What do you think of s*x comfort products for menopausal women?

[SparklyUnicorn]

I know what a question.  I'm seeing commercials and ads popping up everywhere for these products.  Every time I read the precautions and side affects I think I'd rather have painful sex than deal with that.  Or drink a shot beforehand.  Or gee not have sex...

 

Anyhow the latest one I saw is called Estring.  If you go to their website you'll see what I mean with precautions and side affects.

 

Of course where are the products that increase sex drive?  We only get more comfortable sex...if we don't want sex...tough luck?  Do menopausal women have a greater sex drive (I'm holding out hope here)? 

 

It's annoying to have no sex drive. 

 

I dunno..I just find these products kinda weird and I could think of better ways to deal with that particular problem. 

 

This is all probably TMI, but hey what haven't we talked about here?! 

[kewb]

I'll just stick with astroglide.

[Laura Corin]

Love them.  My major menopause symptom is dryness.  I use a hormonal pessary once a week and I have no problems.  No side effects and no systemic effect - it's localised.  Sex drive is fine.

Edited June 9, 2016 by Laura Corin

[SparklyUnicorn]

Love them.  My major menopause symptom is dryness.  I use a hormonal pessary once a week and I have no problems.  No side effects and no systemic effect - it's localised.  Sex drive is fine.

 

That's interesting.  It must be something different.  The other thing is basically inserted and kept in there for three months.

[Laura Corin]

That's interesting.  It must be something different.  The other thing is basically inserted and kept in there for three months.

 

Yes.  My pessary dissolves and enough hormone is absorbed into the walls to cause them to carry on lubricating and not become thin.

 

http://www.myvmc.com/drugs/vagifem-pessaries/

Edited June 10, 2016 by Laura Corin

[PrincessMommy]

I know what a question.  I'm seeing commercials and ads popping up everywhere for these products.  Every time I read the precautions and side affects I think I'd rather have painful sex than deal with that.  Or drink a shot beforehand.  Or gee not have sex...

 

Anyhow the latest one I saw is called Estring.  If you go to their website you'll see what I mean with precautions and side affects.

 

Of course where are the products that increase sex drive?  We only get more comfortable sex...if we don't want sex...tough luck?  Do menopausal women have a greater sex drive (I'm holding out hope here)? 

 

It's annoying to have no sex drive. 

 

I dunno..I just find these products kinda weird and I could think of better ways to deal with that particular problem. 

 

This is all probably TMI, but hey what haven't we talked about here?! 

 

Seriously!  That is exactly what I think anytime I see those commercials.

 

Although, I am convinced that 'normal" sex drive is probably not the right phrase.  My body is finishing up having babies... it's wondering what all the fuss is about doing something that creates babies.   It's not really needed anymore, from an evolutionary standpoint. KWIM??   But, our modern sex-crazed society (and men) seem to think it's not "normal" to be less interested when you're menopausal.   Sigh. 

 

sorry, soap box issue for me.

 

[SparklyUnicorn]

Seriously!  That is exactly what I think anytime I see those commercials.

 

Although, I am convinced that 'normal" sex drive is probably not the right phrase.  My body is finishing up having babies... it's wondering what all the fuss is about doing something that creates babies.   It's not really needed anymore, from an evolutionary standpoint. KWIM??   But, our modern sex-crazed society (and men) seem to think it's not "normal" to be less interested when you're menopausal.   Sigh. 

 

sorry, soap box issue for me.

 

 

It's a soap box issue for me too.  I totally hear you.  I feel bad ONLY because I know my husband wants to have sex.  But most of the time I really don't want to anymore.  The advice I've read is absolutely ridiculous.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Preach it! I keep trying to explain to dh that my decreased sex drive isn't a reflection on him, but that it's **NORMAL** and biologically RIGHT that my body will be less... "ready and willing" at this time in my life. He's trying to understand, bless his heart.

 

I once said something to my husband about how maybe it's just this period of time in my life and he said oh yeah he knows he read about it. LOL  Well at least he tries to figure me out. 

[TranquilMind]

Seriously!  That is exactly what I think anytime I see those commercials.

 

Although, I am convinced that 'normal" sex drive is probably not the right phrase.  My body is finishing up having babies... it's wondering what all the fuss is about doing something that creates babies.   It's not really needed anymore, from an evolutionary standpoint. KWIM??   But, our modern sex-crazed society (and men) seem to think it's not "normal" to be less interested when you're menopausal.   Sigh. 

