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In desperate need of prayer for mentally ill college student.

dirty ethel rackham

By dirty ethel rackham,
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dirty ethel rackham

K did agree to let me take them to see their old therapist in the city. We'll be leaving shortly. She might be able to convince K to enter the program.   Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

dirty ethel rackham

A huge THANK YOU  to all of you for your prayers and support.  We are by no means out of the woods, but a few positive things took place at the therapist's office.  Communication lines were opened and

dirty ethel rackham

Just thought I'd update here about K's situation.  K came home last Thursday evening.  They are pretty traumatized and basically want to escape.  Unbeknownst to us, they had planned to go stay with a

Denisemomof4

Denisemomof4 675

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I am so sorry to hear all that your family is going through. Does he have a diagnosis? It's really difficult in the beginning stages of diagnosis and treatment. Until K is stable on the right meds, the roller coaster of ups and downs will continue. Once he is on the right meds you will all find more peace. Of course adjustments may still be needed, but the right meds will bring stability back to your entire family.

 

My close friend is extremely religious and her oldest child, born a girl and now 24, is now a boy. During the transitioning stages and coming out, this poor person was distraught, depressed and suicidal. She is an atheist through and through. Just a few months ago he posted on FB about being the happiest person he has ever been, coming out was a freeing experience, no more secrets and lies, he is happy, secure and confident. While I never dreamed this would happen, I am so happy it has. I have watched this wonderful person struggle for so long and to see him so happy now makes my heart sing. All this to say that your son is still young and in the stage of life which is difficult as he tries to find his way in this world. I have seen many young adults struggle during this time and around age 24/25 they have a better understanding of who they are, where they fit, and have the peace and confidence which comes with it. It may be rough until then, but I am so thankful K has supportive, loving parents who have his back no matter what. Bravo to you two. Be very child deserves that.

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Amy in NH

Amy in NH 6,574

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I am so sorry to hear all that your family is going through. Does he have a diagnosis? It's really difficult in the beginning stages of diagnosis and treatment. Until K is stable on the right meds, the roller coaster of ups and downs will continue. Once he is on the right meds you will all find more peace. Of course adjustments may still be needed, but the right meds will bring stability back to your entire family.

 

My close friend is extremely religious and her oldest child, born a girl and now 24, is now a boy. During the transitioning stages and coming out, this poor person was distraught, depressed and suicidal. She is an atheist through and through. Just a few months ago he posted on FB about being the happiest person he has ever been, coming out was a freeing experience, no more secrets and lies, he is happy, secure and confident. While I never dreamed this would happen, I am so happy it has. I have watched this wonderful person struggle for so long and to see him so happy now makes my heart sing. All this to say that your son is still young and in the stage of life which is difficult as he tries to find his way in this world. I have seen many young adults struggle during this time and around age 24/25 they have a better understanding of who they are, where they fit, and have the peace and confidence which comes with it. It may be rough until then, but I am so thankful K has supportive, loving parents who have his back no matter what. Bravo to you two. Be very child deserves that.

I think in many cases like the one you describe, it is the person's acceptance of themself that is the sticking point. Add in the question of how they fit into the world and it can just be overwhelming.

 

I think what Ellen is describing is true mental illness, though.

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dirty ethel rackham

dirty ethel rackham 12,110

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Just thought I'd update here about K's situation.  K came home last Thursday evening.  They are pretty traumatized and basically want to escape.  Unbeknownst to us, they had planned to go stay with a friend in another state to "get over their anxiety and recover from trauma."  Well, that's not gonna fly.  We don't know this person at all, but we do know that K will not have access to good mental health care while they are there.  Since I am the one who put the kibosh on that, I am the bad guy right now. On Friday, K called their therapist and psychiatrist to inform them of what had happened.  Dh was able to talk to each of them as well to let them know of anything that K omitted or  gave a less-than-accurate account of. All of them recommended that we take K to our local mental health center for an evaluation.  We were hoping that they would not recommend hospitalization because I knew K would not agree to that and would then distrust their opinion.  They instead recommended entering an intensive outpatient program (daily 8:30-3:30).  K said that they would think about that.  I think they still held out hope that we would agree to the escape plan.  Right now, K can hardly get out of bed and only comes out of the room to eat, shower or use the restroom.  I did ask K to walk the dog today and they managed to do a short walk.  But then escaped back to their room. 

