Homeschooled children and anxiety...linked?

[muttmomma]

My son is staying to see a new therapist. This is for depression and anxiety.

 

During one first session she said that she had seen quite a bit of homesvhooled children, and all for general anxiety.

 

Made me wonder what about the homeschooling experience, or lack of traditional schooling experiences might contribute to anxiety.

 

What do you think?

[TeenagerMom]

I think it very much depends on the child.  It's a correlation doesn't equal causation thing.  Kids with anxiety may be homeschooled more than public schooled BECAUSE of the anxiety. I don't think lack of traditional school would contribute to it.

[happi duck]

I'm guessing that some kids with anxiety get pulled out of public school to be homeschooled.

 

Looking back, I think anxiety played a role in our decision to hs.

 

However, DC know a lot of conventionally schooled kids with anxiety.

[Guest]

Potshot at homescholing.

 

What do her public schooled patients come in for?

 

(Also a little bit, if you spend all day every day with someone youre more likely to notice when they need help? Maybe?)

 

And lord have mercy if ps doesnt inspire anxiety in a significant proportion of students, I dont know what does. That is the topic of like 80% of teen novels.

[Lucy the Valiant]

Quite the opposite also exists - kids who are refreshingly free from anxiety, most probably because they were home schooled.

 

(Not denying the other end, of course.)

[HSmomof2]

No, I don't agree at all that homeschooled kids have more anxiety than kids in any type of school environment. I've had anxiety off and on throughout my life, and I went to public schools. (And, no, school didn't cause my anxiety either. 😊)

[HS Mom in NC]

If that's true and you're not a troll (don't take it personally, we have dealt with plenty of trolls here who start conversations by claiming concern that some criticism of homeschooling might be legitimate then go on argue about it) then you have to remember that not all homeschooled kids were homeschooled the whole time.  Often they're pulled out of ps due to medical issues so they can keep their academics while receiving treatment or because institutional settings can exacerbate problems. 

One of my 3 has anxiety and depression and she's the first homeschooled kid her therapist has treated.  My husband, his sister, his father and his paternal grandmother were all treated for anxiety and depression and they were all public schooled. I have no idea what the depression and anxiety rates are among the homeschooled population but someone would need to know that and the actual rate of depression and anxiety among traditionally schooled students then they would have to isolate and account for different factors before they could make any scientifically based conclusion about the absence of traditional schooling causing it.

 

When I told the ped and ped neurologist that someone suggested my middle daughter's migraines were somehow related to being homeschooled they laughed.  It had to do with the fact that her neck curved the wrong way (forward instead of backward) and that was putting pressure on her nerves and her sharp hormonal fluctuations caused by good stress. Since there's some evidence that migraines run in families and my husband, my FIL, my husband's paternal grandmother, my maternal grandmother, my mother and I all have a history of migraines (and traditional school, by the way) it's believed to be another contributing factor.  "If you could choose your parents, would you?" the ped jokingly asked my daughter, because of the family history.  The ped neurologist didn't have any other hs patients and the ped has a whole lot of hs kids as patients and ps kids as patients and he claims it's the ps kids who are having increasing rates of stress triggered migraines, but he didn't say any type of schooling was the cause of migraines for any particular groups of kids.

Edited April 9, 2016 by Homeschool Mom in AZ

[waa510]

Hm. Well. I'm not sure I'd continue to see a therapist who didn't understand the very basic Psych 101 concept of 'correlation does not equal causation.' I think that kids who have anxiety are more likely to find the environment of school more stressful and difficult to deal with....which may lead parents to choose homeschooling. However, I know plenty of people who have anxious kids in school. I'd be wary of a therapist trying to connect dots like that.

 

I can see a very high-stakes academic environment whether home or not to be an aggravator of already-there anxiety, though.  

[gardenmom5]

I think it's more likley anxious children are more likely to be homeschooled as opposed to homeschooling making children anxious.

 

AND/OR - homeschooling parents are more likely to be aware their children are anxious and seek help for them.

