Would you buy a house that a suicide had ocurred in?

[gardenmom5]

I've had several houses around me sell - and only ONE potential buyer ever ask me any questions about one of those homes.  (I was already outside doing yard work.)

 

the fact you have lost three potential sales because of one neighbor - indicates the neighbor is going out of their way to inform buyers.  sounds like the neighbor was very disturbed by it, and they would make me want to live somewhere else.  that said - there are people who are superstitious about manner of death.  I would imagine that would vary by geographic and local culture area.

 

 

[EmseB]

If for no other reason, I think it should be disclosed because it's a significant event that happened in the home, and if I find it out through neighborhood gossip, it makes me wonder why the seller didn't want to disclose it if it happened while they owned the house. Are they selling because of the event? If so, why? Why don't they want to tell me about it? If it's a deal breaker and they don't tell me, I feel conned. If it's not a deal breaker, the seller doesn't know that.

 

If it was several owners back, that would be different. If it just happened and that's why the people are moving out and what ultimately led to the sale...it It just seems shady not to tell people and have them find out later. For some people it is a deal breaker (superstitious or whatever), so they should know up front.

Edited May 14, 2016 by JodiSue

[Mimm]

Yep, I'm with the people who say that the suicide wouldn't bother me but the nosy, annoying, gossipy neighbor is a deal breaker.

[Happy]

I'm also curious if it has to do with age and manner of suicide? For example, if it was an elderly person that took pills with no blood or violence involved, would you feel the same?

I wonder about this as well. If the young person had died of a drug overdose (self inflicted or not) would it feel different? I believe it would for me.

 

I helped some folks buy a house where the seller disclosed her husband had died of cancer in the home. Not something that normally is discussed or disclosed. My buyers thought it meant lots of love in the home and went forward with the sale.

 

In my opinion, not disclosing--even if it's legal not to--leaves you open to the gossipy neighbors, either before the sale or a year later. It's better to disclose first.

 

I actually like the idea of a spiritual cleaning....I'd probably do that in various forms before I moved in.  

[ondreeuh]

Interesting. The consensus seemed to change overnight. ;). We are well within our rights to not disclose it (Lanny) and we ARE disclosing everything we are required to such as an oil tank on the property. Everyone gets a home inspection to discover issues that even we don't know about.

 

I know our realtor has been asked why we are selling ( especially since we have 2 houses side by side) and the true reason is that we have decided not to move back to that state. The suicide didn't affect our decision, just affected the timing.

[gardenmom5]

 

 

My POINT is that the neighbor's had to live through something pretty awful and that might make them not-too-welcoming at first so that might make me nervous. The busybody neighbor would put me off.

the neighbor did NOT live through something pretty awful.  this was not the neighbor's home or family.  they were not a witness, and would have had no direct part in the aftermath -except  what they would have sought out because - voyeur.   I doubt the neighbor associated with the teen - but the neighbor has given some signs of living voyeuristically through other families in the neighborhood.

I remember a couple neighbors like that when I was growing up. they sought out neighborhood gossip, the more salacious the better - and I had zero respect for them.  

 

I  have more sympathy for my father's best friend than I do that neighbor!  (and I was speechless when his wife said how broken up he'd been . . . uh, I'm not the one to try and get sympathy about how upset your dh was about my father's suicide.  even if it has been 35 years.)

 

 

I wonder why the neighbor wants to tank their own property value? The more your house can sell for, the more theirs is worth. That's weird.

lower property taxes?

 

I wonder about this as well. If the young person had died of a drug overdose (self inflicted or not) would it feel different? I believe it would for me.

 

My father OD'd - my mother owned the house for another 18 years before she sold it - and it never even occurred to any of us to disclosed it.

[Laurie4b]

I agree with other posters that if you want to sell the house, disclose the suicide whether you are required to or not. Because of the neighbor, people can't buy and live there happily ever after without finding out anyway. Disclosing up front weeds out the people who would back out because of the suicide and leaves you with the niche of people who wouldn't care. After it's rented for a while, the impact of the suicide will probably decrease some. 

