Jump to content

Menu

18 year old Austrian Suing Parents for Facebook Photos posted over Time


TranquilMind
 Share

Recommended Posts

I had a good laugh at the fact that the girl's photos will be publicized all over international media because of this.

 

On a more serious note, I honestly don't know what should be done when parents post photos of three year olds eating their own poop and those kids are still haunted by those pictures when trying to land a job as adults.

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

http://www.msn.com/en-us/lifestyle/family-relationships/a-woman-is-suing-her-parents-for-posting-embarrassing-childhood-photos-to-facebook/ar-BBwafPg?li=BBnbfcL

 

 

Well, this is different. It's going to trial! They can't even come to some kind of agreement! Wow.

I'm torn. Because I can't count how often I've seen pictures on the net of children by their parents that the parents think are funny and heck I think are funny too, but it makes me feel... Unsettled for their parent/child relationship? bc I think how glad I am that my entire childhood wasn't digitized for mass consumption and amusement. I mean we all probably grew up hearing funny stories about when we were little. But they mostly stayed in house or in the family/close friends circle, kwim? We could go to school in 2nd grade and not wonder if our teacher saw/heard it. We could get married or go to college or get a job and never give a thought to our college teacher or future boss pulling it up online. One of the reasons I'm so strict about media stuff wrt my kids is because I am disgusted by reality tv and how it plays out in reality Internet. I don't care if they'd pay me millions, I'd never do a reality segment about our large family. I think it'd be damned horrific to have a child's every moment, and it always seems to be the bad moments that get the attention, documented for eternity, embarrassing or not. Or a parents for that matter.

 

BUT. I'm the parent here. Not the kids. I don't need their permission for anything and I'm sure not going to ask the 5 yr old if it's okay to take his picture. That's equally ridiculous to me.

 

And another thing... This girl says she's tired of her parents not taking her serious. Well, it's difficult to take her ridiculousness serious. It's little kid pictures. Every parent has them. I would suspect this has nothing to do with the pictures and more to do with the fact they have a wack relationship in general. I'd respect her stance more if she just cut ties and walked away. She obviously isn't interested in having a relationship with them. And if she's embarrassed, bringing international attention to the photos is not exactly going to make them viewed less, so it seems like cutting the nose to spite her face to me.

 

If my grown child was genuinely bothered, I'd take it down.

 

If my grown child seemed to have a perpetual pickle up their arse, I'd tell them to get over themselves and maybe take some of it down.

 

Why the parents value having the pictures up over having a relationship says something. Not sure exactly what without more history. But nothing good for either side of the lawsuit.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with Murphy101, there's something off in the relationship. That said, I don't understand the father's thinking. Sure, he took the pictures. But right or wrong, his daughter finds them embarrassing. So why not respect that feeling and take the darn things down?

 

Maybe they were cute when she was kid. Not anymore, at least to her. It seems like such a simple fix. Why dig in your heels about it?

 

  • Like 14
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't know why the parents won't just take them down. If my adult child was uncomfortable with her childhood photos being on Facebook I'd remove them cause I care about my child's feelings.

 

Of the daughter was rude and harsh and demanding rather than requesting though I can easily see a parent digging in their heels.

 

I think it's an interesting case legally, there are lots of internet privacy issues that have never been ironed out.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm torn. Because I can't count how often I've seen pictures on the net of children by their parents that the parents think are funny and heck I think are funny too, but it makes me feel... Unsettled for their parent/child relationship? bc I think how glad I am that my entire childhood wasn't digitized for mass consumption and amusement. I mean we all probably grew up hearing funny stories about when we were little. But they mostly stayed in house or in the family/close friends circle, kwim? We could go to school in 2nd grade and not wonder if our teacher saw/heard it. We could get married or go to college or get a job and never give a thought to our college teacher or future boss pulling it up online. One of the reasons I'm so strict about media stuff wrt my kids is because I am disgusted by reality tv and how it plays out in reality Internet. I don't care if they'd pay me millions, I'd never do a reality segment about our large family. I think it'd be damned horrific to have a child's every moment, and it always seems to be the bad moments that get the attention, documented for eternity, embarrassing or not. Or a parents for that matter.

 

BUT. I'm the parent here. Not the kids. I don't need their permission for anything and I'm sure not going to ask the 5 yr old if it's okay to take his picture. That's equally ridiculous to me.

