I'm getting desperate here...

[mom of 2 boys]

I'm getting pretty desperate over here. If you don't already know, I have two children with autism and I'm homeschooling the older one who is school aged. My two year old was just diagnosed with apraxia as well, so his therapy services are increasing, and I'm losing my mind trying to manage everything. I'm looking into putting my 5 year old in school and it really doesn't look good. He does have an IEP in place for us to fall back on if need be, but the school he was placed in has a bad reputation for special education. In fact, they are currently being sued by the parents of a special needs child for something horrible that happened due to their negligence. His class would have 23 children in it with pull outs a few times per day (if that) for resource and various therapies. I have absolutely no idea how they concluded that this was an appropriate placement for him, being that he required a shared 1:2 aide (after graduating from a 1:1) in a preschool class of only NINE children, and even then he could barely get through the day without various behavioral issues. As it is now, I can't even drop him off for homeschool classes (gym, swim, art) without having a 1:1 aide with him. What am I supposed to do? I can't put him in a placement that I already know is doomed to failure, what good would that do? I don't have the energy to throw a fit over it right now either. 

 

He's currently up for re-evaluation (not scheduled yet) and they have a whole huge list of things that they (school district) are going to evaluate, so maybe that will do us some good, maybe not. I consented for it because I figured that it can't hurt, and it's free. Not to mention, I'm kind of curious about the whole thing. He hasn't had an evaluation in a few years. 

 

Our area has an autism program that has a decent reputation, but as far as I know, our school district would have to recommend it before we could even tour the class. They have never even met my son before, so I can't see that happening. Even still, this program is in high demand, so I doubt he would get a placement anyway. 

 

So what can I do? I WANT to homeschool him, but I just cannot keep going on like this. I am willing to do just about anything, even move, if that would make a difference. We live in the middle of nowhere, so it might :( At the very least, I'd have an easier time hiring people to come in and help me. I'm honestly considering renting an apartment just to get closer to town, and then worrying about the house after I catch my breath. Is that insane? I can't even think straight enough to know if that's insane or not. 

[prairiewindmomma]

I would move.  Seriously.  You are in the early years still, and I'd do whatever I could to get into a good SN school district so that you have some breathing space. In the mean time, I'd look at what you need to do to get from here to there.  Maybe that's getting a mother's helper for the toddler or renting an apartment or getting sitters so that you get some breathing space in the evenings to make it through the next year or two.

 

 

[Starr]

You have some time to sort it out. He's only five. I would go home school, very light. Long term I agree that moving to a place with more services would be a good plan.  :grouphug:

[Lecka]

I don't know if your problem is more one of home-schooling or one more of making it through the days.

 

I would also look at moving.

 

There is never going to be a good time to move, it will never be easier until you are getting good services for him.

 

However don't give up on getting things from school when you haven't tried yet. Maybe do the meetings or whatever. Actually meet the people and get past the gatekeepers. That is IF you here it is a good program. If it isn't or you doubt he can get in, then maybe it really isn't worth the trouble. Well -- maybe move.

 

I live in an area where the school districts are spotty and patchy and moving can make a difference.... and the truth is I think it is worth moving, and people just don't know.

 

I also honestly have to be an advocate...... I am happy with things, but there have been things come up for sure, and I am not always happy, and then I am doing my best to advocate, follow up, move up the chain of command, etc. But it is worth it because there are good things, it is just not always being done just right, or maybe the default is not what I want and then I have to get from the default to the right thing. But we are in a place where this is not just beating my head against the wall if-you-know-what-I-mean. In nearby districts it would be.... a nearby district is getting sued right now and I think things will change there..... but for many people it is more realistic to move to the place that got sued 10 years ago and has a nice program as a result.... os overall people who are the type will move to my district instead of staying and suing locally, and then people who don't know what is going on as much stay to beat their heads against the wall or just send their kids to school and not pay much attention.

[Lecka]

I think it doesn't hurt to ask how you might get a placement in that program.... what are the characteristics of the kids in the program (and that kind of thing).

 

We are moving soon and will have a "transition IEP" (not positive this is the name but maybe it is the name) prior to the first day of school.

