Did anyone's dc stay on campus over Thanksgiving?

[hopskipjump]

Most of the universities dd is considering are far away from home. The nearest of those, at this point, is about a 10-hour drive.

 

We've been factoring in flights/drives back/forth to each university as we're looking at costs. But, I've just been factoring, at minimum:

 

flight THERE in the fall

flight HOME at Christmas break

flight THERE after Christmas break

flight HOME after spring semester is over

perhaps one additional flight HOME and THERE again around Easter if she's feeling homesick (not too likely... and I bet her team will probably also be practicing over Easter break...)

 

(She'll be an athlete, and they always are "on" during Spring Break, so she won't be coming home then)

 

So, I obviously hadn't considered Thanksgiving at all. I'm thinking she should stay there and use that peaceful time to study, relax, have some quiet time before finals. Is that crazy? Does ANYONE stay? I was just at our state flagship over Thanksgiving break and it was a ghost town.

 

Some of the universities we're considering have nearby family, so she could go visit them for Thanksgiving Day, stay overnight, and head back (or, she could stay with them the entire break if she wanted...) - but others have no one there. The girls she's met while on official visits have insinuated that the way-out-of-state girls often go home with other girls on the short holiday weekends... but of course, there are no guarantees of that until she's there... living that life. lol

[J-rap]

I've known of many students who weren't able to go home for Thanksgiving.  Almost always, a roommate or someone (who lives closer) will end up inviting them.

 

When my son was going to school in NYC we couldn't afford to bring him home.  But, he had a job as a waiter in Times Square, so I think he just worked that day.

 

Since then we've learned some tricks.  For example, we have a credit card that collects mile points.  We also have linked our frequent flyer number to the airline's "Sky Mall" which gives us points for shopping at many stores that we tend to shop at.   We've gotten many kids home with those miles!

[Jenny in Florida]

Both of the colleges my kids have attended closed their campuses during Thanksgiving break. So, it wouldn't be possible for students to stay in dorms. One of my son's friends is going to school far away from home, though, and his family determined it wasn't possible to get him home for the holiday. I believe he did stay on campus. I guess this means you would need to find out the policy from each individual school.

[ThisIsTheDay]

One of dd's roommates stayed over the holiday, but she has family close by, and they actually came to visit her over Thanksgiving. I guess they brought the meal with them, because there were leftovers in their fridge!

[Sebastian (a lady)]

As Jenny mentioned, often dorms are closed over breaks and students are required to be out of them.  I think often there is a temp dorm designated for students who are staying on campus.

 

I think that often friends and roommates will invite people home for Thanksgiving.  I know that few of the college students I know from Hawaii are able to make it home for Thanksgiving, because the cost of the flight and the time required are so restrictive.

 

 

[Mom22ns]

My kids colleges both close dorms for Thanksgiving. There is one dorm kept open and they can pay an extra fee to stay there. I remember my sister bringing a friend home for Thanksgiving because she couldn't afford the flight. I would say there is a good chance of your child spending Thanksgiving with a friend or roommate, but I think all schools give an option for staying. The schools are all ghost towns though. Very few stay.

[Sunshine State Sue]

Ds did not come home for Thanksgiving.  He has games over both Thanksgiving and Christmas break.  The dorms remain open over Thanksgiving.  He and 2 teammates found a restaurant on Thanksgiving day.  He stayed with off-campus teammates after dorms closed for Christmas and before dorms opened after Christmas due to practice/games.  There are generally still games over spring break, so he didn't come home then either.  I can't remember if dorms closed.  If they did, he stayed with off-campus teammates.  However, they have a short break a few weeks after spring break, and he asked to come home then.

 

FWIW, ds only lived on campus his freshman year.  At his school, it is typical for all others to live off-campus.

[snowbeltmom]

There are a large number of students who stay on campus at my son's school. Not only do the dorms remain open, but the dining halls serve Thanksgiving dinner.

[creekland]

My youngest has stayed at his college over Thanksgiving.  Both years he has gone with others to a friends house for a Thanksgiving dinner and movies, but for overnights, he's stayed on campus.  I know his college offered Thanksgiving Dinner for those who stayed last year.  Since he goes elsewhere for his dinner, I didn't check to see if they did the same this year.  I know a fair number of students stay - not the majority I don't think, but plenty.

 

Middle son's school also stays open over Thanksgiving.  He's always been with us though since we go up there to visit family.  Many of his friends stay on campus.  Sometimes they get together and make their own dinner.

 

Both schools have students who travel from far away to attend there.  There's no way all can afford to go home for such a short break.

 

Oldest always caught a ride home, but he also had a full week off if I recall correctly (it's been a few years now).  I'm not sure if his campus stayed open or not.

 

 

[ValRN]

Certain dorms/apartments on campus stayed open during Thanksgiving; however, the remainder of the campus (including the dining halls) was closed.

 

When DS left for college 2 and a half years ago, I instructed him to invite home for Thanksgiving as many friends as he desired because if the situation were reversed, I would want a friend to invite my son to his/her home for Thanksgiving. My DS came home for Thanksgiving and brought 3 friends with him. We live about 1.5 hours from campus.

[vonfirmath]

Most of the universities dd is considering are far away from home. The nearest of those, at this point, is about a 10-hour drive.

 

We've been factoring in flights/drives back/forth to each university as we're looking at costs. But, I've just been factoring, at minimum:

 

flight THERE in the fall

flight HOME at Christmas break

flight THERE after Christmas break

flight HOME after spring semester is over

perhaps one additional flight HOME and THERE again around Easter if she's feeling homesick (not too likely... and I bet her team will probably also be practicing over Easter break...)

