Wedding guest clothing question (male)

[Luckymama]

Dh and I are attending a wedding Saturday in Louisville (gorgeous church downtown, reception at U of Louisville). 4:30 in the afternoon.

 

Dh is afraid of being overdressed. For a church wedding at that time of the day here, he'd wear a suit w bowtie. Earlier in the day he'd wear a navy jacket with khaki slacks...and the bowtie lol

 

Do you think the suit is ok?

[xixstar]

Suit always seems appropriate for a wedding in my book. My spouse would wear nothing less.

Edited July 14, 2016 by xixstar

[TechWife]

Yes, the suit is appropriate. IMO, khaki slacks are too informal for a church wedding at any time of the day. 

 

ETA: Two quotes come to mind, they are not original to me, but I don't know who to attribute them to: 

 

1) You can never be overdressed or overeducated. - possibly Oscar Wilde

 

2) In case of doubt, overdress - no idea who said this

 

 

Edited July 14, 2016 by TechWife

[Anacharsis]

Depends on the couple getting married. General rule of thumb is to never be dressed more formally than the bride and groom. :)

Edited July 14, 2016 by Anacharsis

[Emmalm]

Does it say on the invitation what the attire is supposed to be? My parents are going to a wedding in Maine where the attire is supposed to be "festive-casual." Figure that one out!

Having spent a little time in the south I would say that the suit might be a bit much (I may be wrong as I was not in Kentucky). But if the invitation doesn't specifically say what the attire is, a man in a suit with a bow tie (silly auto-correct won't let me make that one word!) is always classy! There is always the option to lose the tie and just wear the suit...less formal but still formal enough...

Edited July 14, 2016 by Emmalm

[Rebel Yell]

Depends on the couple getting married. General rule of thumb is to never be dressed more formally than the bride and groom. :)

Agreed. Any way to find out if the wedding party will be more casual? I've see a LOT of khaki pants, rolled-up sleeves, no ties for groomsmen.

 

But I think either is OK.

[Luckymama]

Thanks all :) There's nothing on the invitation. I have no idea how our friends, the bride and groom, will be dressed. They are in their 30s and not very casual people, if you know what I mean. They are actually married already, in a civil ceremony to appease her parents (they are from China). The church wedding is for his parents ;)

 

I think the suit will be fine.

Edited July 14, 2016 by Luckymama

[Xahm]

If he feels overdressed upon arrival, he can ditch the jacket and/or the tie pretty easily.

[zoobie]

Suit is appropriate. He can always take off the jacket and roll up sleeves at the reception.

[FaithManor]

I recently found out that honorary daughter's wedding is black tie, shirt, and black pants for the groomsmen. No coat, no vests. Good to know. Otherwise dh would have been in his black suit.

 

It is weird. The guys are going casual, but the gals are in evening gowns. The father of the bride will not wear a suit, but the mother of the bride has a floor length gown. I am decorating the reception which is very, very elegant. So it seems like an odd mix. Guests are being told nothing. Since it is at a golf course, though not outdoors, and 4:00 p.m., my guess is that a lot of people will go casual and then do a double take when they walk into a wedding that looks like a black tie event.

 

Oh well.

 

I'd go suit pants, button down, and regular tie, but toss the coat in the car just in case. That way he is covered both ways. I probably wouldn't do a bow tie for an afternoon wedding.

[justasque]

I would ask, especially since it's out of town, so you won't know what the local friends will be doing.  Nowadays, it varies so much!  

Edited July 14, 2016 by justasque

[ChocolateReignRemix]

If he feels overdressed upon arrival, he can ditch the jacket and/or the tie pretty easily.

 

+1

[gardenmom5]

does the reception go into the evening?

I think he'll be fine.  he can always take off his jacket and tie.

[goldberry]

Yes on the suit.  A man always looks nice in a suit. 

[JennyD]

Definitely the suit.  

 

In general, I follow my very stylish aunt's rule, which is that you can never go wrong by looking smart.  She lives in a place where nearly everyone but her wears very casual clothes to practically everything, yet somehow she inevitably manages to make everyone else in the room look underdressed.

 

 

[Danestress]

Many men wear suits daily. I can't imagine how it could be too dressy to wear a basic conservative men's suit to a church wedding. Men can be seen wearing suits all over in a regular work week. Why wouldn't they wear one to a church wedding? I am not saying they absolutely have to, but if unsure, it doesn't seem like if could possibly be a mistake.

[LucyStoner]

It's 2016. Bow ties are trendy pretty much anytime of day. Hell, I see people wear them with jeans. I think it is fine for him to wear a bow tie daytime or evening.

 

I agree. Men are lucky, they can ditch the jacket. We can't generally turn a formal gown into a more casual dress, lol.

[Luckymama]

He packed a suit, a pink Oxford, and a white w black polka-dotted bow tie. I will be wearing a sleeveless (dude, rocking the arms with powerlifting!) princess-seamed floral-printed (white background, shades of pink and fuschia) dress and nude heels.

 

Thanks!

 

So excited to see our friends :party: (Let's ignore the 10 hours we have to drive tomorrow :lol:)

[purplejackmama]

You can NEVER be too overdressed for a wedding in Louisville. ;)

[happi duck]

Bowties are cool!