 

So maybe you take in some documentation, you know?

 

I don't know -- if you are staying it sounds like you need to conquer this hill if the program is appropriate for your son.

 

Something about programs though is maybe when you find out the characteristics it is not the right fit.... but they should have SOMETHING.

 

I also know you spoke a little poorly of the resource room thing, but would he have an aide? My son does have an aide and he is in resource a lot, but having individualized instruction (and at this point it is quality and appropriate instruction..... I have complained a bit to make this happen, to be honest, and I HAVE to follow up to make sure it stays this way.... I HAVE to follow up).

 

But anyway ----- if you don't know the details, I do wonder if it might be okay.

 

But my son qualifies for aide support so I know it is different for kids who don't.

 

But if you are this worried -- my gut says "you are this worried, it sounds like he will qualify for an aide." I mean -- maybe, right?

 

But if you are in a good place with better services you will have better aides at school, in my opinion. B/c where I am, aides network and the ones who are trying to grow professionally want to be at the schools with more training, more support (for the aides), and things like that.

 

But anyway -- I was at a very low point to be honest and I think right now you need to DO something dramatic, b/c your energy reserves are not going to get replenished until your son is in a good program and getting good services.

 

The pre-school you have described him in ----- it sounds bad, and if that is in the same district as this program you are hearing about -- I wonder if it is that good, b/c this pre-school wasn't, and they are in the same district (if they are).

 

But if it is in a neighboring district -- I have heard similar things (can't engage child, child not engaged, etc) about a neighboring school district's special ed pre-school, but it is better here. But I think the pre-school is representative of the services in that district as a whole.

 

B/c the autism stuff is specific, and takes training, and they are doing it or they aren't.

[Stibalfamily]

First I am sending you some hugs. You have a tough job. My older son was diagnosed with apraxia and we had so many appointments between speech, physical and occupational therapy. At one point I was juggling 7 appointments during the week. When you have a special needs child it seems like your whole life revolves around therapy and you have a double load. When I set up my older son's IEP originally, I bought a bunch of books on Amazon dealing with school districts and IEP's. It helped knowing my rights and their responsibilities. However, what you are saying doesn't sound good. If you can get into a better district, then I would. Is it possible to school your older one in the mornings and then have your appointments for the two year old in the afternoon? I know that it would be a tough schedule. But with 23 other kids, I doubt he/she would learn much anyways. I hope you get it all figured out. My heart goes out to you though. If you have questions about how you can help you son with Apraxia, pm me. There is so much out there and lots of different therapies. We used Kaufman cards, I even bought a set at home. We also used a bunch of iPad apps as well to do therapy at home. 

[mom of 2 boys]

I don't know if your problem is more one of home-schooling or one more of making it through the days.

 

I would also look at moving.

 

There is never going to be a good time to move, it will never be easier until you are getting good services for him.

 

However don't give up on getting things from school when you haven't tried yet. Maybe do the meetings or whatever. Actually meet the people and get past the gatekeepers. That is IF you here it is a good program. If it isn't or you doubt he can get in, then maybe it really isn't worth the trouble. Well -- maybe move.

 

I live in an area where the school districts are spotty and patchy and moving can make a difference.... and the truth is I think it is worth moving, and people just don't know.

 

I also honestly have to be an advocate...... I am happy with things, but there have been things come up for sure, and I am not always happy, and then I am doing my best to advocate, follow up, move up the chain of command, etc. But it is worth it because there are good things, it is just not always being done just right, or maybe the default is not what I want and then I have to get from the default to the right thing. But we are in a place where this is not just beating my head against the wall if-you-know-what-I-mean. In nearby districts it would be.... a nearby district is getting sued right now and I think things will change there..... but for many people it is more realistic to move to the place that got sued 10 years ago and has a nice program as a result.... os overall people who are the type will move to my district instead of staying and suing locally, and then people who don't know what is going on as much stay to beat their heads against the wall or just send their kids to school and not pay much attention.

