Jump to content

Menu

Coffee colonics et al VENT


Chris in VA
 Share

Recommended Posts

My in laws used to do daily coffee enemas. For the longest time I thought the coffee pot in their bathroom was just there because they wanted their coffee fast & close in the mornings. Then I put two and two together and realized their bathroom pot was for the enema coffee (only organic!).

 

This was during the time they were in a raw food diet with lots of juicing - my father in law really, truly turned orange from all of the carrot juice. He looked like he was made of plastic that had discolored over time like an old Barbie.

 

That being said, it reversed my mil's rheumatoid arthritis and she was able to get off all meds and in her doctor's words, "If I hadn't known how sick you were and seen your bloodwork, I'd say you were perfectly healthy." But, it's not a sustainable lifestyle, especially for them, so they don't follow the diet anymore and she is on meds again, but not nearly as much as she once was.

Edited by Dulce Domem
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think I remember a news article (which I will NOT google, tyvm) about teens getting drunk during school breaks using this method of administration.  They were caught because they absorbed too much alcohol and nearly got really hurt.  I wonder about caffeine absorption levels in this idea... So, I guess, Red Bull would be contraindicated? 

I can't believe I'm still giggling about this.  Thanks a lot, ya'll! 

 

So do you think maybe decaf isn't as effective?  :p 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

:rofl: I think your post button got in the Red Bull. ;)

 

I wasn't actually recommending putting Red Bull in an enema. In case someone wonders. I don't play a doctor on tv, but that sounds like a terrible idea. Isn't it carbonated? So many nos...

Carbonated! Oh my! That just created a whole new dimension to the scene in my head. 

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I remember reading an article a year or two ago about a "colonics" facility that had recently opened nearby.   It was in one of those regional advertising flyers that comes in the junk mail.   I couldn't believe then that (1) this was an actual thing; (2) people will PAY MONEY to have it done TO them; or (3) enough people will actually ADMIT to having done this voluntarily for this facility to stay in business.   Just yuck.

 

With coffee?   Double yuck.   It sounds like a fraternity hazing ritual to me.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Ugh. My mom tried to tell me a while back that coffee enemas cure cancer. I just nodded politely and tried not to look too horrified.

 

 

And I was trying to get to the bottom of the thread because I have a friend who is/was going through a "natural" cancer healing method.  And she was doing coffee enemas.  Daily.  Some of the other stuff made sense.  Organic green smoothies - specific ingredients - every morning.  LOTS of supplements.  Tea in the afternoon.  Her doctor's thought process was that if you can get the bad out, your body will heal itself from the cancer.  But you have to get all the "bad" out first.  Oh, and you end up basically on the Hallelujah diet.  I looked at that once and decided there was no possible way I could eat like that.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And I was trying to get to the bottom of the thread because I have a friend who is/was going through a "natural" cancer healing method.  And she was doing coffee enemas.  Daily.  Some of the other stuff made sense.  Organic green smoothies - specific ingredients - every morning.  LOTS of supplements.  Tea in the afternoon.  Her doctor's thought process was that if you can get the bad out, your body will heal itself from the cancer.  But you have to get all the "bad" out first.  Oh, and you end up basically on the Hallelujah diet.  I looked at that once and decided there was no possible way I could eat like that.

And while you are getting the bad out, the cancer continues to spread. Steve Jobs might still be alive if he had done conventional treatment rather than nine months of alternative treatments first. His cancer spread a lot while he did those treatments from what I've read. Of course, we will never know for sure.

 

 

I'm amazed at the number of people who do not trust modern medicine. Ok, I can get that in some respects, but I believe with all my heart if my oncologist found doing coffee enemas cured cancer, she would administer them herself. She hates cancer.  

  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

My in laws used to do daily coffee enemas. For the longest time I thought the coffee pot in their bathroom was just there because they wanted their coffee fast & close in the mornings. Then I put two and two together and realized their bathroom pot was for the enema coffee (only organic!).

 

 

That being said, it reversed my mil's rheumatoid arthritis and she was able to get off all meds and in her doctor's words, "If I hadn't known how sick you were and seen your bloodwork, I'd say you were perfectly healthy." 

 

Whatever reversed your MIL's arthritis it's highly unlikely it was due to putting coffee up her ass. Correlation might have made it appear that was the cause, but correlation does not equal causation.

 

And while you are getting the bad out, the cancer continues to spread. Steve Jobs might still be alive if he had done conventional treatment rather than nine months of alternative treatments first. His cancer spread a lot while he did those treatments from what I've read. Of course, we will never know for sure.

 

 

I'm amazed at the number of people who do not trust modern medicine. Ok, I can get that in some respects, but I believe with all my heart if my oncologist found doing coffee enemas cured cancer, she would administer them herself. She hates cancer.  