 

I know of a case in a state in which disclosure wasn't required. An out of state buyer purchased a property where a tragedy had occurred and then didn't want to live in the house once finding out. Buyer could not sell at the price paid to local people who did know about tragedy. A civil suit was successful. 

[plansrme]

It would not bother me one whit. Nor would I disclose it--I think you would look silly doing so. I also would consider prosecuting the neighbor for trespassing. Unless he is leaning over the fence yelling at potential buyers, he is on your property without permission. I can't imagine being dissuaded from buying a house because of a death of any sort unless there were blood stains on the carpet or something. What, exactly, would be the problem? Ghosts? (And I don't not believe in ghosts--I think there may be some out there because I don't know everything. But I would still buy the house!)

[Laurie4b]

For those of you that think this needs to be disclosed - why? (And I'm not disagreeing, just trying to understand other perspectives.). Why do you, personally, feel it should be disclosed? Ghosts? Demons? One poster said as much, so I understand her perspective. Are you worried about media coverage or teens breaking in later to ghost hunt, or ... What exactly is the impairment? Where does it stop, if it's a feeling that negative events need to be disclosed? Should divorces be disclosed? DV? Natural deaths? Illness? Just curious here.

 

 

 

It's enough of an issue to many people that many states require disclosure of things of that nature. 

 

It doesn't have to be a logical reaction; just a creeped out feeling. You don't want that feeling in your own home. 

[marbel]

For those of you that think this needs to be disclosed - why?

 

<snip>

 

I think it should be disclosed simply because the neighbor is going to disclose it anyway.    I'd rather know about it upfront than hear it from a nosy neighbor.

 

But I get that the OP is within her legal rights not to, so she should do what she thinks best. 

 

[Lady Florida.]

It wouldn't bother me, but I'm not in the least bit superstitious. The nosy neighbor OTOH would really annoy me. Is there any way the realtor could talk with her? I don't know why she'd even do that. If I was the neighbor I'd rather have people living in a house next to me than have an empty house that could end up being a party house, or at the at the least an invitation to vandalism..

[hornblower]

would you guys also want to know that a house had had a home birth? 

 

 

I've slept in beds where people had died.

In the past, people who were ill often got a push from a bit too much laudanum. Sort of what I think of as their assisted suicide.  Why should any of it matter? People live, people die. 

[Callie]

We bought a home that had a hanging in it many years before.  It was not a deal breaker for us.  

 

I wonder if it is the gossipy neighbor that is turning off prospective buyers not because of the story that she is telling, but the fact that she seems very intent on making a private story known to all.  I would absolutely reconsider buying a home if the neighbors were obnoxiously overinvolved prior to purchase. 

This was my first thought.  Busybody gossipy neighbor, not the suicide.

[Bluegoat]

It would not put me off at all.

 

Maybe the neighbour didn't like the look of the people who were going to buy it?  When the house next door was up for sale, dh and I always joked that if we didn't like the look of the people viewing we would do something really abnoxious like send all the kids out to be loud.  (Of course we would never really do that, unless maybe it was obviously an organized crime syndicate or something.)

[SquirrellyMama]

Do you know who the low balling investor is? Could it be the nosy neighbor who is screwing up your deals, or a friend of the nosy neighbor?

 

Kelly

[snowbeltmom]

This was my first thought.  Busybody gossipy neighbor, not the suicide.

 

This was my first thought as well.  The suicide wouldn't bother me, but that neighbor sure would.  Who would want to live by someone who would gossip about such a private family tragedy?

 

I would consider having the realtor speak to the neighbor and tell her that the seller has said that legal action will be taken against the neighbor if she doesn't stop speaking with potential buyers and interfering with the sale of the house.  While I wouldn't follow through and sue, maybe the threat of a lawsuit would silence the busybody.