 

And another thing... This girl says she's tired of her parents not taking her serious. Well, it's difficult to take her ridiculousness serious. It's little kid pictures. Every parent has them. I would suspect this has nothing to do with the pictures and more to do with the fact they have a wack relationship in general. I'd respect her stance more if she just cut ties and walked away. She obviously isn't interested in having a relationship with them. And if she's embarrassed, bringing international attention to the photos is not exactly going to make them viewed less, so it seems like cutting the nose to spite her face to me.

 

If my grown child was genuinely bothered, I'd take it down.

 

If my grown child seemed to have a perpetual pickle up their arse, I'd tell them to get over themselves and maybe take some of it down.

 

Why the parents value having the pictures up over having a relationship says something. Not sure exactly what without more history. But nothing good for either side of the lawsuit.

 

Not sure if you mean taking the picture in the first place, or posting to social media. If it's the latter, I disagree with you. I think children have a right to privacy and especially when they are old enough to comprehend and communicate to you if it bothers them. 

 

I never would have thought about this, but 1 out of my 3 children is very private and gets so embarrassed when I post his pic to FB. I don't quite understand why, as he's adorable, but I respect that and almost always ask his permission first before posting. He's elementary age, BTW. I would be very embarrassed if my parents posted some of my pics on social media, especially during the tween/teen, awkward years. Those pics were awful. 

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't ask about taking their picture and I don't think I've ever asked about posting it either. I don't intend to start either.

 

If they told it me it bothered them, I'd take that into consideration and might or might not change my mind.

 

But then again, I can't fathom a child of mine feeling the need to sue me over such things either. So I guess I'm striking a healthy enough balance. Or at least healthier than the litigants in the article anyways.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't ask about taking their picture and I don't think I've ever asked about posting it either. I don't intend to start either.

 

If they told it me it bothered them, I'd take that into consideration and might or might not change my mind.

 

But then again, I can't fathom a child of mine feeling the need to sue me over such things either. So I guess I'm striking a healthy enough balance. Or at least healthier than the litigants in the article anyways.

If a grown child demanded that their pictures be taken down would you do so--or would you stand your ground even if they threatened to sue?

 

(of course I can't imagine you would ever let such an adversarial relationship with a child develop, but perhaps imagine that the child has developed mental health issues that override whatever positive relationship you had in the past)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm torn. Because I can't count how often I've seen pictures on the net of children by their parents that the parents think are funny and heck I think are funny too, but it makes me feel... Unsettled for their parent/child relationship? bc I think how glad I am that my entire childhood wasn't digitized for mass consumption and amusement. I mean we all probably grew up hearing funny stories about when we were little. But they mostly stayed in house or in the family/close friends circle, kwim? We could go to school in 2nd grade and not wonder if our teacher saw/heard it. We could get married or go to college or get a job and never give a thought to our college teacher or future boss pulling it up online. One of the reasons I'm so strict about media stuff wrt my kids is because I am disgusted by reality tv and how it plays out in reality Internet. I don't care if they'd pay me millions, I'd never do a reality segment about our large family. I think it'd be damned horrific to have a child's every moment, and it always seems to be the bad moments that get the attention, documented for eternity, embarrassing or not. Or a parents for that matter.

 

BUT. I'm the parent here. Not the kids. I don't need their permission for anything and I'm sure not going to ask the 5 yr old if it's okay to take his picture. That's equally ridiculous to me.

 

And another thing... This girl says she's tired of her parents not taking her serious. Well, it's difficult to take her ridiculousness serious. It's little kid pictures. Every parent has them. I would suspect this has nothing to do with the pictures and more to do with the fact they have a wack relationship in general. I'd respect her stance more if she just cut ties and walked away. She obviously isn't interested in having a relationship with them. And if she's embarrassed, bringing international attention to the photos is not exactly going to make them viewed less, so it seems like cutting the nose to spite her face to me.

 

If my grown child was genuinely bothered, I'd take it down.

 

If my grown child seemed to have a perpetual pickle up their arse, I'd tell them to get over themselves and maybe take some of it down.

 

Why the parents value having the pictures up over having a relationship says something. Not sure exactly what without more history. But nothing good for either side of the lawsuit.

 

I have never posted any identifiable photo of my kids ever, even when they were young enough not to have an opinion.  I can't imagine doing that. I have posted them as lumps in a huge snowfall, off in the distance, and things like that. 