 

sorry, soap box issue for me.

 

 

I think what you state here - and I shudder when the long list of horrible side effects are grudgingly read while happy people are playing tennis or running on the beach or ANYTHING so that you won't pay attention to what you are hearing. 

[MotherGoose]

Seriously! That is exactly what I think anytime I see those commercials.

 

Although, I am convinced that 'normal" sex drive is probably not the right phrase. My body is finishing up having babies... it's wondering what all the fuss is about doing something that creates babies. It's not really needed anymore, from an evolutionary standpoint. KWIM?? But, our modern sex-crazed society (and men) seem to think it's not "normal" to be less interested when you're menopausal. Sigh.

 

sorry, soap box issue for me.

 

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

 

I'm still waiting for that to happen, but no.

 

Oddly when I was pregnant I had a crazy strong sex drive.  It was pretty much the only time in my life it was that strong.  I don't know what to make of that.

[PrincessMommy]

It's a soap box issue for me too.  I totally hear you.  I feel bad ONLY because I know my husband wants to have sex.  But most of the time I really don't want to anymore.  The advice I've read is absolutely ridiculous.

 

me too. 

[PrincessMommy]

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

 

I never did.  It seemed like a slow steady decline.   My drive seemed to rise an fall with my ovulation cycle too.   Now it doesn't seem to do that, even though I know I'm ovulating (I can feel it - and I'm still getting periods).  I'm 52, I wish it would stop already...but that's a different subject. :)

Edited June 9, 2016 by PrincessMommy

[hornblower]

The products are designed to help alleviate the issue of skin thinning which can make things very uncomfortable and can lead to loss of interest. 

It's a very low dose hormone replacement with apparently much lower risks and side effects than the regular hrt.  

They function differently than just a lubricant. 

 

[KungFuPanda]

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

Waiting for this answer . . . um . . . for a friend.

 

I just chalked the increased energy up to having teenagers who physically need me much less and being able to get all the sleep I need. I'm 43. This thread is making me sad. I'm afraid to look up these products.

[Farrar]

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

 

Yes. I'm there too. And ditto.

[Bluegoat]

Small hijack...did you ladies notice an increase in drive before menopause? I don't nerve to ask this as an original question....but it would make sense that you would, right, like your body knows the factory is about to shut down? Not complaining...but sad if it will end. Probably helps that I'm not on hormonal birth control.

 

Yes, like, through the roof.  My poor husband was shocked.

 

ETA - I think that it is related to testosterone being relatively higher, because estrogen is decreasing.  It's much more noticible when I am at the lowest estrogen points in my cycle.

 

I also had some similar weeks when I was pregnant with my son.

Edited June 9, 2016 by Bluegoat

[hornblower]

Argh. Now I'm getting pop-up ads for KY. (LOL)

 

omg, how do you live without adblock ! /shudder/

[Bluegoat]

I have mixed feelings about this kind of stuff.  There are women who would still like to have sex, but it is uncomfortable. 

 

The side effects - well, we only have drug commercials on American channels, as they are illegal here, but my impression is that they just read out the list, and those lists include a lot of things that may not even be all that connected to the drug, and give no sense of how common those complications are.  So to my mind, they really need to be looked at with more information.

 

I think our society is not that willing to accept decreasing sex drive as normal, especially since the baby boomers started getting older.  I don't think that is just about women, I think men are targeted that way as much or even more.  Over the last while, 5 years or so, there seems to be a big push about the "male menopause" which mostly seems to mean decreased sex drive, and the need for hormonal intervention to "normalize" the sex drive.

 

There is actually research going on for a female Viagra-type drug, any company would love that, it could make a ton of money.  From what I have read though, it seems to be quite tricky.

 

In all of those cases though, I think the motivation of the drug companies is to medicalize things that are normal, because that means you can get quite a lot of people taking those drugs.

[ktgrok]

I know what a question.  I'm seeing commercials and ads popping up everywhere for these products.  Every time I read the precautions and side affects I think I'd rather have painful sex than deal with that.  Or drink a shot beforehand.  Or gee not have sex...

 

Anyhow the latest one I saw is called Estring.  If you go to their website you'll see what I mean with precautions and side affects.

 

Of course where are the products that increase sex drive?  We only get more comfortable sex...if we don't want sex...tough luck?  Do menopausal women have a greater sex drive (I'm holding out hope here)? 

 

It's annoying to have no sex drive. 