 

[ktgrok]

I'm also curious if it has to do with age and manner of suicide? For example, if it was an elderly person that took pills with no blood or violence involved, would you feel the same?

 

no, I'd probably be okay with that. But kid who shot himself in the head? No, I couldn't live there. I don't believe in ghosts or anything like that, but would just be too weirded out and too sad. And a tiny part of me would be worried about "bad juju" or something like that. I just wouldn't like it. 

 

In fact, when we were home shopping one house had a bad "vibe" and we didn't buy it because of that. There were locks on the outside of the bedroom doors, as if locking small children in, and it just felt awful. Like a dark shadow was over the house. 

Edited May 14, 2016 by ktgrok

[ktgrok]

would you guys also want to know that a house had had a home birth? 

 

 

I've slept in beds where people had died.

 

In the past, people who were ill often got a push from a bit too much laudanum. Sort of what I think of as their assisted suicide.  Why should any of it matter? People live, people die. 

 

Murder is different than grandma slipping away peacefully surrounded by family . Child shooting himself is different than a homebirth. Life and death is one thing, violence is another. It's the violence, not the death, that would bug me. 

[MyLittleBears]

I'm thinking the neighbor will disclose no matter what. It may even add more of a taboo factor if she is told not to do it. You want to preempt her and disclose. Hearing it from you vs. hearing it from a nosy neighbor could make a big difference in a buyer's confidence you, the seller. I know it would to me.

 

Good luck OP! I hope it works out well for you!

[TammyS]

 For some people it is a deal breaker (superstitious or whatever), so they should know up front.

 

If it's a deal breaker, they should ask.  Seriously.  There is nothing at all about the house itself that is affected.  If it is seriously THAT important to them that certain historical issues of a house would be a deal breaker, they should ask about them. 

[TranquilMind]

I did buy one, though of course, no one told me until a neighbor shared it years later.  One of the kids had committed suicide in the home.

 

We lived there many years.

Someone has died everywhere you stand and walk and sit, sometime in history.   I think it is silly not to buy a house because someone died. 

[MysteryJen]

We just bought a house after a 6 month search. We were looking at older houses (so lots of stuff may have happened, we didn't know...) and after a while, houses had feeling. Some felt comfortable, newer or redone ones were pretty neutral, but there were a couple that just felt wrong. Like it was full of despair and arguments...just wrong.

The neighbor might be annoying, but we always talked to the neighbors if they were getting their mail or doing yard work. There is a lot that realtors may not disclose or talk about.

For me, upfront disclosure would be appreciated. Finding out later would make me upset at everyone involved in the transaction.

[TranquilMind]

no, I'd probably be okay with that. But kid who shot himself in the head? No, I couldn't live there. I don't believe in ghosts or anything like that, but would just be too weirded out and too sad. And a tiny part of me would be worried about "bad juju" or something like that. I just wouldn't like it. 

 

In fact, when we were home shopping one house had a bad "vibe" and we didn't buy it because of that. There were locks on the outside of the bedroom doors, as if locking small children in, and it just felt awful. Like a dark shadow was over the house. 

 

I would trust your gut totally on the second one.  If it doesn't feel right, it isn't right.

But the first, I'm curious as to why?  Someone killed himself, but so?  Someone else may have died there that you don't even know about, or maybe many someones over the decades or centuries.  Why does that bother you? 

 

[Outdoorsy Type]

I almost bought a house with a recent suicide, and I'm glad my offer was outbid. In retrospect, I would have a hard time not thinking of the sorrow and grief that was in the house. Some people can hear a sad or disturbing story and get past it. Some people don't want to think about and/or be reminded of that story every day. It also might be harder for those who are struggling with depression to be reminded that sometimes depression wins. 😢

[Granny_Weatherwax]

TMI:

 

Our second home was the scene of a suicide.  We were not told about it prior to purchase but an informative neighbor told us the grisly details about as we were moving in.  A woman had hung herself from one of the bedroom closet rods.  Once we learned about it we asked the realtor about disclosure; it wasn't required if the incident occurred more than 5 years before the sale. It had been more than 5 years so we were not told.  In the interim the house had been used as a long term rental. The house was dated and rundown, inside and out. We think the sellers waited until the statute of limitations had passed before selling.

