Apartment living with young kids

[pinkmint]

Does anyone do this (or have you done it in the past)? 

 

If you have read my other posts, this goes along with life things I'm trying figure out with DH. We have been in a small rental house for the past 3 years. It is not in the best area, nor is it close to DH's work. It's not very nice in any way other than that it's an actual house, which has obvious advantages with young children. 

 

Before this house we did live in apartments with a baby and toddler. The things that were hard for me were neighbors noises (loud violent video games, "adult" movies, weed/ cigarette smoke and not having an outdoor space). They didn't complain about our noise so I guess that's good but I am only asking about this for lack of other good options. 

 

I'm concerned about trying apartment living now because my kids are older and there's more of them, they're not quiet and we homeschool so they're just here all the time unlike some kids who live in apartments and aren't actually there most of the time or are sleeping most of the time they're there. 

 

I did grow up in apartments, I just feel like there's different variables to my current life and it wouldn't be the same, so I'm wondering if anyone who currently does this can tell me about it. 

Edited March 21, 2016 by pinkmint

[SparklyUnicorn]

I don't recommend it if you have a choice, but there are probably tons and tons of people who live in apartments with young kids. 

 

 

[Butter]

We lived in an apartment for two years when Ani and Cameron were little (2-4 and 4-6).  Maybe we got lucky in the apartment complex we picked, but the neighbors were wonderful and not loud at all (we actually heard more neighbor noises in the townhouse we lived in for the next 3 years).  I'd totally live in an apartment again.

[Garga]

Instead of an apartment complex, can you find a house that's been converted into only 2 apartment?  An upstairs and downstairs?  It would be cheaper than renting an entire house, but you would only be sharing the space with one other family.  Not sure about pricing for something like that compared to complexes.

 

When I was a kid we lived in an apartment that was like that: an upstairs and downstairs.  And in my first year of marriage it was the same thing.  They were both the same size as an apartment in a complex.  I don't know how much my parents paid, but when I was married, my converted house apartment was the same or cheaper than complexes.  (This was 23 years ago, however...)

 

 

Edited March 21, 2016 by Garga

[MrsWeasley]

I lived in an apartment with a five year old and two year old as a SAHM. If possible, have a ground level apartment to minimize noise complaints from neighbors. However, it often comes down to luck as to whether you have a neighbor who minds or not. For what it's worth, most people are gone during the day anyway.

[OneStepAtATime]

If an apartment were in a better neighborhood and nearer to your husband's work place, it might be worth the move.  Agree with above, get  a ground floor unit if possible. Also, see if there is one near a park (walking distance).  I realize that may be a total long shot...

[SparklyUnicorn]

I've never lived in a complex.  Only multi family houses.  The biggest one had 4 apartments.  Sometimes we had good and understanding neighbors.  Sometimes nope.  They complained about every little thing.  One childless couple in particular complained because I got up too early in the morning for them.  Of course they thought it was fine that they were loud until 3 am. 

[Bluegoat]

I think there are so many variables.  One thing that could be bothersome is not having a place to send them out without you, but then that might not be possible where you live now anyway.

 

I think if you looked for a family friendly building it could be just fine.

[MrsMommy]

A ground floor unit is a must. Also, if you can get a feel for the complex before you commit, it will help. We lived in one complex that was primarily college students/just out of college young adults. It really had a party atmosphere, and if we had realized that before we signed the lease, we would have looked elsewhere. On the other hand, after that we moved to a more family-oriented complex, and it was totally different. I still remember living there fondly.

[Lady Marmalade]

As perpetual renters, we thought we'd finally arrived when we found a house to rent after years of duplex and apartment living. 

 

Like you, we settled for a not-so-great location simply because, omg, it was a whole house!  All to ourselves!  Then we moved to a second house, slightly better location as far as it being closer to where we wanted to be.  There were lots of issues though... not the least of which was learning that there were at least 6 sax offenders living within a 3 block radius. But again, it was a whole house all for us to live in.  

 

And then we were forced to move quickly, so took the first thing we could find that we could fit in- we were back to duplex living.

