I have the blahs.

[fairfarmhand]

We did our final performance for our drama production Friday. It was an amazing success.

 

We'll be off until January.

 

We're going to my inlaws for Tgiving this weekend. Not my favorite place to be. My family is coming next week and while I love them, it means lots of cleaning and cooking.

 

The holidays are always so busy and overwhelming with parties and traveling and shopping and planning, that I get swamped.

 

I just have lots of obligatory stuff for the next few weeks and not as much of the "I just LOVE this stuff" stuff going on, so i have the blahs.

 

I have lots to be thankful for, and LOTS to do, but still..

 

 

BLAH!

 

[Guest]

I think I'm right there with ya! I've got 90% of my Christmas shopping done and wrapped, so I'm happy about that. But my parents are coming in for an entire week this Saturday...and I've got a one bath/2bed house. So I need to rearrange furniture, determine which bedroom they will stay in, clean....yeah, definitely blah.

[Spryte]

I have the blahs, too.

[fairfarmhand]

Now that I  think about it, I think the upcoming holidays are my blah issue.

 

I really, really dislike the period of time between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don't mind Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but so much of what happens in that time period is obligatory.

 

It also doesn't help that my fil is dying and this will be his last holiday season. So that adds a lot more pressure to the "be happy and merry  because this is the last one we have with him." We've travelled so much this year because of this issue, and I am just tired.

 

Boy.

 

Do I sound whiny or what? :(

 

Ok. I need to buck up.

 

 

[SusanneA]

I'm brand new here and haven't even had time to post a profile, but your thread caught my attention and my empathy.

 

Holidays can be tough for many people for many reasons, not the least of which is the expectation we should make it the most joyous time of the year.

 

The problem is sometimes joy gets defined as "be as busy as possible, buy lots of gifts and put on perfectly hosted parties to ensure everyone has a wonderful time."

 

When you put aside what you love to do in favor of what you are expected and obligated to do, no wonder people feel blah. How does it help the world if the things we are gifted to do and passionate about have to get shoved to the back burner for several weeks of the year?

 

Is there some way you could work on your holiday preparations with the same mindset you use for one of your productions? How can you bring those skills into the holidays in such a way that would make your celebrations unique to you?

 

Sorry if I'm stepping out of line as a newbie. I'm a counselor. It's who I am.  :) 

[fairfarmhand]

I'm brand new here and haven't even had time to post a profile, but your thread caught my attention and my empathy.

 

Holidays can be tough for many people for many reasons, not the least of which is the expectation we should make it the most joyous time of the year.

 

The problem is sometimes joy gets defined as "be as busy as possible, buy lots of gifts and put on perfectly hosted parties to ensure everyone has a wonderful time."

 

When you put aside what you love to do in favor of what you are expected and obligated to do, no wonder people feel blah. How does it help the world if the things we are gifted to do and passionate about have to get shoved to the back burner for several weeks of the year?

 

Is there some way you could work on your holiday preparations with the same mindset you use for one of your productions? How can you bring those skills into the holidays in such a way that would make your celebrations unique to you?

 

Sorry if I'm stepping out of line as a newbie. I'm a counselor. It's who I am.  :)

 

You are not out of line at all.

 

(And welcome to the forums by the way)

 

I think my family would resent it if I were involved in more stuff during these weeks. I mean, I am the drama director, I could schedule whatever I want ;) But with all that our extended family expects and all that my husband wants for our family during Christmas (he really only tolerates my drama stuff because I am so passionate about that) there really is very little time for me to have another thing going during these weeks.

 

Our families live away from where we live, so it's a matter of travel to see them.

 

I'm in general a Scrooge about the holidays. I don't like the chaos. I love my routines. I don't like decorations. I dislike travel. My mom is in heaven. My dad is remarried and has his own life (I don't resent that) I look forward to Christmas eve and Christmas day when it's just my family here at the house. That's fun.

 

I'm just an old grouch. :) I'll get over it.

[Rosie_0801]

Do I sound whiny or what? :(

 

Nup!

[Garga]

I'm not sure how or why, but many of the interactions my immediately family has with certain extended family members end up being negative. 

 

For instance, just a couple of minutes ago the family member asked my kids, "Do you have a Christmas list?"  Seems like a safe question.

 

For some reason, this ruffled my kids' feathers.  "No.  It's not even Thanksgiving yet."  Disdainful looks at the relative.

 

Relative, "Well!  You need a list!  Or you'll get nothing!"  Way over-reaction. 