 

Once I knew about the suicide my thoughts about the house changed.  It gave me a creepy feeling, especially at night.  All three bedroom closets had those floor to ceiling sliding mirror doors and the reflections, whether a tree branch blowing in the breeze or the lights of a passing car, would make me jump. I expected ghostly images to appear - thanks to reading too many ghost stories in my youth. We changed the doors as quickly as we could which made my nights more comfortable but I never enjoyed opening the closets.  We never found out which bedroom closet was the site and I did fret a bit about it possibly being in one of the children's rooms.  Especially when, one day, all of the fish in DD's fish tank died - all of them - the snail, the sucker, the neon tetras, etc.   And DD, who had never had sleeping problems, began having nightmares.  We had our pastor come and bless the house.

 

I know it sounds dorky but that's what happened.  We lived there less than a year before DH took an out-of-state job and we sold the house.  I don't know how long we would have lived there had we stayed in that city.  The people who bought it from us are still there and have continued to remodel and update.  They love the house.  In case you're wondering, no, we didn't tell them.  Our realtor advised us against it.

[heartlikealion]

It would be upsetting to me. Even if I had the house blessed I would just think about it a lot and that would interrupt my mood in my new home.

[TravelingChris]

For my dh and me, I do't think it would make a difference.  However, we have two children who are depressives and I don't think it would be good for them.  

[Granny_Weatherwax]

We just bought a house after a 6 month search. We were looking at older houses (so lots of stuff may have happened, we didn't know...) and after a while, houses had feeling. Some felt comfortable, newer or redone ones were pretty neutral, but there were a couple that just felt wrong. Like it was full of despair and arguments...just wrong.

<snip>

 

I get feelings from houses too.

 

---

I also want to add that a family friend bought a suicide house in our current town.  They picked it up for $8000 and completely remodeled it.  They now have a nice house in a decent neighborhood for pennies on the dollar.  It has never bothered them and they smile at their equity.

[G5052]

Yes, I recently sold a deceased relative's house where we had to disclose if owner-of-record or anyone living there with the owner-of-record had died in the house, and if they had, what the circumstances were. In his case, he never married and died in the ICU only a few days after being admitted, but we still had to disclose that and even provide a death certificate.

 

None of the other real estate sales I've ever been involved with have ever required that. Both the realtor and the bank trust officer there commented that some people won't even consider a house where someone was in a hospice situation. 

 

Frankly it wouldn't bother me.

[Peaceful Isle]

We rented a house that someone died in, and here I guess they have to disclose.

 

I would totally buy a house that had that happen in it. I don't believe in the spooks so I'm good. :)

[heartlikealion]

I think there's a difference between simply "died in" a la natural causes and "killed here" or "a suicide took place here."

 

I probably wouldn't be too keen on any of the above, but I would be more likely to move into a home where someone peacefully passed away. Especially if while touring the home I felt no "icky" vibes.

Edited May 14, 2016 by heartlikealion

[shawthorne44]

Not only would I, but I tried to buy a house that had.   The sellers were under the impression that they had to disclose for 2 years and they were selling just after.  But, it was three houses down from my childhood home where my parents still live.  So, I knew anyway.   I offered market rate, but the husband didn't like the idea of a single woman affording HIS house.  

[SKL]

I don't think it would bother me.

[Carol in Cal.]

Regarding the gardening, what we do is put in the rental agreement explicitly that the tenant is responsible to maintain the yards.