 

Oddly enough, we absolutely LOVE it.  Love, love, love!  The neighbors are not great, but they're not terrible.  We get their smoke drifting over on nice days when the windows are open, their dog is very irritating, and a few other trivial things.  But the location!  We are living exactly where we want to- I no longer have 30 minute drives through town to get to our activities- 7 minutes tops now.  The location and the serious cut in drive time is worth every moment of duplex living.   Ours is a side-by-side with garages between our living spaces, so the only actual house noises we have are the automatic garage doors going up and down.  When it's nice out and the windows are open, obviously there is more noise, but the trade offs are beyond worth it to me.  

 

The exterior of our duplex is dumpy.  The landlords aren't quite slum-lords, they do fix things as needed, but clearly don't desire to put any money into the property.  Okay by us, because the rent is cheaper than many of the complexes in the area.

[Arcadia]

I have stayed in apartments and condos all my life. However we have always live in busy city areas so noise is kind of given from traffic and humans talking.

My kids are now 11 and 10. We moved into this condo when they were two under two. We are the only ones at home from 9am to 4pm other than some retirees. Neighborhood kids are usually home after dinnertime.

 

ETA:

We also have swimming pool, gym, billard room, tennis court and kids play room on site in the apartments we stayed in. So my kids love it.

Edited March 21, 2016 by Arcadia

[pinkmint]

Lady M, that's kinda what I would hope to find if we looked for an apartment. I do not need brand new everything/ granite countertops etc. Just relatively clean, safe and in a better location. 

 

Oh we got sex offenders too! 2 houses down, matter of fact. 

 

[madteaparty]

Edited bc while I've lived in apartments and townhouses my entire life save 2 yrs, this was always in urban areas, where everyone lives in apartments...so not really helpful to op.

Edited March 21, 2016 by madteaparty

[Upward Journey]

I think there are so many variables.  One thing that could be bothersome is not having a place to send them out without you, but then that might not be possible where you live now anyway.

 

I think if you looked for a family friendly building it could be just fine.

 

We're currently in an apartment and this was by far the hardest adjustment to make. I thought I was going to go crazy the first year we were here.

 

The others things that took a while to adjust to were: having shared laundry facilities and having to be so conscience of our noise level.

[Mergath]

I agree that you should look for a duplex of some kind rather than an apartment complex. We live in a great up/down duplex in the country. It's really nice, the neighbors are friends of dh's, and we have a huge yard with a garden. It's 100% no smoking, and is soundproofed so well we almost never hear a thing from downstairs. Plus, it's very affordable, and all utilities except electric are included in the rent. When you're inside, you'd never know it's not a single family home.

 

Apartment/duplex living doesn't have to be a noisy, secondhand smoke-filled nightmare, but it can take a while to find a good place. It helps to ask around, too. That's how we found this place.

[Bluegoat]

Even if a duplex (or triplex) isn't a possibility, I've found smaller, low-rise apartments tend to have a better atmosphere, all other things being equal.  Around here there are quite a few older brick ones from the 60s, usually two or three stories, and they can be pretty nice.  And usually no carpets either.  And they don't try and suck people in with expensive but ultimately pretty useless things like faddish countertops.

Edited March 21, 2016 by Bluegoat

[Kristie in Florida]

I've been in apartments my entire adult life. I will not hesitate to tell the proper authorities that I smell weed next door or their music is too loud. I live near a college campus so that sort of thing happens a lot.

 

The thing that annoys me the most is that I have two boys now and there is no safe place for them to go run around and play. There aren't any playgrounds nearby either.

 

We tend to be quiet but most people around tend to be gone all day while we are home all day. We haven't had those types of noise issues.

[ezrabean2005]

We've lived in an apartment (different ones) for the last 10 years (our youngest is 10.5).  The apartments that were great were usually (slightly) more expensive.  Most people are gone during the day.  If it is well-built, you won't have as much noise from your family or others.  If you are on a corner you will likely share a wall with a laundry room or garbage chute (both good things).  Good apartment policies on smoking, noise, etc. are worth a lot especially when the management is present each day (like in an onsite office).  There also might be periods of having louder neighbors who move away, to be replaced with quieter ones.  

