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A vacation for mom---


Shellydon
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What would be a true vacation for you?  We are completing a 'vacation' and I am totally exhausted.  I have to clean the cabin we stayed in from top to bottom and then drive 6 hours.  I am realizing that as a mom, I don't ever get to actually get a break from my life like everyone else in my family. 

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Cruises. We don't get to go often, but when we do I don't have to do any work other than packing. We don't take the kids though. I'm sure it would be more work with them, but still probably not bad. All the food is prepared for you, all the cleaning is done for you, all you have to do is lay by the pool and maybe go on some shore excursions.

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I'm answering this sitting in a Starbucks parking lot, listening to non kid music, drinking my coffee, hoping the baby in the backseat doesn't wake up in the next five minutes. I think this is as close to a vacation as I'm going to get for a very long time.

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somewhere I want to go with maid service.  while we usually stay somewhere with a kitchen to make our own dinner (I will use convenience foods that I wouldn't normally use), I prefer hotels with a buffet breakfast.

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Any vacation in nature is a vacation for me as well as the family.

 

When camping, I get an extra vacation because in our family, all camping chores are male duties - from setting up (and keeping clean) the tent to cooking and cleaning utensils.

 

In general, in my family, the guys know I tend to do most things at home, so they get to "play" with it all when we're away.

 

You need to change the set up with your trips IMO.  ;)

 

When we vacation, I want new sights, walks/hikes, and no to low crowds.  Nature is a must.  We're not city fans.  We might take trips to cities to see museums or whatever, but it's never as relaxing to any of us as a vacation in nature whether in a tent or hotel on the beach.

 

I don't know that I'd care for a cruise to be honest.  I've never been one to want to sit and do nothing - by the pool or beach.  I like the outdoors and pleasant activity.  My mom loves cruises because she can gamble and eat with nothing else needed.  That's really not me at all.

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Every year I go to a dance conference with my students. A LOT of my students are my homeschooling mom friends. We go for FIVE days. We take workshops (or not), see shows, go to dinner or cook, we perform in the show, and we get our group photos taken all dolled up for the stage. We all stay in a condo in the same building as the event. It's gloriously selfish and restorative. With five moms in a room, dishes never pile up and it never gets messy. We have a No Divas policy, so the self-centered diva-types never get invited to stay with us.

 

It's a true vacation for me. I LOVE spending vacation time with my family, but I'm never really off-duty when they're around. I can only relax completely when I'm at his event or my son is at camp. Those two things are enough to keep me happily humming along the rest of the year :-)

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I gave up camping and cabins because as much as I love my males, they don't get the concept that I need a break from the same old same old. I told dh that camping and cabinning is simply continuing to work very hard at my regular job just with a change of scenery. We went a lot when all of the children were little, and I am glad they had the experience of all of the time in nature, hiking, swimming, exploring. But I was many years into "vacation exhaustion" and pulled the plug a few years ago.

 

Last year we spent nine days traveling around South Dakota and Wyoming. We stayed in hotels that had microwaves and fridges with big, included breakfast. Occasionally we had a meal out. The only regular chore I did was halfway through, laundry at the hotel while they swam. We saw The Badlands, Black Hills, Mt. Rushmore, Devil's Tower, etc. It was glorious! I felt very relaxed, very rested when we returned. Nine days away from work is huge for dh so he had a lovely time, and we made wonderful memories with the boys.

 

So I am happy to start saving again for another vacation like that.

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I know what you mean, sometimes.  We normally stay at a rented cabin in the mountains.  It is fully furnished, complete with washer and dryer.   Here I am going to the store and doing laundry just like at home.  It was more stressful for me b/c dh is one who goes on vacation and doesn't stop.  We hike, we do this, go there and do that and dd and I like that and want to do those things too but not.everyday!  We'd also just like to sit on the porch swing and swing away listening to the birds chirp, waterfall in the background and gaze at the mountains all while talking, taking a nap, etc. Sometimes when we go on vacation I need to get home to relax.

 

Maybe it's about communicating more between all family members.  Prioritize the list.  Do's and don'ts, preferences and everyone has a share/say as to what the plan looks like.  Also, what is the expectation or goal?  DH believes in doing.  DD and I believe that too but mixed in with "doing" NOTHING! LOL!