 

If these parents are being asked to remove the photos, they should do so immediately.   Yes, there are photos of every child, but not photos posted of every child.  This one objects.

 

   I'm sure it is a relationship issue, to some degree, but her wishes should be respected.  I don't want ANYONE posting photos of me without my consent.  Why should she not receive the same respect?

 

 

Like you, I'm so glad that this wasn't an option in my childhood. 

 

Edited by TranquilMind
  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

So strange. I have had friends ask me not to post a picture of them they don't like, and family members, and I always respect that. It's common courtesy! the other day I posted ones from a weekend event and my mom asked me to take one down as her eyes looked weird in it or something. So I did. Whatever. No big deal. 

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd lay odds the parents are jerks.

 

The kiddo obviously had asked them to be taken down.

The parents obviously found it amusing to post embarrassing or rude pictures.

 

 

Who the heck finds it amusing to look at their teenage child and say, "I have so little respect for you that I refuse to take down pictures of you and I don't care what you think?"

 

Do I like kids suing their parents? No.

Do I think parents eventually need to legitimately show a little respect to the adulthood of young men and women? Yes.

 

Do I think adults should post pictures of other adults and refuse to take them down?  Absolutely not and this is what we're talking about, regardless of blood relation.  I'll bet just about anything those parents lose - both the court case and their relationship.

  • Like 16
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have noticed that parents tend to quit posting about potentially embarrassing things when their kids reach a certain age - sometime in preschool.  Up to then I guess it's funny or fun to share potty accidents etc., but it seems we have a fairly common threshold beyond which we rarely go.  I just found that interesting over time.  Most people don't need to be told "hey, cool it, that's a future adult you're talking about."

 

I wonder if that general threshold age varies across cultures.

 

Then there are people who are idiots and need their heads smacked.  :P

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There has to be more to the story here, don't you think?

 

I agree, she doesn't want them up, so take them down.  Will she withdraw her suit if he takes them down?  Seems like a no-brainer to me ... but then I have a brain ....

 

I have to admit that I don't ask my kids before I post photos.  However, I don't think they would be embarrassed by any photo I post.  In the rare instance that I post an "oh what a day" kind of post, I delete it soon after.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My guess is that the parents are control freaks and they are not too different from the parents who don't want their kids to have birth certificates, or learn to drive. They want all the control. ANYONE who asked me to take down any picture of them should be accommodated. I don't understand why this would come to these extremes if the parents were reasonable.

 

One definition of a bad parent is that the parent does not allow the child to grow up to be a functional adult. This has that tint to it in my mind. By keeping the pictures out there they keep the kid embarrassed and they make it harder for them to grow up.

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

There's something wrong with the father. He sounds very controlling. It's like his daughter is becoming and adult and he has to say "I still control this..." and "boy, didn't you look stupid when..."

 

I don't post a ton of pictures. My pictures are also pretty mundane : awards, playing at the beach stuff like that. And I don't tag my kids. I figure I have a responsibility to contribute very little to my DC's electronic footprints. I've never posted embarrassing pictures.

 

Employers use Google and Facebook to screen applicants. I can just imagine some embarrassing pictures of childhood being a real turnoff to some employers. So some young person isn't going to even get an interview because her dad is an a--.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Listen, if you get to the stage where your kid is willing to sue you, you're almost certainly bad parents.

 

If it's happening because you refuse to take down pictures of her from your facebook, move that to definitely bad parents. This is just not the sort of thing normal people would dig their heels in about.

 

In a normal situation, a person might be reasonable or not when they claim they're upset by their pictures being posted online, but when you say "No, I won't remove them and you can't make me" you become the unreasonable one. (Not that I think she's being unreasonable to ask that naked pictures of her be taken down - no matter how young she was in those pictures. She has a right to some bodily privacy.)

  • Like 11
Link to comment
Share on other sites

ANYONE who asked me to take down any picture of them should be accommodated.

 

I can only think of a few exceptions to this, none of which apply here.

 

1. Your picture is of a noted public figure and not super damaging to them - sorry, you're a noted public figure. I might still take it down out of good manners (especially if it's of minors or of them in a non-public situation like at a family barbecue) but I don't feel obligated.

 

2. The picture is exceptionally newsworthy - say, a picture of a riot. Okay, so you don't want your wife to know you were the notorious whoever who did whatever in the riot - well, too bad, so sad, maybe you shouldn't've been bashing that protester/dumping paint over that cop.