 

When we moved to our current, wonderful apartment, we watched the grounds, management, etc. for about a year to see how it was (how quickly snow was plowed, how often vacancies were occurring, how clean the grounds stayed - especially since this place allows pets / dogs).  A bit of research, reading the resident handbook/policies, and several tours at different times of day can tell you a lot about a place before you sign a lease.

 

HTH.  Honestly, if we could stay in our apartment forever it would so great.  I love it here.

[maize]

We were in apartments until a few years ago. Towards the end I had children ages 7, 5, 2, and a baby.

 

Some complexes are more family friendly than others.

[Crimson Wife]

A townhouse is better if you can find one in your budget. I'd live in a townhouse again no problem but would try to avoid an apartment unless I had no other choice. We lived in a townhouse for years and never heard any noise from our neighbors despite having them on both sides (one a family with multiple children). Thicker walls between the units than the apartments we'd lived in previously.

[foxbridgeacademy]

We lived in a couple apartments and townhouses when the kids were little. It was okay as long as you don't mind sitting outside watching them while they play (I never let mine run loose unsupervised YMMV).

 

Have you thought about moving to a smaller town with a lower COL?  We have lived in several towns where the average rent for a 2 bedroom duplex is around $450-$500 per month ($700 for a 3 bedroom house).  Gas is cheap, utilities and groceries are average.  There are jobs in the service industry but little in manufacturing without driving 30-45 minutes away (or none at all).  Some of these towns are in the South more up North, they're livable just not exciting.

[LucyStoner]

We are in an apartment and have been for 3 years. The complex is kid friendly and has a playground so the kids do have someplace to play. It's nice looking but simple on the the inside. My main advice is ground floor with in unit W/D if at all possible. I'd rather hear other people's noise than have people complain about my kids running around. Utilities are also lower in apartments as a general rule. I prefer an apartment in a nice walkable location to a house in a bad neighborhood or where I am exclusively car-bound just to get some milk.

[pinkmint]

LOL at "sax offenders". I'd rather live near one of those than a sex offender. 

[JumpyTheFrog]

We were in a second floor apartment until my oldest was 2 1/2. Then a childess women who worked from home at night and slept during the day moved in. She expected us keep him silent and the stress of it led to us moving out. Do you knownthat feeling you have at hotels trying to keep your kids quiet so they don't disturb people? All day every day was like that for me once she moved in and I was expecting another baby. We decided to break our lease and go rent a house.

[pinkmint]

The trouble is finding a decent, safe, clean, well-located apartment at a reasonable price. Rents have gone nuts where we are. The reasonable apartments I see are renting for double our current rent and that's not realistic for us. My thought is to find an old, maybe even 1950's etc apartment that is decently kept and in a decent area. I don't know. 

[LucyStoner]

Another thing to consider: large apartment buildings often have stricter tenant screening policies than small landlords who rent out a few homes in questionable areas. Our complex is 4 buildings each with about 18-24 units. They don't rent to sex offenders or people with recent felony convictions, they authenticate rental/housing history and don't rent to people with a history of housing problems. With rare exception, I like my nieghbors and even the ones I don't like much are people I don't worry about around my kids. I send the boys outside to play quite a bit. No worries. Aside from a neighbor who occasionally practices music at odd hours, kids playing outside the window or the three kids upstairs, I rarely hear my neighbors.

[LucyStoner]

The trouble is finding a decent, safe, clean, well-located apartment at a reasonable price. Rents have gone nuts where we are. The reasonable apartments I see are renting for double our current rent and that's not realistic for us. My thought is to find an old, maybe even 1950's etc apartment that is decently kept and in a decent area. I don't know.

Ask around, call a real estate agent who does rentals. They may know of units that are so consistently rented they aren't really publically advertised in order to fill them.

[Laura Corin]

We lived in apartments from when Calvin was six months old until he was about eleven.  It was a good experience - we neither complained nor were complained about.