 

Thanks, this is a problem of making it through the days. Homeschooling is completely fine. My son is most likely gifted, so teaching him is easy, and he would sit and do school all day long if I had the time. We were even able to set up a beautiful school room for him, and it almost brings me to tears to think that I can't handle it. 

 

I'm just...I'm doing way, way too much, and school is the only option that I can really think of to get some of this off my plate. I hate the thought that he would have to suffer for it, because he is really doing better at home than he did in preschool. 

[mom of 2 boys]

I think it doesn't hurt to ask how you might get a placement in that program.... what are the characteristics of the kids in the program (and that kind of thing).

 

We are moving soon and will have a "transition IEP" (not positive this is the name but maybe it is the name) prior to the first day of school.

 

So maybe you take in some documentation, you know?

 

I don't know -- if you are staying it sounds like you need to conquer this hill if the program is appropriate for your son.

 

Something about programs though is maybe when you find out the characteristics it is not the right fit.... but they should have SOMETHING.

 

I also know you spoke a little poorly of the resource room thing, but would he have an aide? My son does have an aide and he is in resource a lot, but having individualized instruction (and at this point it is quality and appropriate instruction..... I have complained a bit to make this happen, to be honest, and I HAVE to follow up to make sure it stays this way.... I HAVE to follow up).

 

But anyway ----- if you don't know the details, I do wonder if it might be okay.

 

But my son qualifies for aide support so I know it is different for kids who don't.

 

But if you are this worried -- my gut says "you are this worried, it sounds like he will qualify for an aide." I mean -- maybe, right?

 

But if you are in a good place with better services you will have better aides at school, in my opinion. B/c where I am, aides network and the ones who are trying to grow professionally want to be at the schools with more training, more support (for the aides), and things like that.

 

But anyway -- I was at a very low point to be honest and I think right now you need to DO something dramatic, b/c your energy reserves are not going to get replenished until your son is in a good program and getting good services.

 

The pre-school you have described him in ----- it sounds bad, and if that is in the same district as this program you are hearing about -- I wonder if it is that good, b/c this pre-school wasn't, and they are in the same district (if they are).

 

But if it is in a neighboring district -- I have heard similar things (can't engage child, child not engaged, etc) about a neighboring school district's special ed pre-school, but it is better here. But I think the pre-school is representative of the services in that district as a whole.

 

B/c the autism stuff is specific, and takes training, and they are doing it or they aren't.

 

Thank you ... I did go ahead and put in a call to that program. It's after hours right now, but I left a message requesting more information and asking about the referral process. My son should have aide support, but they did not offer it. He would probably do fine sharing an aide with one other student, but nothing less than that. Some days he does need full 1:1 support, but most days he could share one. Either way, he wasn't offered an aide. Our preschools around here are not based out of districts, they are private schools that the districts fund for qualifying students. It's pretty confusing, and not everyone with a qualifying child even realizes that these private schools can be funded for them. I agree though, I feel like I need to make some kind of major change.

[mom of 2 boys]

First I am sending you some hugs. You have a tough job. My older son was diagnosed with apraxia and we had so many appointments between speech, physical and occupational therapy. At one point I was juggling 7 appointments during the week. When you have a special needs child it seems like your whole life revolves around therapy and you have a double load. When I set up my older son's IEP originally, I bought a bunch of books on Amazon dealing with school districts and IEP's. It helped knowing my rights and their responsibilities. However, what you are saying doesn't sound good. If you can get into a better district, then I would. Is it possible to school your older one in the mornings and then have your appointments for the two year old in the afternoon? I know that it would be a tough schedule. But with 23 other kids, I doubt he/she would learn much anyways. I hope you get it all figured out. My heart goes out to you though. If you have questions about how you can help you son with Apraxia, pm me. There is so much out there and lots of different therapies. We used Kaufman cards, I even bought a set at home. We also used a bunch of iPad apps as well to do therapy at home. 

 

Thank you! Yes, we currently have 5 therapy appointments for my 2 year old per week, a private nurse once per month for his medical issues and homeschool classes twice per week (I try to double these up with therapy). His speech therapist is requesting an increase, we're increasing his teacher services (assuming he'll qualify) and doing a PT eval, so we will probably be at at least 7 therapy appointments soon. Ugh! 

