Going to public school next year... need to decide on 8th or 9th grade placement and classes

[Pen]

Please help me think this through.

 

My son is going to attend public school next year. He is 14 with a February birthdate, somewhat on the young side and small for his age.  He started Kindergarten with the group of kids who will be in 9th grade this next year. Then he went to a Waldorf school and did an extra year of kindergarten putting him officially in 7th grade at this time. 

 

He seems really young and really small compared to the rising 9th grade class, but he seems really old and advanced compared to what I've seen of the rising 8th grade class.  It is a very small rural school, btw, with exactly 12 kids in the current rising 8th grade class (he'd be the 13th and the 7th boy), and probably not many more than that in the rising 9th grade class (which is dominated by boys with maybe only 2 or 3 girls total).

 

I was thinking to have him be an 8th grader next year, giving some time to transition back to the public school grind, as well as maybe being some help to him in sports and other activities he wants to do, not to be as hard competition and not as grueling a schedule--and maybe giving him a chance to get some more maturity and seriousness about academics by the time he is into high school. However, he would like to be in 9th with his former Kindy classmates.

 

My son is bright, but also has dyslexia and dysgraphia issues, as well as being extremely shy at least currently. But he is also very social and probably more interested in the social, sports, and arts aspects of school than the academic aspects at this time. Despite his shyness, he was talking about being a class officer and how he'd like to do that at some point.

 

In Homeschool we have been able to have him work on all subjects where ever he is, but that may not work so well for a public school. Though ours has a lot more flexibility than some, especially because the location of the middle and senior high schools are together so that kids can go to classes at either quite easily.

 

 

 

 

 

Also, if he were placed in 8th, but allowed to take more advanced classes, which classes would make moving ahead the following year (that is skipping 9th and moving into his original class group in 10th) likely most feasible?

 

He will be in Algebra 1 next year in math. Everything else would probably be pretty easy with 8th grade placement and classes, other than just getting up early and doing the whole of what needs to be done for brick and mortar school, but probably pretty hard for him with a 9th grade placement or all or mostly all 9th grade classes.

 

A teacher he already knows due to current extracurriculars invited him to take a College Now (college credit in high school) class with that teacher, I think regardless of whether he is officially in 8th or 9th, so that would be at least one class at a good level of intellectual challenge and interest for him.

 

My own thought if all this would fit in a schedule, would be to register as an 8th grader and to take that one College Now class, Algebra 1, and maybe one  9th grade level class such as Language Arts, then science and social studies with the 8th graders, plus 2 arts type classes such as choir and visual arts, for his 7 classes-- giving him some challenge and some fun. And then to allow him to choose one sport per term at the public school, and to require him to continue his current music and his ice skating as extracurriculars.

 

 

 

 

[Ellie]

So, he was 14 last February? He should go into 9th grade in the fall. He'll be 15 in the middle of 9th. That would make him one of the oldest in his class.

[Arcadia]

If his ice skating is intense and time consuming, I would be tempted to choose 8th. If he would have enough time after school for ice skating, music and homework, then I would lean towards 9th because of his request to be with his old classmates since class size is small for 8th and 9th.

[J-rap]

Seeing as he wants to be in 9th to be with his former classmates, and seems capable enough, I think I'd put him in 9th.  You also said that he is quite bright, and I know now that my "quite bright" kids who I held back a year (because of summer birthdays) were really ready to graduate a year earlier.  My dd who I did advance a year because she was very bright and wanted to be with her former classmates, was so happy and did very well.  I think keeping holding her back would have made her kind of miserable.

 

One other option is to advance him from 8th to 10th grade if you want to wait one more year to decide.  That's actually how we did it with our dd.  She took 9th grade courses in 8th grade, and we ended up just advancing her to 10th grade after that.

 

 

[mamakelly]

If he was 14 in February, he should be in 9th. A 19 year old 12th grader would be a nightmare in the future. Put him in 9th.

[LisaKinVA]

Your son is essentially the same age as my rising 9th grade daughter (turning 15 at the end of January).  

 

It sounds like work-wise everything is on-target, and that he's developmentally ready for high school level work.  I'd only consider 8th grade at this point if he were not academically or developmentally prepared. I would have him re-evaluated regarding his LD's and request accommodations, if necessary.  My dd is also the 3rd smallest in her entire 8th grade class.  and the second smallest girl. There is one boy in her class that is smaller than she is.  Height/size isn't a reason to hold back.

[City Mouse]

My DS turned 14 this week and will be in 9th grade in August and he has some issues and a 504 plan in place.

 

You may need to check with the school. Where i live high school is done on credits not grade level like in elem or middle school. That means that the number of credits determines the student's status. If a student wanted to "skip" a high school year, that would mean having to complete all required credits in three years rather than 4 (or 4+ for those who take some HS credits in 8th grade). if your son takes 3 HS credits in 8th grade, then wants to graduate with the kids who stated HS a year earlier, he will have to find a way to take extra classes such as summer school to get all the credits he needs to graduate.

if he is in 8th grade in the fall, I would not plan on him graduating with the kids who start 9th grade this fall.

I agree that physical size does not seem like a good reason to keep him in 8th grade.

[Shellydon]

9th.  I can't imagine a 8th grader turning 15 in the middle of the year.  As a student, that would be awful.

[Renai]

I had held my dd back in 4th grade homeschool, and kept her at that level through 7th grade. She also has dyslexia and processing issues, was evaluated by the schools as eligible for an IEP. On the advice of some public school teachers, I was told she never would have been held back, but gone with her age-grade with appropriate accommodations. They said I could either move her up at the beginning of middle school (7th here) or the beginning of high school. She went to a charter school for the 7th. We opted to move her and she skipped the 8th grade, and attended another charter in the 9th.

 

It was the best decision for us. The age thing was already becoming an issue as she seemed 2 years older than some of her peers (she has an early fall birthday). 

 

It would be very hard to skip the first year of high school. He would probably need to take end of course exams in all the classes he missed to get credit for them. Here, as a homeschooler, they won't even allow the EOC exams to prove learning. If my daughter wanted to enter as a 10th grader, they would not allow it and would put her in 9th to take the classes.

 

I don't know many schools that would allow skipping the first year of high school. If he wants to graduate with his peers and on time, you would need to place him in  his age-grade now, the 9th.

[Tsuga]

Algebra 1 is 9th for typical kids. His age is 9th. Some boys are short longer. Still--9thz

[Mosaicmind]

I guess I don't give much concern to age as I do to maturity. I have a son who will turn 19 in March of his senior year, GASP!! Who cares?! So what if he's going to be 19 for 2 months before he graduates. I asked my son and he doesn't care because we were going to try and accelerate things so he graduated the year he turns 18 but he doesn't want to and I feel that he needs that extra year to mature a bit more before entering the Army, which is what he wants to do.

 

I have an older son that I held back one year after trying out ps and finding out it did more harm than good. He turned 19 the end of May in his senior year and graduated in June, again he didn't care either. He went into the Airforce and thanked me for that extra year.