[school17777]

I use a hybrid program through our school district (can do a mix of classes at home and at school). I speak to a lot of people interested in learning more info about the program. So far, ALL of the people I have spoken to about the program over the past three years who have children already going to school have some anxiety issues that the parents believe may be helped by reducing the amount of time the children are at school. So, the anxiety was there BEFORE they looked at bringing their children home. (The families that I have spoken to about the program who either were traditional homeschooling or haven't started any schooling yet, anxiety did not even play a role in their consideration of the program.)

[Guest]

Quite the opposite also exists - kids who are refreshingly free from anxiety, most probably because they were home schooled.

 

(Not denying the other end, of course.)

That's been our experience. Refreshingly secure and comfortable, healthy kids on the whole. Even among the special needs and challenging crowd they're still doing better than they were in traditional school. It's not the best fit for every kid and there are always exceptions, but my own experience and homeschool community is more success stories than not by a large margin. Anxiety is less than what I see in the local schools, or at least better managed. Some of that is correlated with the demographics of the families, of course :)

[Pawz4me]

I think it's more likley anxious children are more likely to be homeschooled as opposed to homeschooling making children anxious.

 

AND/OR - homeschooling parents are more likely to be aware their children are anxious and seek help for them.

 

This would be my guess also.

 

Our story -- We had always planned to do something other than public middle school, and homeschooling was at the top of our list of other options.  Our elementary school was excellent, so we had no initial qualms about sending the boys there.  But oldest DS had an absolutely horrible fourth grade teacher who triggered tremendous school related anxiety (he was in the academically/intellectually gifted program, so his anxiety wasn't due to academics).  So we decided to go ahead and start homeschooling after he completed fourth grade rather than wait until middle school.

 

Youngest DS completed first grade at the same elementary school and we gave him the option of beginning to homeschool or continuing at the public school.  He chose homeschooling.

 

Oldest DS's anxiety was immediately cured by getting away from the horrible teacher, and he chose to return to public school for high school.  He's had not one sign of abnormal anxiety since then.

 

Youngest DS entered an early college high school program through our local school system and community college.  He has since been diagnosed with anxiety by both his pediatrician and the psychiatrist he was referred to.

 

So . . . .did homeschooling cure oldest DS's anxiety, and did returning to a public school environment cause youngest DS's anxiety?  No, I don't really think so in either case.  I think oldest would have been fine if he'd returned to public school in fifth grade.  I believe his anxiety was due to very specific circumstances (horrible teacher) and chances are very high he would have gotten a teacher he found a LOT less stressful had he continued on at school.

 

Did returning to a public school setting cause youngest DS to develop anxiety?  No, I don't think so.  I think the tendency was always there.  Homeschooling protected him, but it isn't the type of protection that can continue for life, of course.  Something would have triggered it eventually.

[creekland]

Plenty of kids with anxiety at our school see a counselor at the school.  Are they counted among her stats if she's not within the school system there?

 

Many kids with severe anxiety drop out of ps and opt for cyber or homeschooling.  They were not homeschooled from the beginning.  Does this mean ps causes anxiety?  (Rhetorical question with the simple answer being no - the more complex answer is it sometimes contributes.)

[PeterPan]

Like the others, I get weary of practitioners who blame things on homeschooling.  Yes, there are higher percentages of SN in the hs community than in the general population.  If school was going so well for the dc, why would he be pulled out?  Lots of SN in the hs community.  And further, hsers tend to be very proactive about getting care.  Good point that in the ps they would have access to services.  Many states are not allowing hsers access to ps services EVEN THOUGH WE PAY TAXES JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so we have to go private.  

 

I'd drop a polite hint that if she doesn't feel like she can work with him objectively you can find another therapist.   ;)  Don't doubt these people.  They'll drop hints that you are the problem, that homeschooling is the problem, don't you want to be in such and such other setting...  If she's like that in front of you, what's she doing when you're not there?  

Edited April 9, 2016 by OhElizabeth

[marbel]

Plenty of kids with anxiety at our school see a counselor at the school.  Are they counted among her stats if she's not within the school system there?

 

<snip>

 

This is what I was thinking. I'd guess that parents using the public school system are staying within the system to get help for their anxious kids. 

 

I'd look for a different therapist, or at least ask outright if she can be objective about your child given her bias against homeschooling.