[Amira]

My youngest is eight now, but we've spent lots of time in apartments with little children, including in two-bedrooms with five people, and in different cities and countries. Personally, I love living in an apartment. There are some disadvantages (we had one neighbor who lived below us who thought we were too noisy- she came up the first day we were moving in to tell us to stop moving the furniture and called several times a week for a year) but most of the time I prefer it to anything else. That one neighbor was the only one we've ever had trouble with in nearly 20 years of complex and multi-family unit living.

 

The sorts of complexes that are easy to move into (low deposit, no background or security check, lots of turnover) are not often good places to live. Pick a place that makes sure your neighbors are reliable and that enforces its rules, especially about noise. Those requirements protect the landlord, but they also protect you.

 

Our kids have LOVED living in complexes with lots of kids. Our current complex has dozens of kids and we have a great time living here, despite the tight quarters.

[Chris in VA]

We lived in rental apartments until our boys were 6 and 8. One good thing was that we were on a property that had two pools and a nice playground. In Dallas and FL, it's so nice to have a pool! Our boys were little fish.

 

We moved to a rental house in a great neighborhood and lived there 4 wonderful years.

 

I think we were pretty fortunate in our living accomodations.

 

I do like ammenities that good complexes offer. IDK what area you live in, but having a rec area and a pool were definite perks.

[maize]

My youngest is eight now, but we've spent lots of time in apartments with little children, including in two-bedrooms with five people, and in different cities and countries. Personally, I love living in an apartment. There are some disadvantages (we had one neighbor who lived below us who thought we were too noisy- she came up the first day we were moving in to tell us to stop moving the furniture and called several times a week for a year) but most of the time I prefer it to anything else. That one neighbor was the only one we've ever had trouble with in nearly 20 years of complex and multi-family unit living.

 

The sorts of complexes that are easy to move into (low deposit, no background or security check, lots of turnover) are not often good places to live. Pick a place that makes sure your neighbors are reliable and that enforces its rules, especially about noise. Those requirements protect the landlord, but they also protect you.

 

Our kids have LOVED living in complexes with lots of kids. Our current complex has dozens of kids and we have a great time living here, despite the tight quarters.

 

 

We had a nightmare experience when living in a complex with lots of kids. Involved neighbor kids breaking into our apartment when we were out of town, stealing stuff, and very nearly setting it on fire. Parents did not supervise their kids at all there.

[eternalsummer]

We lived in apartments when I was a kid - maybe 4 or 5 different complexes over the years?  (we moved a lot).

 

It was fine as far as I knew.  I loved having all the other kids around, and my parents generally managed to find complexes with pools or playgrounds.

 

The best was when we lived in Married Student Housing at the University of Texas.

[MistyMountain]

I lived in an apartment style condo with 2 bedrooms while my 3 kids were young. It was fine. We had a storage room and a garage that was really helpful. The kids did not know any different. We lived in the bottom floor so no one complained about noise and we did not have any noise or smoke issues. I actually have more issues with neighbor kids now that we live in a house.

Edited March 22, 2016 by MistyMountain

[Danestress]

I have never done it. I have lived with three kids in a 900 square foot house on a military base. That was in Southern California, so we were never cooped up with weather and neighbors had some accountability.

 

But if I could have more of my DH, live in a decent apartment, and save money, I would consider it. A small place is less to clean. Sometimes I miss it. Often a decent newer apartment would have less maintenance than a rental home, and if the maintenance is reasonably responsive, it probably beats having to beg the owner of a single home rental.

 

Definitely try to live in a ground floor and really check out how solid the building is and whether noise carries. Carpeting would help. I had a friend who lived below a family that let their kids roller skate all the time on the wood floors. She did not become a good friend:). Don't do that!

 

Also, see if the police haven an online search for calls within a certain distance of an address. You want to know what you are getting into!

[Arcadia]

I actually avoid the ground floor because the ants and bugs problems are usually worse than the upper floors.

Also we like to open our patio doors and keep our blinds/curtains open to let in the sunlight and being on the upper floor provides more privacy.

We have always stayed in complex with elevators so double strollers aren't a problem. Underground garage is great during raining season. We also go for those with a leasing office that is open 7 days a week and has maintenance crew on-site.

[lllll]

nm

Edited November 15, 2016 by cathey