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I send my family away and stay home. The longest was 5 days, but I frequently do it for several hours. I spend the time either relaxing or getting stuff done but the vacation for me is knowing that my kids are well taken care of and I don't have to be there for them. I might miss them after 5 minutes but they're exhausting and taking these breaks makes me a better mom.

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That is why I put the nix on suggestions of renting cabins in the mountains. I have no desire to cook/clean on vacation.

Full service hotel/motel thank you very much. I am not cleaning or cooking on vacation. I am tired of food. (Really, I am trying to meal plan as well as get the lessons ready for when we start in a couple weeks, and I have no idea what to cook!)

I prefer some museums/attractions to see. I am not the type to sit around on a vacation (like in a cabin staring at the mountains or a condo on the beach). I am not into hiking either. I would love to go to SF or Washington DC (didn't work out a couple months ago).

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What would be a true vacation for you?  We are completing a 'vacation' and I am totally exhausted.  I have to clean the cabin we stayed in from top to bottom and then drive 6 hours.  I am realizing that as a mom, I don't ever get to actually get a break from my life like everyone else in my family. 

 

You have to clean the cabin? Are you borrowing it from someone? That'd be the only way I'd be okay with cleaning it from top to bottom. I don't mind throwing the last of the dishes in the dishwasher & running it, throwing a load of towels in the wash, etc before I go but actually cleaning when I paid to rent it? No.

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You have to clean the cabin? Are you borrowing it from someone? That'd be the only way I'd be okay with cleaning it from top to bottom. I don't mind throwing the last of the dishes in the dishwasher & running it, throwing a load of towels in the wash, etc before I go but actually cleaning when I paid to rent it? No.

 

We rented a cabin and part of the deal was it had to be left how we got it.  They inspected it upon letting us in and when we were about to leave.  There was no kitchen in it.  It's basically just somewhere to sleep.  It didn't require much cleaning, but them cleaning it was not part of the deal.

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We divide the work load. When we had small children, we did not stay in places we had to clean before leaving...other than a tent plus packing out trash. We stayed in places that had daily maid service, or a vrbo where there was a service that came in an cleaned between tenants ..our duty to throw trash in dumpster, run the vacuum, but not clean bathrooms and mop floors.

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We rented a cabin and part of the deal was it had to be left how we got it.  They inspected it upon letting us in and when we were about to leave.  There was no kitchen in it.  It's basically just somewhere to sleep.  It didn't require much cleaning, but them cleaning it was not part of the deal.

 

Are we talking dusting, washing floors and bathrooms or just straightening up?

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There's a bit of "stage of life" to this, so it's changed over time; but when the kids were young, I was all about doing ANYTHING where I didn't have to cook or shop for food or even deal with thinking through the TIMING of meals and corralling people to them-- we did AMC family camps and other nature camps or those ramshackle New England lodges where meals were on a set schedule in a central location -- I didn't care, I'd go anywhere, do anything (or nothing) lol, so long as I didn't have to deal with food.  Back then food, specifically, was what I needed to "break" from.  Back then the idea that a cabin in the woods would be "relaxing" for me would be  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly: .

 

It does get better.

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I've never been on a vacation in my adult life that I felt like was a vacation in the sense of escaping most responsibilities. Before we go there's getting all the laundry done and packed, making pet arrangements and (hopefully) leaving the house in decent order. Then while you're gone there's still always some tidying up to do, making sure everyone is doing okay on clothes and things like that. When you get back home there's a mound of laundry to catch back up on.

 

I've always thought vacations/traveling were highly over rated. I see them as a change of scenery that requires quite a lot of work.

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I do not mind driving, in fact I enjoy a good road trip.  But what I want is to stay somewhere with either a decent coffee shop nearby or an all-inclusive resort with all meals provided.  Which hubby won't spring for.  I am so over trying to cook in a motel room or small kitchenette and shopping and cleaning up - hey, it is MY vacation, too!  And I do not want to get most meals out of a cooler, either - me for the air conditioned small local restaurant, a decent clean bathroom, and a chance to relax a bit. 

 

I'd would have loved, when the kids were still teens, to have been able to afford a solid week at a dude ranch with activities like hiking, horseback riding, etc. and all food buffet style three times a day. Ah!

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I think I have very low needs in this department

 

As long as I am out of my ordinary element, I don't mind cooking and cleaning on vacation.  It still feels like a break, and it's okay with me.  We just got back from 7 nights of tent camping.  In the rain.  Not the easiest, but it was fun, and at the end, I feel like we got away from real life.