 

Edited April 9, 2016 by marbel

[poppy]

Hm. Well. I'm not sure I'd continue to see a therapist who didn't understand the very basic Psych 101 concept of 'correlation does not equal causation.' I think that kids who have anxiety are more likely to find the environment of school more stressful and difficult to deal with....which may lead parents to choose homeschooling. However, I know plenty of people who have anxious kids in school. I'd be wary of a therapist trying to connect dots like that.

 

I can see a very high-stakes academic environment whether home or not to be an aggravator of already-there anxiety, though.  

 

To be fair, the therapist just said she saw a lot of homeschool kids (probably to put the OP's mind at ease about her familiarity with the concept.) It is the OP who is asking if there is a correlation.

 

I am pulling my daughter from public school due to anxiety.  Anxiety isn't caused by school, but it does make it a rough experience.

 

I have seen the stats that say that the rates of special needs in public school vs homeschool kids are about equal, but I'm skeptical of that.  So many kids are pulled for being square pegs or for having a rough time emotionally at school. As someone with one NT, resilient kid and one who is neither ......... while "special needs" is a loaded term (aren't all kids special, anyway?), I will tell you, the things that shattered my daughter at school wouldn't have even been noticed by my son.

 

[Mimm]

To be fair, the therapist just said she saw a lot of homeschool kids (probably to put the OP's mind at ease about her familiarity with the concept.) It is the OP who is asking if there is a correlation.

 

I am pulling my daughter from public school due to anxiety.  Anxiety isn't caused by school, but it does make it a rough experience.

 

I have seen the stats that say that the rates of special needs in public school vs homeschool kids are about equal, but I'm skeptical of that.  So many kids are pulled for being square pegs or for having a rough time emotionally at school. As someone with one NT, resilient kid and one who is neither ......... while "special needs" is a loaded term (aren't all kids special, anyway?), I will tell you, the things that shattered my daughter at school wouldn't have even been noticed by my son.

 

 

I can imagine the number of special needs in a public school being about equal to the homeschool population. After all the schools sometimes offer things difficult to get outside of the school system. My nephew receives speech therapy that would be completely outside my sister's ability to pay through his school. Just one example. :)

[Dmmetler]

One thing I've noticed is that self-identifying secular homeschoolers locally almost all have a child who qualifies for a label. I'm the first contact for ahomeschool group, and the most common question I get is "my DC has X label, will he fit in?"-and I can almost always respond "Yes, you'll be in good company, because we have four other families with kids close to your DC's age who are dealing with the same thing!". And often the second question is "Is there a good doctor/dentist/therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist for kids with X label?". And most of these parents (myself among them) would never have homeschooled if we had a neurotypical child who could be well served within the school system.

 

So yes, I could see a therapist having a higher than average number of homeschooled kids with anxiety, because if they're a good fit for one homeschooled kid with anxiety, it's likely the parents have let others know who have kids who need similar supports.

Edited April 9, 2016 by dmmetler

[poppy]

I can imagine the number of special needs in a public school being about equal to the homeschool population. After all the schools sometimes offer things difficult to get outside of the school system. My nephew receives speech therapy that would be completely outside my sister's ability to pay through his school. Just one example. :)

 

I get what you are saying, but to be clear about this... in most cases, kids are eligible to receive those exact services while homeschooling.  It is a federally protected right (as recognized in some, but  not all, states).

Details here: http://www.hslda.org/strugglinglearner/sn_states.asp#MA

[KungFuPanda]

It's starting to feel like EVERY teen and early twenty-something has anxiety. What gives lately? I'm sure the counselor sees MANY more schooled kids with anxiety but has latched onto this pet theory of hers.

[Crimson Wife]

I studied biological psychology in my first degree and there is evidence that many teens with substance abuse problems are self-medicating for anxiety. It is my suspicion that the underlying neurobiological imbalance is more likely to manifest as anxiety in HS adolescents and substance abuse in adolescents who attend traditional schools. HS parents tend to keep a closer eye on their kids than many (though certainly not all) PS parents do.

 

It's mind-boggling to me how many PS parents are willing to leave their teens home unsupervised for the weekend. Might as well go ahead and buy the teen alcohol and pot for the party that you KNOW that he/she is going to have.