 

I would take into consideration his wants, maturity, and if he will be able to do 9th grade work, which it sounds as if he can. You know your child the best so don't do things based on age, do what's right based on what you know your son is capable of and remember too that he won't be scarred if you chose to put him in 8th grade.

[momof4inco]

I would go with what your son wants to do. If you go against him at this age, he might be a very frustrated 19-year-old high school senior. 

 

I considered holding my second son back next year, doing a second year of 5th grade. After some great advice on these forums, I asked him what he really wanted. He finally admitted that he really wants to advance to 6th grade. I wish we had held him out of kindergarten one year longer (June birthday), but trying to fix that now would be detrimental to him.

[fourisenough]

Height shouldn't be a consideration at this point. I just attended commencement for my oldest DD. It was comical seeing a very short male administrator shaking hands with (and exchanging hugs with many) graduates who were anywhere from 1-3 heads taller than he. Adults, like high school students, come in all sizes.

 

I also agree that there is really no such thing as a grade skip in high school; a student either has the credits, or not. By age and academic readiness, I think your son sounds like a 9th grader. Best of luck to him as he transitions. I'd love a school as small as the one you describe.

[Alessandra]

I can't multi quote on phone, but I agree with no grade skip in high school. Most states and most schools have a list of courses required for graduation -- for example, four years of LA. And kids need a certain number of credits to graduate. Also, you would be limiting opportunities to take electives.

Edited June 11, 2016 by Alessandra

[...................]

Hmm....IMO you should let it be his call.  I remember being that age and while there were many areas in which I was totally clueless and even foolish, this is not something you would want him to chafe under.  He rememebrs the names of the kids and they'll remember him and it'll be way more awkward for him to be placed in a lower grade.  

 

Also, a lot of kids that are very old for their grade, really have a hard time senior year....being 19 in high school or even an older 18 can be very hard socially when you are just so ready to move on but you're stuck there.  (I was an October baby so had a lot of problems with this aspect of school, being so much older than most of my class....yes I had great grades but it really caused problems for me in junior and senior year.)

 

Hope this helps.

[luuknam]

If the public school is that small, I'm going to guess your options for dual enrollment or other advanced classes are probably quite limited without driving a long distance. So, I'd be inclined to put him in 9th grade this fall (I'd probably be inclined to do that regardless, but in a small town, definitely).

[katilac]

9th. 

 

It's what he wants, it's where he falls for both age and ability, and you don't skip grades in high school, you accumulate credits. That's why some students graduate in December or after summer courses. 

 

 

[EKS]

Another vote for 9th.

 

He is not young for his grade.  He is right in the middle.

[reign]

I would not want my child turning 15 in 8th grade if it could be helped. Especially if she didn't want too!!!

Edited June 11, 2016 by reign

[sassenach]

9th grade, for sure.

[Peaceful Isle]

He is older that my daughter and she is going into 9th next year.

 

Definately 9th grade.

[Pen]

Your son is essentially the same age as my rising 9th grade daughter (turning 15 at the end of January).  

 

It sounds like work-wise everything is on-target, and that he's developmentally ready for high school level work.  I'd only consider 8th grade at this point if he were not academically or developmentally prepared. I would have him re-evaluated regarding his LD's and request accommodations, if necessary.  My dd is also the 3rd smallest in her entire 8th grade class.  and the second smallest girl. There is one boy in her class that is smaller than she is.  Height/size isn't a reason to hold back.

 

 

By "on the young side" in my first paragraph, what I meant was that he is immature emotionally for his age.

 

 In a mixed age co-op group he mainly played with 12 year olds. He gets along great with his 9YO girl pairs skating partner (they are both into climbing trees, and tag games, for example).  He is afraid to speak up and ask questions, clarify dates when work is needed to be done, etc.--I took care of that in his co-op, contacting teachers because he had not paid attention, not brought home paperwork,  in the first place-- and was too "shy" (or whatever) to contact them to ask in the second place.  

 

He probably would not be able to maintain sports and also do 9th grade work at the same time. Maybe he could do one sport, but he wants to keep up skating and also do a sport at the public school and probably he cannot do that and maintain his grades high enough to maintain sports eligibility at the same time.  

 

To some degree I think this problem only exists because he was not redshirted in the first place. If he had been, he'd not be feeling like he should still be in the same class as so-and-so and so-and -so.  

[LisaKinVA]

By "on the young side" in my first paragraph, what I meant was that he is immature emotionally for his age.

 

 In a mixed age co-op group he mainly played with 12 year olds. He gets along great with his 9YO girl pairs skating partner (they are both into climbing trees, and tag games, for example).  He is afraid to speak up and ask questions, clarify dates when work is needed to be done, etc.--I took care of that in his co-op, contacting teachers because he had not paid attention, not brought home paperwork,  in the first place-- and was too "shy" (or whatever) to contact them to ask in the second place.  

 

He probably would not be able to maintain sports and also do 9th grade work at the same time. Maybe he could do one sport, but he wants to keep up skating and also do a sport at the public school and probably he cannot do that and maintain his grades high enough to maintain sports eligibility at the same time.  

 

To some degree I think this problem only exists because he was not redshirted in the first place. If he had been, he'd not be feeling like he should still be in the same class as so-and-so and so-and -so.  

 

That can make it hard.  My oldest (LEGOManiac) would have been "red shirted" in K (academically prepared, developmentally not ready).  But, I made the mistake of putting him in certain activities with kids according to what his grade would have been on the cut-off.  We experienced a little of what you're talking about, but moving overseas and changing the surroundings, plus ds's growing maturity have made him very happy where he is now.  

 

It's a gut-wrenching decision.  The difficult part being, if your son is not on-board, it will be a very tough road all around.  I'm all for parents being in charge/making the decisions, so please don't think I'm a complete pushover.  But, I would make every effort to help him clearly see the choices in front of him.  Ask him what his priorities are, why they are important, what this could do to his skating, etc.  It can be tremendously difficult to hold a kid back -- and this will be even more difficult if he is in complete disagreement with the decision.   Kids don't often see things as objectively as a parent might.  

 

The complicating factor about returning to public school, is that at that point, it becomes harder to step back.  If he was going to be homeschooled, I would say do next year as a test year for high school schedule/material across the board and make the final decision after the end of THAT year.  But, once in public high school back-tracking is going to be more like taking a 5th year.

 

I don't envy the spot you're in. :hug:

[Pen]

What I am now thinking toward, if schedules allow it and the school agrees and ds agrees, would be to enroll as 8th officially--which is where he is currently registered with the home schooling authority, and have him take 

 

Algebra 1

 

9th grade English

High school/college now level music history

 

8th grade social studies

8th grade science

 

and art and choir,

one at Middle school level  and one at high school level 

 

This would give him 3 classes at high school level, 3 classes at middle school level, plus Algebra 1 (which IMO is 8th grade level, but can be considered high school level).

 

It would also give him a chance to interact with kids from both 8th and 9th grade.

