Jump to content

Menu

If you farted quietly in a yoga class, would you


Laura Corin
 Share

  

224 members have voted

  1. 1. Would the fart mean that you would

    • Never go to the class ever ever ever again
      9
    • Be a bit nervous the next week but get over it and carry on attending
      66
    • Feel a bit embarrassed on the day but wouldn't think about it the next week
      84
    • Dismiss it from your mind and carry on as normal
      58
    • Other
      7


Recommended Posts

I don't take yoga classes but I do play tennis.  As someone with food allergies and celiac disease I have frequent gas; gas that cannot always be controlled. Sometimes, when I would overreach for a ball or have to really run to get a difficult shot, farts would fall out.  There was nothing I could do.  I would try to squeeze the glutes but to no avail.  I would purposely make my shoes squeak (rubbing them on the court) or pretend to cough when I felt a rumbly tummy.   After a particularly noisy set, my opponent was missing shots due to laughter.  She called out over the net "I don't now which is funnier - your gas or the fact that you think you can cover it up."

 

All of the tennis regulars knew about it.  I was the only one embarrassed by it.  We still play.  I still fart.  It's not all that quiet.

  • Like 18
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Unless she realized that she who smelt it, dealt it. The thing to do is wait for her to say something or wrinkle her nose, and then look around like you just noticed the stench yourself.

Have you ever been riding in a car through the countryside when a foul scent permeates the car? The culprit may be the dump truck in front of you, or the nearby freshly-fertilized pastures, but there's always that impulse the announce to the other occupants, "That wasn't me!"

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't take yoga classes but I do play tennis. As someone with food allergies and celiac disease I have frequent gas; gas that cannot always be controlled. Sometimes, when I would overreach for a ball or have to really run to get a difficult shot, farts would fall out. There was nothing I could do. I would try to squeeze the glutes but to no avail. I would purposely make my shoes squeak (rubbing them on the court) or pretend to cough when I felt a rumbly tummy. After a particularly noisy set, my opponent was missing shots due to laughter. She called out over the net "I don't now which is funnier - your gas or the fact that you think you can cover it up."

 

All of the tennis regulars knew about it. I was the only one embarrassed by it. We still play. I still fart. It's not all that quiet.

Lol!!!! I'm dying!!!

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My initial instinct would be total mortification and never return to that establishment again.

 

This would be followed by my usual pragmatism of "these things happen" and I would go back. While attending class the following week I would be wondering who remembered that I passed gas the previous week and be inwardly mortified.

 

This exactly. 

 

Though unfortunately, after two babies, when I cough, it's not usually a little tinkle that escapes  :blush:  My yoga is always done at home, with a video!

Edited by ILiveInFlipFlops
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ok, I may have misvoted. I voted that I would be embarrassed that day but I wouldn't think about it next week. HOWEVER, I still remember with extreme embarrassment the time in 8th grade gym class when I farted during situps. 

 

It's a basic bodily function, and it probably shows that the yoga move was truly releasing all your stress ;)

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't take yoga classes but I do play tennis.  As someone with food allergies and celiac disease I have frequent gas; gas that cannot always be controlled. Sometimes, when I would overreach for a ball or have to really run to get a difficult shot, farts would fall out.  There was nothing I could do.  I would try to squeeze the glutes but to no avail.  I would purposely make my shoes squeak (rubbing them on the court) or pretend to cough when I felt a rumbly tummy.   After a particularly noisy set, my opponent was missing shots due to laughter.  She called out over the net "I don't now which is funnier - your gas or the fact that you think you can cover it up."

 

All of the tennis regulars knew about it.  I was the only one embarrassed by it.  We still play.  I still fart.  It's not all that quiet.

 

You just need to develop your best "Serena Williams grunt" to cover it up!  :laugh:  They everyone will think you are trying even harder!!  Who knows?  You could start winning on intimidation alone.

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

HOWEVER, I still remember with extreme embarrassment the time in 8th grade gym class when I farted during situps. 

 

Ha!  Just the other day, DH & I were telling our girls about the "joy" of physical fitness tests in middle/high school... and about how there was ALWAYS someone who passed gas during sit-ups.  