 

3. It's a group photo that's not particularly damaging - say, I took a picture of my kids at Coney Island and some guy happened to be just in the corner of my picture in the distance... well, it's not a picture of you, is it? It's a picture of my kids. Or maybe it's a class photo and it turns out that Michael A. is really annoyed that his hairstyle 25 years ago looked stupid - well, okay, but it's my class photo and I haven't named you in it, so....

 

(Actually, Michael A.'s hair 25 years ago was, to my mind, the coolest style ever.)

 

Of course, again, none of these apply to the specific photos she called out - her on the toilet or naked in her crib. I question the wisdom and good taste of her parents for posting those publicly in the first place, and they definitely should have removed those at her request.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

for those who think you don't need the child's permission to actually take their photograph - you obviously haven't met my aspie who will have a meltdown over his pic being taken.  if we try to do it unawares and he notices - meltdown central.  if we ask him - meltdown central.  I bribed  him to be in ONE group  photograph for my daughter's wedding.  he *really* wanted the reward, but even then - he was hiding behind my son and barely poked his head around.  it caused him to have an anxiety attack.  (and a meltdown because he thought he wasn't getting his reward since the group disbanded to move elsewhere for more shots.)

 

he was four when some relative who will remain nameless and walked into the room with their big huge slr ready to take pictures at thanksgiving dinner while we were seated at the table . . . gee thanks.  idiot.  took me 30 minutes to calm him down.

 

 

as for this case - I don't understand why the parents don't take the pictures down.  definitely evidence something is not right in the parent-child relationship.   the sad thing is, no matter how this case resolves - their relationship is likely to never be decent, let alone good.  all because the parents care more about having the pictures up on the internet then they do that their daughter is embarrassed by them.

Edited by gardenmom5
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This reminds me of a post I made here some time back.  I had accidentally come across a photo of my kids (in their swimsuits) on their nanny's fb page.  I was not her fb friend and she certainly did not ask my permission.  Opinion here was mixed as to how I should feel about that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This reminds me of a post I made here some time back.  I had accidentally come across a photo of my kids (in their swimsuits) on their nanny's fb page.  I was not her fb friend and she certainly did not ask my permission.  Opinion here was mixed as to how I should feel about that.

 

I came across the facebook page of my sister (I didn't go looking).  She was using a picture of my son as her facebook profile picture.  At that point we weren't on speaking terms, and I assume she got the picture from my dad. She had no relationship with my son either.  I was really surprised and kinda ticked off.  I felt like...get your own kid.  I just let it go, but yeah I was baffled by it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

What kind of father would post photos of his daughter, naked and/or using the toilet, on a public Facebook page to begin with??? And then to refuse to take them down when your adult daughter begs you to? I hope the father loses in court, and not only has to take down the photos but pay damages as well. What a d-bag.  :ack2:

  • Like 14
Link to comment
Share on other sites

What kind of father would post photos of his daughter, naked and/or using the toilet, on a public Facebook page to begin with??? And then to refuse to take them down when your adult daughter begs you to? I hope the father loses in court, and not only has to take down the photos but pay damages as well. What a d-bag.  :ack2:

 

That's pretty terrible.  I hope she wins.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And another thing... This girl says she's tired of her parents not taking her serious. Well, it's difficult to take her ridiculousness serious. It's little kid pictures. Every parent has them. I would suspect this has nothing to do with the pictures and more to do with the fact they have a wack relationship in general. I'd respect her stance more if she just cut ties and walked away. She obviously isn't interested in having a relationship with them. And if she's embarrassed, bringing international attention to the photos is not exactly going to make them viewed less, so it seems like cutting the nose to spite her face to me.

 

 

 

I can't express how much I disagree with this point of view. Asking someone to take potentially embarrassing pictures of myself (the girl in this case) off the internet is NOT "ridiculousness".  Her parents have posted toilet training photos of her sitting on a potty, naked. They've posted diaper change photos of her. And then they posted these photos on Facebook and made them public. 

 

In this day and age where you can Google anyone's name and come up with information on them, this has to be profoundly humiliating for a teenager or young adult. According to the articles, as a teenager, she begged them to stop and they laughed at her and ignored her. Wouldn't that sour YOUR relationship with your parents? Now that she's 18 and a legal adult, she's taking steps to have the photos legally removed. 

