Bragging....Just to counterbalance

[fairfarmhand]

In another one of my threads, someone mentioned that they'd never seen me post good things about my oldest.

 

She's a challenging kid. I generally post when I'm at my wits end with her. So I need to rectify it.

 

She's turned around quite a bit in the last year or so. She's actually a very decent person and I like her most of the time. We still have emotional days, but nowhere near as explosive as they used to be. Time and maturity has knocked some of the rough edges off of her personality. I"m constantly in awe that the child who drove me to the brink of my sanity has become the lovely young woman that she is today.

 

She's made straight As through her Jr. and Sr. Year. This is with a course of Honors/AP classes. She's worked very hard with the virtual school and her test scores were amazing.

 

Consequently. she has a mostly full ride to college. YAY!

 

We laugh a lot together. We have similar senses of humor and we enjoy stuff like Studio C and Dr. Who together.

 

She's started teaching piano lessons to a few kids from our homeschool group.

 

She's on salary working hard at the real estate office. Loves her job and she's good at it.

 

She's saved up most of her money and will be paying cash for a gently used car in the next few weeks.

 

She works hard in our drama group along with the other kids. I really think that this group that I teach has gone a long way toward turning our relationship around. We both have to be nice :) while there, it's a project that we both enjoy and we're good at. She can see me as a parent who can have plenty of fun. And we laugh all the way home after each rehearsal.

 

She has a boyfriend who I really like. They've both handled themselves very maturely with regards to their relationship. He's so respectful of me and most adults and that attitude rubs off on her. When she thinks I'm being unreasonable and arguing about a curfew or some other arrangements, he simply says, "Yes Ma'am I'll do whatever you want." And that's good for her to see. Also, they are very careful about their relationship and how far it can go; they both have goals and college in mind and know that they have to take their relationship slowly to reach those goals. They both have so much common sense about this. It makes me proud.

 

So moms of challenging kids, take heart. There is hope!

 

(BTW, read The Explosive Child. This book helped SO much!)

[fairfarmhand]

Also, she's scored so well on AP tests that she's got more than a semesters worth of college credit going into her freshman year.

[JumpyTheFrog]

I'm so glad there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Edited May 3, 2016 by HoppyTheToad

[Miss Mousie]

What a beautiful post, FFH!  I'm so glad you shared all of that good stuff.  And wow, BIG congratulations to your daughter for all of her successes!

 

:hurray:

[Anne in CA]

I also have a challenging oldest. She hasn't turned her life around THAT well yet, and she's 27, but she has come a long way in the last couple of years. It IS hard to want to vent someplace safe, but not sound negative. I am happy for you!

[AK_Mom4]

That's wonderful!!!! Congratulations!!!

 

My challenging oldest went slightly off the deep end in high school. Urrrk! I cried and cried.

 

Since then, he has turned himself around 180 degrees. Got himself accepted and then graduated from the Air Force academy. We just got home from attending his graduation from pilot training and he is off to fly airplanes. I miss him terribly.

Edited May 3, 2016 by AK_Mom4

[mamiof5]

That's wonderful!!! Sounds like she has many good things going on.

[catz]

:hurray: :001_wub:

[Lilaclady]

Great job to you both. Wishing her all good success going forward. Thanks for sharing

[trulycrabby]

She sounds like a wonderful young lady! Congratulations! :hurray:

[purplejackmama]

This is such good news for my weary heart.

[Ottakee]

That is great

[Ausmumof3]

Way to go!

 

One of my good friends growing up was probably a challenging eldest but grew into an amazing successful and empathetic person. The strength of character that can make kids difficult can make adults amazing!

[Tsuga]

When I read about your daughter it really reminds me so much of mine. This truly warms my heart and brings tears to my eyes. Thank you so much for sharing.

[Guest]

I have a kid so similar to how you've described her over the years and this warms my heart and gives me hope. She sounds like an excellent young lady and it's not luck that brought that out of her :)

[creekland]

One of my good friends growing up was probably a challenging eldest but grew into an amazing successful and empathetic person. The strength of character that can make kids difficult can make adults amazing!

 

:iagree:  Kudos to all who make it through those challenging years as parents whether the kids end up "great," "ok," or not.  It's still a really tough job as a parent and so much of which category they end up in afterward depends up them.  If it were us (parents), then they'd all be terrific.  Unfortunately, many won't listen to parents, so when "great" doesn't happen one can't blame themselves (as long as they tried).

 

Sharing ideas and success stories can help others glean ideas.  Venting helps too.

 

All that said, I love success stories.  My challenging boy (likely inherited traits from me) is maturing nicely as he goes through college.  Fortunately, we didn't kill him in his youth.   :lol:  We might be able to blame some gray hairs on him though.

[rocassie]

:hurray:  :hurray:  :hurray:   That is great that she has been doing so wonderfully, and your relationship is in a much better place.  I think I might just check out that book you read.  I've had another friend recommend it to me for my oldest.

[Minerva]

:hurray: Awww...Such a nice post and so encouraging for those of us with challenging kids who are younger.