 

What I've been doing for school is, I've been doing lessons while my 2 year old is working with a therapist. That way he's busy and not bothering us for awhile. This has been working out pretty well, and to be honest, the actual act of sitting down and doing school work is not an issue, it's just literally everything else that goes on throughout the day. 

 

I do have questions about Apraxia, and I will try to get in touch with you about it soon. His speech therapist printed me a bunch of sheets with pictures of hand ques, but the things are like a square inch in size and photocopied a million times, so I can't make out the pictures to save my life! 

 

Anyway, thanks again. 

[PeterPan]

Get a PROMPT therapist for speech and you'll only need one day a week.  That will improve your life tremendously.

 

And yes move, but move to a state with a disability scholarship program.  That way you'll have access AND funding.

 

People get cranky when I say negative things about Kauffman, but look into PROMPT and compare.  PROMPT will be a BIG step up.

Edited December 1, 2016 by OhElizabeth

[Lecka]

I think you could have a quality homeschool experience if you moved for better services.

 

What you have right now is not adequate.

 

If you wanted public school but for it to be a quality situation ---- I would say go for that. That is what I want and what I go for.

 

But if what you want to go for is homeschool with adequate services, then I think that is what you should go for.

 

Can you go to a quiet place and think about what you want?

 

Though it sounds like in your post you want to go for homeschool with services!

 

But that can change or you see pros and cons, I know, I am not sure if your mind is made up on that or not.

 

But I think looking for the transfer to Columbia sounds like a good idea! Could you go ahead of your husband? That would be extreme but if you are thinking about moving into an apartment anyway.... maybe you are at this point where it is a consideration.

 

Getting through the days is needed now and for the next few years too, you are not thinking about crazy things. Just things that you realistically need to consider bc you are on that edge of barely making it and you just can't stay there for too long. Nobody can, it is not a good situation.

 

It is why there are places that have nice services! And then other places don't care or don't have the money to provide it, or can't find providers to live in rural areas. Etc.

 

But think about it today! It is realistic, people do it. I think do it before you are bitter, bc it seems hard to be the bitter parent of an 8-year-old just starting to get decent services -- or that is my impression.

 

It was hard on me (my son was younger though) and it is going on faith that there is something better out there and it is worth it, but I think you can get better than you have now at least.

[PeterPan]

I wouldn't say I'm bitter, haha, but I will second what Lecka is saying, that the reason we can be so emphatic about something so drastic is because we've btdt.  I am sort of at the edge of rural, and it's hard to get enough workers to have the hours of ABA I'd like to have.  If I were in a bigger city, I'd have more options.  Even though we have a very generous disability scholarship, we still need the options for people to hire, kwim?  And people who've btdt are more aggressive more early.  At least I am.  

 

Autism isn't the time for wishful thinking or hoping.  It's a situation where you put in plans that fit the worst case scenario and are pleasantly surprised when you can back off.

[Storygirl]

If you want an additional opinion, I don't think it is crazy at all to consider moving to be in a better school district. People do that. We may do that, if we decide that there would be a better school district for DS12 when he gets to high school age (he is sixth grade now, and we are trying to plan ahead).

 

Of course, you need to consider your family's financial situation. And I think you would not want to be too far from your husband's work (I'm assuming you have an employed spouse, though I don't think you mention that in your posts), because having him available to help is a consideration as well.

 

But if you can swing it, it is not a crazy idea.

 

And it is actually not a bad idea to rent first and make sure that you have chosen the right location. Sometimes it is hard to figure that out, and the help that you need now at these young ages may not be the same services you will want when they are older. Keeping yourself more mobile for a little while is not a bad idea.

 

We moved here about a year and a half ago. If I had known then what I know now, I might have chosen a different school district to live in. Unless you know already which district offers the best services, you might not want to tie yourself down to a house yet.

 

The other thing about renting an apartment or home is it allows you to be out of your current house while you have it on the market (I assume you would need to sell your current home).

[mom of 2 boys]

I think you could have a quality homeschool experience if you moved for better services.

 

What you have right now is not adequate.