 

If we see that they are not doing so, we send them a letter saying that we have made sure that the yards are pretty low maintenance, but we understand that they may not have time to care for them.  We mention what we have observed, objectively--ex. 'There are tall weeds in 3 of the 4 planting areas and the grass is overly tall', and that they have a choice at this point--they can assume responsibility for the yards, or we will hire a gardener expect them to add $XXX to their rent payments for that expense.  We make it clear that we are subsidizing the gardener at that rate.  Then we say, Please let us know what you want to do.  If we don't hear from you by XX/XX, we will assume that you want us to hire the gardener, and that you will add XXX to the rent starting XX/XX.

 

This has worked extremely well for us, partly because we rent a little below market to start with so they already know they are getting a good deal. 

 

I've noticed that some landlords locally are just advertising:  'Includes gardener' in their listings.  For some this is a selling point.

Edited May 14, 2016 by Carol in Cal.

[ondreeuh]

If it's a deal breaker, they should ask.  Seriously.  There is nothing at all about the house itself that is affected.  If it is seriously THAT important to them that certain historical issues of a house would be a deal breaker, they should ask about them. 

 

This is what I think too. "I am only interested in houses that are on at least a half acre, fenced yard, no HOA, public sewer, and no known deaths or violence in the house." Every house has a history. Most of us leave that history in the past and just move forward.

 

We rented a house for 2 years before we bought our current house. Any time we met a new neighbor, they mentioned quirks about the previous tenants -  I think they were just making conversation (and maybe checking to see if we were nutty too). The only thing that bothered us was evidence that WAS left behind (cat poop and hay! It seems they bred cats?).

[ondreeuh]

I get feelings from houses too.

 

---

I also want to add that a family friend bought a suicide house in our current town.  They picked it up for $8000 and completely remodeled it.  They now have a nice house in a decent neighborhood for pennies on the dollar.  It has never bothered them and they smile at their equity.

 

Sounds like it was a good situation for the buyer, but certainly not for the seller!

 

We are hoping to smile at our equity. We lived in one house and bought the one next door 10 years ago when it went up for sale because the two lots together comprise a HUGE parcel in an expensive city. We have always thought we would be able to sell both of our houses together (hopefully to a developer). This was part of our long-term investment plan and it was on track until this suicide. It peeves me that just the knowledge that a suicide took place is enough to severely impact our investment. As if it hasn't done enough damage to the family that went through it.

 

[OnMyOwn]

I do not think I would buy a home under those circumstances. I can see where there are many people who could completely shove it out of their minds and be fine with it. But, I know that every time I walked into the room where it occurred, I would think about it and feel sad/distressed.

[OnMyOwn]

Sounds like it was a good situation for the buyer, but certainly not for the seller!

 

We are hoping to smile at our equity. We lived in one house and bought the one next door 10 years ago when it went up for sale because the two lots together comprise a HUGE parcel in an expensive city. We have always thought we would be able to sell both of our houses together (hopefully to a developer). This was part of our long-term investment plan and it was on track until this suicide. It peeves me that just the knowledge that a suicide took place is enough to severely impact our investment. As if it hasn't done enough damage to the family that went through it.

 

Yeah, that would be upsetting. I would not be happy about it either and it's the kind of thing you'd never imagine would even happen, or what the impact would be. And it's not your fault and there's nothing you could have done to prevent it. I hope it works out well for you and that you find the right buyer. Edited May 14, 2016 by OnMyOwn

[TammyS]

Yes, I recently sold a deceased relative's house where we had to disclose if owner-of-record or anyone living there with the owner-of-record had died in the house, and if they had, what the circumstances were. In his case, he never married and died in the ICU only a few days after being admitted, but we still had to disclose that and even provide a death certificate.

 

None of the other real estate sales I've ever been involved with have ever required that. Both the realtor and the bank trust officer there commented that some people won't even consider a house where someone was in a hospice situation. 

 

Frankly it wouldn't bother me.

 

I'm confused.  Did he die in the house or in the ICU?  Are you saying that you had to disclose that someone who once lived in the house eventually died, not even in the house?

[momacacia]

Lawyer up.

 

I would see if I could get a letter from a lawyer to your neighbor who is potentially subject to a lawsuit from you for intentional inference with contract. They could be in deep for what they've done.