 

I feel like we are walking a very fine line.  We are trying very hard to not burn any bridges with them ... to preserve the relationship and build some trust because that is the one thing we have going for us right now.  If we push too hard, they may choose to bolt and then we would not hear from them again.  I am afraid to go to sleep at night.  K is naturally a night own and wakes often at night. 

 

Please pray that K agrees to this outpatient program.  They need the intensive therapy and I need a break from the constant worry and fear of leaving the house. 

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Laurie4b

Laurie4b 57,097

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Just thought I'd update here about K's situation.  K came home last Thursday evening.  They are pretty traumatized and basically want to escape.  Unbeknownst to us, they had planned to go stay with a friend in another state to "get over their anxiety and recover from trauma."  Well, that's not gonna fly.  We don't know this person at all, but we do know that K will not have access to good mental health care while they are there.  Since I am the one who put the kibosh on that, I am the bad guy right now. On Friday, K called their therapist and psychiatrist to inform them of what had happened.  Dh was able to talk to each of them as well to let them know of anything that K omitted or  gave a less-than-accurate account of. All of them recommended that we take K to our local mental health center for an evaluation.  We were hoping that they would not recommend hospitalization because I knew K would not agree to that and would then distrust their opinion.  They instead recommended entering an intensive outpatient program (daily 8:30-3:30).  K said that they would think about that.  I think they still held out hope that we would agree to the escape plan.  Right now, K can hardly get out of bed and only comes out of the room to eat, shower or use the restroom.  I did ask K to walk the dog today and they managed to do a short walk.  But then escaped back to their room. 

 

I feel like we are walking a very fine line.  We are trying very hard to not burn any bridges with them ... to preserve the relationship and build some trust because that is the one thing we have going for us right now.  If we push too hard, they may choose to bolt and then we would not hear from them again.  I am afraid to go to sleep at night.  K is naturally a night own and wakes often at night. 

 

Please pray that K agrees to this outpatient program.  They need the intensive therapy and I need a break from the constant worry and fear of leaving the house. 

So sorry. Just now seeing this. Praying now.  :grouphug:

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ktgrok

ktgrok 75,543

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Praying hard. K sounds a lot like my ex, who also started having break downs in college. He did "escape" and it didn't do him any favors as it established a pattern of blaming external circumstances for internal issues. That said, to give you hope, my ex is now happily married to a lovely girl, and although he is on disability it's for medical reasons, not mental health reasons. He's not a danger to himself or anything any longer. The hardest years were those college years, by far. I think there is just stuff happening in the brain that magnifies the issues at that age. He continued to have issues, but never as bad. 

 

But I'm praying hard. 

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TechWife

TechWife 29,864

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he is on disability it's for medical reasons, not mental health reasons.

Mental health is a medical issue. Those on disability with a psychiatric diagnosis are medically disabled.

 

OP, I hope K will get the help he needs. Many hugs to you.

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ktgrok

ktgrok 75,543

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Mental health is a medical issue. Those on disability with a psychiatric diagnosis are medically disabled.

 

OP, I hope K will get the help he needs. Many hugs to you.

 

Oh, I didn't mean to say they aren't. I was just trying to clarify that the mental health issues were not the reason he was on disability. He has cardiomyopathy and kidney disease that he developed years later, and that's why he is on disability. Before that he was working and living independently, and maintaining fairly well on a combination of antidepressants/antianxiety meds. Finding the right one took a long time, and there are other issues at play, but it did get better as he got older. 

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Miss Mousie

Miss Mousie 2,640

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Thank you for the update, Ellen.  There are positives in there; try not to lose sight of them. 

 

I hope K accepts the treatment recommendation and finds some help and relief.

 

I also hope you have your own source of help and relief.  Take care of yourself.

 

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Nan in Mass

Nan in Mass 14,492

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Hugs. Thank you for telling us.

 

Eta I so know that hands tied problem. You can,t help if they don,t trust you and you can,t help because they trust you. Trust is so easy to lose. You thread your way carefully down a very thin boarderline. Try to keep breathing. Hugs.

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Mom25girls

Mom25girls 320

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Just reading this now. Sending prayers for all of you and all who help guide you at this time. Hugs...Prayers...I wish that I knew the combination of words that would bring you some degree of peace and comfort. Deep breaths...and praying.

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