 

Then if he wanted to move ahead from 8th to 10th (skipping 9th) he is only missing 3 high school level credits, which seems possible to make up by taking a summer class, or a dual enrollment class that counts for more credit, or not having a study hall.  Or if he decides after all to stick with the 8th to 9th grade progression that would be fine. And either way would be less likely distress than finding that going into 9th is too hard/too much work/too much maturity needed/not enough time for sports and other activities.

 

 

[Mosaicmind]

What I am now thinking toward, if schedules allow it and the school agrees and ds agrees, would be to enroll as 8th officially--which is where he is currently registered with the home schooling authority, and have him take 

 

Algebra 1

 

9th grade English

High school/college now level music history

 

8th grade social studies

8th grade science

 

and art and choir,

one at Middle school level  and one at high school level 

 

This would give him 3 classes at high school level, 3 classes at middle school level, plus Algebra 1 (which IMO is 8th grade level, but can be considered high school level).

 

It would also give him a chance to interact with kids from both 8th and 9th grade.

 

Then if he wanted to move ahead from 8th to 10th (skipping 9th) he is only missing 3 high school level credits, which seems possible to make up by taking a summer class, or a dual enrollment class that counts for more credit, or not having a study hall.  Or if he decides after all to stick with the 8th to 9th grade progression that would be fine. And either way would be less likely distress than finding that going into 9th is too hard/too much work/too much maturity needed/not enough time for sports and other activities.

 

If you need to talk to another mother who has been there and done that then feel free to private message me. If your son needs a pen pal, then my son who is doing what you are considering would be more than happy to message him. I held our son back in 5th grade and when I did this I knew that he would be 19 the March of his senior year, but I also knew that this was the right thing to do. I held back our 3rd son in 5th grade also for different reasons and he turned 19 a week before he graduated from high school. He would tell you that it really didn't matter to him or his classmates.

 

My son that I'm homeschooling now turned 16 in March and he's just finished his 9th grade year. He enjoys hanging out with kids of all ages but he gets along best with kids a year or two younger than he is. He has been diagnosed with ADHD and struggles socially but you couldn't ask for a better kid to be a friends with and he has such a heart for kids who are hurting or those that don't make friends easily. He's smart though and can do 10th grade course work, but the social aspect and maturity are imo more of a factor when kids are in high school. My son wants to go into the Army to be a military police officer and being 19 when he graduates instead of 18 will be to his advantage.

 

In case you are curious, I asked his opinion about being older than kids his age and how he feels now that he's in high school. He told me that all the kids at youth group and on his soccer team know how old he is and what grade he is in but no one has ever commented on it. I've mentioned to church parents and soccer parents that he is actually 16 and not 15; all of them said they would have never guess because socially and maturity wise he's right on target for kids his age. I'm probably the only one here who thinks that you are making the right decision by keeping him in 8th instead of putting him in 9th. It was a gut-wrenching decision for me when I had to make it but once i had there was peace in knowing that I had made the right decision. It's hard and I'm praying for ya.

 

 

[luuknam]

I've mentioned to church parents and soccer parents that he is actually 16 and not 15; all of them said they would have never guess

 

I think that outside validation is good. When I was 14yo in 10th grade people usually thought I was 16, despite me being short (outside of school as well, where people didn't know my grade level). The OP has mentioned that her son seems young compared to the entering 9th graders, but old compared to the entering 8th graders though, so I'm not sure what to make of that.

[MinivanMom]

What I am now thinking toward, if schedules allow it and the school agrees and ds agrees, would be to enroll as 8th officially--which is where he is currently registered with the home schooling authority, and have him take 

 

*snip*

 

I have never heard of a school agreeing to what you are considering. Maybe it's possible to get an arrangement like this at your school since it sounds like a very small school, but I have a hard time imagining a school approving it. And I've never heard of a high school allowing a student to skip 9th grade regardless of high school credits earned in middle school. I think this is something you need to talk over with administrators at the school before making any plans.

 

Honestly, I would be a little more concerned with your son being somehow split between 8th and 9th grade than I would be with simply keeping him in 8th grade. If ds's concern is that he won't be with his former classmates and that they will know he's been held back, then taking some classes with the 9th graders, but not all classes, would seem to draw more attention to his situation and could potentially be more embarrassing. I really think you need to bite the bullet and make a decision one way or the other. Unfortunately, public school parents don't have the ability to hedge on grade level and make the decision later. They have to make the best decision they can with the information they have, and then they have to live with that decision.

 

I do think there's a difference between a parent making this decision on behalf of an elementary-age child versus a teenager at 14. It sounds like ds wants to go to high school, is academically prepared to go to high school, and is wanting to be in the same class with his friends. Maybe that means letting him go into 9th even though you have some doubts or maybe that means overriding him because you know he really would do better in 8th, but he definitely needs to be a part of the conversation.

 

I would spend some time talking with the school to figure out what options are and are not possible. And then I would spend some time talking with ds. You need a 14-yr-old to feel like he has a voice in the decision-making process, and you need him to be on board with whatever decision you wind up making.

[Pen]

I think that outside validation is good. When I was 14yo in 10th grade people usually thought I was 16, despite me being short (outside of school as well, where people didn't know my grade level). The OP has mentioned that her son seems young compared to the entering 9th graders, but old compared to the entering 8th graders though, so I'm not sure what to make of that.

 

The rising 9th grade class seems to have a bunch of kids who were possibly themselves redshirted into that grade thus actually a good bit older, or with summer and fall birthdays (back in kindy nearly all the class had had b'days before my ds had--it is not exactly the same group now, but if anything looks to have lost most (all?) of its younger smaller kids like my ds and gained some more bigger/older ones).  The kid we knew/know best who was both my ds's best friend in kindy, but also somewhat of a bully with rock throwing and other troubles has a an early fall b'day, for example. There are only 2 or 3 girls, one of whom is just a bit bigger than my ds, but as is often the case with girls, much more emotionally mature seeming. As compared to the majority of the rising 9th graders ds appears to be a little boy in the midst of already well-bearded (or 4 o-clock shadowed) young men football players and a mature looking big (6 foot?) second girl (possibly there is a 3rd girl, but not clear). The rising 9th grade actually seems older and huger than the rising 10th or 11th grade group.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

I have never heard of a school agreeing to what you are considering. Maybe it's possible to get an arrangement like this at your school since it sounds like a very small school, but I have a hard time imagining a school approving it. And I've never heard of a high school allowing a student to skip 9th grade regardless of high school credits earned in middle school. I think this is something you need to talk over with administrators at the school before making any plans.

 

Honestly, I would be a little more concerned with your son being somehow split between 8th and 9th grade than I would be with simply keeping him in 8th grade. If ds's concern is that he won't be with his former classmates and that they will know he's been held back, then taking some classes with the 9th graders, but not all classes, would seem to draw more attention to his situation and could potentially be more embarrassing. I really think you need to bite the bullet and make a decision one way or the other. Unfortunately, public school parents don't have the ability to hedge on grade level and make the decision later. They have to make the best decision they can with the information they have, and then they have to live with that decision.