 

I dunno..I just find these products kinda weird and I could think of better ways to deal with that particular problem. 

 

This is all probably TMI, but hey what haven't we talked about here?! 

 

When I asked my Ob/GYN about low sex drive he was very very quick to address the issue. We started with the simplest, supplementing DHEA, because I want to try to conceive, but if that wasn't the case he would have prescribed testosterone for me right then and there. (he also did lab work, my testosterone was at the low end of normal)

[Soror]

Fwiw I've noticed a s*x drive increase with my thyroid labs coming into the optimal range. Of course when desire is low I didn't really miss it b/c I didn't want it anyway. Fwiw we switched to Shibari water based lubricant about 6 months ago and have been impressed. My hormonal issue is low progesterone so I use an OTC cream for it the last half of my cycle. 

[SparklyUnicorn]

The products are designed to help alleviate the issue of skin thinning which can make things very uncomfortable and can lead to loss of interest. 

 

It's a very low dose hormone replacement with apparently much lower risks and side effects than the regular hrt.  

 

They function differently than just a lubricant. 

 

 

 

Although the one I pointed out basically discourages using it for more than 3 months.  What's the point?  Basically it says use for the least amount of time possible.  Again, what's the point?  Thing's aren't exactly going to improve after three months are they?

 

 

[hornblower]

Although the one I pointed out basically discourages using it for more than 3 months.  What's the point?  Basically it says use for the least amount of time possible.  Again, what's the point?  Thing's aren't exactly going to improve after three months are they?

 

Yes, they will. It may require repeated treatment but maybe not. It actually restores some of the tissue & elasticity. 

 

http://patient.info/health/vaginal-dryness-atrophic-vaginitis

[SparklyUnicorn]

I have mixed feelings about this kind of stuff.  There are women who would still like to have sex, but it is uncomfortable. 

 

The side effects - well, we only have drug commercials on American channels, as they are illegal here, but my impression is that they just read out the list, and those lists include a lot of things that may not even be all that connected to the drug, and give no sense of how common those complications are.  So to my mind, they really need to be looked at with more information.

 

I think our society is not that willing to accept decreasing sex drive as normal, especially since the baby boomers started getting older.  I don't think that is just about women, I think men are targeted that way as much or even more.  Over the last while, 5 years or so, there seems to be a big push about the "male menopause" which mostly seems to mean decreased sex drive, and the need for hormonal intervention to "normalize" the sex drive.

 

There is actually research going on for a female Viagra-type drug, any company would love that, it could make a ton of money.  From what I have read though, it seems to be quite tricky.

 

In all of those cases though, I think the motivation of the drug companies is to medicalize things that are normal, because that means you can get quite a lot of people taking those drugs.

 

Repeating the gist of what you say here....

There is a newish drug out there that is supposed to increase drive for women.  My first thought was OH YAY.  Except after I read the arguments as to why this isn't so "oh yay".  The basic argument is that it basically puts pressure on women and tells them they aren't normal for the lowered sex drive. I see that point.  So instead of accepting it and supporting them we find drugs to fix them.  And with that drug in particular women were having on average sex 1 time more per month than usual for them.  This wasn't some sort of awesome thing really. 

 

On another note, what I find interesting is that no female OBGYN doctor has ever asked me about my drive.  I went to a male urologist and he asked me.  I wasn't even there for that reason.  I'm not sure if I should feel like he is being sensitive to my feelings/needs/issues...or not.  I really don't know. He was a nice guy and I did think it was kinda cool he asked.  I didn't answer the question btw. 

 

Ok, but yes honestly I wish I could fix it.  Because I have no drive, but I would like to because I am interested psychologically.  KWIM?  If I think about it..yes I want to change it.  It's not ONLY because I feel like I MUST to please my husband.  Probably because he has put absolutely no pressure on me and has been understanding.  If he was being annoying I might feel differently. 

 

But whatever it is I'd try cannot have a high cancer risk.  Too much cancer in my family in those parts for me to not be highly concerned about that.  My mother took hormones...she got cancer.  Same with other members of my family. 