It's easy for you to say "just cut ties and walk away" but the pictures are still there. And anyone who knows her name and anyone who knows her parents can simply put her name into Google and see photos of her as a naked, toilet training child. 

 

Perhaps you should put toddler pictures of yourself naked on the potty on a FB page that's got 700 friends listed, with your full legal name on it, and open to public view ... and then say she's being "ridiculous". 

  • Like 10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I definitely think the Dad should just take them down.  Should she sue him, because he won't?  Probably not.  

 

In the larger discussion relating to children's social media presence, I have more to say.  This is one of my parenting pet peeves.  I really strongly desired my children not to have a social media presence until they were older.  It wouldn't set well with me if my entire childhood was posted on the internet for all time, so I have never posted anything in social media about my children.  But. . . . my mother-in-law!  :cursing:  Soon after my first was born I found out my mother-in-law had posted an extreme amount of information about the new little guy.  His entire name, all his vital statistics, hundreds of pictures of him (and horribly unflattering pictures of me & my husband.) all over the internet.  And so it has gone for the past almost 7 years.  Every visit has an in progress play-by-play with tons of pictures.  She is a nice lady and proud to show off her grand kids, but I didn't want that for them.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree with Murphy that something is simply not kosher in the relationship. She needs to walk away and develop a life differentiated from her parents, and parents need to learn some respect.

 

The lawsuit is a bit baffling because it only draws that much more attention tp that which.she apparently did not want to have more attention. Counterproductive but I suspect that the lawsuit is a symptom of deeper issues.

 

Some parents are pretty clueless and post a lot of inappropriate things. They do not care about how it affects their child. I have seen things that made me wonder if the parent had any brain cells holding hands that day or if their neurons were running feral! Yikes!

 

I do think it is getting problematic.

 

 

As a 4H leader I can tell you that in the run of things we sometimes get some less than lovely photos, some of which are definitely funny but absolutely not one unflattering pic makes it to the club website despite having media release forms for every club member. I guess we care a lot about the kids' feelings.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I feel sad for the family, girl and parents included, that their relationship is in such a state that the daughter is suing her parents, whatever the reason.  I may not have always agreed with my parents and certainly Dad and I butted heads fairly heatedly upon occasion, but I cannot imagine ever suing my parents.  I loved and respected them and knew they loved me.  For it to come to this it seems to me that the relationship is all kinds of unhealthy.

 

Separate from this particular case, with regards to posting lots of cute photos of my kids, I never, ever do on any sort of public medium.  Why?  Because once those photos are out there they may be floating around in cyberspace for.e.ver.  Not interested.  But if I were posting photos on social media, etc, and my child asked me not to I would 100% respect their wishes.  They deserve the same kind of respect I would hope I would receive from my parents/husband/siblings regarding images of me.  

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I guess I'm wondering what other options a child in this situation has. Imagine you have parents who are ______ (fill in the blank: clueless, lacking in boundaries, emotionally abusive, vindictive, mentally ill). Imagine that those parents start posting photos of you on a public website of some sort. Not cute baby/childhood photos posted at the time they occurred, but deliberately posting pictures of a teenager/young adult back when she was naked or on the toilet or with genitals in full view. Maybe because the parents are completely clueless and think it's cute or funny, or maybe because they're vindictive and want to humiliate their teen. And the parents refuse to take the photos down, because of whatever emotional issues led them to post photos like that in the first place.

 

What are your options? Is this really just a suck-it-up cause they're your parents situation . . . and . . . RESPECT. Because I see some posters saying that she shouldn't sue or that they would never sue. And I'm wondering, really? So just photos of your bits are out there forever?

 

Or do we not have a right to bodily privacy until we reach adulthood? Somehow, that doesn't seem quite right. What other legal options are there besides suing?

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I guess I'm wondering what other options a child in this situation has. Imagine you have parents who are ______ (fill in the blank: clueless, lacking in boundaries, emotionally abusive, vindictive, mentally ill). Imagine that those parents start posting photos of you on a public website of some sort. Not cute baby/childhood photos posted at the time they occurred, but deliberately posting pictures of a teenager/young adult back when she was naked or on the toilet or with genitals in full view. Maybe because the parents are completely clueless and think it's cute or funny, or maybe because they're vindictive and want to humiliate their teen. And the parents refuse to take the photos down, because of whatever emotional issues led them to post photos like that in the first place.

