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My 9yo DS has started making a habit out of inturupting the lesson I am giving to talk about totally unrelated things. The majority of times it doesn't even have to do with school. When this initially started I explained to him that it was disrespectful. I have asked him before if he was back at his private school if he would interupt his teacher there to talk about (insert subject) and he always answers me NO. I have gone as far as giving him the assignment he needs to complete because he already must know the answers to it all if he doesn't need to listen to me and letting him fail. Nothing seems to make a difference to him. I am pulling my hair out. This disrespect has to STOP! I am at a loss of what to do next any suggestions?? I don't expect him to be silent the entire day and NEVER talk, but when I am teaching him something I want all attention on the work at hand.

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Does it happen during certain subjects? Maybe he'd prefer more of a 'discussion' approach to some subjects, rather than a lecture-approach. My dc enjoy asking questions and making comments as they learn. Occasionally they do get very off-topic, but I just remind them of the topic. Or just ignore it and ask a question about the lesson. When they realize that no, we aren't going to talk about lego cars right now, they stay on the topic better.

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If the questions seem genuine, have him keep a piece of paper and pencil nearby, and write down questions he wants to ask *at the end of the lesson.*

 

You could also give him 3 marbles. Each marble represents 1 question he gets to ask during the lesson. After he's used all 3 marbles, he's to listen quietly until the end.

 

If it seems more like a habit- like he's forgetting himself, then place a cup with 10 marbles in it on the table. Explain that he's gotten himself into a habit of interrupting and you both are going to work on breaking the habit. Every time he interrupts you say nothing, ignore his interruption, but remove one marble from his cup. (Explain what you'll be doing ahead of time.) Each marble taken out is 5 minutes he has to spend laying quietly on your bed after the lesson. It shouldn't take more than a couple of days for those marbles to become precious!

 

Hillary

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Thank you both so much for answering this. I really do want to keep school fun, but it seems like we are spending too much time trying to get through a lesson. I am going to implement theses ideas and hopefully we will have a smoother week. I know he is more than capable of staying on task because he has done it in the past. Praying and deep breathing to get me through this stage.

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If I am having a discussion with someone else DS rarely interrupts. When he does I say, "Excuse me! I'm in the middle of a conversation right now and unless this is an emergency you are going to have to wait until we are done." Usually that's the end of it. He waits till we are finished or runs off to play and we chat later. I think part of the problem is the fact it is only the two of us here and he has a hard time switching from "Schooltime" and free time.

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If I am having a discussion with someone else DS rarely interrupts. When he does I say, "Excuse me! I'm in the middle of a conversation right now and unless this is an emergency you are going to have to wait until we are done." Usually that's the end of it. He waits till we are finished or runs off to play and we chat later. I think part of the problem is the fact it is only the two of us here and he has a hard time switching from "Schooltime" and free time.

 

Have you been peeking through my drapes? That's not you and your son that's me and my dd. The first thing I was going to ask was is he the only student. My dd is (although we now have an infant).

 

She does the same thing and if she does it while adults are talking we handle it EXACTLY the way you do.

 

I have come to realize with my dd it means she has come to the end of her attentions span for that subject or she needs a break.

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Home *is* a less formal setting than an outside class, church, etc.

 

I would encourage you to stop thinking of it as disrespect (as I doubt that is the *heart* behind it). Instead, I'd give him a "do-over" chance.

 

Code words would work great for this; you can find them at my site.

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I have a dd that will stop mid-assignment and talk. My Sunday School kids are notorious for this too.

 

Something I found that works is making sure there is time for free discussion both before and after the lesson, assignment, whatever. Then, I give a reminder that we had our free discussion time and we can have more if we get on with the lesson and finish in time.

 

You could try a point system. For every time he listens attentively, he gets 3 points. For every time he interrupts he gets -1. At the end of the week, how ever many points he has earned can be cashed in for privileges, ice cream, whatever. If he has negative points you could come up with consequences if you want. I've never had to go that far. ;)

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If I am having a discussion with someone else DS rarely interrupts. When he does I say, "Excuse me! I'm in the middle of a conversation right now and unless this is an emergency you are going to have to wait until we are done." Usually that's the end of it. He waits till we are finished or runs off to play and we chat later. I think part of the problem is the fact it is only the two of us here and he has a hard time switching from "Schooltime" and free time.

 

Well, but he's still interrupting, whether you call it "school time" or "free time," yes? So I'd just correct him for interrupting, the same as any other time; IOW, I'd say, "Son, you may not interrupt me when I'm talking, unless you are bleeding out your eyeballs." I don't believe it's necessary to differentiate between *this* time and *that* time.

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