[Rachel]

He packed a suit, a pink Oxford, and a white w black polka-dotted bow tie. I will be wearing a sleeveless (dude, rocking the arms with powerlifting!) princess-seamed floral-printed (white background, shades of pink and fuschia) dress and nude heels.

 

Thanks!

 

So excited to see our friends :party: (Let's ignore the 10 hours we have to drive tomorrow :lol:)

You will be dressed perfectly for a Louisville wedding."

[MEmama]

Does it say on the invitation what the attire is supposed to be? My parents are going to a wedding in Maine where the attire is supposed to be "festive-casual." Figure that one out!

Having spent a little time in the south I would say that the suit might be a bit much (I may be wrong as I was not in Kentucky). But if the invitation doesn't specifically say what the attire is, a man in a suit with a bow tie (silly auto-correct won't let me make that one word!) is always classy! There is always the option to lose the tie and just wear the suit...less formal but still formal enough...

Hmm, festive casual...assuming it's summertime, a flirty dress along the lines of LL Bean Signature line with wedges and a cardigan for her, khakis and light short sleeved button down (possibly with a bow tie to be fun) and practical shoes for him. Basically, look like you care but don't be fancy. There's not a whole lot of fancy here in Maine. :)

[Ellie]

Thanks all :) There's nothing on the invitation. I have no idea how our friends, the bride and groom, will be dressed. They are in their 30s and not very casual people, if you know what I mean. They are actually married already, in a civil ceremony to appease her parents (they are from China). The church wedding is for his parents ;)

 

I think the suit will be fine.

 

There shouldn't be any directions on the wedding invitation for what the guests should wear. Seriously.

 

If it's in a church, then a suit is perfect. If Mr. Luckymama is better-dressed than other men, it just shows his good taste. :-)

[MEmama]

There shouldn't be any directions on the wedding invitation for what the guests should wear. Seriously.

 

If it's in a church, then a suit is perfect. If Mr. Luckymama is better-dressed than other men, it just shows his good taste. :-)

Hmm. I disagree. After being overdressed on many occasions, I definitely think it's better to ask. The OPs outfits sound perfect for her situation.

 

But suits? Definitely regional and cultural. Here, in all but the very most formal weddings a suit would look out of place and impractical. Plus you might miss out on after service fun like jumping on the boat or taking an impromptu hike through the grounds. My (80 yo) parents in California would think a suit to be ridiculous and clownish. My southern in laws would think you were trying to one-up them.

 

I'd ask, every time. :)

[TechWife]

There shouldn't be any directions on the wedding invitation for what the guests should wear. Seriously.

 

If it's in a church, then a suit is perfect. If Mr. Luckymama is better-dressed than other men, it just shows his good taste. :-)

 

I agree - never put requirements on your guests. You are inviting them to celebrate with you, not to a fashion show. 

 

Hmm. I disagree. After being overdressed on many occasions, I definitely think it's better to ask. The OPs outfits sound perfect for her situation.

 

 

 

 

A gracious host or hostess would say "Wear whatever makes you comfortable." 

[MEmama]

I agree - never put requirements on your guests. You are inviting them to celebrate with you, not to a fashion show.

 

 

 

A gracious host or hostess would say "Wear whatever makes you comfortable."

I guess to me letting your guests know the general tone of the affair isn't setting a requirement, and just saying eh, wear whatever you want isn't gracious. Saying instead, when asked, "Tom and Linda are wearing X and Y", or "well, you know us! It'll be casual! That blue dress of yours is always lovely" is far more helpful. Because, clearly, we all have vastly different expectations and ideas of appropriateness. Why leave guests guessing and then ultimately uncomfortable?

 

Eta: maybe I'm sensitive to ambiguity because I've guessed wrong a few times and felt really out of place. Lucky you if you've not been in that situation! :)

Edited July 15, 2016 by MEmama

[KungFuPanda]

I think a tuxedo could leave you overdressed at a wedding, but never a regular suit. A few other guests may show up in khakis, but that doesn't make the suit inappropriate.

[KungFuPanda]

Hmm. I disagree. After being overdressed on many occasions, I definitely think it's better to ask. The OPs outfits sound perfect for her situation.

 

But suits? Definitely regional and cultural. Here, in all but the very most formal weddings a suit would look out of place and impractical. Plus you might miss out on after service fun like jumping on the boat or taking an impromptu hike through the grounds. My (80 yo) parents in California would think a suit to be ridiculous and clownish. My southern in laws would think you were trying to one-up them.

 

I'd ask, every time. :)

People work all day in suits. Some kids wear uniforms their entire school career. They don't have to be uncomfortable. I'm not sure how wearing one would keep you off a boat or from taking a walk. It might leave you out of a water balloon fight, but that could be considered a bonus. Edited July 15, 2016 by KungFuPanda

[Ellie]

I will assume that people know how to dress properly. I know this is no longer true, but I will assume it for manners' sake. People should have enough sense to know to dress up (e.g., suits for men, dresses/nice pants for women). An evening church wedding would be most formal. If people do not know how to dress properly, I will not officially notice, as I am neither the clothing police nor people's mother. :-)