 

What are your options? Is this really just a suck-it-up cause they're your parents situation . . . and . . . RESPECT. Because I see some posters saying that she shouldn't sue or that they would never sue. And I'm wondering, really? So just photos of your bits are out there forever?

 

Or do we not have a right to bodily privacy until we reach adulthood? Somehow, that doesn't seem quite right. What other legal options are there besides suing?

I was assuming as I read that the photos had been posted as they were taken over the years?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I recently had a "memory" pop up from when my 7 yo was potty training where she said (there were no pics involved, because I don't post partially clothed pics at all, and generally just post your typical Easter or first day of homeschool pics) "no pee pee in my shoes. Pee pee in the potty." You can picture the cuteness of a 2 yo going around saying that all day to remind herself. I thought about sharing it again, but decided that my now 7 yo wouldn't want that shared (without even asking). If she saw pics of herself now and asked me to take them down I would. That's just respect for another human!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The parents should have taken them down if the daughter requested it.  If the daughter feels like her only recourse is lawsuit, that's just ... probably her only recourse.  

 

My personal son doesn't mind when I post cute pictures of him when he was little.  I've asked him.  But I *asked* first.  He minds a LOT more when I post current pictures.  

 

I'm awfully glad I didn't grow up in a digitized age.  I'm a bit sensitive (too much).  I can see how I would hate it if people posted ridiculous pictures of me on the internet.  It's bad enough when they post GOOD ones that look like me.  :0)  I can't imagine being a parent that would not take down pictures of someone who asked me to do so.

 

I take a lot of pictures for our parish and put them on a non-internet digital frame I got for the fellowship hall (like, 100 people will ever see this), and I send the JPGs of particularly nice ones to the people in the photos.  The kids and even the adults LOVE seeing these pics.  But one lady sent me a mail, about a hundred words long, ALL IN CAPS, half of them in bold or bold italic, with 40 exclamation points !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!! telling me that under no circumstances was I to post on our digital frame or send along the picture I took that had her in it.  

 

I about freaked out--was she in some sort of witness protection program?  Had I blown her cover?  

 

I immediately took it off the digital frame, deleted it from my database and so on.  I sent her a profuse apology, copied the priest (who also had a copy of the photo as he was in it) told her all the copies had been destroyed, I'm so sorry...etc.    

 

Turns out, she didn't like her hair that day.  :::eyeroll:::

 

Well, I'm DARNED sure she isn't in any more pictures...not even the ones of her granddaughter's baptism.  "As you wish."  I don't mean to be spiteful, but good grief...I don't need any more aggravation.

 

Or a lawsuit.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was assuming as I read that the photos had been posted as they were taken over the years?

 

Facebook didn't go public until late 2006, and I doubt that some random couple in Austria immediately jumped onto a social media site that until then had been used only by a limited number of American college students. So the girl would have been at least 8 or 9, and likely older, when her father started uploading photos of her naked, during diaper changes and potty training. Why the heck would he do that, other than to purposely humiliate his daughter??? She says there are more than 500 photos of her that her father refuses to take down. That's just twisted. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I assumed they put them up when she was older based on her age. If she's 18 now, then she was born in 1998. Not many people were mommy-blogging naked baby pictures in 1998.

You're right, this article www.thelocal.at/20160914/woman-sues-parents-for-sharing-embarrassing-childhood-photos-on-facebook says they started posting photos on Facebook in 2009. Why would you post photos of diapering and potty training when your child is 11+.

 

These parents are sounding really weird and not very innocent.

  • Like 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I came across the facebook page of my sister (I didn't go looking). She was using a picture of my son as her facebook profile picture. At that point we weren't on speaking terms, and I assume she got the picture from my dad. She had no relationship with my son either. I was really surprised and kinda ticked off. I felt like...get your own kid. I just let it go, but yeah I was baffled by it.

I had that happen. I came across a mentally unstable relative who had my children in her picture..not the profile one, but the one that goes across the top, I reported it to FB and FB removed it right away.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Posting those types of photos as your child is hitting the preteen/teen years sounds almost cruel.  Why would they think it was a good idea to post nude photos of their child potty training and other private things years after the fact, and hundreds of photos at that?  And then refuse to take them down when their child indicates she is horrifically embarrassed?  I cannot imagine doing that to my kids.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

How sad.