 

If you wanted public school but for it to be a quality situation ---- I would say go for that. That is what I want and what I go for.

 

But if what you want to go for is homeschool with adequate services, then I think that is what you should go for.

 

Can you go to a quiet place and think about what you want?

 

Though it sounds like in your post you want to go for homeschool with services!

 

But that can change or you see pros and cons, I know, I am not sure if your mind is made up on that or not.

 

But I think looking for the transfer to Columbia sounds like a good idea! Could you go ahead of your husband? That would be extreme but if you are thinking about moving into an apartment anyway.... maybe you are at this point where it is a consideration.

 

Getting through the days is needed now and for the next few years too, you are not thinking about crazy things. Just things that you realistically need to consider bc you are on that edge of barely making it and you just can't stay there for too long. Nobody can, it is not a good situation.

 

It is why there are places that have nice services! And then other places don't care or don't have the money to provide it, or can't find providers to live in rural areas. Etc.

 

But think about it today! It is realistic, people do it. I think do it before you are bitter, bc it seems hard to be the bitter parent of an 8-year-old just starting to get decent services -- or that is my impression.

 

It was hard on me (my son was younger though) and it is going on faith that there is something better out there and it is worth it, but I think you can get better than you have now at least.

 

Thank you, I really would prefer to homeschool with services, which I guess would pretty much require us to move or else it's just going to be more of the same. I can take him up to the elementary school (the one with the bad reputation) for therapy services if I wanted to. He qualified for something like 6 sessions, and I believe they are about a half hour each. His preschool team reacted very poorly when we told them that we were not enrolling him in Kindergarten (it was so bad that they wrote an apology note the next day.) Based on that, I sincerely doubt anyone would be willing to work with us on making it do-able, so I am just betting that signing up for services at the school would mean having 6 appointments sporadically scheduled throughout the week. I can't see that happening, nor can I see it improving the quality of our lives in any way. As it is, he was refusing to participate in the preschool therapy sessions towards the end, so he would probably get nothing out of it at all. 

 

I am considering flying out to Ohio (by myself) to look around. I keep going around in circles trying to figure out what is best. I think it might help to actually look at the place in person. If I am understanding this correctly, as a homeschooling family qualifying for that scholarship, we could hire an in home ABA provider? Could you (or anyone) give me an idea of how many hours per week a child would generally be able to receive? Is there a place where I could get more information, like a local forum? It would be a dream to get ABA. My older son has a lot of behavioral issues, which I've been able to improve on my own with the casual use of incentives, so I'm just betting that this is what's missing from our lives. 

 

Thanks again. 

[Lecka]

My opinion is "go for it."

 

You are not wanting things that are unreasonable or impossible.

 

Just not available in your current location.

[PeterPan]

Your IEP must list autism as the disabling condition, so get that done.

 

To find services go to ODE and search autism scholarship then click search for providers. They will come to you, so try to get in a county or near a county with good options. You'll be able to search by county and type of service. Franklin county will have LOTS of options. You could choose your BCBA by phone probably or come out to visit as you narrow things down.

 

Personally if you're moving I would put yourself within 15 minutes of your preferred charter school to have the CHOICE.

[mom of 2 boys]

My opinion is "go for it."

 

You are not wanting things that are unreasonable or impossible.

 

Just not available in your current location.

 

Thanks, I completely agree with you - it is SO clarifying to talk to other people about it though. 

[OneStepAtATime]

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

 

Look into moving now.  The clock is ticking.  The sooner you start looking at options the better the chances of finding something that will work AND getting there while your children are still young.  Once they hit the late elementary/pre-teen years it can be doubly difficult.

 

(FWIW, I wish with all my heart we had moved years ago.)

[kbutton]

Talk to School Choice Ohio as well. They will actually print you reports of providers for the various scholarships and locations. It's not that you can't do that yourself, but if you are strapped, it will give you a list, you can write on it to keep track of things, and you can start looking and seeing what is available. 