 

I do think there's a difference between a parent making this decision on behalf of an elementary-age child versus a teenager at 14. It sounds like ds wants to go to high school, is academically prepared to go to high school, and is wanting to be in the same class with his friends. Maybe that means letting him go into 9th even though you have some doubts or maybe that means overriding him because you know he really would do better in 8th, but he definitely needs to be a part of the conversation.

 

I would spend some time talking with the school to figure out what options are and are not possible. And then I would spend some time talking with ds. You need a 14-yr-old to feel like he has a voice in the decision-making process, and you need him to be on board with whatever decision you wind up making.

 

 

I don't know if it would be allowed to go from 8th grade to 10th grade. Other possible alternatives might be to move up halfway during next year if he started in 8th and it was too easy for him, or to graduate early.

 

Taking 9th grade or other high school classes while in middle school *is* allowed. They already told me that without my even asking--they are quite pleased with that flexibility they have achieved. And ds was already invited to take the advanced music history and appreciation class by its teacher.  

 

It is a quite tiny school. If he does anything other than take a full 9th grade program, any concern about it being known that he was held back will still be present. The 8th and 9th grade are within the same school, and some classes are always combined. If he takes a full 9th grade program and does fine that would be well and good. If he takes a 9th grade program and does *not* do fine, for example, loses sports eligibility, that will also be known by everyone.  His main reasons for wanting to be at regular school have to do with being able to do all the extras such as particularly sports, theater, maybe class officer. I am really doubtful that he will be able to do those fun extras if he is in 9th grade next year. I am actually doubtful about his being able to do *all* the fun extras he wants to do even as an 8th grader, but it seems to me like a better official grade to try out all those extras that he might want to do (except class officer which requires having been there the prior year) and find out if it is too much or if it is doable.

 

 

Totally agree with the bold part.

[Pen]

Another vote for 9th.

 

He is not young for his grade.  He is right in the middle.

 

"Young" in the immature sense, emotionally young.  

 

If the public school is that small, I'm going to guess your options for dual enrollment or other advanced classes are probably quite limited without driving a long distance. So, I'd be inclined to put him in 9th grade this fall (I'd probably be inclined to do that regardless, but in a small town, definitely).

 

It has few options in senses like only having one foreign language available (and not one I'd prefer, nor that he has been studying on Duolingo by his own preference). No IB or AP type classes--though self study for AP exams and taking them elsewhere can be done.

 

The school has a few classes that are designated "College Now"--they get credit at a community college level. If the offerings there run out, the student can take classes at community college (or maybe even state university)--both are a ways a way, but then he'd presumably be a driver by then.  Running out of local class options and needing to take something at the community college seems like a benefit to me of an 8th grade placement since he'd have some experience dealing with a college class and campus before actually being "in college."

 

My DS turned 14 this week and will be in 9th grade in August and he has some issues and a 504 plan in place.

 

You may need to check with the school. Where i live high school is done on credits not grade level like in elem or middle school. That means that the number of credits determines the student's status. If a student wanted to "skip" a high school year, that would mean having to complete all required credits in three years rather than 4 (or 4+ for those who take some HS credits in 8th grade). if your son takes 3 HS credits in 8th grade, then wants to graduate with the kids who stated HS a year earlier, he will have to find a way to take extra classes such as summer school to get all the credits he needs to graduate.

if he is in 8th grade in the fall, I would not plan on him graduating with the kids who start 9th grade this fall.

I agree that physical size does not seem like a good reason to keep him in 8th grade.

 

Good points.

 

24 credits are needed to graduate. There are 7 classes possible per year, with each being a credit, so that if needed (and if allowed) , 7 x 3 = 21, plus the 4 high school classes next year, if allowed to count, would be 25.  A program he is likely to take next summer anyway likely can give another credit.  4 years of LA are required, so that 9th grade English would be needed to be taken this next year to make it conceivably possible, still possible if he only takes 3 high school classes this year and no summer program that would count, so long as Algebra 1, 9th grade English and probably the music history class are among the 3.

 

To be advanced after starting in 8th next year, my guess is he'd need to have straight A's or close. However,  if he starts in 9th next year he can probably just get a C average or better and still be allowed to do sports as he wishes, though that would not be a very good scenario for college if he chooses to go to college. 

 

The grade level is important in terms of which end of year class trip is taken, which grade's potential class officer position might be sought, which athletic group is designated for competition, and so on, separate from fulfilling graduation requirements. 

 

 

 

I guess I don't give much concern to age as I do to maturity. I have a son who will turn 19 in March of his senior year, GASP!! Who cares?! So what if he's going to be 19 for 2 months before he graduates. I asked my son and he doesn't care because we were going to try and accelerate things so he graduated the year he turns 18 but he doesn't want to and I feel that he needs that extra year to mature a bit more before entering the Army, which is what he wants to do.

 

I have an older son that I held back one year after trying out ps and finding out it did more harm than good. He turned 19 the end of May in his senior year and graduated in June, again he didn't care either. He went into the Airforce and thanked me for that extra year.

 

I would take into consideration his wants, maturity, and if he will be able to do 9th grade work, which it sounds as if he can. You know your child the best so don't do things based on age, do what's right based on what you know your son is capable of and remember too that he won't be scarred if you chose to put him in 8th grade.

 

 

I'll send you a PM as your other post offered.  

 

 I know that he is capable of *understanding* material at a Great Courses level and has been for awhile.

 

But I guess that I do *not* think he is capable of doing a full 9th grade program level *output* of work yet, including all the juggling, balancing, organizing and so on that will be needed at the 9th grade level.  

 

I know that in his co-op this past year his ultimate work output was best in all but one class--but I also know that it took my doing a lot of being his EF center for him, and that unless it was a hands-on especially science related type project, every inch of progress was "like pulling teeth" to get him to get started, focus, stay on task, etc.  And this last year he only had at the most two subjects at a time that were requiring output from him, not as I expect for next year, regardless of grade placement, 4 or 5 classes at a time expecting some form of output and study.  I'm not able or willing to be his EF center for the rest of his schooling, nor do I think it would serve him in the long run. It is one of the reasons from my POV that he needs to go to regular school next year. And I guess that I see 8th grade as a better time for him to take the EF reigns and possibly fail and learn from that than 9th grade.

 

I think he thinks he will have straight A's whichever grade he is in. I don't think so. But would certainly be happy to be proved wrong about that.

 

I think he is likely to only learn things about needing to write down or record assignments, keep track of materials, study (!), start projects sooner than the last minute, and so on if he has to do it and suffers some hard consequences from not doing it. I guess I'd prefer the hard consequences to come when they matter less for college or his future choices.