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't take yoga classes but I do play tennis.  As someone with food allergies and celiac disease I have frequent gas; gas that cannot always be controlled. Sometimes, when I would overreach for a ball or have to really run to get a difficult shot, farts would fall out.  There was nothing I could do.  I would try to squeeze the glutes but to no avail.  I would purposely make my shoes squeak (rubbing them on the court) or pretend to cough when I felt a rumbly tummy.   After a particularly noisy set, my opponent was missing shots due to laughter.  She called out over the net "I don't now which is funnier - your gas or the fact that you think you can cover it up."

 

All of the tennis regulars knew about it.  I was the only one embarrassed by it.  We still play.  I still fart.  It's not all that quiet.

 

At least you have a good excuse! The rest of us may not do it as often, so it's got the surprise factor. ;)  Martial arts is another great place for farting. The kicking and punching drills seem to have built-in release mechanisms for the bowels.  :laugh:

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I voted that I would be embarrassed that day but I wouldn't think about it next week. HOWEVER, I still remember with extreme embarrassment the time in 8th grade gym class when I farted during situps.

 

Me too.  I pretended my shoes were squeaking, LOL.  But you know, 8th graders are nuts.  Hormones.  It's funny how I remember with embarrassment stuff that happened 35-40 years ago, but if I did the same thing today I'd just blow it off.  (No pun intended.)

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd change my name, move to another continent & erase my online presence. 

 

jk! 


Was this a Bikram class by any chance? Bikram & other hot yoga are kind of notorious for that. And apparently the dripping sweat in the crack provides an auditory amplification.  :scared:  I almost got a groupon for a local studio but when I checked the reviews it was all about how farty the room was. 

 

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, just for fun, I will add a little anecdote, though not about yoga.

 

School child who shall remain nameless farted loudly while getting her back cracked adjusted by the chiropractor.  She then proceeded to laugh, which made her fart, which made her roll and laugh, which made her fart.  After the 3rd fart she was politely encouraged to go to the restroom, but not before the other chiro looked in the door to see what was happening.  Most likely the entire building was aware.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Was this a Bikram class by any chance? Bikram & other hot yoga are kind of notorious for that. And apparently the dripping sweat in the crack provides an auditory amplification. :scared: I almost got a groupon for a local studio but when I checked the reviews it was all about how farty the room was.

 

 

No, Ashtanga. I get faint in heat, so no hot yoga for me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Feel a bit embarrassed on the day because not everyone was raised with brothers, so they're probably more sensitive to bodily function noises and odors. 

I have 3 older brothers and grew up on a farm.  I got over bodily function noises and odors a looooong time ago.

One of my brothers can belch most of the alphabet after drinking a liter of soda. Same brother has lit his farts on fire while camping with buddies and still brags about it. When they were all in the same vehicle and he was driving, he'd hit the button that made the driver the only one in control of the windows and he'd turn off the AC so they could "enjoy" some of his "best work" all the more. 

Former homeschooler and homeschooling dad, Tim Hawkins, has written a parody to "Dust in the Wind" called, Someone Broke Wind.

Edited by Homeschool Mom in AZ
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Um I teach yoga and someone lets one rip almost every class. Why do you think yoga instructors use essential oils and burn incense? 😂😂😂

Don't think twice about it. Go back to class. No one else is thinking about it. Trust me. Much worse happens that a silent but deadly fart.

I work at a yoga studio and go to class regularly. It's a common occurrence, don't sweat it!!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

 

(It didn't like all my quotes, ignore this box)

 

 

I'm laughing so hard I'm crying, it's 1230am, and my 17 year old is playing an online game beside me.  His teammates are asking who is snorting and laughing in the background....I can't breathe well enough to tell my son he won't understand.

 

My daughter had the WORST farts I've ever smelled (and I do have 4 sons!!!) when she was about 7 to 14.  We were driving in a very remote area of Alaska, at night, -50°F outside, and my daughter let one rip.  I couldn't pull over because there wasn't anywhere to do it.  I couldn't open the windows because we would literally freeze to death.  My eyes were watering, breathing through my shirt didn't help....  

