Need a book on sex & dating for teens (CC)

[Janie Grace]

Can you recommend a book that explores what it looks like to navigate relationships/dating/sex as a Christian? I read Passion & Purity as a teen, but it's a bit dated now. The current culture is so okay with "sex as recreational activity" -- I think older books take for granted that people are aware of the deeper meaning/purpose of sex, but I'd guess that's something more current books would not assume and would address more directly. I'm looking for something for older teens. Not preachy or legalistic, but direct and clear on God's design for sex (i.e., within marriage only) and how to navigate singleness and temptation.

 

If you don't like the traditional Christian perspective on sex and want to discuss that, please start a new thread. Just looking for book recommendations. Thanks!

[Cindy in FL.]

I don't have any suggestions, but look forward to seeing what others recommend. Hopefully you'll get some good ideas!

[Mom2Five]

If for a girl I saw a few books written by Elisabeth Elliott along those lines. Those might be considered dated though lol

 

ETA- I had to look up the one I had in mind for my boy. It is Thoughts for Young Men by J.C. Ryle. Again prob dated but these are the ones I will likely use along with whatever else is found between now and then.

Edited March 23, 2016 by Mom2Five

[FriedClams]

My son is reading "Dating with Integrity". It's a Sonlight core read.

[Tess in the Burbs]

http://www.amazon.com/Teaching-True-Love-Sex-at-13-Generation/dp/084994256X?ie=UTF8&psc=1&redirect=true&ref_=ox_sc_sfl_title_2&smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER

 

I just read this and WHOA.  Totally shocking how the Christian kids are engaged in a lot of activity I can't begin to type about  :ohmy:  I think it's a good read for teens so they can understand the peer pressure isn't just the non Christian kids.  It does try to talk about standing apart and not being part of this, but I personally think it's best used to explain to the teens what's going on with teens/young adults.  The hooking up culture is widely accepted and choosing another path is going to be hard, but worth it. 

[Chris in VA]

I was going to suggest Dating with Integrity, but after looking at it, it seems to say, "stay friends," and doesn't really address actual dating, that may include kissing and such. Maybe you can shed some light, Fried Clams.

 

I haven't found anything that goes along with what I believe, honestly. Just had a very direct and "real" talk with dd about it all. Wish I had a book to go thru with her.

[6packofun]

This book gets so many good reviews that I want to read it.  (But haven't. I think the author's style might be a love it or hate it kind of thing.  lol)  http://www.christianbook.com/dating-manifesto-drama-pursuing-marriage-purpose/lisa-anderson/9781434708878/pd/708872

 

Also, this one!  I've only read excerpts, but I liked it:  Sex, Dating, and Relationships: A Fresh Approach  http://www.christianbook.com/sex-dating-and-relationships-fresh-approach/gerald-hiestand/9781433527111/pd/527111?event=PRCBD1

[Scarlett]

The only book I can think of is the Bible.  :)  Seriously, though, so much of society is ok with sex outside of marriage...even religious people.  

 

A few years back my then 18year old niece (in front of her mother/my sister) asked my opinion of her having sex with her boyfriend.  She wanted to get on bc...and it was a big discussion.  She is not of my faith...so I didn't want to come across as preachy.  But I just said, 'well, it depends on whose standards you want to live by. You will find people all day long tell you it is ok to have sex outside of marriage, but if you read what God's Word says on the matter you will see it is very clear that he prohibits it.'  She said, 'yeah, but that is so outdated and yeah but is that really what it means.'  Her mom interrupted her and said, 'There is no doubt about what it says.  You can follow it or not, but the message is clear.'

 

With my own son, he is being taught by me, and by our faith, to not have sex before marriage.  But to that end we also do not 'date' in the way most of society does.  Our teens are together a lot...but not unsupervised/mixed groups.        We teach them to head off the temptation by avoiding certain situations....for one don't date until you are prepared to marry.  (doesn't mean you will marry the first person you date)  

 

My mom taught me that teen hormones are strong and very real...and it is important to keep that in mind.  They need to know what can happen and how quickly it can happen even with the best of intentions.