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I think the reality is that some things simply need to be done, and you can't get away from it.  Someone has to tuck the kids in, and if that is part of your noram job, a vacation won't take the need for that away.  Domestic jobs are often similar.

 

So for someone who is the main caregiver, some thought has to go into making a vacation a break.

 

For the last few years we've gone to a sort of cabin-resort.  There isn't a maid service, so there is still cleaning, but not as much as at home, and mostly I still do it - we are expected to leave the cabin tidy with the dishes washed.  My husband tends to do a lot of the packing stuff, and will do things with the kids like taking them hiking and canoeing, and also they really tend to entertain themselves to a greater degree. (He'd also clean happily if I asked him, but we tend to fall into our customary roles.)

 

But the main thing is that breakfast and supper are in the main lodge, so there is no need to think about them, only simple lunches and snacks.  Even though I like to cook, that makes a huge difference to how much of a vacation it is for me.

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I get moments of vacation when we are on vacation. Since budget is a huge issue for us we don't do anything full service.

 

Last fall I took the 2 girls to Albuquerque and Amarillo TX for a week. That was fun and fairly relaxing but it was totally up to me to pack (including tons of meds), plan hotels, food, do all the driving there, help get 2 special needs teens through airport security several times, etc. Then one got a kidney tone attack on our way home.

 

This springi took the same girls to see their bio sister on St. Petersburg FL. Nice time but busy with their special needs plus sister has Aspergers and girls had never met so there was that level of stress, etc. Good time, only moments of relaxed ng on the beach between obsessing special neess teen girls.

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I think the reality is that some things simply need to be done, and you can't get away from it.  Someone has to tuck the kids in, and if that is part of your noram job, a vacation won't take the need for that away.  Domestic jobs are often similar.

 

So for someone who is the main caregiver, some thought has to go into making a vacation a break.

 

For the last few years we've gone to a sort of cabin-resort.  There isn't a maid service, so there is still cleaning, but not as much as at home, and mostly I still do it - we are expected to leave the cabin tidy with the dishes washed.  My husband tends to do a lot of the packing stuff, and will do things with the kids like taking them hiking and canoeing, and also they really tend to entertain themselves to a greater degree. (He'd also clean happily if I asked him, but we tend to fall into our customary roles.)

 

But the main thing is that breakfast and supper are in the main lodge, so there is no need to think about them, only simple lunches and snacks.  Even though I like to cook, that makes a huge difference to how much of a vacation it is for me.

 

 

The bolded is so key... while for me what drove me to distraction when the kids was little was food (so your two-meals-in-the-lodge was just the sort of thing I looked for...), for one of my dearest friends it was driving.  In those days she was so sick of the travel team chauffeur drills that for her, a "break" was to pull up somewhere (anywhere), park the car, and not.get.in.it.again for a week.

 

I also found, in those days, that my husband, who really is a decent sort  :lol: , didn't GET how totally, heartily, exhausted I was with dealing with food.  He didn't deal with it, so to him it was no big deal... so he truly didn't understand why I pretty much insisted on meal service.  I had first to really focus on what was wearing on ME, and thereafter to be rather firm.

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There's a bit of "stage of life" to this, so it's changed over time; but when the kids were young, I was all about doing ANYTHING where I didn't have to cook or shop for food or even deal with thinking through the TIMING of meals and corralling people to them-- we did AMC family camps and other nature camps or those ramshackle New England lodges where meals were on a set schedule in a central location -- I didn't care, I'd go anywhere, do anything (or nothing) lol, so long as I didn't have to deal with food.  Back then food, specifically, was what I needed to "break" from.  Back then the idea that a cabin in the woods would be "relaxing" for me would be  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly: .

 

It does get better.

 

I would love to do a camp like that...but the stress of feeding my allergy kiddos in that environment would put me over the edge.

 

Instead, when we recently went camping, I just announced I wasn't cooking.  We were there for five days and the boys (the little three and the big one) simply had to fend for themselves at meal times.  I had packed the cooler with hard boiled eggs, pre-cooked chicken, lunch meat, etc.  There were fruits and veggies and rice cakes and cereal.  There was plenty of food, but none of it required cooking.

