ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Please, JAWM. Pretty please. Trust me, if you disagree with me, trust me, plenty of other people do too and have expressed their opinions.  Anyway, since we aren't telling family for a while, I thought I'd check out some pregnancy forums/facebook boards. I even joined one just for over 40 moms. I figured I could chat about things there, since I can't in public/with family.  Yeah...that's not going to work out. Everyone acts like at 40 years old I'm a ticking time bomb with a uterus waiting to kill my baby if I go a day over 39 seeks. Never mind that statisically a mom at 40, who has already had kids, has a LOWER still birth risk than a first time mom under 35. Never mind that I said I fully intended to have testing, biophysical profiles, at the advice of care providers (starting at 39 weeks).  Or, there are those who want to lecture me for planning a VBAC. Or natural birth. Or because I'm not rushing to have multiple beta HCG tests done, or progesterone levels checked, or whatever other thing.  Mind you, I have nothing but respect for how other women choose to do their pregnancy care and birth. hell, I really don't CARE. Everyone needs to do what they are comfortable with, and that will vary based on a woman's circumstances, risk factors, personal wishes/fears/concerns/lifestyle/whatever.  But I've been called all sorts of things, and that was in the past freaking few days alone!!! I'm done. No more pregnancy forums for me I think.  Plus, everyone on there is like 23 years old with their first baby anyway, lol. Except for the 40 plus ones,and those are so stressful i can't do them.  Anyway...I guess you guys are stuck with me talking about it here, plus my local ICAN group.  Thanks, vent over. 4 Quote
BrittanyM Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I totally know what you mean. Those forums are so full of drama and lack of respect for others it makes me sick! I'm not in the same situation as you (28 and expecting my 5th, my 3rd was stillborn) but I completely agree with you. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. Talk about it here all you want! Â Â Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 1 Quote
mommyoffive Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Ugh  Sorry you are getting bashed.  I would think everyone would want the best for one another and be cheering each other on.   We are happy to hear what is going on. 1 Quote
MrsMommy Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Step away from the pregnancy forums! Â Seriously, they're just the worst. Â You're awesome...ignore the haters! 8 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Aw. I'm sorry. Maybe it's just that one that stinks? Maybe you can find another one that's a better fit? Â I can't commiserate about the >40 thing, but I had multiple VBACs successfully. I support your VBAC decision! Quote
vonfirmath Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 (edited) I was 38 with my last baby and my medical provider was SO encouraging. Something about that NOT being advanced maternal age these days. Especially since it was not my first baby. Â (And I am almost 43 and still sort of thinking about wanting another one. And I wouldn't be one whit concerned about being over 40 -- you know, except for the being tired all the time thing. I did feel I was more exhausted at almost-38 than I was at almost-34) Edited June 27, 2016 by vonfirmath Quote
eternalsummer Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 pregnancy forums are useless imo  they are full of people having their first or second baby (maybe because after that you don't really need as much support/advice?  i dunno)  my mom had a similar thing when she had my sister at 42, except obviously not with online forums - it was her doctors!  she felt really attacked constantly, and they pushed and pushed for an amnio she didn't want so she could have an abortion she didn't want when the baby turned out to have Down's (which it didn't).   probably more experience here with pregnancy, including older=lady pregnancy, than on any of those forums anyway. 5 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Ugh  Sorry you are getting bashed. I would think everyone would want the best for one another and be cheering each other on.  We are happy to hear what is going on. Yep! Come talk to us. We love babies. And women over 40!! :) Quote
AnnE-girl Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 That stinks. Does the no longer in print natural mothering magazine still have pregnancy forums? I can't remember if we're allowed to mention specific sites on here. Of course, they may be too far on the other side of the crunchy continuum. Quote
ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Author Posted June 27, 2016 awww. you guys are awesome!  And I am VERY lucky that my midwife had her last at 39, and had 5 kids, all natural, and is totally supportive. AND, she listens to me. I actually just talked to her and said, I know I'm super early but.... and she said, "So, what do you need from me, what can I do?" I asked for an early ultrasound to check for twins, hear heartbeat, etc and she said no problem, and we set it up for 7 weeks after discussing pros and cons of different times to do it. Love her.  This will be my 3rd VBAC if all goes well. 7 Quote