 

(She'll be an athlete, and they always are "on" during Spring Break, so she won't be coming home then)

 

So, I obviously hadn't considered Thanksgiving at all. I'm thinking she should stay there and use that peaceful time to study, relax, have some quiet time before finals. Is that crazy? Does ANYONE stay? I was just at our state flagship over Thanksgiving break and it was a ghost town.

 

Some of the universities we're considering have nearby family, so she could go visit them for Thanksgiving Day, stay overnight, and head back (or, she could stay with them the entire break if she wanted...) - but others have no one there. The girls she's met while on official visits have insinuated that the way-out-of-state girls often go home with other girls on the short holiday weekends... but of course, there are no guarantees of that until she's there... living that life. lol

 

I stayed at school during Thanksgiving. But I hear many campuses close their dorms during thanksgiving now, so force the kids to leave!

 

[Carol in Cal.]

We never planned on DD coming home for Thanksgiving.  We figured on  Christmas and Easter breaks.  The flights are insane at Thanksgiving (O'Hare is a nightmare and San Jose is a very long way from there) and it's a very short break for all that hassle.  Thankfully she was not forced to clear out.  

 

Since their spring break did not coincide with Easter, we mutually agreed that she wouldn't come home for it.  However, they have an intersession in January so she was home for a whole month at Christmas.

[Granny_Weatherwax]

We didn't plan on it but we brought him home anyway.  It's a 10 hour drive for us but I have the time so it wasn't an inconvenience.  DS had the entire week off so bringing him home was worth the trip.  I don't know if we would have opted to bring him home if it would have been two or three days; probably not.

 

DS's school left the dorms open but all food service providers on campus were closed for the break.  Students on campus (and there were precious few) had to either eat out or cook in the microwave. 

 

Please don't rely on your student going home with a roommate and don't assume the roommate will be from the area.  DS's roommate's home state is further away from the school than ours.  Neither could have offered a quick trip home.

 

Here's my .02 = you know your student's personality better than anyone.  If she establishes friendships easily and would be able to find someone to take her home, plan on her staying at school.  If she is a bit more introverted and tends to be more family oriented, plan on saving for a ticket home.

[hopskipjump]

I am SO glad I asked! I'd assumed that since Thanksgiving is such a (relatively) short break that the dorms would be open. Now I know to check with each university's policies to even know what her options will be.

 

Dd's personality & sport should allow her to find friends pretty quickly, but I now know to not automatically discount Thanksgiving as a "must come home" time.

 

It just seemed like a lot of cost and hassle to come home for just a few days, go back to school for a couple weeks, then right back home again!

 

But, then, holidays have never been a "big deal" in our family. We have big, fancy meals at home when we feel like it, we give gifts when it pleases us (or when someone seems to need a perk-me-up), and our immediate family is TINY (and we generally avoid big family get togethers with extended family), so Thanksgiving is usually just US and my parents (who live about ten minutes away, lol) - so it's just another dinner, for the most part.

 

Add to that - I'm SURE she will REALLY need to be studying for finals... because her first round of finals, I predict, are going to be a serious wake-up call to her!!

 

It'd be 100% different if I thought dd would be homesick (and if she WERE, we'd bring her right home without question) - but she's not the homesick type, so I'd be really surprised (shocked) if that happened.

 

The 10-hour away school will be easy. The other schools are between 20-28 hour drives. So - her flying to us would be mandatory (the 10-hour school, WE would probably drive over to her, and stay at a cabin or hotel for the weekend as a family and then drive back home).

[allyphoe]

I never went home for Thanksgiving, nor did I have roommates who invited me home with them. (24+ hour drive each way, too poor for plane, bus would have been too slow to get me home and back, no train service.) Dorms were open but deserted, dining halls were closed. One year some administrative person arranged for those of us on campus to eat with local alumni, one year I was in an apartment so it was just a normal week, and the other years I got together with friends in the same situation. It was lonely but fine.

[Hoggirl]

I am late to this discussion because *we* went to visit ds for Thanksgiving! His dorms do stay open as does one dining hall.

 

We flew out on Thanksgiving Day (a relative bargain compared to flying out on Wednesday), and all three of us were invited to a Thanksgiving dinner at the home of a local family!! So VERY gracious and generous of them. I had thought there might be other "strays," but we were the only ones. Any disappointment ds had in not coming home was completely mitigated by his school's HUGE football win the Saturday after Thanksgiving. We all attended, and it was great fun. He does get off the entire week, but the traditional game that is always played the Saturday *before* Thanksgiving means he would never leave campus until the Sunday before Thanksgiving anyway. Yes, we are ALL big football fans. Attending a parents' weekend (which is held in February) is never going to jive well with my dh's work schedule, so we thought this was a good opportunity to visit.

 

We took four of his friends who had remained on campus out to dinner on Friday night. One was an international, one was from Hawaii, and one was from the East Coast. No one seemed worse for the wear because they hadn't gone home. The fourth was the local kid. They all had lots of school work (as was indicated on the other Thanksgiving thread) over the break. Ds worked hard to get the majority of his done before we arrived. We saw many students in the dining hall on Saturday morning.

 

I'm sure it is difficult not being able to see your children on Thanksgiving, but it is probably good training for the future. I visited with a friend just yesterday whose daughter was recently married, and the friend is struggling with "sharing" with her son-in-law's family. For better or worse, life changes once the children have left the nest.