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s/o - do you expect to be able to contact your kids at any time?


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As the title says.

 

My kids generally have an area they are allowed to be in, and they can go where they want within that as long as they are home on time.  For ds7 and dd9 that is the length of the side street if outside or they can go in certain kids houses.

 

If I want them, I have to shout or go looking but they are easy enough to find.

 

For dd12, she is allowed to go to more places, but the idea is the same - as long as she is home on time she can go where she likes.  I may or may not be able to get hold of her.

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No.  They spend most of their time supervised e.g. in school or activities, during which time I would not need to reach them under normal circumstances.  If they are off on their own for fun or running an errand, we agree on a time and place to meet.  I would normally only try to contact them if something wasn't going as planned.  If they didn't answer, I'd ask why, but it's not a rule that they always have their phone on or anything like that.

 

As they get older, I don't know what the rule will be, but I'm guessing contact will only be required if some of us  aren't (or won't be) at our meeting place when planned.

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My kids have cellphones as we sometimes leave them at the library, mall food court or bookstore while we run an errand in another building less than 500 feet away or we are in another part of the mall. In those scenarios we expect them to be contactable because they are free to answer the phone.

 

If we drop them off for a class or activity, then we would expect them to be contactable 10mins after class ends since we know it is rare for their teachers to overtime more than 10mins. Besides if cellphones start ringing 10mins after class ends, the teachers won't be offended because they know it is probably the parents/caregivers calling to arrange/confirm pick up location.

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Mine are older.  They are all in their 20's, and the answer is no.  They don't have landlines, and generally turn off their phones at night.  I could probably call or text them during the day and get a response within 30 minutes or so, if necessary.  They either work or are in college, so when they check their phones is dependent on when they have a break or feel comfortable in checking their phones.  However, I could always call their place of business or college and put in an emergency call to them that way.  But at night, probably not.  (Only one leaves her phone on all night.)

 

 

Edited by J-rap
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Not really.

 

My big kids don't look at their phones while in class and that is good. My youngest is often so absorbed in his games and videos that he doesn't see messages. We have 'Find Your Friends' installed on all the phones so I can tell where they are if I need to, but that isn't quite the same.

 

When I fell and broke my ankle, my twelve year old was with me. But the big kids were in class and didn't find out about the situation for several hours. My husband knew almost immediately, but only because the meeting he was about to be in started late. He would have found out after the meeting if it had started on time.

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Ah, interesting, I hadn't thought of trying to get hold of them while in a class or activity.

 

For the most part, I could in an emergency.  They would not be able to answer a phone even if they had one, but I could always call the school or community center if it was important enough to interrupt.

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My kids know to tell me where they will be.  When my older 2 were younger they would take off and I would be in a panic driving up and down streets searching for them (they did stupid crap like ride their bikes across 4 lanes of busy highway to chase a rainbow at ages 10 and11, go into farmer's fields to interact with the horses etc once we moved out here to the country.  in the city they would go to the lake, or the library, or the various parks, or in the case of my oldest he would go in search of an elevator) etc.  So it became very clear I need to know where they are, they let me know so that if I need them I can find them quickly.  Only dd17 has a cell so otherwise they are out of contact range.  I do expect that when I go to work and have left them all at home I am able to get ahold of either dd17 on her phone or one of them on the houseline if I call from work.  If for some reason they are all heading out somewhere (rare) they call or fb message me to inform me so I know. 

They have limited rules other than don't break the law and don't be a dick. As long as I know where they are, and youngest is home for dinner and bath etc I am easy going about it.  So not instantly able to contact, I will need to walk or drive to where they are to do so but I can do so within a reasonable timeframe.

I will say small town living has it's advantages, I have been known to call the library for instance if I know say ds13 is there while I work and a pass a message on to him via the librarian, but that is usually reserved for those times when just sending him a fb message wouldn't suffice, so rare.

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