necklace because I loved how it looks like shiny stars in the light.  I also have a light-up colour changing light saber umbrella so maturity is not my top priority in my appearance, or at least not higher than good visibility and fun. 

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Yes. I usuallt wear jeans or yoga pants and a plain shirt. No patterns or buttons or pockets or glitter or ruffles or whatever. just plain. this has always been my look even before kids. as plain as possible. if im not looking plain i feel super uncomfortable.

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