[Guest]

I hate those commercials. I hate all sex commercials but the ones with the older ladies draping themselves seductively over furniture is high on my annoyance list, second only to the people in the bathtubs outside. I had no idea about all of those problems and now I'm dreading when menopause hits. I would've preferred to live in ignorant bliss, but once I saw the commercial I had to ask my menopausal friends some questions. They were not reassuring. I was hoping it was all a big fat lie by pharmaceutical companies. :(

[MercyA]

nm

Edited June 12, 2016 by MercyA

[SparklyUnicorn]

I hate those commercials. I hate all sex commercials but the ones with the older ladies draping themselves seductively over furniture is high on my annoyance list, second only to the people in the bathtubs outside. I had no idea about all of those problems and now I'm dreading when menopause hits. I would've preferred to live in ignorant bliss, but once I saw the commercial I had to ask my menopausal friends some questions. They were not reassuring. I was hoping it was all a big fat lie by pharmaceutical companies. :(

 

Uh yeah I don't like those either.  Like the sexy woman talking about the older guys who can't get it up there....whatever.  Where is my sexy guy talking about my product? 

[Guest]

Waiting for this answer . . . um . . . for a friend.

 

I just chalked the increased energy up to having teenagers who physically need me much less and being able to get all the sleep I need. I'm 43. This thread is making me sad. I'm afraid to look up these products.

Amen. I'm almost 40. Is this the rest of my life? Internal organs falling out, skin in my favorite place thinning, everything turning gray and sad?? Kill me now.

[The Girls' Mom]

I've had peri-menopausal symptoms for several years now, including the ever-declining sex drive.  Personally?  I don't even want to want to have a drive! lol.  I feel kind of bad for my dh about my lack of interest, but yeah...I would be a-ok to become celibate at this point.  Bleh.  

 

So yeah, those commercials are annoying.  Not all of us have the desire to be all sex-crazed again.

[ktgrok]

To be fair, this isn't a female thing. Men have been bearing the brunt of meds to increase their sex life for years and years. Plus ads to increase their size, stamina, etc. 

 

 

[LucyStoner]

Yes. My pessary dissolves and enough hormone is absorbed into the walls to cause them to carry on lubricating.

 

http://www.myvmc.com/drugs/vagifem-pessaries/

That is comparable to what I was prescribed when I was post partum with my older son and my interest in sex returned before my body's tolerance for it returned.

[SparklyUnicorn]

To be fair, this isn't a female thing. Men have been bearing the brunt of meds to increase their sex life for years and years. Plus ads to increase their size, stamina, etc. 

 

Besides Viagra, like what?

 

The other ads strike me as quacky stuff.  The same quacky stuff they probably have for women.

[Scarlett]

I had no idea so many women lose their drive. 😥

 

I am 51 and post menapause and notice no decrease except I do feel exhausted more often...sometimes I would prefer sleep but am happy if I stay awake.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I had no idea so many women lose their drive. 😥

 

I am 51 and post menapause and notice no decrease except I do feel exhausted more often...sometimes I would prefer sleep but am happy if I stay awake.

 

huh...I am amazed by hearing the opposite.  I wish I knew the secret.

[ktgrok]

Besides Viagra, like what?

 

The other ads strike me as quacky stuff.  The same quacky stuff they probably have for women.

 

Well I think there are several brands of Viagra type stuff now, and the ads have been running for a long time. So this isn't a woman only thing, the idea of encouraging or facilitating sex in older couples. 

[Scarlett]

huh...I am amazed by hearing the opposite. I wish I knew the secret.

I took a very very low hormone dose for 5 years to get me through menapause. I am talking I took half of the lowest dose. My doctor couldn't belive it helped my symptoms at all. But I weaned off of that even about 18 months ago.

[UncleEJ]

I wish someone would invent a pill that would DECREASE a man's desire. (LOL)

I would SO sneak that in DH's food! We are mismatched, to say the least.

[ktgrok]

I had no idea so many women lose their drive. 😥

 

I am 51 and post menapause and notice no decrease except I do feel exhausted more often...sometimes I would prefer sleep but am happy if I stay awake.

 

I don't know that I'm surprised, but I am surprised that women are okay with it, or don't want to try to change it. I recently went through a period of nonexistant drive, and it really bothered me that I didn't want it anymore. Enough to go to the doctor and bring it up, which was a bit uncomfortable. Partly because I remember I DID enjoy it, so it made sense to try to get that back. But also because I felt that if the situation was reversed I would want my DH to try his hardest to get his drive back. 

 

Mind you, I don't think someone should feel obligated to have Tea if they don't want it, but I felt a bit obligated to make sure there wasn't an easy fix that would make me want it again. 

[Danestress]

I had no idea so many women lose their drive. 😥

 

I am 51 and post menapause and notice no decrease except I do feel exhausted more often...sometimes I would prefer sleep but am happy if I stay awake.