 

Originally I thought that he should be in 8th grade and take all 8th grade level classes except for Algebra 1 and the one special music class for its hi interest level so that he would not be bored, and otherwise with relatively easier material content be able to work on all the Executive Function areas, getting used to the demands of regular school and so on. This was already run by the special ed advisor and agreed to, along with supports like computer use to type, recorder for lectures and to catch assignments and/or Livescribe pen etc.

 

 

Because he now says he wants to be in 9th, I have been looking at other options like taking more 9th grade level classes: Lang. Arts, one of the elective arts classes that could allow him to move up later, maybe, if allowed.

 

If he did go into 9th grade next year, I think he would need to have one class period be a study hall, so what he'd have to give up might also be a consideration--probably either music history or art.  Probably if he were in 9th grade next year his classes would be:

 

Algebra 1

9th grade Lang. Arts

9th grade science

9th grade social science

health (I think required)

high school choir

study hall

 

 

 

I'm now thinking toward trying to have this be a decision making exercise...  making a list of benefits and negatives that we each can anticipate for each of the possible placements and considering them.  

 

And maybe we need to try to map out a whole possible program for the 4 or 5 possible years as case may be and see what he thinks of them.

[MinivanMom]

*snip*

 

If he did go into 9th grade next year, I think he would need to have one class period be a study hall, so what he'd have to give up might also be a consideration--probably either music history or art.  Probably if he were in 9th grade next year his classes would be:

 

Algebra 1

9th grade Lang. Arts

9th grade science

9th grade social science

health (I think required)

high school choir

study hall

 

 

 

I'm now thinking toward trying to have this be a decision making exercise...  making a list of benefits and negatives that we each can anticipate for each of the possible placements and considering them.  

 

And maybe we need to try to map out a whole possible program for the 4 or 5 possible years as case may be and see what he thinks of them.

 

I think that sounds like a great idea. I would probably have him be the one to map it out, though I would still sit beside him, so that he can take ownership of the process and really think through the pro's and con's of 8th versus 9th. 

 

And I think that 9th grade schedule looks great. It makes a lot of sense for him to have study hall instead of music history if you're concerned about the transition to 9th. He may really surprise you, though. The more excited and positive he is about making the transition to high school, the more likely it is that he will be motivated to work hard and excel.

[Haiku]

A February birthday puts him exactly in the middle age-wise for grade 9. Turning 15 in February of 8th grade would be unusual.

[AggieMama]

I taught high school for 8 years and have seen a wide range on 9th graders come in. There were some years we had 9th grade boys look like they belonged in 3rd grade because of their size, but over the course of year and that magical summer between 9th and 10th grade they shot up to be the same size as all the other boys. Kids grow at different rates. I have seen the same thing with maturity. I wouldn't hold a kid back who is academically ready for 9th grade, especially if they want to go to 9th grade. 9th grade is s year for all kids to learn the executive functioning skills, and most kids stumble a few times in 9th grade, but they pick themselves up and dust themselves off. 9th grade is really a learning process.

[luuknam]

I think he thinks he will have straight A's whichever grade he is in. I don't think so. But would certainly be happy to be proved wrong about that.

 

Some kids thrive on challenge, and flounder when bored... as in, some kids make As with material that's borderline too hard, and Cs or w/e with material that's too easy. Not saying that's what will happen, especially since you're talking about having him take a college now class and a high school class or two, but just wanted to do an "easier does not automatically mean better grades" PSA.

[Library Momma]

does your son play spring sports?  Just keep in mind that in some states a student is ineligilble to play High School sports once they turn 19.  

[Targhee]

"Young" in the immature sense, emotionally young.

 

<snip>

 

To be advanced after starting in 8th next year, my guess is he'd need to have straight A's or close. However, if he starts in 9th next year he can probably just get a C average or better and still be allowed to do sports as he wishes, though that would not be a very good scenario for college if he chooses to go to college.

 

 

 

<snip>

 

I know that he is capable of *understanding* material at a Great Courses level and has been for awhile.

 

But I guess that I do *not* think he is capable of doing a full 9th grade program level *output* of work yet, including all the juggling, balancing, organizing and so on that will be needed at the 9th grade level.

 

I know that in his co-op this past year his ultimate work output was best in all but one class--but I also know that it took my doing a lot of being his EF center for him, and that unless it was a hands-on especially science related type project, every inch of progress was "like pulling teeth" to get him to get started, focus, stay on task, etc. And this last year he only had at the most two subjects at a time that were requiring output from him, not as I expect for next year, regardless of grade placement, 4 or 5 classes at a time expecting some form of output and study. I'm not able or willing to be his EF center for the rest of his schooling, nor do I think it would serve him in the long run. It is one of the reasons from my POV that he needs to go to regular school next year. And I guess that I see 8th grade as a better time for him to take the EF reigns and possibly fail and learn from that than 9th grade.

 

I think he thinks he will have straight A's whichever grade he is in. I don't think so. But would certainly be happy to be proved wrong about that.

 

I think he is likely to only learn things about needing to write down or record assignments, keep track of materials, study (!), start projects sooner than the last minute, and so on if he has to do it and suffers some hard consequences from not doing it. I guess I'd prefer the hard consequences to come when they matter less for college or his future choices.

 

Originally I thought that he should be in 8th grade and take all 8th grade level classes except for Algebra 1 and the one special music class for its hi interest level so that he would not be bored, and otherwise with relatively easier material content be able to work on all the Executive Function areas, getting used to the demands of regular school and so on. This was already run by the special ed advisor and agreed to, along with supports like computer use to type, recorder for lectures and to catch assignments and/or Livescribe pen etc.

 

 

Because he now says he wants to be in 9th, I have been looking at other options like taking more 9th grade level classes: Lang. Arts, one of the elective arts classes that could allow him to move up later, maybe, if allowed.

 

If he did go into 9th grade next year, I think he would need to have one class period be a study hall, so what he'd have to give up might also be a consideration--probably either music history or art. Probably if he were in 9th grade next year his classes would be:

 

Algebra 1

9th grade Lang. Arts

9th grade science

9th grade social science

health (I think required)

high school choir

study hall

 

 

 

I'm now thinking toward trying to have this be a decision making exercise... making a list of benefits and negatives that we each can anticipate for each of the possible placements and considering them.

 

And maybe we need to try to map out a whole possible program for the 4 or 5 possible years as case may be and see what he thinks of them.

I see the bolded as significant, trumping factors for choosing 8th grade.

 

Working ahead in some classes now (eg math and one or two others) will give him more wiggle room credit-wise when he begins high school to take a study hall or an "easy" class with little output. This way you can ease into the high demand for EF skills.

 

That's a hard call to make though. His preference is important - very important. Why in the world do we have grade levels anyway??? Why can't kids just move at their own pace and associate with whichever age peers they choose?

 

Best wishes in this hard decision.

[Mosaicmind]

does your son play spring sports? Just keep in mind that in some states a student is ineligilble to play High School sports once they turn 19.