 

Wendy

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I was going to link this!  This is exactly how I've felt on "vacation" at times.

 

I would love to stay in a cabin or a vacation home sometime, but it would have to include cleaning - I mean, I don't want to have to clean.  Most places I've looked at have such a huge cleaning fee we just can't do it.  So it's hotels or motels for us.  I've been on a cruise and didn't like it much, but that aspect of it was so so nice. 

 

Otherwise, a good vacation for me includes being outdoors hiking or just walking around a nice arboretum or something like that.  Time to read. A little museum action, some nice restaurants, stops in comfortable coffee shops, walking around nice city areas, stopping at a pub with my husband, listening to local music...  I wouldn't mind a vacation where I had to cook one meal a day, but that would be my limit. 

Edited by marbel
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I'm answering this sitting in a Starbucks parking lot, listening to non kid music, drinking my coffee, hoping the baby in the backseat doesn't wake up in the next five minutes. I think this is as close to a vacation as I'm going to get for a very long time.

 

:iagree:  I try to convince myself that I'm privileged with so many "mini-vacations" throughout the year!

 

I worked until just a few years ago, and my job required me to stay in hotels for several nights each month. I really, really, REALLY miss that. Frankly, so do my kids. Apparently absence made ALL of our hearts grow, and stay, fonder! We're still trying to figure out how to balance this whole being around each other 24/7/352 thing.

 

For now I ship them all off for one week during summer and one week during winter. Then I stay home and binge on Netflix, eat stuff I don't want them eating, and on the last day I make it look like I spent all week deep cleaning or homeschool planning. This works because I can relax at home; I'm very skilled at ignoring the many things I "should" be doing instead. I know not everyone can LOL. Bless them.

 

Since retiring I've done a few one-on-one trip with my kids, which has been nice. Last summer I took my daughter to see Mt. Rushmore and the Ingalls homestead at her request (yawn!) and my son to an away MLB game across the country. My other son wants to go to a rodeo in Calgary later this week, so if I can find an open flight and reasonable hotel room at such late notice, we'll go. If not, he knows to plan ahead better for next year, and instead I'll take my daughter on her next request: the FBI museum in D.C.

 

We do just short 1-2 day trips. We fly, stay in hotels, and eat out so it's definitely a "vacation" for me even if I'm super uninterested in wherever they chose for us to go. I mostly go for the company. And to avoid housework and other stuff I'm tired of doing. But mostly it's the company. :tongue_smilie:

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We used to have a beach house and after awhile I stopped wanting to go as often as my dh did. He said, "Don't you want a break?" I shrugged my shoulders, and said, "Meh. Dishes here vs dishes there. Big deal." He was so surprised! But that was about the last time I had to do dishes at the beach house!

 

Maybe the jobs need to be divided up. My mom did all the cooking when we were young...and then she sat down. We 2 girls did the cleanup from there. Same on camping trips, and we each had set-up and tear-down responsibilities.

 

But for me, when my son was younger, the best "vacation" I got was whe the two guys took a road trip.

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In two days I leave for a conference in Nashville, which is an annual gathering/training time for people who work for pay for an interdenominational campus ministry organization, for which I am a very part time volunteer. As a volunteer, I don't need to go to the staff conferences, but I like to go when it works with my family's schedule. The other people at the conference will be viewing it as a work function, but for me it will be a vacation. I will not cook a single meal, I will not do any laundry, no children will crawl into my bed, and I will be able to have conversations with other adults which are not interrupted by a child every five minutes.

 

When we only had one child, DH and I felt like we got a true vacation every time we visited my parents. My mom would spend nearly the entire time playing with our son, and she would also cook all of the meals and even do laundry if we asked her to. One year I spent the day after Christmas at my parents' house in a chair reading a book. I only took breaks for meals. It was heavenly.  It is less of a vacation now, because inevitably the child who isn't playing with grandma wants our attention, and they can rarely agree on something to all play together.

 

I know this would not seem like a vacation for everyone, but I thought our trip to Disney last year was a good break from normal life. It was not relaxing, but there were no household duties and either we split up and each took a kid or we were experiencing a ride or some other attraction that both kids enjoyed, so there was almost no fighting.

 

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backpacking in the wilderness and being away from electronics, cars, people (other than my family),  chores, news, work.

 

ETA: I still do the cooking: boil water, pour into pouch with freeze dried food, seal, keep track of time. easy peasy.