xixstar Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I miss the mothering forums. I tried the mainstream ones with this last babe and found it rather pointless. I missed have a supportive DDC to talk about whatever. Cause, yes, even for a 4th pregnancy, I wanted to chat and focus on it. Â Mothering is still there but the volume of participants was too low to feel like a support forum. I think there were 4 of us that we're semi-active. 1 Quote
TranquilMind Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Please, JAWM. Pretty please. Trust me, if you disagree with me, trust me, plenty of other people do too and have expressed their opinions.  Anyway, since we aren't telling family for a while, I thought I'd check out some pregnancy forums/facebook boards. I even joined one just for over 40 moms. I figured I could chat about things there, since I can't in public/with family.  Yeah...that's not going to work out. Everyone acts like at 40 years old I'm a ticking time bomb with a uterus waiting to kill my baby if I go a day over 39 seeks. Never mind that statisically a mom at 40, who has already had kids, has a LOWER still birth risk than a first time mom under 35. Never mind that I said I fully intended to have testing, biophysical profiles, at the advice of care providers (starting at 39 weeks).  Or, there are those who want to lecture me for planning a VBAC. Or natural birth. Or because I'm not rushing to have multiple beta HCG tests done, or progesterone levels checked, or whatever other thing.  Mind you, I have nothing but respect for how other women choose to do their pregnancy care and birth. hell, I really don't CARE. Everyone needs to do what they are comfortable with, and that will vary based on a woman's circumstances, risk factors, personal wishes/fears/concerns/lifestyle/whatever.  But I've been called all sorts of things, and that was in the past freaking few days alone!!! I'm done. No more pregnancy forums for me I think.  Plus, everyone on there is like 23 years old with their first baby anyway, lol. Except for the 40 plus ones,and those are so stressful i can't do them.  Anyway...I guess you guys are stuck with me talking about it here, plus my local ICAN group.  Thanks, vent over. Oh, I get it. I've seen lots of insane posts lately and I'm not even looking on pregnancy forums.  But I remember...  I had my first in my late 30's (and then more). You would have thought that I had one foot in the grave and should have had an ambulance standing by from the ridiculous advice coming from every direction. I had a room of people laugh in my face at one point at something I said I was going to do. Yeah, I had the last laugh on that one, BTW.  They can do what they want, and fret how they want.  You have a fantastic, easy, pain-free, perfect birth.  It can happen - even for the elderly. ;)   (I'm kidding!)   2 Quote
Bluegoat Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Please, JAWM. Pretty please. Trust me, if you disagree with me, trust me, plenty of other people do too and have expressed their opinions.  Anyway, since we aren't telling family for a while, I thought I'd check out some pregnancy forums/facebook boards. I even joined one just for over 40 moms. I figured I could chat about things there, since I can't in public/with family.  Yeah...that's not going to work out. Everyone acts like at 40 years old I'm a ticking time bomb with a uterus waiting to kill my baby if I go a day over 39 seeks. Never mind that statisically a mom at 40, who has already had kids, has a LOWER still birth risk than a first time mom under 35. Never mind that I said I fully intended to have testing, biophysical profiles, at the advice of care providers (starting at 39 weeks).  Or, there are those who want to lecture me for planning a VBAC. Or natural birth. Or because I'm not rushing to have multiple beta HCG tests done, or progesterone levels checked, or whatever other thing.  Mind you, I have nothing but respect for how other women choose to do their pregnancy care and birth. hell, I really don't CARE. Everyone needs to do what they are comfortable with, and that will vary based on a woman's circumstances, risk factors, personal wishes/fears/concerns/lifestyle/whatever.  But I've been called all sorts of things, and that was in the past freaking few days alone!!! I'm done. No more pregnancy forums for me I think.  Plus, everyone on there is like 23 years old with their first baby anyway, lol. Except for the 40 plus ones,and those are so stressful i can't do them.  Anyway...I guess you guys are stuck with me talking about it here, plus my local ICAN group.  Thanks, vent over.  I understand your pain. I'm due in October, by which time I'll be 40. My doctor is great, but the hoops for "geriatric mothers" - good lord deliver us. Most of it doesn't apply to me - I've had 3 sections so I'm not trying for a VBAC, but there is a real sense of hysteria.  What I find very frustrating is that it doesn't seem to occur to people that even if it is the case that going past 40 weeks increases the statistical chance of a problem, taking the baby out earlier will not necessarily be a solution. People's sense of cause and effect is a little wonky, IMO.  I've been on a moms of babies forum on FB for a while, I've just never "unjoined" but some of the young mom stuff - I guess I was that wound up too? I don't know, I feel like things have become more hysterical over the last 10 years. Quote