 

And everyone is unhappy.  I told my kids to knock of the disdainful looks, but I do understand why they get that way. The relative is judgy, so my kids get judgy back.  And it's the holiday season.  So we'll be seeing a lot of these relatives.  And my kids will be rolling their eyes and the relative will be harrumphing about everything and I'll just want to be at home with a good book.

[mamiof5]

Hope we can all push the blahs aside. I know it is a busy time of the year, and we all get overwhelmed and anxious, but it makes me sad when it just takes the joy from this wonderful season. My oldest daughter has leaned towards disliking Christmas time just because everyone is so grouchy, and she worked retail and some days came home crying, there were some very mean gals out there :(. I just hope we can set aside the blahs and put on our smilie faces and Santa hats (yes, I'm one of those who wears Santa hats ;)).

[prairiewindmomma]

And you've got a whole lotta stuff going on in the background of your life too.  

 

It's not like you're fussing because you're having to make 3 dozen cookies for a holiday party one week and then a work party where you have to dress up the next week.

 

It's the joy of homeschooling + caring for your immediate family + caring for family in a stressful situation + kid activities + holiday stress + family drama +....

 

Maybe this is the year where you do your shopping online and have it arrive on your doorstep? Maybe this is the year where you pick up your holiday treats from the store (like a lotta other people do)? Maybe this is your sabbatical year from some of the traditions---find at least one joyful thing to throw into your life---even if it's just a good candlelight takeout meal with dh+ a new cd of holiday music + two hours to yourselves...

[MomtoCandJ]

I get the financial blahs because not only is there Christmas but 3 birthdays, dd1 is on thanksgiving this year, dh is the 12 days before Christmas and dd2's is less than a month after Christmas. I should have planned birthdays better (though I am glad dd1 wasn't born on her due date of 12/6)

[fairfarmhand]

I get the financial blahs because not only is there Christmas but 3 birthdays, dd1 is on thanksgiving this year, dh is the 12 days before Christmas and dd2's is less than a month after Christmas. I should have planned birthdays better (though I am glad dd1 wasn't born on her due date of 12/6)

 

I should've planned birthdays better too.

 

(Ah, I'd forgotten about this part of my blahs)

 

My dd17's bday is 12/1

My ds7's bday is 12/11

and my dd13's bday is 1/7

 

What terrible birthdays. I try to make it special for them, cause it wasn't their fault. But still, that's one (no...three) more things to plan.

 

And I don't like planning birthday parties. I have birthday party baggage from when I was a kid and I had 3 birthday parties where NOBODY showed up!

 

I was a quiet, introverted kid without many friends. I  was actually relieved when my mom stopped asking if I wanted a party.

[Tree Frog]

Now that I  think about it, I think the upcoming holidays are my blah issue.

 

I really, really dislike the period of time between Thanksgiving and Christmas. I don't mind Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but so much of what happens in that time period is obligatory.

 

It also doesn't help that my fil is dying and this will be his last holiday season. So that adds a lot more pressure to the "be happy and merry  because this is the last one we have with him." We've travelled so much this year because of this issue, and I am just tired.

 

Boy.

 

Do I sound whiny or what? :(

 

Ok. I need to buck up.

 

This is where we are, except we're not sure MIL will make it through the holidays. We've had company every other week (staying several days or a week each time) since the beginning of September, all out to visit her and say their goodbyes. We had one 2 week break with no company and it was bliss! I've declared December a "no guests" month, but, of course, if anyone else wants to visit MIL, we'd be glad to have them stay here (and have them leave again!) How could we say no?  OP, I understand your tiredness!

[SusanneA]

okay, so, it seems pretty clear a lot of people don't enjoy the holidays (myself included) for various reasons. I've been thinking about it and here's my thought, for your consideration:

 

Everyone is here on earth for a reason. Our lives have meaning. The meaning of our life is found in the message we have inside of us that we are meant to share with the world. What if we went into this season focused on how we can share our message with the people who cross our paths over the next 6 weeks?

 

For example, if your message is about mentoring your children on how to live an unselfish, generous life, what could you do to model that character trait and help to nurture it in your children?

 

Maybe the message and meaning of your life at this time is about giving your children more opportunities to explore the world. What could you do to bring more multi-cultural awareness into the holidays?

 

I'm just speculating and playing with ideas here. The thought is if we can identify our life message and concentrate on sharing that message, all the time, regardless of the time of year or the situation around us, we would be enriching the world with our gifts and finding fulfillment in our lives. (and maybe the chaos of Christmas wouldn't seem like a big deal  :)  )