[SparklyUnicorn]

I studied biological psychology in my first degree and there is evidence that many teens with substance abuse problems are self-medicating for anxiety. It is my suspicion that the underlying neurobiological imbalance is more likely to manifest as anxiety in HS adolescents and substance abuse in adolescents who attend traditional schools. HS parents tend to keep a closer eye on their kids than many (though certainly not all) PS parents do.

 

It's mind-boggling to me how many PS parents are willing to leave their teens home unsupervised for the weekend. Might as well go ahead and buy the teen alcohol and pot for the party that you KNOW that he/she is going to have.

 

I don't know about that.  My parents left me a few times.  I did not drink and I have never smoked pot.  And really if a teen is heck bent on doing either one of those things, they don't need to wait until their parents leave town. 

[SparklyUnicorn]

To the original question, I don't see why homeschooling would cause more anxiety.  Anecdotal evidence is also not scientific evidence. 

[sassenach]

I think my family is a great example of nature over nurture. I have 2 kids with anxiety. 1 homeschooled for 4 years, another for his entire school life so far. Then I have another kid, always homeschooled, who is SUPER social and not afraid of a damn thing in life. All 3 have always been who they are, pretty much since the day they were born. My non anxious kid is also the only one who never went to preschool. So could you say preschool causes anxiety? I don't think so. I think it's just natural wiring. Dh has anxiety, too; I do not. I say it's all about the genetics. Where life choices come in is do they support the development of healthy coping mechanisms, or do they exacerbate the struggles? I would say that homeschooling can play a very healthy role if part of a bigger plan to support the child (which is exactly what you appear to be doing).

[SparklyUnicorn]

See this seems so counter intuitive to me.  My kids' lives are a TON less stressful than if they had to go to a brick and mortar school.  They have a lot more free time.  I am not a hard @$$ when it comes to school work.  How on earth would that be more stressful?  I suppose if our home life was not good that might be one reason. 

[TranquilMind]

My son is staying to see a new therapist. This is for depression and anxiety.

 

During one first session she said that she had seen quite a bit of homesvhooled children, and all for general anxiety.

 

Made me wonder what about the homeschooling experience, or lack of traditional schooling experiences might contribute to anxiety.

 

What do you think?

Totally personality of the child. 

 

Schooling experience is entirely irrelevant, in my view.  What could be relevant is if Mom hovers too much or does more for the child than the child would be expected to do in school (especially for older kids/teens).  This I don't know, but I don't rule it out.

 

I know that I have one fearless and bold child who moved overseas alone and another who doesn't really ever like to be alone and would never do this.  Same parents. 

[TranquilMind]

See this seems so counter intuitive to me.  My kids' lives are a TON less stressful than if they had to go to a brick and mortar school.  They have a lot more free time.  I am not a hard @$$ when it comes to school work.  How on earth would that be more stressful?  I suppose if our home life was not good that might be one reason. 

 

Exactly.  Sleeping in.  Eating whenever you want.  Going to the bathroom whenever you want.  What's not to love? 

 

(Caveat, in a low stress, financially comfortable, 2 parent home - mileage could vary, of course).

 

[texasmama]

I started homeschooling due to one child's anxiety.  So I think the therapist is looking at the cause and effect incorrectly.

 

No, I don't think that homeschooling causes anxiety. Yes, I think there is a higher percentage of homeschooled kids with mental health diagnoses, which is why they are homeschooled.

[TranquilMind]

I studied biological psychology in my first degree and there is evidence that many teens with substance abuse problems are self-medicating for anxiety. It is my suspicion that the underlying neurobiological imbalance is more likely to manifest as anxiety in HS adolescents and substance abuse in adolescents who attend traditional schools. HS parents tend to keep a closer eye on their kids than many (though certainly not all) PS parents do.

 

It's mind-boggling to me how many PS parents are willing to leave their teens home unsupervised for the weekend. Might as well go ahead and buy the teen alcohol and pot for the party that you KNOW that he/she is going to have.