I agree. This is a depressing thread! I suspect I am older that a lot of you, and definitely not all about drinkng tea daily. But there are things in life that are (to me) about pleasure. Food. Wine. Sex. Poetry. Music. Conversation with a best friend, a difficult hike and the luxuriating in just being there ... a dog. Most of these things require energy and I don't do them on command. But if I stop enjoying them at all, I would want to work in 'fixng' that. I assume that pleasure is what you have left as an old person if you are lucky. I hope to at least enjoy my food and music when I am in my dotage, and if I still have a man, I greatly hope to still want him now and then. Edited June 10, 2016 by Danestress

[PrincessMommy]

I would SO sneak that in DH's food! We are mismatched, to say the least.

 

me too - on both statements. 

[Guest]

my understanding is that's a wink wink nudge nudge euphemism for vaginal atrophy.

 

The people who buy these products aren't actually having sex, they're trying to treat chronic pain, but we can't say "vaginal atrophy" in this society or even admit that it exists so we say "better sex" to sell these products for the same reasons pre-menopausal women say "teA" or "do the deed" or other euphemisms for our euphemism for chronic genital pain.

 

If you needed it, the health warnings and the snickering premenopausal women who think you're buying it because you're promiscuous wouldn't bother you. If those things bother you, then you aren't in enough pain to need it.

Edited June 10, 2016 by Guest

[Tammi K]

 I'm 52, I wish it would stop already...but that's a different subject. :)

 

I'm 54 and wishing the very same wish.  The one time in my life I get to be an overachiever...... :closedeyes:

 

[HRAAB]

I had no idea so many women lose their drive. 😥

 

I am 51 and post menapause and notice no decrease except I do feel exhausted more often...sometimes I would prefer sleep but am happy if I stay awake.

This. I took low dose hrt for a couple of years to help with night sweats and sleep issues. I'm beginning to suspect that I had a high sex drive, although I didn't know it at the time since I had no way to compare. While it has decreased some, largely due to not sleeping, it is still pretty healthy. Dryness is an issue but we deal with it. Dh is patient. Actually in some ways, I enjoy sex more now than pre menapause since there is no worry about an unexpected pregnancy. A sort of freedom I didn't entirely feel before. I hope to enjoy sex for quite a few more years. Dh and I have always been pretty well matched in that regard.

[The Girls' Mom]

I don't feel obligated to fix it.  For one, I'm relatively healthy.  Blood work all checks out a-ok.  I'm not going to take a pill for something that is probably my body's natural progression.  All the things function properly, and there are no physical issues.  It is enjoyable when it happens.  It is just that I'd rather do just about anything else.

 

I'm married to a man that lives in constant pain.  His drive isn't that great either.  And he pays a price when it does happen.  So, really, I'm not all gung-ho to get it revved up.  

 

Our marriage just isn't one that the bedroom plays a large role in.  I'm really, really, ok with that.  

 

Edited June 10, 2016 by The Girls' Mom

[SparklyUnicorn]

I don't know that I'm surprised, but I am surprised that women are okay with it, or don't want to try to change it. I recently went through a period of nonexistant drive, and it really bothered me that I didn't want it anymore. Enough to go to the doctor and bring it up, which was a bit uncomfortable. Partly because I remember I DID enjoy it, so it made sense to try to get that back. But also because I felt that if the situation was reversed I would want my DH to try his hardest to get his drive back. 

 

Mind you, I don't think someone should feel obligated to have Tea if they don't want it, but I felt a bit obligated to make sure there wasn't an easy fix that would make me want it again. 

 

Ok, but could they do anything about it?  That's the thing.  When I've told people this, they told me to tell a doctor. When I've told a doctor, they pretty much blew me off and said there is nothing that can be done.  So what was the point of that?  Even some of the "advice" given here in the past has been really strange stuff.  Like just do it and the more you do it the more you'll want to do it.  Yeah sure....  Does.not.work.

[Scarlett]

Ok, but could they do anything about it? That's the thing. When I've told people this, they told me to tell a doctor. When I've told a doctor, they pretty much blew me off and said there is nothing that can be done. So what was the point of that? Even some of the "advice" given here in the past has been really strange stuff. Like just do it and the more you do it the more you'll want to do it. Yeah sure.... Does.not.work.

That works for me....the more I do it the more I want to....lol...but I don't have a low drive to start with so really I am sorry. I wouldn't want to take a pill for that either.