 

2e can make things a little more difficult, and schools here don't seem to provide ABA. It's more like you provide it with insurance. That doesn't matter if you are doing the private therapy, but it does matter when you go through the IEP process. Just tuck that away for future reference. He will have to qualify on some other basis than behavior more than likely, and then the provider will file the paperwork to get ABA services. I think there is probably more than one way to skin that cat, but I didn't know until recently that people who have the ABA tutors and aides in school have them through insurance or private services somehow. My son is 2e and qualifies as a student with autism via social skills deficits (that often don't show up that early because the bar is low for the younger kids). That's in the speech category in school. Once he qualified, they added composition and math goals to his IEP. His provider adds on the ABA services. It's a little indirect.

 

Check out the Board of Developmental Disabilities for services as well. Depending the disability, the child may get funds, services, or get on a waiver waiting list for funding (that's an entirely different ball of wax, but something that could be appropriate depending on what your child needs). 

[Storygirl]

If you do move, be sure to pick a school district that has a good reputation for serving kids with autism, even if you don't plan to use the school district right now. Because you never know if your circumstances might change, so that you have to consider public school.

 

And also because it is the public school that writes the IEP. And the services that you get in the IEP completely depend on what each individual school district does for their students. So a student in X school district and a student in Y district with the same disabilities might have really different IEPs. 

 

Some districts are reluctant to designate autism as the disabling condition, even if the child has an autism diagnosis, as long as they can find another LD to list on the IEP instead. It can be a big problem, and it can make a huge difference in the amount of scholarship money you would receive. (Different disabilities receive different dollar amounts, with autism being the highest level of funding).

 

This is why OhE says to make sure your IEP says autism is the disabling condition before you move. Once you move, the new school district will revamp the IEP to meet their district's standards, so they can change things. But if you have that autism qualifier already in place, it will make it easier for you to argue that it should remain the qualifying condition.

 

 

[Storygirl]

Also, I don't know if you have other reasons to consider moving to Ohio... job, family, whatever .... but Ohio is not the only state with a disability scholarship program, so be sure to look into all of the viable options.

[mom of 2 boys]

Talk to School Choice Ohio as well. They will actually print you reports of providers for the various scholarships and locations. It's not that you can't do that yourself, but if you are strapped, it will give you a list, you can write on it to keep track of things, and you can start looking and seeing what is available. 

 

2e can make things a little more difficult, and schools here don't seem to provide ABA. It's more like you provide it with insurance. That doesn't matter if you are doing the private therapy, but it does matter when you go through the IEP process. Just tuck that away for future reference. He will have to qualify on some other basis than behavior more than likely, and then the provider will file the paperwork to get ABA services. I think there is probably more than one way to skin that cat, but I didn't know until recently that people who have the ABA tutors and aides in school have them through insurance or private services somehow. My son is 2e and qualifies as a student with autism via social skills deficits (that often don't show up that early because the bar is low for the younger kids). That's in the speech category in school. Once he qualified, they added composition and math goals to his IEP. His provider adds on the ABA services. It's a little indirect.

 

Check out the Board of Developmental Disabilities for services as well. Depending the disability, the child may get funds, services, or get on a waiver waiting list for funding (that's an entirely different ball of wax, but something that could be appropriate depending on what your child needs). 

 

Thanks, yeah, he is really in a league of his own. His academic skills are a year or two advanced, but his self care skills are a year or two delayed. Add in the impulse/attention/behavioral issues - no one seems to know what to do with him. I think that some kind of behavioral therapy program combined with homeschooling could work for all of us. Maybe they could even get him out into the community and work on some of our *real* problems. That would be amazing. OF COURSE - those services don't exist here. I'm doing a lot of research on Ohio. I haven't come up with any deal breakers, or even any negatives, really. We have nothing to lose here, so this very well could be the answer I've been looking for. The ONLY question I have about the state of Ohio is - Autism Speaks listed it as one of the worst states to be in for autism. How can that be? It's looking unbelievably good from where I stand. 

[mom of 2 boys]

If you do move, be sure to pick a school district that has a good reputation for serving kids with autism, even if you don't plan to use the school district right now. Because you never know if your circumstances might change, so that you have to consider public school.