 

I have friends who think nothing of continually venting about their children/embarrassing them publicly on Facebook.  It makes me shudder.  One can only hope their relationship offline is better than it is portrayed.  I wouldn't dream of posting something I wouldn't say to my own children *about them*. I don't even use their names - when they go for a job, I don't want a search history bringing up something that would mortify them.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If a grown child demanded that their pictures be taken down would you do so--or would you stand your ground even if they threatened to sue?

 

(of course I can't imagine you would ever let such an adversarial relationship with a child develop, but perhaps imagine that the child has developed mental health issues that override whatever positive relationship you had in the past)

I would hazard a guess that I would simply because it would be such an unusual thing that I'd have to think they have good cause for it.

 

However, once you start to introduce mental health issues things get... well... crazy. And with some folks like that, no amount of reasoning changes it and it won't matter if they get exactly what they ask for, they'll just find something else to stir misery over. And I can understand why some people might decide to not permit that person to determine their decisions anymore.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Listen, if you get to the stage where your kid is willing to sue you, you're almost certainly bad parents.

No.

 

However, I agree that it sounds as if the parents have been horrible.  The first photo we ever posted online of one of our children was of a fifteen year old in a sporting event.  He begged us to do it.  

Years ago I tried to keep other people from posting pictures of the children online, but it has become a matter of course for camps, teams, and classes to do so.  I don't even know if it is possible to register for anything without checking the box authorizing use of the registrant's image.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, cave canem, I have to say I can't think of many parent/child lawsuits where the parents were  in the right and the kid in the wrong. Perhaps some exist, but I can't really imagine the scenario that shouts "Yup, good parents!"

 

In these sorts of cases, either the parents are in the wrong, or they screwed up raising their child so badly that their kid decided to sue them for pettiness. Either way, sounds like bad parenting to me. (Option three is some sort of mental health issue that couldn't be avoided, I suppose.)

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

However, once you start to introduce mental health issues things get... well... crazy. And with some folks like that, no amount of reasoning changes it and it won't matter if they get exactly what they ask for, they'll just find something else to stir misery over. And I can understand why some people might decide to not permit that person to determine their decisions anymore.

 

If what they're asking for in this situation is reasonable, then you ought to just do it. You can reject their unreasonable requests and still follow the reasonable ones.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If what they're asking for in this situation is reasonable, then you ought to just do it. You can reject their unreasonable requests and still follow the reasonable ones.

No. There is no reasonable with the crazy I know of. I reject letting them have any say whatsoever in any aspect of my life because for *that* person, doing so opens myself up to their diabolical manipulations and I refuse to allow that after a lifetime of experience. It *sounds* like I should be able to do what you suggest, because what you suggest is what reasonable *should* be able to manage, but I know it does not always work like that with crazy. Or the crazy I've known anyways. If you've had better luck with other crazy, then I'm sincerely happy for you.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

No. There is no reasonable with the crazy I know of. I reject letting them have any say whatsoever in any aspect of my life because for *that* person, doing so opens myself up to their diabolical manipulations and I refuse to allow that after a lifetime of experience. It *sounds* like I should be able to do what you suggest, because what you suggest is what reasonable *should* be able to manage, but I know it does not always work like that with crazy. Or the crazy I've known anyways. If you've had better luck with other crazy, then I'm sincerely happy for you.

 

it's actually sort of heartwarming there are people in the world who don't have to deal with crazies in their family/lives and have no idea what is involved.

 

you can't reason with crazy.  by *definition* they are UNreasonable.

 

difficult people can be reasoned with - but they aren't not in the same league as "crazies".

 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It doesn't matter whether they're crazy or not, they have a right not to have you posting their images - especially their naked images! - all over the internet. You have no right to post that stuff without their permission. And that's what we're discussing - a situation where the parents are utterly unreasonable, and now they're being taken to court.

  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wanna know how they define public. Are the pictures viewable to only the friends list or is the facebook page set to public? Could they compromise and have her photos only circulated around non strangers? If that still made her uncomfortable, though, I think they should respect her wishes and take them down in either case.

 

Anyone can take your photo and share it. I blocked someone from viewing my profile, but a mutual friend shared my photo and the blocked person was able to see it and comment. If the photo is on the internet, it is not private, no matter the settings.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

Ă—
Ă—
  • Create New...