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My daughter had the WORST farts I've ever smelled (and I do have 4 sons!!!) when she was about 7 to 14.

 

Males and females don't actually have any difference in frequency and smelliness of farts. Particularly smelly farts are usually that way because of diet, or sometimes due to health issues.

 

On that note, OP, if you fart in yoga class again, tell everybody that smelling stinky farts can be good for your health. I don't even care if that's true, from now on, that's my go-to line!

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Males and females don't actually have any difference in frequency and smelliness of farts. Particularly smelly farts are usually that way because of diet, or sometimes due to health issues.

 

On that note, OP, if you fart in yoga class again, tell everybody that smelling stinky farts can be good for your health. I don't even care if that's true, from now on, that's my go-to line!

 

Girls usually aren't as "obvious" about farts as boys, boys seem to revel in them.  My daughter, though, is more like a boy/man in that respect  :laugh: she just lets them rip.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I grew up in a family where farting and poop were not talked about or acknowledged. I find these bodily functions humiliating. I would not be able to go back. I think I'm extreme and there's nothing I can do about it. 

ETA: I am raising my kids to be ok with their normal body functions. Some of this was a little facetious. 

Edited by ebrindam
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

On that note, OP, if you fart in yoga class again, tell everybody that smelling stinky farts can be good for your health. I don't even care if that's true, from now on, that's my go-to line!

 

I knew a kid who said she liked the smell of farts.

 

Perhaps that's why she liked hanging around at our house (I had 3 brothers and a farty dog).

 

Personally I don't think farts are funny or pleasant.  I try very hard not to fart (except in the bathroom).  I won't even do it if I'm completely alone.  Once (and only once) I accidentally farted in front of a friend, and she told my siblings about it.  To this day - 35 years later - I have not lived it down.  And I never will.  It will probably be mentioned in the "memories" part of my funeral.

 

ETA I know I admitted to farting in gym class too, but I totally denied that and it wasn't in front of a friend, so that doesn't count.  :P

Edited by SKL
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I grew up in a family where farting and poop were not talking about or acknowledged. I find these bodily functions humiliating. I would not be able to go back. I think I'm extreme and there's nothing I can do about it. 

ETA: I am raising my kids to be ok with their normal body functions. Some of this was a little facetious. 

 

I did too *sigh* I;m still trying to break some of those old thought processes. Seriously, it's only been in the past few years that I've been able to even say the "F word" out loud! Thankfully, DH is one of three brothers and has no such issues :lol: And my kids are more relaxed about it too. 

 

Of course it would be just my luck that I'd end up with a chronic digestive issue in middle age, right? That's helped break down a few barriers for me as well. For better or for worse...

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

At church we have a woman (late 80s) who comes in late to women's mtg every Sunday.  After everyone is seated & quiet, she makes her way up the aisle passing gas with every step.  The room is divided between those who are trying madly to keep in the giggles & those who are mortified for her.  Either she doesn't notice or doesn't care.

 

Last year while performing in a musical my dd was in the wings waiting to go onstage, she & the other ladies were to go out on stage singing & walk up a flight of four stairs and turn to the audience & sing "ahhhhhhhh!"  The woman directly in front of my daughter turned to her and said,

 

"I am so sorry, but being nervous gives me gas."

 

Sure enough,  she walked out on stage and we could clearly hear with each stair step:

 

"Toot, toot, toot, toot, Ahhhhhhh!"

 

It was hilarious.

 

Amber in SJ

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Previous post made me LOL!

 

 

My MIL is a farter.  In the 16 years that I have been married to her son, there has not been a single visit that I've not heard her pass gas.  Granted, she is an older woman, as well as overweight with stomach issues -- the perfect storm.  Quite often it's just little "toots" as she stands up and walks past someone....but it's ALWAYS followed by a surprised "Oh! Pardon ME!"  It cracks me up b/c she MUST know by now that it's coming.  Her response is funnier than the actual thing.   :lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...