 

This is definitely kid-sensitive.  We left one of mine alone for days once because it had to be done for the health of another family member.  This one was just fine.  No alcohol, no visitors, no party (verified by next door neighbors!).   Just internet and TV and studying. 

 

This one would never touch substances with a ten foot pole. 

[TranquilMind]

I don't know about that.  My parents left me a few times.  I did not drink and I have never smoked pot.  And really if a teen is heck bent on doing either one of those things, they don't need to wait until their parents leave town. 

 

That's for darn sure.

 

Mine left me too, many times, especially in the late teens.  All I did was watch TV late and not let anyone know I was alone. 

 

[TranquilMind]

I think it's more likley anxious children are more likely to be homeschooled as opposed to homeschooling making children anxious.

 

AND/OR - homeschooling parents are more likely to be aware their children are anxious and seek help for them.

 

You know, I still wonder what is making all of these kids so anxious today?  What the heck is going on?  I wonder if they aren't doctoring up the food supply or something.  But then, I'm not a very trusting person. 

 

I went to school back in the dark ages and every other kid didn't have some label.  Something is going on, and I don't believe that it is merely that multitudes of people always had problems but didn't get labeled back then.  

 

Inquiring minds want to know.  This has bothered me for years. 

[Pawz4me]

I studied biological psychology in my first degree and there is evidence that many teens with substance abuse problems are self-medicating for anxiety. It is my suspicion that the underlying neurobiological imbalance is more likely to manifest as anxiety in HS adolescents and substance abuse in adolescents who attend traditional schools. HS parents tend to keep a closer eye on their kids than many (though certainly not all) PS parents do.

 

It's mind-boggling to me how many PS parents are willing to leave their teens home unsupervised for the weekend. Might as well go ahead and buy the teen alcohol and pot for the party that you KNOW that he/she is going to have.

 

My parents left me alone regularly for a week at a time starting when I was 16. They were traveling for business.  I loved it, and never once was I tempted to use the unsupervised time for alcohol, drugs or partying.  I was in heaven having the house to myself!  The last thing on earth I would have wanted to do was have a party.

Edited April 9, 2016 by Pawz4me

[BarbecueMom]

When I was a (public schooled, but free-range-ish) kid, I had a junior dictionary. Shiny white pages with a few black-and-white pictures among the definitions.

 

One day when I was about six or seven, I accidentally flipped to the back. In the back were various tables and pronunciation charts, with a bright blue border around the page. I completely panicked, slammed the book closed. I remember my heart racing, my throat closing off, and being very upset - pretty much my first anxiety attack. I couldn't look at that dictionary for years afterward, because it was so uncomfortable, that feeling that I looked in on something I wasn't meant to see, along with a vague hint that I was being completely unreasonable.

 

My oldest can sometimes be like this. Sometimes I worry that homeschooling is like handing him that dictionary instead of photocopied worksheets. Someday, in curiosity, he'll turn to those blue pages and instead of learning something new and opening up a world (like my middle son would), he'll freak out and put that book on a shelf for years.

[Crimson Wife]

So obviously I must be overgeneralizing from my high school experience, which was that the teens who were left unsupervised were the ones hosting wild parties (that I did not attend since I had strict parents who would actually check up on my whereabouts).

[HS Mom in NC]

I should point out that there are homeschooling situations that do cause stress but those are rare exceptions.  The nut jobs who use homeschooling to cover up abuse (that does happen every now and then) and the occasional "hot mess" homeschooling parents who are bundles of chaos and the rare cult member homeschoolers are causing stress by homeschooling.   There are kids in the world for whom school is a refuge from severe family stress and those homeschooled kids would have less stress in their lives if they were schooled outside the home by someone reasonable and competent.  I don't think there's a realistic solution to that problem and that discussion would derail the thread anyway, but I wanted to acknowledge that homeschooling is a contributing factor to stress in a very small minority of situations. 

 

Edited April 9, 2016 by Homeschool Mom in AZ

[SparklyUnicorn]

I should point out that there are homeschooling situations that do cause stress but those are rare exceptions.  The nut jobs who use homeschooling to cover us abuse (that does happen every now and then) and the occasional "hot mess" homeschooling parents who are bundles of chaos and the rare cult member homeschoolers are causing stress by homeschooling.   There are kids in the world for whom school is a refuge from severe family stress and those homeschooled kids would have less stress in their lives if they were schooled outside the home by someone reasonable and competent.  I don't think there's a realistic solution to that problem and that discussion would derail the thread anyway, but I wanted to acknowledge that homeschooling is a contributing factor to stress in a very small minority of situations. 