 

Yep. He had an unusual form of pancreatic cancer in that it was highly treatable. Only about 5% of pancreatic cancer is as slow growing and responsive to treatment as his was. It's very likely that he'd still be alive and in remission if he hadn't chosen magical thinking over modern medicine. He came to regret his decision, but by then it was too late. It had spread far.

 

I don't understand the mistrust of modern medicine either. Do people really not know what it was like before? Is the naturalistic fallacy that persuasive?

 

  Her doctor's thought process was that if you can get the bad out, your body will heal itself from the cancer.  But you have to get all the "bad" out first.  

 

 

^^^ Reason 435 to earn college degree

 

Sadly the quote above yours about a medical doctor's belief shows that you can be highly educated and still succumb to the woo of magical thinking. Sigh.

Edited by Lady Florida
  • Like 7
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sadly the quote above yours about a medical doctor's belief shows that you can be highly educated and still succumb to the woo of magical thinking. Sigh.

 

I completely agree with you. My thought was that ideally, having a college education would give one enough employment options to be able to avoid taking on the job of enema barista, administering Pike's Place Pooper Polisher (available with soy). 

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I completely agree with you. My thought was that ideally, having a college education would give one enough employment options to be able to avoid taking on the job of enema barista, administering Pike's Place Pooper Polisher (available with soy). 

 

I think I need to make sure ds understands why it's important to continue his education. 

 

"You don't want to be an enema barista do you?" Do you!!!???" :D

  • Like 10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Y'all. I'm grading fifth-grade spelling tests and the word "colonies" and "bottom" are next to each other. . . . . . which I of course misread as "colonics" and start laughing until tears come out of my eyes.

 

WAY too hard to explain to my kids why mom can't stop laughing. :lol:

  • Like 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have a friend who had a cancerous tumor removed and has done the follow up with all natural supplements and treatments and she has also done coffee enemas. She has worked closely with an MD who has focused on natural cancer treatment options.

 

My mom sees one of the most respected oncologists in our area, and even he admitted recently (after my cousin died from organ failure directly related to her cancer treatment), that chemo does a lot of damage to the body and he often loses patients who are technically cancer-free to organ failure. Modern medicine is great, but it is by no means perfect. I think there is still much to learn about alternative ways to treat cancer.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Carbonated! Oh my! That just created a whole new dimension to the scene in my head. 

 

 

I once read a true account of an emergency room visit which was a result of someone trying to do a coke enema.  They shook up the bottle and uncapped it in his behind - as you can imagine, the suction created pulled part of his bowel into the bottle.

 

Then they tried to get it out with a coat-hanger.

 

He presented in the ER with hiccups that wouldn't go away.

 

Anyway - I am convinced that are just many ideas that are bad, bad, bad, no matter how fun or healthy or whatever they might seem.

Edited by Bluegoat
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

What. In. The. WORLD?!?

 

Now I've heard everything.

Unfortunately, NOT true. For example, did you know that Levi's is now selling Wedgie Fit jeans?

 

http://www.levi.com/us/en_US/category/women/clothing/collections/levi-collections-thewedgiefit?ab=home_a3_wedgie_w_011916

 

And that's just from the realm of things that don't belong in the derrière!

Edited by RioSamba
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I once read a true account of an emergency room visit which was a result of someone trying to do a coke enema.  They shook up the bottle and uncapped it in his behind - as you can imagine, the suction created pulled part of his bowel into the bottle.

 

Then they tried to get it out with a coat-hanger.

 

He presented in the ER with hiccups that wouldn't go away.

 

Anyway - I am convinced that are just many ideas that are bad, bad, bad, no matter how fun or healthy or whatever they might seem.

 

You are kidding. Are you kidding? You have to be kidding. I can't even... I'll be honest and say that it wouldn't occur to me about the suction, but it also wouldn't occur to me, even if I thought it would ever, EEEEEEEVER be a good idea to do a Coke enema, to do it straight from the bottle. And the coat hanger--well, that's a bad idea from the get-go, no critical thinking needed there. What on earth?!

 

Please say you're kidding.

 

Unfortunately, NOT true. For example, did you know that Levi's is now selling Wedgie Fit jeans?

 

http://www.levi.com/us/en_US/category/women/clothing/collections/levi-collections-thewedgiefit?ab=home_a3_wedgie_w_011916

 

And that's just from the realm of things that don't belong in the derrière!

 

This is almost--not quite, but just a hair shy--as horrifying the coke-enema-and-coat-hanger-solution story. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

A meme for you all. :D

 

starbutts.jpg

 

 

 

I wish that science writers would learn the art of the sound bite the way pseudoscience promoters have. This article is a bit long, as science articles that refute nonsense usually are, but worth reading. It's not as long as some others I found though, which is why I chose it.

 

http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2015/12/10/starbutts-or-how-is-it-still-a-thing-that-people-are-shooting-coffee-up-their-nether-regions/

  • Like 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Unfortunately, NOT true. For example, did you know that Levi's is now selling Wedgie Fit jeans?

