Argh! I Feel Like Expelling My 5th Grader...

[JumpyTheFrog]

I am starting to lose the willpower to drag my intense ten year old through another school year. 

[mommyoffive]

UGH.

 

I have those days too.  

[Elizabeth 2]

Right there with you.  Curriculum came in today and I am seriously considering returning it.

[prairiewindmomma]

Preach it, sister.  :grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

[SparklyUnicorn]

sing it...

 

 

[JumpyTheFrog]

15 days done...too many to go for the new year.

[Guest]

My son is now 21.  I am going through the boxes of *everything* which is what I kept.  And i just ran across an old WTM thread about Ten.  It was on the old boards and probably inaccessible, and it is actually compiled of a bunch of threads related to ten year olds.  I gave it a very quick scan, and Put It Down Somewhere (and now I can't find it), but a couple things stood out to me.  A lot of moms who were past the ten-year-old stage, which they admitted had been intense, said that they wish in retrospect that they had realized that age ten is a point at which their sons in particular were just in over their heads.  They were much less mature than the girls, but having a lot of expectations put on them.  The moms said they had also chosen that time to sort of start putting on the pressure, which just resulted in a bad situation all around.  They said this was a time to listen, with your ears, with your heart, to listen "between the lines," and to do a lot of very short (like car-trip-to-the-grocery-store-short) conversations that introduced a lot of language they could use to describe their feelings, to put names to things they are experiencing that they don't have the vocabulary for.  There is a LOT going on for a 10yo, but they lack the language and so they are barely able to keep their heads above water, let alone take on pressure to GROW UP.  HELP them grow up, especially emotionally.

 

Dang it.  I have actually looked for that stack of printouts for a long time, and now I had hands on them, and POOF, they are gone again.  Anyway, that might help, an old gift from the Old Bees at the Old Hive.

 

[JumpyTheFrog]

I wish I could blame it on being ten, but my child has been like this for years. I have been dragging him through school since the second half of first grade. He is bright and academically advanced, but emotionally immature in many ways. It makes it hard to find work that is challenging enough for his brain without overloading his low-frustration tolerance.

Edited August 2, 2016 by HoppyTheToad

[fairfarmhand]

I get it.

 

The only thing that I have to offer is that drama needs an audience.

 

So hysterics get you a trip to your room.

[Sneezyone]

Mine is going to school for at least 8 months. We need the break. She'll be home, probably, April-August. I'm hopeful some exposure to the middle school experience (read busy work load) will help her appreciate just how good she's had it these last two years. DS, bless his heart, knows a good deal when he sees it.

[Lang Syne Boardie]

See the WTM logic board, search for stuff like "10 year old boys" and "my 11yo" and absolutely anything by poster farrarwilliams.

 

This is a stage. It's a pull-them-closer stage, if you can muster it -- the more they repel you, the harder you love them, and it will pass! It's a gift to them to let them get through this stage at home, if everyone can be happy enough to make that work.

[Guest]

I wish I could blame it on being ten, but my child has been like this for years. I have been dragging him through school since the second half of first grade. He is bright and academically advanced, but emotionally immature in many ways. It makes it hard to find work that is challenging enough for his brain without overloading his low-frustration tolerance.

 

Tell.  Me.  About.  It.  

 

Twin sons, different mothers.  Still, I was not entirely thoughtful in my approach, either...I was a lot of "my way or the highway to hell unleashed upon you" and I bitterly regret it.  

 

I don't know what the answer is, though.  I don't know that I could withstand a "do-over" because I do know how tough this kind of kid is...but I wish I could do over some bits of it.  In small doses.  :0)  

 

Talk to the hand.  

 

ETA     And I believe I should have enrolled my son in school at grade 8.  He agrees.  We did too much damage that has been slow to repair in those years.  He needed to be around others who are smart and who would push him, and get dang well used to it.  That's what HE says.   He's getting it now, at age 21 and it is really hard.  

[Katy]

I think 10 is the worst year for boys and 12 is the worst year for girls.

[fraidycat]

I lost mine. Willpower, that is. With my soon to be 14 year old. My brilliant, wonderful, sweet, kind, thoughtful, helpful, hardworking, creative child is rarely any of the above *for me* when it comes to schoolwork. For others... good as gold. So, for the sake of this child's education, our relationship, and my sanity - I will not be homeschooling high school. I truly believe that any attempt would cause irreparable damage to our relationship, and put her behind academically because it's such a battle to get anything into or out of her, educationally.

[2ndGenHomeschooler]

I think 10 is the worst year for boys and 12 is the worst year for girls.

I hope this is the case. My 12 year old DD is driving me crazy! If this is as bad as it gets maybe we'll make it. 😛

[Arcadia]

:grouphug: my DS11 is still as intense as ever.

[frugalmamatx]

I think 10 is the worst year for boys and 12 is the worst year for girls.

 

O lord - you mean my dd is going to get WORSE??????!?!?!?! She's turning 10 next month and already a huge handful.