There is no cleaning up, no straightening things, no decluttering - only minimal belongings are with us, and everything gets packed again.

Edited by regentrude
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Dh went away for work recently and we tagged along. Staying in an uncluttered serviced apartment with easy access to public transport and loads of educational experiences was awesome. cooking is quite enjoyable when it's a small part of what you do and because we weren't on a farm the kids clothes stayed clean so there was loads less laundry.

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There's a bit of "stage of life" to this, so it's changed over time; but when the kids were young, I was all about doing ANYTHING where I didn't have to cook or shop for food or even deal with thinking through the TIMING of meals and corralling people to them-- we did AMC family camps and other nature camps or those ramshackle New England lodges where meals were on a set schedule in a central location -- I didn't care, I'd go anywhere, do anything (or nothing) lol, so long as I didn't have to deal with food.  Back then food, specifically, was what I needed to "break" from.  Back then the idea that a cabin in the woods would be "relaxing" for me would be  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly:  :willy_nilly: .

 

It does get better.

 

This is why I considered going on week-long camp out with my Boy Scouts as a type of mom-vacation.  I don't have to shop, prepare, or clean up for meals.  The camp staff takes care of it all. Granted I have to sleep in a tent with bugs, not wash my hair properly, and deal 98 degree high heat (which I spend in the air conditioned Scoutmaster lounge), but to not have think about food seems worth it.  Plus, the boys pretty much take care of themselves after waking them up and ensuring quiet at night. So I crochet, read, and have adult conversations with other Scouters while I wait for next meal.

Edited by J&JMom
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I adore family vacations and find them relaxing, regardless of all the prep and unpacking necessary.

 

That said, I also really love to escape with my friends for a weekend and leave the rest of the family behind.  Simply not being needed by anyone is refreshing.

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I think I have very low needs in this department

 

As long as I am out of my ordinary element, I don't mind cooking and cleaning on vacation.  It still feels like a break, and it's okay with me.  We just got back from 7 nights of tent camping.  In the rain.  Not the easiest, but it was fun, and at the end, I feel like we got away from real life.

 

I think you and I would get along very well.

 

I love traveling.  There is no such thing as work when we're traveling.  It's all fun at that point.  Hubby and the boys are the same way.  On many of our lengthy travels hubby actually continues working - just remotely.  Still, there's something different about taking a work break and heading out for an hour or two of snorkeling or exploring rather than "same old, same old" at home.  Foods vary across our country and planet too.  Discovering those differences is fun.  Meeting new people is fun.  We've never been on a "bad" trip.  We have some interesting stories we can tell and laugh about, but we've never had a bad trip.

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We like to VRBO with kitchens, so we'll take a big cooler of food (crockpot meals freezer prepped, etc) and also plan a few meals out, but DH pitches in.with food help and tons of baby help there. He might do bedtime while I get a quiet sunset 1/2 hour at the beach, etc.

 

But the cleaning is taken care of. I realize that kind of vaca is a budget thing, too, and maybe you own the cabin so you clean it yourself, but ugh, get everyone else to pitch in. That would not be a fun way to finish.

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Honestly, that sort of thing doesn't really bother me or tire me out. We always do self-catering holidays, but we would opt for the sorts of convenience foods we'd never use at home - pasta and sauce in a bag, bottled curry sauce, pre-marinated meats and heat-and-eat foods. For the end-of-holiday clean I usually do some of it the day before we leave then have dh take the kids out on the last day so I can clean quickly, quietly and efficiently. Dh and I share cooking duty and he drives. I try to make sure any place we stay has a washer and dryer so I bring home clean folded clothes (sometimes I send dh and the kids to a laundromat while I clean), and I clean our house well before we leave. I really, really hate it when my work starts the moment I walk in our door after the holiday.

 

Apart from that, it's mostly the planning I find stressful so I try to research and plan before we go, not while we're actually on holiday (eg opening times, transport routes and traveling time).

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Any vacation in nature is a vacation for me as well as the family.

 

When camping, I get an extra vacation because in our family, all camping chores are male duties - from setting up (and keeping clean) the tent to cooking and cleaning utensils.

 

In general, in my family, the guys know I tend to do most things at home, so they get to "play" with it all when we're away.