My son will turn 19 the March of senior year and he will still be eligible. Our school states that they can't play if they turn 19 the first semester of their senior year, not if they turn 19 during the second semester. Specifically ours states it like this, "Rostered players should not be older than 18 years of age on July 4, 2016, if they want to play during the 2016-2017 school year." If her son turns 19 in February of his senior year then he will be fine. This is pretty typical across the state's.

[Pen]

does your son play spring sports?  Just keep in mind that in some states a student is ineligilble to play High School sports once they turn 19.  

 

 

I don't know what sports he will decide he likes. But the rule here is that they cannot have turned 19 prior to the start of their senior year.  Also, they cannot be in a 5th year of high school no matter what their age. So kids who do not do well in 9th grade lose eligibility that year due to low grades, and then if they repeat the year, they also lose their eligibility in their senior year apparently.

[Pen]

I think that sounds like a great idea. I would probably have him be the one to map it out, though I would still sit beside him, so that he can take ownership of the process and really think through the pro's and con's of 8th versus 9th. 

 

And I think that 9th grade schedule looks great. It makes a lot of sense for him to have study hall instead of music history if you're concerned about the transition to 9th. He may really surprise you, though. The more excited and positive he is about making the transition to high school, the more likely it is that he will be motivated to work hard and excel.

 

 

He is a seat of the pants type. The idea of his being the one to map it out is great in theory, but I do think once again that is an EF skill that is beyond him.  Much farther beyond him than writing down an assignment, which I think he *could* do, but doesn't. 

 

Can your rising 8th or 9th graders make a 4 or 5 year plan for high school or high school plus 8th grade classes?

 

All he has planned out is the part that matters to him:

 

cross country in fall, wrestling in winter, either baseball or track and field in spring. Plus ice skating.  He is not excited about anything academic so far as I can tell.

[Arcadia]

Can your rising 8th or 9th graders make a 4 or 5 year plan for high school or high school plus 8th grade classes?.

The 8th graders in my local public schools have a guidance counselor to meet around April/May to discuss 9th grade plans. They have a four year high school planning template to look at. Everything is very guided.

 

The high schoolers can make appointments to see the guidance counsellors any time they are free (study hall/after school). They can change their plan every year even though they have a tentative four year plan. My district's high schools are on a yearly system so it is hard to switch subjects midyear.

 

I had posted this link for my state U before so you might have seen it. Link is for the high school planner. You can see on page 3-5 how guided it is.

http://admission.universityofcalifornia.edu/counselors/files/My_Academic_Planner-EAOP.pdf

 

My hubby and I were under the UK style system that specialised earlier so planning was very streamlined. If someone wanted to be a doctor for example, there is very little choice of high school subjects.

[MinivanMom]

The 8th graders in my local public schools have a guidance counselor to meet around April/May to discuss 9th grade plans. They have a four year high school planning template to look at. Everything is very guided.

 

The high schoolers can make appointments to see the guidance counsellors any time they are free (study hall/after school). They can change their plan every year even though they have a tentative four year plan. My district's high schools are on a yearly system so it is hard to switch subjects midyear.

 

I had posted this link for my state U before so you might have seen it. Link is for the high school planner. You can see on page 3-5 how guided it is.

http://admission.universityofcalifornia.edu/counselors/files/My_Academic_Planner-EAOP.pdf

 

My hubby and I were under the UK style system that specialised earlier so planning was very streamlined. If someone wanted to be a doctor for example, there is very little choice of high school subjects.

 

They do something similar here. The counselors give a series of presentations in 8th grade homerooms in Jan to discuss four year high school planning, graduation requirements, college entrance requirements, and classes available to 9th graders. In the presentations, the 8th graders are each given information on the requirements and a template to fill in with their four year high school plan. About a month later (end of Feb), each 8th grader meets individually with their counselor to register for 9th grade classes.

 

The 8th graders have to take a copy of their 9th grade class registration home for their parents to sign before it is final, but the assumption is that students are taking on the responsibility of planning themselves. In reality, most parents help their kids with the 4-yr planning template or they at least check it over before their kid goes into the counselor to register for classes. 

[Jackie]

He is a seat of the pants type. The idea of his being the one to map it out is great in theory, but I do think once again that is an EF skill that is beyond him. Much farther beyond him than writing down an assignment, which I think he *could* do, but doesn't.

 

Can your rising 8th or 9th graders make a 4 or 5 year plan for high school or high school plus 8th grade classes?

 

All he has planned out is the part that matters to him:

 

cross country in fall, wrestling in winter, either baseball or track and field in spring. Plus ice skating. He is not excited about anything academic so far as I can tell.

Some scaffolding might be appropriate here. If you made two grids, one for a 4-year plan and the other for a 5-year plan, with nine slots for each year, then labeled them as:

Slot 1: Math

Slot 2: English

Slot 3: Science

Slot 4: Social Studies

Slot 5: Foreign language/elective

Slot 6: Elective

Slot 7: Elective/Study Hall

Slot 8: Extracurricular

Slot 9: Extracurricular

 

. . . Could he fill that in?

[Library Momma]

My son will turn 19 the March of senior year and he will still be eligible. Our school states that they can't play if they turn 19 the first semester of their senior year, not if they turn 19 during the second semester. Specifically ours states it like this, "Rostered players should not be older than 18 years of age on July 4, 2016, if they want to play during the 2016-2017 school year." If her son turns 19 in February of his senior year then he will be fine. This is pretty typical across the state's.

 

 

That is good.  That doesn't happen here.  It doesn't matter when their birthday is, if they are 19 they are ineligible.  It is a state mandate not a district one and I have heard of a few people blindsided by this.

[Pen]

Some scaffolding might be appropriate here. If you made two grids, one for a 4-year plan and the other for a 5-year plan, with nine slots for each year, then labeled them as:

Slot 1: Math

Slot 2: English

Slot 3: Science

Slot 4: Social Studies

Slot 5: Foreign language/elective

Slot 6: Elective

Slot 7: Elective/Study Hall

Slot 8: Extracurricular

Slot 9: Extracurricular

 

. . . Could he fill that in?

 

 

Maybe. I'll give it a try.  

 

He has agreed now that he will be an "8th grader" next year, provided that he has enough high school credits to possibly move ahead or graduate early if he wants to. I asked him which class has nicer kids. He said they both have nice kids. I asked which might make it more likely to be a class officer if he wanted to be one. He said that the current 7th graders already wanted him to be a class officer (because, he said, none of them wanted to fill out the paperwork), but the school said he couldn't until he has been there a whole year.

 

Looking at what you wrote I see that there are likely 3 extracurriculars (ice skating, school sport, music) which probably means he needs a study hall even if he is taking some 8th grade classes, or there just won't be enough afternoon left for all his homework. I am now hoping that the music history class can take the place of an 8th grade social studies class.

Something like:

 

Algebra

9th grade English

Music History

 

8th grade science

 

choir

art

study hall

 

This actually would give 5, maybe even 6, high school credits because the music history is 3 credits.

 

I wish he'd go into 8th grade English to make that a little easier, but to meet his goal of maybe being able to move up or graduate early he really will need the 9th grade class in that to be able to have 4 years of high school language arts credits.