[TammyS]

This is what I think too. "I am only interested in houses that are on at least a half acre, fenced yard, no HOA, public sewer, and no known deaths or violence in the house." Every house has a history. Most of us leave that history in the past and just move forward.

 

We rented a house for 2 years before we bought our current house. Any time we met a new neighbor, they mentioned quirks about the previous tenants -  I think they were just making conversation (and maybe checking to see if we were nutty too). The only thing that bothered us was evidence that WAS left behind (cat poop and hay! It seems they bred cats?).

 

As a child I lived in a (rental) that had a murder/suicide before we moved in. Even as a kid I didn't find it a problem.  Just a weirdness. 

 

I do think the neighbor could be a problem.  When I was looking for a house several years ago I did a drive-by of a place that I found online and stopped to take a look (the house was empty).  While I was walking around the house the neighbor came over and started talking to me and telling me alllllll about the house and alllll about the previous owner and was allllllll in her business.  This was a GUY!  I left there knowing that I would never ask for a showing of that house, because he and I would have....not gotten on, as they say.

[momacacia]

Dp

Edited May 14, 2016 by momacacia

[Farrar]

I live in a century old house in an urban neighborhood that has seen some interesting times. If some crazy stuff didn't go down in this house at some point, I'd be shocked. I feel like some of the sentiments about the house go with the whole "I don't want to live in a used house" mentality.

 

Of course, the neighbor does sound like a piece of work. If I was on the fence, the whole situation might turn me off.

 

This thread was actually really interesting to read.

[KungFuPanda]

Another thought is that even if the parents don't mind, they might have little kids that would get creeped out or scared. If the neighbor is determined to tell everyone, the kids would find out. As a buyer, I'd rather make the choice myself and not be informed after the purchase. You're not legally required to, but enough people feel strongly about it (and in a way that's completely different from an old lady passing in her home) that it seems like disclosing is the decent thing to do.

[Farrar]

I wonder if disclosing it calmly and matter of factly, along with the information about the professional cleaning, might get ahead of the neighbor and be a better option anyway.

[gardenmom5]

Another thought is that even if the parents don't mind, they might have little kids that would get creeped out or scared. If the neighbor is determined to tell everyone, the kids would find out. As a buyer, I'd rather make the choice myself and not be informed after the purchase. You're not legally required to, but enough people feel strongly about it (and in a way that's completely different from an old lady passing in her home) that it seems like disclosing is the decent thing to do.

 

who's going to tell the little  kids?  the parents?  probably not.  busybody neighbor?  maybe, but little kids generally steer clear of busybody neighbors because busybody neighbors are often of the school children should be neither seen NOR heard.

[HRAAB]

The nosey neighbor would bother me far more than the fact there was a suicide in the house.

[Guest]

I think if I were considering buying the house and the owner or agent said, "...but I also just want you to know, a suicide occurred in the home. There is no physical evidence of the act and it had no impact on the structure of the home." I would be sitting there going, "...And?" I would be confused as to why it was even being mentioned. It could even introduce doubts in the mind of someone who doesn't otherwise care; i.e., "hmmm. I mean, it's a sad thing, but it doesn't affect the house...am I some odd, callous person who does not care? Maybe I should care. Maybe normal people want a price reduction to off-set the creep factor. Maybe we should say we care and want a price reduction..."

[MedicMom]

I did CPR on the former resident of my house, on the floor of what is now my kid's playroom. It was my bedroom before that.

It didn't bother me. I obviously knew before we bought the house. Still doesn't bother me. there are no ghosts in this house.

 

The house I grew up in is another story. I am convinced it is haunted and I am usually a very rational person. It wasn't until I was an adult we found out there was a suicide there.

[BigMamaBird]

I found out the wife of the man we bought our home from died in the dining room.  It's sad but I'm not creeped out by it.  People have to die somewhere and it's not unusual to assume that many houses have had deaths.