 

And also because it is the public school that writes the IEP. And the services that you get in the IEP completely depend on what each individual school district does for their students. So a student in X school district and a student in Y district with the same disabilities might have really different IEPs. 

 

Some districts are reluctant to designate autism as the disabling condition, even if the child has an autism diagnosis, as long as they can find another LD to list on the IEP instead. It can be a big problem, and it can make a huge difference in the amount of scholarship money you would receive. (Different disabilities receive different dollar amounts, with autism being the highest level of funding).

 

This is why OhE says to make sure your IEP says autism is the disabling condition before you move. Once you move, the new school district will revamp the IEP to meet their district's standards, so they can change things. But if you have that autism qualifier already in place, it will make it easier for you to argue that it should remain the qualifying condition.

 

Yes, I checked his IEP and autism is already listed as the disabling condition :) 

 

And yes, I will make sure we're in the right school district. I want to have back up plans for my back up plans. We're also going to rent for a LONG time. Aside from the flexibility that it provides, it will honestly just be so nice to not have to worry about the responsibilities of home ownership for awhile. I'm so over it. Looks like the rental rates are beyond reasonable there too, so that's just another bonus. 

[mom of 2 boys]

Also, I don't know if you have other reasons to consider moving to Ohio... job, family, whatever .... but Ohio is not the only state with a disability scholarship program, so be sure to look into all of the viable options.

 

Thanks, you wouldn't happen to know where I can find out which other states have disability scholarships, would you? Whenever I try to search for it, my results are all clouded by college scholarships. It will probably end up being Ohio for us regardless though, my husband's job has a location there. 

[kbutton]

Thanks, you wouldn't happen to know where I can find out which other states have disability scholarships, would you? Whenever I try to search for it, my results are all clouded by college scholarships. It will probably end up being Ohio for us regardless though, my husband's job has a location there. 

 

You will probably need to search the department of education website for each state to be sure. 

[kbutton]

Thanks, yeah, he is really in a league of his own. His academic skills are a year or two advanced, but his self care skills are a year or two delayed. Add in the impulse/attention/behavioral issues - no one seems to know what to do with him. I think that some kind of behavioral therapy program combined with homeschooling could work for all of us. Maybe they could even get him out into the community and work on some of our *real* problems. That would be amazing. OF COURSE - those services don't exist here. I'm doing a lot of research on Ohio. I haven't come up with any deal breakers, or even any negatives, really. We have nothing to lose here, so this very well could be the answer I've been looking for. The ONLY question I have about the state of Ohio is - Autism Speaks listed it as one of the worst states to be in for autism. How can that be? It's looking unbelievably good from where I stand. 

 

Sometimes ratings are based on things that don't apply to you personally. It may be location, location, location. I am sure there are probably huge areas in the state where there are basically no services. 

 

Okay, I looked at one article on Autism Speaks: https://www.autismspeaks.org/about-us/press-releases/10-best-places-live-if-you-have-autism   I am not really sure what employer flexibility has to do with a state's ratings. It seems unreasonable to ding a whole state for something that varies by employer. Also, one of the best cities in the top ten is an Ohio city, which seems inconsistent with a low rating for the whole state. The article discusses individual things that made people satisfied or dissatisfied. I would consider those things by looking at a specific area in a state where you think you might move. I would also rank those in importance to your own family. It also sounds like schools are the deal-breaker or maker for a lot of survey respondents.

 

If ASD is already the qualifying condition on an existing IEP, I would think that could go a long way for getting appropriate scholarship options.

 

As for county services, Ohio qualifies individuals based on the OEDI/COEDI. They have to demonstrate functional disability in a certain number of areas in order to get county/state assistance. It sounds like your son has some IQ independent areas of disability, which makes him more likely to qualify. The kids I know of typical or nearly typical IQ (teenagers in this case) that qualify do so because of things like not understanding the value of money (2 cents might as well be 20 dollars), or they can't manage meds, tasks of daily living, etc. 

 

This is an Ohio-based resource that people really seem to like: http://ocali.org/  

[PeterPan]

Even though the IEP won't say ABA, you'll still get ABA.  The autism scholarship is flexible, and they'll get it one way or another.  If you have behavioral goals or academic goals or whatever, they'll just piggyback it. 