Bluegoat Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I uded to be on the Mothering forums - they were nice, but they did have their own brand of crazy. 1 Quote
gardenmom5 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 hugs.  I was an over 40 with a VBaC with an over 10lb baby . . . .  there have to be forums for multigravadas who are considered elderly (medically speaking.)  but, I tended to hear those first-time twenty-something moms and think "bless their hearts. aren't they so precious?" (in my best southern drawl of course.)   5 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I understand your pain. I'm due in October, by which time I'll be 40. My doctor is great, but the hoops for "geriatric mothers" - good lord deliver us. Most of it doesn't apply to me - I've had 3 sections so I'm not trying for a VBAC, but there is a real sense of hysteria. Â What I find very frustrating is that it doesn't seem to occur to people that even if it is the case that going past 40 weeks increases the statistical chance of a problem, taking the baby out earlier will not necessarily be a solution. People's sense of cause and effect is a little wonky, IMO. Â I've been on a moms of babies forum on FB for a while, I've just never "unjoined" but some of the young mom stuff - I guess I was that wound up too? I don't know, I feel like things have become more hysterical over the last 10 years. First congratulations Bluegoat! I had no idea! Â And yes, somewhere between my first and second babies things became hysterical indeed. Suddenly pregnancy became a formulaic list of absolutes- thou shalt not eat lunch meat, thou shall only sleep on thy left side, thou shall not have even a single glass of wine because of course there is no such thing as a pregnant woman with a sense of moderation- you're condemning you child to a life sentence of Fetal Alcohol Sydrome, Thou shalt not consume caffeine. Or sugar. Or anything that tastes good. You must not gain more than 25 lbs and if something is wrong with the baby it is your fault because you pumped gas or licked a plate made in China or something. I felt lucky to have an older OB who laughed over all of these mandates and suggested I not read any more pregnancy sites and stay away from paranoid pregnant women and doomsday books. It was wonderful advice. I stayed in my insulated little bubble. Â My favorite response to one of these were when a friend of mine who was pregnant at the same time I was, was having a SINGLE glass of wine at a wedding reception. She was about 7 months pregnant, so it was noticeable. A woman she did not know marched over to her and said "well I certainly hope that is non alcoholic!" My friend smiled and said "it most certainly is not. But don't worry, we will just buy her a helmet if it doesn't work out." The woman stormed off with steam coming out of her ears. The helmet joke has been a long running one now- the judgment of pregnant women boggles my mind. Along with the fact that people who open the door for you when you're pregnant as if you're an invalid have no trouble dropping the door in your face when you're towing two infants along with a diaper bag. Quote
Audrey Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 There are positive 40+ pregnancy forums out there where you can talk baby stuff with others like you. Try a different one.  http://achildafter40.com/a-child-after-40-online/  http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f326-pregnancy-over-35/1825216-40-and-pregnant-surprise.html (says they pride themselves on being the friendliest)  http://babyandbump.momtastic.com/pregnancy-over-35/  Google came up with more than this. These are just a few that looked pretty active. 5 Quote
Cinder Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 :grouphug:Â Â I was 39yo when pregnant with dd and was fortunate to encounter only lots of encouragement. My first ob (we moved states halfway through) didn't consider my age a major factor since his mom was my age when she'd had him. And he was probably 20 years older than me. My second ob was fairly conservative--didn't like "older" moms to go past 40 weeks, but she didn't insist that I be induced earlier than that. Both were perfectly fine with my forgoing the standard genetic testing. Â So sorry you're getting so much negativity. Some people just need to put a cork in it! :glare: Â :grouphug: Quote
ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Author Posted June 27, 2016 oh my , I feel so much better. You ladies are awesome! And to be fair, it's usually only a few really judgmental ones, but they can ruin a place, you know? 1 Quote
TrixieB Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 You've already had 2 VBACs? Â :thumbup1: :thumbup1: Â Those lecturing people need to shut up. 1 Quote
marbel Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug:  Boo on them!  What would they have done with me, I wonder? First time mom at 41. Pitchforks?! Quote