[Mosaicmind]

Ok, maybe I'm not understanding this but are you saying that your school allows 8th graders to take 9th grade/high school classes? That would be something new. Here, the only high school class 8th graders can take is algebra 1 and that's if they have teacher approval. If they were allowed, which they aren't, to take any others they would have to go to the 9th grade school or the high school here. The 9th graders here go to a school just for them to prepare them for high school. The 9th grade school building is attached somewhat to the high school building by a very long hallway because some 9th graders do have classes in the big building.

 

Anyway, what you are planning wouldn't happen here or in the school systems from where we came from in Indiana. I would go to the school, if they are open like ours are in the summer, and see if he can even do this. I would hate for you guys to have something all lined up and find out that he can't take high school classes while in 8th grade.

 

Also, here if a student does take algebra 1 in 8th, which is the only high school class 8th can take, they don't get it counted as a credit towards the credits they need for graduation. It will show up on their transcript that they took it and the grade but the grade won't be factored into their gpa and they won't get a credit for it. So, I would wonder if he can take high school classes first and if he can will be get the credit for them or not. Just some things to ask.

[Pen]

Ok, maybe I'm not understanding this but are you saying that your school allows 8th graders to take 9th grade/high school classes? Yes.

 

 

That would be something new. Here, the only high school class 8th graders can take is algebra 1 and that's if they have teacher approval. If they were allowed, which they aren't, to take any others they would have to go to the 9th grade school or the high school here. The 9th graders here go to a school just for them to prepare them for high school. The 9th grade school building is attached somewhat to the high school building by a very long hallway because some 9th graders do have classes in the big building.

 

Anyway, what you are planning wouldn't happen here or in the school systems from where we came from in Indiana. I would go to the school, if they are open like ours are in the summer, and see if he can even do this. I would hate for you guys to have something all lined up and find out that he can't take high school classes while in 8th grade.

 

Also, here if a student does take algebra 1 in 8th, which is the only high school class 8th can take, they don't get it counted as a credit towards the credits they need for graduation. It will show up on their transcript that they took it and the grade but the grade won't be factored into their gpa and they won't get a credit for it. So, I would wonder if he can take high school classes first and if he can will be get the credit for them or not. Just some things to ask.

 

 

 

Our school has 7th to 12th grade all together in one (small) place. I've already been told that students in 7th and 8th can take high school level classes. Each class /teacher has its own rules as to prerequisites, permissions, etc.  Ds has already been invited/encouraged to take the advanced music history class by the music teacher with whom he has taken an extracurricular class.

 

The credit issue is something we'll need to ask about, I may have wrongly assumed that a high school level class would carry high school credit, but the school is not open again until August.

 

When I was in school in New York City, I went to a private school that had all of 1st to 12th in one building with flexibility for at least 4th graders and up to take what they were ready to take, not necessarily what fit their "grade" level. Our local school is not that flexible, but it is somewhat flexible. This is partly due to how small it is, and not having separate locations for middle and high school.

[MinivanMom]

Our school has 7th to 12th grade all together in one (small) place. I've already been told that students in 7th and 8th can take high school level classes. Each class /teacher has its own rules as to prerequisites, permissions, etc.  Ds has already been invited/encouraged to take the advanced music history class by the music teacher with whom he has taken an extracurricular class.

 

The credit issue is something we'll need to ask about, I may have wrongly assumed that a high school level class would carry high school credit, but the school is not open again until August.

 

When I was in school in New York City, I went to a private school that had all of 1st to 12th in one building with flexibility for at least 4th graders and up to take what they were ready to take, not necessarily what fit their "grade" level. Our local school is not that flexible, but it is somewhat flexible. This is partly due to how small it is, and not having separate locations for middle and high school.

 

Yes, this is definitely the big question at this point. Some schools will count those high school classes taken in 8th grade toward total credits required for graduation and some won't.

 

I would also ask very specifically about the possibility of skipping 9th grade or of graduating a year early (however you want to look at it). Some schools allow early graduation if you meet the credit requirements, but there are other schools that don't allow it under any circumstances.

 

Even if the school is not opening again until August, could some of this information possibly be on the school's website? I know our local high school has the school district "High School Planning Guide" right on their website, which is almost 100 pages of rules and credit policies and course descriptions. Private schools don't always have that much information publicly available, but public schools usually do; you just have to dig around on their website to find it.

[Pen]

Ours seems a little limited and not updated since 2014.  It referred to the state guidelines.  Another larger school district in our state made clear that Algebra 1 taken in 8th grade can be taken for high school credit, but did not clarify about other classes.  

 

This quote from the state (Oregon) guidelines clearly seems to allow for early graduation, but otherwise does not seem clear to me as to the raised questions: 

 

 

"Students who take longer than four years to graduate are not required to complete additional state requirements. The same is true for students who leave school and return at a later date. Students who are planning an early graduation (with a regular or modified diploma) must also meet the diploma requirements for their cohort group based on the year the student first enrolled in grade 9.

The table below shows graduation requirements applied to the students’ cohort year. Changes in the requirements as they are phased in are highlighted in the shaded boxes."

 

Requirements  -- 24 Credits total:

1

 

 

 

English/LA – 4 credits

 

Math – 3 credits; content at

Algebra I and above 2

 

Science – 3 credits

Scientific inquiry and lab experiences1

 

Social Sciences – 3 credits

 

PE – 1 credit

 

 

Health – 1 credit

 

 

CTE/Arts/2nd Lang.– 3 credits

 

 

Electives – 6 credits

 

 

 

 

 

 

In general a year course seems to be 1 credit, but there are exceptions, such as the music history course is apparently 3 credits.

 

 

I 

[Lori D.]

...He is 14 with a February birthdate, somewhat on the young side and small for his age...

… He started Kindergarten with the group of kids who will be in 9th grade this next year. Then he...did an extra year of kindergarten putting him... in 7th grade at this time...

 

...He seems really young and really small compared to the rising 9th grade class, but he seems really old and advanced compared to … the rising 8th grade class.

...It is a very small rural school…with... 12 kids in the current rising 8th grade class… and... not many more than that in the rising 9th grade class...

 

...I was thinking … 8th grader next year, giving... time to transition back to the public school grind, as well as... some help to him in sports and other activities he wants to do, not to be as hard competition and not as grueling a schedule--and… giving him a chance to get some more maturity and seriousness about academics...

 

...However, he would like to be in 9th with his former Kindy classmates.

 

...My son is bright, but also has dyslexia and dysgraphia issues, as well as being extremely shy at least currently. But he is also very social and probably more interested in the social, sports, and arts aspects of school than the academic aspects at this time.

...Despite his shyness, he was talking about being a class officer and how he'd like to do that at some point.

 

...the location of the middle and senior high schools are together so that kids can go to classes at either quite easily.

… if he were placed in 8th, but allowed to take more advanced classes, which classes would make moving ahead the following year (that is skipping 9th and moving into his original class group in 10th) likely most feasible?

