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The advice that comes to mind right now is that you should continue with the IEP process this spring while you are still homeschooling. You may not want to tell the school that you plan to enroll him in the fall until later in the process. My experience with the schools is that they tend to balk at evaluating enrolled students until the student has been in their classroom for a period of time, so that they can see for themselves how he functions. They may very well say that they won't evaluate him until AFTER he is enrolled, if you reveal that that is your plan.


Yes, they have a mandate to evaluate children who are suspected of having a disability, even if they are not enrolled. But my school district played an unexpected little trick, where they documented that they did not suspect a disability, due to having no classroom data from a teacher in their school (having teacher input is in the federal law, which was their loophole). Even though we handed over stacks of documentation from neuropsych and other evaluations, with diagnoses clearly stated.


Your experience might not go that way. I would hope not. But I've learned to be really cautious about trusting the school, because they have their own agenda that does not always line up with what is best for the individual child.


Once they have evaluated him as a homeschooler, you can say that now that you see his level of disability, you plan to put him in school in the fall. Hopefully this way, he can enter the doors in the fall with an IEP already in place.

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Also, do not tell them that you blame yourself in any way. Sure, it is natural to feel that way, as a parent. BUT the school can also deny evaluations or an IEP on the grounds that the child has not been properly taught.


You do not want that to happen.


Instead, document the different ways that you have adjusted your curriculum choices to meet his needs, because he was not able to progress in a typical manner.


DS who has a math disability also forgets what he has learned. It is part of his disability, not a fault of the teaching he has received. I did feel badly that I didn't realize he had forgotten so many things, but the actual forgetting was part of the disability and not the fault of my teaching.


Be sure to mention forgetting as a symptom of a possible disability.


Also, schools are generally reluctant to have students repeat a grade. It may very well be the best choice, but the school will weigh in on what they think. If he is less mature than his peers, lagging academically, can still graduate at age 18 or 19, and will not feel demoralized by the shift, making an adjustment might be a good option. You may find that it isn't necessary or recommended.


Also, :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:


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Don't beat yourself up too badly. It's entirely possible (and even probable) that he would be no better off had he been enrolled in public school, because not only would his education be behind but he very likely would have emotional baggage tagged on it. I jump around with my dyslexic, dysgraphic, ADHD, executive function disorder, kiddo with vision issues all the time hoping for better, and yes he would be better off in some ways in the right school, but that school isn't the one he would have to attend.


Request testing in writing. First and foremost. Document each and every contact you have with the school at the moment it occurs.


We had issues getting testing but once we got started in the process, the psychologist became our best friend and biggest ally and even though I'm homeschooling, he supports us and helps us (even though he could lose his job in doing so). Hopefully you will find an ally in the process. Good luck to you. You might consider posting in the Learninf Challenges board!

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