MDL Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 I have used Konos (only a bit, very difficult to implement for me), We Choose Virtues, Character First, Character Badges and the Beautiful Feet book guide. Nothing has really stuck so far. Now I'm looking at Laying Down the Rails and Kids of Integrity. My boys are 12 and 7, and we are struggling with Trust, Obedience, kindness and Attentiveness. We are basically a mess, as our foundation seems to be lacking! What would you do next? (We are very spiritual, believe God is the Source of all things....probably Unitarian if I have to label it) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
forty-two Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 We are basically a mess, as our foundation seems to be lacking! What would you do next? (We are very spiritual, believe God is the Source of all things....probably Unitarian if I have to label it) WRT the foundation for character training, my understanding of building character has been formed by virtue ethics (which is similar to how the Circe Institute thinks of it). So character is built from the outside in: what you do (practicing virtue, or practicing vice) forms who you are, and who you are forms what you do. (As I understand it, Laying Down the Rails has a similar habit-training view of building character.) However, practicing the virtues, forming a good character, isn't an end in itself, but is a *means* to an end - namely, the end of living a good, worthy human life. But not everyone has the same idea of what constitutes a good, worthy human life - different religions, different traditions aim toward different ultimate ends - and so not everyone has the *same* virtues. Because the foundation for why *these* virtues (and not others, or just not bothering to build character at all) is rooted in why *this way of living life* (and not others). So your answer to "what is the point of life? how should people live life and why?" is the foundation for "what are the virtues that guide you in the path of good living? why should I be virtuous even when it's hard and unpleasant in the short term?" (Answer: because it is good in the long term, because it is *how* you life a good life - and for that answer to be compelling, generic you needs to be able to clearly explain both what a good life *is*, why you should live that life, and how these particular virtues form you into a person who is increasingly capable of living that good life.) It's easy to jump right into the nitty-gritty of teaching specific virtues, cultivating particular character traits - without ever thinking about how it fits into the larger picture. *What* does good character even look like, and *why* should we act that way? All those virtues and character traits embody a particular view of what it means to be human and how humans ought to live. I'm Christian, and our answer to "why be kind?", for example, is rooted in the Bible. God created us for a reason - to live in communion with Him - and His Law tells us what that life looks like. (It also tells us that we failed to live in communion with God, that we failed to live a good life, and what God has done to save us and bring us back into communion with Him through Jesus' life, death, and resurrection - and the reality of our restored communion with God in Christ materially shapes how we handle our continuing failures to live in communion with God.) So the answer to "why be kind?" is "the Golden Rule", is because "we are to love our neighbor as ourselves" - and the answer to "why care about God's Law?" is because we are God's redeemed people, and we ought to do what His redeemed people are to do. I root most of my character training in the Ten Commandments, which in my tradition (Lutheran) are considered as a summary of all the Law, the core of "what has God given us to do? What does it look like to "love others"?" The explanations of the Commandments in Luther's Small Catechism do a great job of explaining both the negative (don't do this!) part and the positive (do this!) part of the Commandments, and along with the rest of the Catechism form the core of my character teaching. We're Christians, and so character training is part of "learning how to live as Christ's people" and is rooted in what it means to live as Christ's people and why we should therefore live that way. Does that help any? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
macmacmoo Posted March 27, 2017 Share Posted March 27, 2017 well free is free so while only covers two you listed Character First education has a very very slowly growing collection of free guides: http://characterfirsteducation.com/c/curriculum.php My favorite things about them is that it list five "I will"s for each guide because I feel that with my kiddos they need really simple tangible "what does this virtue want me to do?" might be worth trying before shelling out for something else or at least give you more time to find tune what you are looking for. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MDL Posted March 28, 2017 Author Share Posted March 28, 2017 well free is free so while only covers two you listed Character First education has a very very slowly growing collection of free guides: http://characterfirsteducation.com/c/curriculum.php My favorite things about them is that it list five "I will"s for each guide because I feel that with my kiddos they need really simple tangible "what does this virtue want me to do?" might be worth trying before shelling out for something else or at least give you more time to find tune what you are looking for. Thanks, Macmac. We have been through most Character First traits. I too love the positive affirmations of the I will statements. We tried out Kids of Integrity Honesty this morning and by the time I edited out statements that paint a fearful, vengeful God, there wasn't so much left. We believe God is all Love, all Light, and judges no one. Anyhow, I don't really mean to go down a religion hole. Maybe I'll just order LDTR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lanalouwho Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 There is a fairly extensive sample of Laying Down the Rails available. Maybe OT can give you a better idea of if it will work for you. Sent from my HTCD160LVW using Tapatalk 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amyc78 Posted March 28, 2017 Share Posted March 28, 2017 Thanks, Macmac. We have been through most Character First traits. I too love the positive affirmations of the I will statements. We tried out Kids of Integrity Honesty this morning and by the time I edited out statements that paint a fearful, vengeful God, there wasn't so much left. We believe God is all Love, all Light, and judges no one. Anyhow, I don't really mean to go down a religion hole. Maybe I'll just order LDTR. I'm pretty sure LDTR has a Christian basis but I may be wrong... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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