 

 

 

Yeah I can imagine this being stressful, but what is it with people and their crazy generalizations? (rhetorical)

[BlsdMama]

My son is staying to see a new therapist. This is for depression and anxiety.

 

During one first session she said that she had seen quite a bit of homesvhooled children, and all for general anxiety.

 

Made me wonder what about the homeschooling experience, or lack of traditional schooling experiences might contribute to anxiety.

 

What do you think?

 

I'm spit-balling.

Homeschooled kids tend to have researching, verbal, over-thinking mothers with whom they spend a lot of time.  Correlation?

[heartlikealion]

I agree with correlation not causation.

 

Also, if you're homeschooling your child you might be more likely to see (or see sooner) signs of anxiety and have more availability to take them to appointments which ordinarily probably occur during school hours. I mean even if the parent didn't have to miss work to take the child to an appt., the child would have to disrupt their school day maybe more so than a homeschool day.

 

I have anxiety and I went to public school. I don't think school was the root of my anxiety, though. It's actually more linked to my OCD.

[StephanieZ]

There are lots of reasons for this correlation . . . several good ones mentioned above.

 

Another one might be moms like me, whose own anxiety contributed to my decision to homeschool. "Mood disorders" which includes both anxiety and depression can run in families. 

 

That inheritable trait could be an issue for my kids whether or not my kids were homeschooled. 

[6packofun]

It's starting to feel like EVERY teen and early twenty-something has anxiety. What gives lately? I'm sure the counselor sees MANY more schooled kids with anxiety but has latched onto this pet theory of hers.

 

I understand what you mean and ALSO feel as if many more things that are just a difficult part of being a teen/young adult are seen as anxiety, as something to be medicated or subjected to therapy.  I feel like our society sees any discomfort or confusion about life or the self as BAD, when many times--not all, of course--it's just part of growing into the person you will become.  And we are ALL "becoming" something...why is it bad that it's hard sometimes??

 

And I say this as a mom with a young adult who recently asked me if he could go see the dr. about his anxiety.  Anxiety and depression also run in my family AND dh's!  So it would have been surprising if none of our six had escaped this particular stressor in their lives.  This is ours, other people have different ones.  Because human.  lol  We are very involved in trying different ways to relieve it and also counsel them about being OK with not feeling perfect at times.

[creekland]

So obviously I must be overgeneralizing from my high school experience, which was that the teens who were left unsupervised were the ones hosting wild parties (that I did not attend since I had strict parents who would actually check up on my whereabouts).

 

Definitely overgeneralizing in pretty much the same way as the stereotypical college student is out partying every weekend.  I have three who went to college and opted out of the party scene.  Two were homeschooled in high school and one chose to go to ps.  The ps guy is at the biggest party school of the three and still chooses not to make it part of his life.  He has friends who choose similarly.

 

It's all about the kid...

 

It may be partially genetic.  Neither hubby nor I cared for the party scene in high school or college either.  We still don't.

 

Idk. I think a lot of anxiety existed back when I was a teen, and it was generally untreated. 

 

As a pp said, this lead to self-medicating, mostly through alcohol and self harm. This was back in the 80's, so not recent. 

 

It seems to me that the same levels exist now, but we have somewhat better rates of acknowledgement and treatment. 

 

:iagree:  I think it was always around in the same numbers.  There was just more of a stigma associated with it, so families kept it hush hush and forced those affected to just deal with it.  That often led down dark paths.  It still does when that happens.

[gardenmom5]

You know, I still wonder what is making all of these kids so anxious today?  What the heck is going on?  I wonder if they aren't doctoring up the food supply or something.  But then, I'm not a very trusting person. 

 

I went to school back in the dark ages and every other kid didn't have some label.  Something is going on, and I don't believe that it is merely that multitudes of people always had problems but didn't get labeled back then.  