SproutMamaK Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Oh my gosh, pregnancy forums. The are the WORST, particularly the babycenter ones. (Are we allowed to name sites directly? Because I'm doing it anyway. :P ) Waaaaay back with my first, I was on a board there that imploded thanks to drama. I'm talking virtual stalking leading to real life harassment, CPS calls over... gosh I forget what, I think someone saying they were planning to have a glass of wine in labour (on the advice of their health care provider)? Something like that. And later more calls to CPS or EVERYTHING. A few people who turned out to not even be Moms who were posting just to cause trouble, a few people who made up financial or health issues to get aide from the group... I mean, it was seriously, seriously messed up. Our group (obviously) fractured over it. A small group of us that stayed out of trouble (for the most part) started up our own website/chat board, we has now morphed into a facebook group. Actually, a bunch of us ended up homeschooling and a few of us are here on this board, too! ( :seeya: *hey guys!* :seeya: ) Â There are literally people who go from board to board jsut to trash people and cause whatever problems they can for whomever they can, because it's fun for them, and the there are plenty of others who go along with the bandwagon because who doesn't love to feel superior? Â Stick with the forums & people you know are decent and leave the rest behind without a second thought. Ain't nobody got time for that! 1 Quote
mamiof5 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Your pregnancy and your baby will be just fine. The entire process is in God's hands, not the doctors, tests etc. I'm all for prenatal care, but tests etc are not perfect. Our last pregnancy we had to refuse a ton of ultrasounds...we did some, but not near the amount they wanted to do. Sorry people are giving you a hard time about it :( I'd love hearing about your pregnancy, the good and the bad (possible morning sickness, nausea, tiredness etc). Praying for a healthy pregnancy and baby! 1 Quote
mamiof5 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Oh my gosh, pregnancy forums. The are the WORST, particularly the babycenter ones. (Are we allowed to name sites directly? Because I'm doing it anyway. :P ) Waaaaay back with my first, I was on a board there that imploded thanks to drama. I'm talking virtual stalking leading to real life harassment, CPS calls over... gosh I forget what, I think someone saying they were planning to have a glass of wine in labour (on the advice of their health care provider)? Something like that. And later more calls to CPS or EVERYTHING. A few people who turned out to not even be Moms who were posting just to cause trouble, a few people who made up financial or health issues to get aide from the group... I mean, it was seriously, seriously messed up. Our group (obviously) fractured over it. A small group of us that stayed out of trouble (for the most part) started up our own website/chat board, we has now morphed into a facebook group. Actually, a bunch of us ended up homeschooling and a few of us are here on this board, too! ( :seeya: *hey guys!* :seeya: )  There are literally people who go from board to board jsut to trash people and cause whatever problems they can for whomever they can, because it's fun for them, and the there are plenty of others who go along with the bandwagon because who doesn't love to feel superior?  Stick with the forums & people you know are decent and leave the rest behind without a second thought. Ain't nobody got time for that! Couldn't like this (we need a dislike button). This is sad! I don't get it, who has the time to go around pestering others? And...why?? Ugh!! Ă°Å¸ËœÅ¾ 1 Quote
ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Author Posted June 27, 2016 Ok, I'm glad to hear it isn't just me! And I do get that a woman with her first baby after 10 years of fertility treatments may look at things different than someone who has multiple children and has been there, done that before. I do. But my stars! It's one thing to say "Oh, well, I chose to do this instead. Best of luck!" and another to say you are irresponsible, stupid, etc. Or imply you have no care for your baby, etc. Ugh.  yeah, I'll stay away. 1 Quote
ashfern Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I tried the pregnancy boards with my last pregnancy because it had been awhile since my 4th baby. Oh my, the drama! I did get some good info on cloth diapers and new baby products that weren't around the last time. I turned 42 a couple of weeks after baby was born so if you have any questions feel free to ask away. 1 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I spent years on pregnancy forums and finally ditched them entirely with my fourth kid. Some are nice, especially whe the group is targeted, but most stink. Quote
ashfern Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Â Our last pregnancy we had to refuse a ton of ultrasounds...we did some, but not near the amount they wanted to do. Sorry people are giving you a hard time about it :( Â My OB wanted me to see a high risk doc solely based on my age. I asked him if the diagnostic ultrasound that they do at 20 weeks is any different than what the specialist would do. He said no so we made a deal that if there was anything weird on that scan that I would then see the specialist. Everything was fine so we saved on the hassle, stress, and expense of having to see a different doc. 2 Quote