 

You need to change the set up with your trips IMO. ;)

 

When we vacation, I want new sights, walks/hikes, and no to low crowds. Nature is a must. We're not city fans. We might take trips to cities to see museums or whatever, but it's never as relaxing to any of us as a vacation in nature whether in a tent or hotel on the beach.

 

I don't know that I'd care for a cruise to be honest. I've never been one to want to sit and do nothing - by the pool or beach. I like the outdoors and pleasant activity. My mom loves cruises because she can gamble and eat with nothing else needed. That's really not me at all.

 

This. I absolutely love love love camping. We camp in a camper though-I wouldn't feel the same way about tent camping. I have all the amenities of home, AC, bathroom, kitchen, comfy bed...we generally do easy food for breakfast and lunch-stuff the kids can grab on their own, and dh grills for dinner. The kids get up and are outside from about 8 am to 9 pm. I drag them in for a quick shower and everyone falls into bed tired and happy. Last time we went camping, I read a 1,000 page book in four days. I had that much time to sit in my hammock and read while the kids swam and dug in the sand. There is no schedule, no running around, no sitting in a car or waiting in lines or restaurants. This makes for happy kids, which makes for a happy mama. We take the bare minimum with us-several swim suits and a couple of changes of clothes, a few books and a bag of toiletries. There isn't much to keep track of or pick up or clean. I do sweep the camper a few times a day, but it takes less than five minutes. It's my favorite vacation so far.

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LOL funny you should ask.  I just dropped my kids off at a week-long scout camp.  The drive home, listening to music, not being expected by anyone to do anything - that was my vacation.  Alas, it was only 1.5 hours, but it was lovely.  :P  Now this coming week will be a vacation from the kids, but I will be doubling down on my "work work" and housework.  I enjoy housework, so if I actually get time to do that, it will feel like free time.

 

A week ago we were in Eastern Europe traveling from city to city, and I was doing "work" work when we weren't touring (or sometimes even when we were).  The vacation part of that was that most of my clients were off work, so my "urgent" workload was light.  And I didn't have to do much cleaning nor any food prep.  I also gave my kids (and myself) a break from school work.  And it was a change of scene.  :)  But the flying was brutal.  I'm still recovering.  :P

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I agree that a cruise is probably the easiest vacation with kids, if you can be laid back about what they are eating and doing.  For me, the excursions are enough to keep it from being boring.  I am not one to gamble or go to shows and such.  Between excursions, there is a "kids camp" to keep them entertained while I do my thing (work or get a massage or sip coffee on the balcony).

 

My least favorite is "family camp" where they have scheduled meals and everyone is supposed to show up on time and bus tables and such.  Having to leap out of bed at X:00 the morning to endure judgmental looks about who was supposed to set the table ... no thanks.  :P

Edited by SKL
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And I get very lax about food on trips.  You want pizza for the 10th time this week?  Sure!  Before we flew home on our last trip, I let everyone buy candy bars the night before, because we had to leave before the hotel breakfast was served.  Nobody died.

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We have done VRBO and condo stays with kitchens.  

 

While they are nice, you are still doing the shopping, lugging, cooking, and cleaning.

 

The last 2 vacations I have booked hotels with free breakfast and evening receptions that we used as dinner.  Btwn the 2 dh and I did now cooking, shopping, planning, or clean up.

 

Now that is a vacation to me.  Sure we had to do all the packing, flying, rental car (car seats), but I don't feel like vacations are really going to be relaxing for awhile.

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My best vacations are the ones where I go with my entire family, about 32 people. We get a huge house, this year it was in the Poconos. Each family is responsible for 1 meal and everyone helps clean up after the meals and during the last day straightening up. During the day we either plan things to do in a group together or just with your own family. The best part is that all the cousins play together day and night so the adults don't really have to parent too much. We just supervise which is really relaxing.

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We just went  on a family vacation.  I don't want to repeat that one.  It was mostly to see family who happen to live in a nice location.  Two days of traveling there, two days back, and four days in the location.  I didn't have to clean or cook, but I was still the family organizer in a new location.   It's exhausting.  We have a son in a wheelchair and a very intense daughter along with two other children who are easy to travel with.  I'd personally like to travel someplace close, stay in one place, and have all my meals and activities prepared for me.  Maybe a resort type place.  I am going to visit my mom by myself in a few weeks and that will be "my" vacation.  Then I can relax.

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