 

Inquiring minds want to know.  This has bothered me for years. 

 

a lot of things were ignored back in the day.

 

I had enough issues going on - today,  child-me would have been diagnosed with aspergers and anxiety.  instead - I was left to flounder with little help.  what help I did receive - was akin to a band-aid when I needed the equivalent of  stitches, a cast, and physical therapy.

 

there have also been dietary requirement changes.  I recently had a study come across about how boys need 3X's the essential fatty acids as girls for the development of the corpus callosum . . . . . (I'm taking a time out while I fume.)  our modern dietary requirements continue to demonize all fatty acids.  the corpus callosum is what enables the left and right hemispheres of the brain to communicate (and why girls generally develop faster in this area.).  that directly affects reading, writing, balance, cognitive function, socialization, etc.  etc.

also - kids generally spend less time outside playing, climbing, etc.  bilateral activities (bike, swim, MA, gym, yoga, horse,)  also help to develop the corpus callosum.

[Julie Smith]

 

 

It's mind-boggling to me how many PS parents are willing to leave their teens home unsupervised for the weekend. Might as well go ahead and buy the teen alcohol and pot for the party that you KNOW that he/she is going to have.

 

I was left home alone on the weekends. 

 

I had friends over and we ate chips, drank pop and played board games. I think a friend made chocolate cupcakes. 

 

Party On!

[Paige]

We pulled for anxiety related reasons. They were definitely present before homeschooling and making PS difficult. If we'd had no issues like that, we likely would have never homeschooled.

[muttmomma]

Wow. Hot tppic. First off--- I'm not a troll!

This new therapist just mentioned it off hand as if the thought struck her as wdiscussed the fact that he had always been homeschooled.

I don't think she was planning blame, per se, but has just seen the correlation.

 

I actually liked her. We were going to learn coping techniques for stress, mindfulness etc.

[heartlikealion]

I would suspect teens of parties, but I wouldn't assume they are definitely taking place. I'd be way more likely to stay out all night than to invite people over to my parents' house where I'd have to clean up after them and explain the beer stains or whatever. But that's just me.

[texasmama]

I was almost never left alone as a teen.  I had to sneak around and lie and leave the house to go drink and party.  The one time I was left alone for a weekend at 17 while the rest of the family went to a wedding out of town,  I went to work and church and did homework.

[LMD]

We totally had parties when parents were away... Just about every weekend there was a house party or two. That was how we spent year 11 & 12, school, part time job, party! Not much sleep though. Amazingly, we didn't get up to anything too crazy and all graduated with decent marks, we were otherwise good kids and most of our parents didn't really care.

[creekland]

I was left home alone on the weekends. 

 

I had friends over and we ate chips, drank pop and played board games. I think a friend made chocolate cupcakes. 

 

Party On!

 

I want to party at your house!!!

 

We still eat chips (or pizza or pretzels) and play board games when getting together with friends.  I love it.  Occasionally we swap the soda or water for wine though.

[SKL]

I don't think there's one or two reasons for the correlation.  There are probably several at least.

 

I am not a homeschooler, but I know one person who homeschools a daughter with anxiety.  I don't remember if that was the reason she told me they hs.  I know she has at least one other issue going on health-wise.  But I could totally understand pulling a child with severe anxiety out of public school.  So that would be causation the other way, in some cases.

 

I think if the psych has a bunch of homeschoolers coming to her for anxiety, she is being recommended by homeschoolers to other homeschoolers.  So that would skew things.

 

I also think (as one poster mentioned) that as anxiety runs in bio families, there could be a correlation between parents being anxious about sending their kids to school and kids having anxiety.

 

I think homeschooling families may have more time to address issues via counseling.  I am looking into counseling for my kid (who is not homeschooled), and the question of fitting it into our schedule is about to give *me* anxiety.

 

I also hear the question of why so many kids have a diagnosis or "need" treatment etc.  Yes, kids have always had really difficult feelings, especially once hormones kicked in.  Yes, it was usually ignored.  Would it have been better to "treat" these natural processes?  I am not sure.  Since these things are a natural part of development, there may be some benefit to living through them without prescribed "help," except in extreme cases.