 

http://www.levi.com/us/en_US/category/women/clothing/collections/levi-collections-thewedgiefit?ab=home_a3_wedgie_w_011916

 

And that's just from the realm of things that don't belong in the derrière!

 

What. The. Crap?!?!

 

(Interesting crap?  I suppose it would be quite interesting if it included coffee, Coke, Red Bull, or any of the other bizarre things people think should be in an enema.)

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think I remember a news article (which I will NOT google, tyvm) about teens getting drunk during school breaks using this method of administration.  They were caught because they absorbed too much alcohol and nearly got really hurt.  I wonder about caffeine absorption levels in this idea... So, I guess, Red Bull would be contraindicated? 

I can't believe I'm still giggling about this.  Thanks a lot, ya'll! 

 

It's called butt chugging and they use vodka or cough syrup. And they also soak a tampon in it.  Gets dangerous really fast. Like you, I wonder about the caffeine absorption with a coffee enema.  So they do that for weeks and when they stop they feel awful which leads them to think the coffee enemas were keeping them feeling well...when reality might be the 'feeling awful' could be caffeine withdrawal. 

 

Who was the first person who tried butt chugging and HOW did he get the next person to try it? Same with the coffee enemas...daily? Yikes. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I haven't actually had the courage to read about it!

 

I wouldn't have either but a dear friend was battling cancer and so many people were suggesting alternatives and she didn't want to try crazy stuff but also didn't want to overlook a valid treatment so some of us looked into suggestions for her. And a coffee enema was one of the ideas.  It might be worthwhile in some situations but not for my lovely friend. 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I wouldn't have either but a dear friend was battling cancer and so many people were suggesting alternatives and she didn't want to try crazy stuff but also didn't want to overlook a valid treatment so some of us looked into suggestions for her. And a coffee enema was one of the ideas.  It might be worthwhile in some situations but not for my lovely friend. 

 

In what situations have coffee enemas been shown to have a positive effect on cancer? 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In what situations have coffee enemas been shown to have a positive effect on cancer? 

 

None that I know of.  When she was so ill, she had a Facebook page to update everyone at once so the family could post about doc visits, etc. without worrying that anyone was left out.  As her story spread people from all over the country joined the page and there were just dozens and dozens of suggestions...eat organic, turmeric, cinnamon, cleanses of all kinds, acupuncture...the list was endless. And Patty (and her family) were grateful that people cared enough to offer suggestions and since there was really little we could do, as friends we took on the task of checking things out. She could then say 'checked it out and it's not going to work for me' or when something did seem appropriate, thanks for the idea. 

 

Sorry if I made it sound like coffee enemas would cure cancer- they might help something somewhere but I didn't try to determine that.  So I didn't say it's total hooey because we didn't look into it that deeply- all we looked at was whether it was a viable option for our friend.   

 

I'm probably not being really clear- sometimes when a person is terminal the suggestions from well meaning friends can be overwhelming. And she (and her husband and kids) didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings- they made suggestions out of caring even if they were hooey.  But we as her friends, could be the ones to run interference for that. 

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can not take seriously anyone who shoves coffee up their ass.  No matter what else they might say or do, I'll just tune them out.  Kool-Aid is a much better option.

 

Glad I wasn't drinking coffee when I read this!

 

Hmmm, I guess I always considered the sphincter a one way valve.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Who was the first person who tried butt chugging and HOW did he get the next person to try it? Same with the coffee enemas...daily? Yikes. 

 

The ancient Maya were well-versed in "butt chugging," though they practised it with pulque rather than vodka or cough syrup. ;)

 

You can see a beautiful pot featuring it at the Princeton University Art Museum.

 

link to a rollout photo:  https://decipherment.files.wordpress.com/2014/06/figure-7.jpg

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

What I want to know about the wedgie fit jeans is why in the world someone would want them (and pay $88-158 for them?!?!). See that much outline of a butt is not attractive and they absolutely cannot be comfortable.

Unfathomable, I agree! I told my daughter about them and her first assumption was that they were wedgie *preventative* jeans.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Okay soooo...

 

Last night I was watching an old movie with Steve McQueen in it. Since I know very little about the man, I went to the internet for more information. Found out he died at age 50 from mesothelioma, but that in the months prior to his death he went to Mexico for alternative cancer treatments, one of which included.... you guessed it... coffee enemas.

 

So apparently this snake oil treatment has been around for a while. He died in the 1970's. (And note, the treatment did nothing for him.)

 

 

I remember when he got sick. It was big news at the time because he was still quite popular. I knew about his alternative treatment, but what made the news back then was his going to Mexico for laetrile. I never knew that about the other quackery, including coffee enemas.

 

BTW, yes snake oil has been around for a long time. For an eye opening look at snake oil then and now, I highly recommend Do You Believe in Magic?: The Sense and Nonsense of Alternative Medicine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...