[Soror]

I think if drives are matched and nobody cares to increase it then there isn't any issue. 

 

BUT I don't see anything wrong with wanting to increase your drive. I think it is about time women's wants were taken into consideration. I think it is far more insulting to say it doesn't matter if we want it or not. I appreciate the fact that women are now seen as sexual beings too.  Men have had this for years, I'd guess it make some of them feel put on the spot too. 

 

I've had a decade plus of my drive being often low due to hormones from bf'ing now that I've past that point in my life I'd like a chance to be normal. My husband keeps commenting that he thinks I'm fertile but as I keep telling him it is normal to want to have s*x more than one time a month. I can't wait until menopause has passed and we can have s*x without threat of pregnancy- I'll be really disappointed if I finally get there and don't want it at all. 

 

So, if you think the commercials don't apply to you and you are happy with the way things are then just ignore them. BUT I'm happy there are options out there in case I need them. I'd also say there is a whole lot that plays into sex drive. It isn't just hormones. As I said I noticed a difference in mine with an increase in my thyroid meds. A full hormone and thyroid panel is not something that a dr is going to run unless you ask for it(even then they don't often know how to treat it). My general health is outstanding but my endocrine system has a good bit of trouble a traditional dr would see my picture perfect cholesterol, BP and weight and think things are just fine but they aren't. I'm not about giving up, not yet anyway, too many years of life left to live it half-way.

[ktgrok]

Ok, but could they do anything about it?  That's the thing.  When I've told people this, they told me to tell a doctor. When I've told a doctor, they pretty much blew me off and said there is nothing that can be done.  So what was the point of that?  Even some of the "advice" given here in the past has been really strange stuff.  Like just do it and the more you do it the more you'll want to do it.  Yeah sure....  Does.not.work.

 

Oh, my doctor was very attentive to the issue. And proactive. I brought it up and he said it could be my IUD, and he could take that out and see. Or could be hormone levels or other issues. I had good lab work otherwise, so he tested my DHEA and Testosterone, and was willing to do a testosterone cream prescription or even an injection right there and then, even before we had results. He went over the pros and cons of the various options, and we settled on a lesser alternative due to me trying to conceive and testosterone not being a good thing to be on with that. Plus we knew I'd be getting the IUD out which might impact it. So DHEA supplements were the start, with the plan to call and request the testosterone if I wanted it. If that hadn't worked we'd have kept looking. 

 

So yeah, he was very willing to listen and didn't blow me off at all. 

[PrincessMommy]

I agree. This is a depressing thread! I suspect I am older that a lot of you, and definitely not all about drinkng tea daily. But there are things in life that are (to me) about pleasure. Food. Wine. Sex. Poetry. Music. Conversation with a best friend, a difficult hike and the luxuriating in just being there ... a dog. Most of these things require energy and I don't do them on command. But if I stop enjoying them at all, I would want to work in 'fixng' that. I assume that pleasure is what you have left as an old person if you are lucky. I hope to at least enjoy my food and music when I am in my dotage, and if I still have a man, I greatly hope to still want him now and then.

 

I feel just the opposite.  Its so refreshing to know I'm not the only one who feels this way and wishes society would stop loading expectations about what is "normal". 

 

It's like an introvert finally being told it's perfectly okay to want to stay home alone and read books on a Friday night.

[SparklyUnicorn]

Oh, my doctor was very attentive to the issue. And proactive. I brought it up and he said it could be my IUD, and he could take that out and see. Or could be hormone levels or other issues. I had good lab work otherwise, so he tested my DHEA and Testosterone, and was willing to do a testosterone cream prescription or even an injection right there and then, even before we had results. He went over the pros and cons of the various options, and we settled on a lesser alternative due to me trying to conceive and testosterone not being a good thing to be on with that. Plus we knew I'd be getting the IUD out which might impact it. So DHEA supplements were the start, with the plan to call and request the testosterone if I wanted it. If that hadn't worked we'd have kept looking. 

 

So yeah, he was very willing to listen and didn't blow me off at all. 

 

I've been fixed so no IUDs or anything.

I'm not willing to take hormone anything.  I know, I'm not being 100% cooperative here, but I don't want cancer either.  Low sex drive seems way less annoying than cancer. 

 

My doctor didn't suggest anything and said testosterone is dangerous (I do agree with that part).  I know others will disagree, but mmm nope, not going that route.