KungFuPanda Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Wait! I missed the pregnancy announcement! Congratulations! Â If you want to use the forums, just rejoin under a different name and knock ten years off your age. They don't need your details. 2 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 (edited) And for what it's worth my large family board has pregnancy threads that are awesome. We span ages but all of us are respectful, supportive, and generally very pleasant. Those gals rock, and it's super fun to be on a thread with someone for several different babies :D. Plus, our mamas with larger families who are having pregnancies in their forties can get some solidarity from others walking the same road, with the same ideological values, and it's just a lot more gentle than anything on pregnancy.org or babycenter! Â Find a group like that, or better yet, start a social group for pregnant mamas on here. I think you will get a much better match of ladies :) Edited June 27, 2016 by Arctic Mama Quote
theelfqueen Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Pregnancy forums are so full of crazy... RUN AWAY! Â Quote
Katy Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I've never had any luck with pregnancy forums either. They're all crazy. It's like the first exposure to pregnancy hormones induces a second puberty. Everybody is emotional, irrational, or just plain stupid. 1 Quote
Bluegoat Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I've never had any luck with pregnancy forums either. They're all crazy. It's like the first exposure to pregnancy hormones induces a second puberty. Everybody is emotional, irrational, or just plain stupid.  I've thought that about the hormones as well. Which is interesting, bevcause mama-instincs seem to be really encouraged as kind of over-riding other considerations on a lot of the forums I've seen. Grandmother advice, or even the father's desires or ideas, are given almost no room or credit or respect, if they go against mothering instincts. Which sounds ok until some of the mothering instincts seem crazy. Quote
pinkmint Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Oh my gosh, pregnancy forums. The are the WORST, particularly the babycenter ones. (Are we allowed to name sites directly? Because I'm doing it anyway. :p ) Waaaaay back with my first, I was on a board there that imploded thanks to drama. I'm talking virtual stalking leading to real life harassment, CPS calls over... gosh I forget what, I think someone saying they were planning to have a glass of wine in labour (on the advice of their health care provider)? Something like that. And later more calls to CPS or EVERYTHING. A few people who turned out to not even be Moms who were posting just to cause trouble, a few people who made up financial or health issues to get aide from the group... I mean, it was seriously, seriously messed up. Our group (obviously) fractured over it. A small group of us that stayed out of trouble (for the most part) started up our own website/chat board, we has now morphed into a facebook group. Actually, a bunch of us ended up homeschooling and a few of us are here on this board, too! ( :seeya: *hey guys!* :seeya: )  There are literally people who go from board to board jsut to trash people and cause whatever problems they can for whomever they can, because it's fun for them, and the there are plenty of others who go along with the bandwagon because who doesn't love to feel superior?  Stick with the forums & people you know are decent and leave the rest behind without a second thought. Ain't nobody got time for that!  Wow, this was my exact experience with a birth board there.  I didn't know if it was just my particular board that was bursting with hardcore drama. I've only been a part of one birth board but will never forget some of the stuff that happened there, fake stories and all. But the saddest part was when someon's drunken dh actually rolled onto a cosleeping newborn, and that was real :( Quote
Liz CA Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 You don't need a preg forum. You have done this before. I suggest you spend the time you are now NOT spending on the forum, sitting in a recliner eating smoothies and bon-bons. :lol: 2 Quote
nd293 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 I ended up in tears after some pregnancy forum nastiness - blocked a number of emails so people couldn't contact me directly and never, ever went back again. That was 10 years ago and I still don't engage much online - I post and move on, for the most part. It was a horrible experience. Â You should be able to find a group of older moms, or vbac moms or older vbac moms where you'll feel more welcome. Or not - I was on a 'specialised' group and it didn't really stop the nastiness! Quote
nd293 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Wow, this was my exact experience with a birth board there. Â Â My experience was on a board there too. Not drama, particularly, just nastiness. Quote
ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Author Posted June 27, 2016 (edited) I ended up in tears after some pregnancy forum nastiness - blocked a number of emails so people couldn't contact me directly and never, ever went back again. That was 10 years ago and I still don't engage much online - I post and move on, for the most part. It was a horrible experience.  You should be able to find a group of older moms, or vbac moms or older vbac moms where you'll feel more welcome. Or not - I was on a 'specialised' group and it didn't really stop the nastiness!  Yeah, the 40 plus moms are actually some of the worst. Which, for a lot of them, is probably partly because they've been doing all sorts of fertility treatments etc. Which not only exacerbates worries but heck, a lot of them on are some major hormonal medications!  But although the younger moms are focused on the tiny details or what not, while the older ones are more forthcoming in their attacks.  Oh, and don't get me started not the number of women purposely trying to get pregnant while in relationships they admit are bad, abusive, etc. It seems waiting to have a baby when you are in a stable place in your life is no longer a thing. (mind, you, I realize sometimes surprises happen, my first was a surprise, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about people who are bad mouthing their boyfriend who is cheating on them while still trying to get pregnant by him) Edited June 27, 2016 by ktgrok Quote
Audrey Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 And for what it's worth my large family board has pregnancy threads that are awesome. We span ages but all of us are respectful, supportive, and generally very pleasant. Those gals rock, and it's super fun to be on a thread with someone for several different babies :D. Plus, our mamas with larger families who are having pregnancies in their forties can get some solidarity from others walking the same road, with the same ideological values, and it's just a lot more gentle than anything on pregnancy.org or babycenter!  Find a group like that, or better yet, start a social group for pregnant mamas on here. I think you will get a much better match of ladies :)  A social group is a fantastic idea! That thread about "how old were you when you became a mom" showed that there are MANY ladies here who were having their first past 40 and many more who had subsequent ones into their 40's.  You can share to your hearts content and you can boot anyone who doesn't play nice. Plus, you'll never have to worry about accidentally upsetting anyone who might be having a painful struggle with fertility. 3 Quote
Guest Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Even just a social group for pregnant moms who aren't uptight, judgy twits is probably fine :lol: Quote
Desert Strawberry Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Ah yes. Stay away from all of that nonsense. Also, new mommy groups are equally ridiculous. After my 4th kid, 8 years into my parenting journey, I got tired of young mothers of 1 lecturing me on every minor detail of my parenting. After they compliment me on raising 3 awesome kids...???You are fine. Your baby will be fine. Everything will be ok.  post here instead.  Quote
Murphy101 Posted June 27, 2016 Posted June 27, 2016 Welcome to my world. Something about pregnancy forums magnifies x100 the worst of parenting forums. Â I rarely discuss pregnancy with anyone IRL or online. Â I think the most I've chatted in a pregnancy forum in years is I'm currently in one for pregnant moms sharing what we we are knitting for our babies. So far, I've knitted a few newborn hat & sweater costumes bc I didn't know the gender yet and costumes don't matter anyways. I made a pumpkin, Link from Zelda, and Jayne Cobb from Firefly. And I just finished a yellow dress with blue hearts. Unsure what is next. 5 Quote
ktgrok Posted June 27, 2016 Author Posted June 27, 2016 (edited) Ok, I did it! I started a new social group here, called Pregnancy Without Drama :lol:  http://forums.welltrainedmind.com/groups/266-pregnancy-without-drama/ SaveSave Edited June 27, 2016 by ktgrok 7 Quote
Ausmumof3 Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 Did I miss something? Congratulations. Yep I found the pregnancy forums turned nasty quickly. Wtm is so nice compared to many forums out there. 1 Quote
DesertBlossom Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 My grandmother had her last (10th) baby at 49. Totally healthy. Some people just enjoy stirring up drama and freaking people out. I prefer to believe that everything is going to be just fine unless something says otherwise. But being positive is always preferable. 1 Quote
Janie Grace Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 That's crazy. I can't imagine denigrating someone else's pregnancy for any reason, ever. What in the world??? Â I feel like moms have gotten more snarky. Even just on FB, there's so much angst about everything. I feel like when I was having babies, people were more chill. Or maybe I just didn't hang around snarky moms (IRL or online)! 2 Quote
ktgrok Posted June 28, 2016 Author Posted June 28, 2016 That's crazy. I can't imagine denigrating someone else's pregnancy for any reason, ever. What in the world???  I feel like moms have gotten more snarky. Even just on FB, there's so much angst about everything. I feel like when I was having babies, people were more chill. Or maybe I just didn't hang around snarky moms (IRL or online)!  Maybe they think on the internet manners don't matter? My in real life friends are great, so either I'm good at avoiding drama when it comes to friends, or people just get weird on the internet. Or a bit of both. I do HATE drama. Quote
Heather in OK Posted June 28, 2016 Posted June 28, 2016 People get C-RAZY when you start talking pregnancy and birth. Especially if it's something out of the "norm" (whatever that is..lol). I LOVE my seasoned mama clients!! And my VBAC clients!! :wub:  2 Quote
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