 

… He will be in Algebra 1 next year in math. Everything else would probably be pretty easy with 8th grade placement and classes...

 

…My own thought if all this would fit in a schedule, would be to register as an 8th grader and to take that one College Now class, Algebra 1, and maybe one  9th grade level class such as Language Arts, then science and social studies with the 8th graders, plus 2 arts type classes such as choir and visual arts, for his 7 classes-- giving him some challenge and some fun. And then to allow him to choose one sport per term at the public school, and to require him to continue his current music and his ice skating as extracurriculars.

 

...Our school has 7th to 12th grade all together in one (small) place. I've already been told that students in 7th and 8th can take high school level classes.

… Each class /teacher has its own rules as to prerequisites, permissions, etc.  

… Ds has already been invited/encouraged to take the advanced music history class by the music teacher with whom he has taken an extracurricular class.

 

Pen -- coming late to this thread, but just wanted to encourage you. :) Based on everything you said in your posts, and due to the wonderful flexibility of the school, I don't see any really bad downside to starting DS in 8th grade at the school, with a few classes with the 9th graders.

 

This sounds like a great plan. Everything you say in your initial post suggests 8th grade, with the benefit of the option to do 9th grade work in the areas he is ready for 9th grade. The only two things I see that are giving you pause are his chronological age, and that he says he'd like to be in 9th grade with his "kinder friends".

 

Since he is physical small and emotionally young, it is all to his benefit to do 8th grade, which allows him to fit in physically/emotionally with his classmates, and allows him to be a leader, rather than allows struggling to just keep up at the back of the pack.

 

Since the school is flexible about allowing younger students to work with the older grades, DS will have the benefit academically -- and it has the added benefit of spending time with and befriending both 8th and 9th grade students.

 

And, there's a very good chance that DS will take off somewhere in the next year or two and finish early, which the school would be fine with and likely help facilitate. So, win-win there, too.

 

The only "downsides" you mention are his chronological age and that he would like to be with his Kinder friends.

 

re: age, I'd suggest that since the school has students of various "grades" working together in classes, age is really not going to be something the students focus on; and since DS would be starting off with 1-2 9th grade classes, there's no reason why he might not complete the required high school credits for graduation in 4 years anyways -- esp. if he continues with the College Now courses.

 

Lots of students graduate at 19yo -- one of ours turned 19 four weeks before graduating -- so it's really not a big deal. This DS has always been physically small and emotionally young; even after "right-sizing" him from kinder to pre-school at age 5 (he was in a private school for pre-K, K, and 1st gr.), he was always the oldest/next to oldest in the class BUT always the smallest/next to smallest student physically. Being 6-12 months older than the other students put him right about on target emotionally, and in later years when we were homeschooling, it allowed DS to work ahead academically, while being able to be a bit more mature which gave him the courage to step out occasionally and be a leader. Or to try new activities in high school, without feeling stressed about trying to keep up with the academic workload -- he never would have been involved with those activities if he had skipped him back up a grade for high school, as he would have been too stressed about the academics. But that was just our DS and his experiences -- you know your DS best! :)

 

 

re: Kinder friends… My guess is that he says this because he will be doing something new, and feels that "familiar faces" will make that transition easier. However, those students have had 8 years of schooling together *without* your DS in their midst -- so, unless DS was doing a lot with these 9th graders outside of school over the past 8 years, these students have developed a close bond that DS is not sharing with them, and there may not be the closeness (at least immediately) with these students that he is imagining there will be. And it might be harder to be in student leadership the way he would like, as the students already have established relational "roles" and expectations of one another over the past 8 years. Also, if he's taking a few 9th grade classes, he *will* get to see them and reestablish ties, while also meeting and befriending the 8th grade class, where he might have an easier time getting elected to a student leadership role.

 

Just a few random thoughts, FWIW. BEST of luck, whatever you decide Pen -- and very BEST wishes for success and enjoyment of new academics and adventures for your DS (and ease of transition for all of you)! Warmest regards, Lori D.

[Mosaicmind]

Lori D. said everything I've been trying to say or wanted to in favor of him staying back in 8th. This is what I'm sure we would do if given this quandary, but I guess you never know for sure until you are there.

 

If he's somewhat bummed about hanging back in 8th, you can always talk about the possibilities of still graduating earlier etc. It doesn't have to seem like the end of the world, though I don't know how your son will react. I guess I can see the positives and I try to focus on them. I've also seen bright homeschooled kids who graduated early or even right on time but didn't have the maturity to handle college or the work world and fell hard.

 

We have good friends who had their daughter skip 8th grade so she could be in high school at the same time as her older brother. She is extremely smart and was definitely ready in that respect but still too immature for that age. Skip forward, this year was her first year at college, she was 17 when first semester began and she decided to go to one a few states away from mom and dad. Not long into first semester she's swept off her feet by boyfriend and starts struggling in school, grades slipping and just not fitting in. Second semester comes and her and boyfriend come back to her house during spring break, which is when they break the news that mom and dad will be grandparents in September. I'm not an expert on this but I wonder if she hadn't been pushed to skip a grade and grow up quickly if she would be pregnant today. There are other girls that didn't have this happen that I know too, but maturity wise they were ready.

[Pen]

Thanks!

 

We won't know details till we go to registration and learn what can be taken when--could be classes that sound desirable will overlap in some way to make it impossible, but it seems to be coming together that ds will be registered for 8th grade. 

 

The biggest quandary now seems to be Language Arts as the 8th or 9th grade class option.  It is the most key class needed to move up a grade level or to graduate early, because 4 years of high school level LA are required, and none of his likely summer activities would make that up if he misses it, without deliberately turning a summer into classes to accelerate high school rather than doing what he wants to do and having that happen to count for extra credits.   OTOH, I think 8th grade LA might be helpful given his dyslexia/dysgraphia issues, to be able to review grammar, and so on with less pressure--and also with a smaller class of kids.  Then again, OTOH, the reading selections for 9th grade LA are more likely to interest him than the 8th grade choices.  

 

 

 

 

He seems to have already been asked by some rising 8th graders to be a class officer--but then learned he could not be due to not having been there the prior year which is required. He does not seem to realize that that might be significant and sort of downplayed it when he mentioned it to me--which only happened because I directly asked him which class had the nicer kids (he said they both have nice kids), and if he were interested in being a class officer which class would that be more likely to happen in (at which point he mentioned that rising 8th graders wanted him to (because according to him, they didn't want to fill out the paperwork needed to apply)). But to me it already makes it seem like the rising 8th grade will be fine socially.  I definitely think that things like not being one of the last in a class to be eligible to get a driver's license will be helpful and take off some pressure.

 

He seemed to most get over being bummed about the 8th grade placement idea when I pointed out that if he likes middle/high school (and while lots of kids don't, I suspect he might be one who does), getting 5 years to enjoy it might be nice, while if he doesn't like it, then being able to speed it up and get out of there in 4 years would still be an option.