 

I think your problem with analyzing a large state is that it's going to vary.  Where I live, I have access, within say a 1 hour drive (which most people would do) to at least *3* major autism charter schools.  I kid you not.  They're all very different, all staffed with great people.  If I lived 45 minutes farther away, I would have NOTHING. There are no providers on the scholarship provider list for those counties, no autism charter schools, NOTHING.  And I've pointed that out to you that you can put yourself in a town and get there and realize something you REALLY WANT access to is farther than you want to drive.

 

IF you are in large locus areas, you're going to have amazing resources.  IF you're farther out, it could be shockingly slim pickings. So it's not homogenous across the state.  The state is very large and too diverse. We have coal mining country and amish country and big cities and areas that are nothing but fields.  It depends where you are.

 

The scholarship helps a lot, but it's only useful if you situate yourself where you can use it.  You can ask a provider to get added to the scholarship.  That works fine.  So you could find a BCBA and get them to apply and get themselves added, sure.  But still I can definitely imagine areas where it is slim pickings for finding a BCBA.

 

They use ABA to bridge the social thinking issues behind the behaviors.  My ds is very much like what you're describing.  He's gifted and he wakes up SO ON, like he's just GONE, out the door.  If he's having a hard day or very into his world, that can be very, very hard to connect with and get through!  And he has regressions with certain things, like losing his grandma, ugh. So it's a process.  But for us, bringing in that behaviorist (BCBA is the certified version) and getting the ABA hours is what we needed.  And they'll help you find a way to get it covered, no matter what is in your IEP.  The provider can add goals. The autism scholarship is the most flexible scholarship. As long as it looks sensible, they can add it and it will go through, no problem. 

[PeterPan]

When we qualified through our local board of disabilities (which gives a small amount of additional funding), they looked at a variety of areas.  It should list the areas on the website for the county.  Self-care was definitely one of them!  They go through a list of questions, and they're looking for what is age-typical.  So it was things like could he call for help if he had a problem, can he make himself a snack, can he dress himself, can he remember to brush his teeth and actually do it, can he do chores, etc. And even though they circle yes/no, they listen to your nuances and make notes. 

 

So it's true that an older dc might have enough skills that they don't qualify.  Right now, my ds qualifies.  No matter what, it's worth doing.  It gives you the chance to connect with someone locally and find resources, and it may get you a little more funding.  They also have a state-maintained list for respite care.  Thankfully, I FINALLY have someone who can do someone for us (my MIL passed and had been our person before), but basically it's an online listing and they answer your queery and you interview and decide whether to hire.  You totally drive it and decide.  But it's definitely there as a resource, yes. And you can use your county funding to pay for it or pay for it yourself.

 

You're not going to pay for respite care with your scholarship, BUT you have a ton of flexibility on when you schedule your worker hours.  My ABA tutor comes on Sunday for 2 hours.  She wants the hours, and it gives me a break.  We do it, because it helps ds transition into Mondays better.  So is that respite or school work?  It's school work, but we scheduled it partly to give me respite.  It's win-win.  And we have large chunks during the week of in-home where I can get things done or rest or run errands or whatever I need.  It wasn't that way at first, because I couldn't trust he would stay on the property with her.  That took a while, kwim?  But once I was sure they were SAFE and that he wasn't going to hurt her and that he wouldn't leave beyond what she could manage, like he was sort of onboard with the plan, then I started making *little* errands and little runs.  Now I can go for a couple hours and know it's ok.  

 

So I think you're going to get there.  You'll build a team, bring in workers, and with time it will come together.  You'll find ways to use the workers to accomplish what you need.  And yes, if you need an aide for things, they can come.  We've talked about that for Sunday School for ds.  I haven't pulled the trigger on it, but it has been on the table.  When you have college age workers, they want money, and they'll show up, lol.

[Lecka]

I know someone from my town moved to Minnesota last year and another person is considering Minnesota. I think they have other reasons to move to Minnesota in both cases, but they will have better services than here. Neither are homeschoolers.