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Kinsa

What are you hearing locally about the Ashley Madison fallout?

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Don't get me wrong, I totally agree that the spouse/significant other has a right to know! But I just cannot get behind mass extortion/intimidation. Every single one of us has details on the web we wouldn't want to learn went public--medical details, credit card info, heck, even a history of the searches run from my devices! I have googled so many dodgy things just out of curiousity of things I encountered here in the hive😄

This group took a stand because they wanted AM closed down. What about the next group?

 

Yes!!!  I never want people to actually see my search list on Google...Or my You Tube viewing list (ahhh insomnia, my friend)...I think this was the absolute wrong way to protest a website.  If it doesn't come back, someone will make a site similar to it to fill in the gap.  It has done nothing except expose a bunch of people, some who may have not been married and just looking for something for fun.  I can't imagine the world knowing all my deep dark desires because someone wanted to protest a website.

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Google Josh Duggar instead; it'll get you up to speed.

Oh god. I want to search for Duggers even less.

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I get my news here.  It might not be the most socially responsible action but it keeps my stress levels low. 

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Alright. I bit the bullet and googled AM.

 

So....

 

A. yet another company claiming a secure site with secure storage or no storage was hacked to crap and proven that in actuality they pretty much didn't do a dang thing to protect data aside from encrypting (which is scarily more than most) and they did not in fact trash any of the date the accumulated?

 

And

 

B. Oh and they basicly run a modern whore house online? I think it's a sad statement of society, but it's not really relavent either.

 

Cry me a river.

 

*stands on soapbox*

 

The complete lack of privacy being protected in our society is a serious problem and as long as big money gets to keep their share, they don't seem to care about the data info being hacked, stolen, or misused. And it's all those clients who get screwed by it. It doesn't matter if it's the IRS, your local hospital, or Target. They don't seem to suffer anything for the damage they inflict on their clients by the lack of security. Clients suffer the financial nightmare for years with little or no justice for it. And in the mean time, the average joe in our society really doesn't have much say in where his information goes or what happens to it. And we aren't given much say in whether we even want to give it. Sure in this case those people did, but there's many others where we don't.

 

I think extremely harsh financial and other legal penalties for failure to have secure sites and to disclose data collection are called for. And I'd be okay with something similiar to the IRS to evaluate and sanction such. The penalties should be so harsh that these companies start investing in some major security efforts to avoid them. The lack of willingness to invest in security is a big problem. They play Russian roulette with client data figuring the cost of security now against a possible cost of PR repair later is very worth it. And currently, it is. We need to change that attitude.

 

And sure, hackers, activitist or not, should face justice too.

 

I'm curious to know if what these hackers disclosed is illegal to disclose. Yes, blackmail and hacking is illegal. I'm not talking about that.

 

But is it illegal to post a list of names and address and emails with 4 digit numbers that might or might not be attached to a credit card? Truth be known, I don't think that's illegal to disclose. At least half of it is usually publicly documented somewhere. Possibly emails too. The only question is really the credit card digits, if that's what they are. And since it's only the last 4, I think they are skimming by there too. Heck the local gas station recept prints the last 4 digits of my credit card. If I forgot it in the print off and the guy behind me pulled up and decided he was going to shop the gas station chain that he thinks they need to quit printing receipt. So he posted online:

My vehicle and tag and the last four digits of my credit card

Would he be committing a criminal act?

 

Idk. I'm guessing... No?

He didn't use my identity or try to access my accounts.

He didn't blackmail me.

 

We might question his methods, but would it be illegal?

 

Now, I know that hacking data is illegal. So I'm not arguing that point.

 

But it does yet again illustrate how companies using data are more protected than the people whose data they are taking, yet it's those same people who suffer the repercussions for it.

 

*off soapbox*

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I get my news here. It might not be the most socially responsible action but it keeps my stress levels low.

I have managed to mostly center my "news" around knitting patterns, gardening, and reading the Dresden series.

 

I rarely turn on the tv during the week and I might listen to the news on the radio in the van while driving everyone all over the place. But like everything else in van, the radio is iffy on whether it will actually work at any particuliar time. I so identify with Dredsen and his blue beetle. Yes, when it rains a bit of water leaks in. That's why we keep a beach towel under that seat. Yes, if I press the wind shield washer button it makes all the lights on the dash flicker on and off as the wipers go. Yes, we can't open one of the doors in the back and we can open another but can't shut it unless a teen or adult kicks it shut really hard. But by golly it is MY Baby Van and it is paid off, so I'm keeping it!

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I for one am appreciative of the hack in many ways (and I'm not generally a fan of malicious hacking and cracking), not the least of which is once again ruining the illusion that data online is private. It isn't. It's only as good as the encryption someone places on it, and even then as it is transferred and processed it only takes one weak link in the system. We run servers that handle credit card data so this is something we care about very much. Privacy is serious and isn't easy to ensure, and too many individuals think they're safe and anonymous.

 

Knowing the potential flaws in a system helps you plug them. Knowing you may well be at risk helps you manage expectations. Believing data 'should' be secure begs the question - how can a data driven, transactional system be secured? What's 'enough'? Arguments on this vary wildly, depending on which geek you ask. But consumers need to realize that their online identities are as good as public and their credit cards are no more secure than how much the person being given the information wants them to be.

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I had never even heard of AM until I stumbled upon this thread last night. I have not heard another thing anywhere but this is not surprising as I work into the night and rarely listen to local radio nowadays.

 

I cannot feel sorry for the cheaters or would-be cheaters but it highlights that anything we do online is public.

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I think extremely harsh financial and other legal penalties for failure to have secure sites and to disclose data collection are called for. And I'd be okay with something similiar to the IRS to evaluate and sanction such. The penalties should be so harsh that these companies start investing in some major security efforts to avoid them. The lack of willingness to invest in security is a big problem. They play Russian roulette with client data figuring the cost of security now against a possible cost of PR repair later is very worth it. And currently, it is. We need to change that attitude.

 

And sure, hackers, activitist or not, should face justice too.

 

 

 

I do mostly agree with you. :) I think the hackers chose their target well. Very few people are going to feel sorry for a bunch of cheaters. Most people are going to laugh that they're getting what they deserve. If they had hacked the private information of an STD clinic or adoption agency, then yes, people would be much more upset and angry with the hackers. In this case, it seems like we're mostly not focusing on that part because it's such salacious information and we don't sympathize the victims of the hack. Only the victims of the victims of the hack (wronged husbands and wives).

 

It seems like no matter what your security is like, someone will figure out a way through it. :( But businesses should need to prove that they did all they could to protect their clients when they were hacked.

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It seems like no matter what your security is like, someone will figure out a way through it. :( But businesses should need to prove that they did all they could to protect their clients when they were hacked.

 

This is so incredibly true.  OPM was hacked recently.  Know what OPM is?  Office of Personnel Management for the Federal Government.  Identifying and possibly sensitive information was revealed for thousands of federal employees.  Part of my husband's job is security.  Do you know how hard it is to truly secure anything on a computer?  Darn near impossible.

 

This is why I worry about electronic medical records.  *Nothing* on a computer is 100% secure or immune from an attack if it is attached to any other computer.

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This is so incredibly true. OPM was hacked recently. Know what OPM is? Office of Personnel Management for the Federal Government. Identifying and possibly sensitive information was revealed for thousands of federal employees. Part of my husband's job is security. Do you know how hard it is to truly secure anything on a computer? Darn near impossible.

 

This is why I worry about electronic medical records. *Nothing* on a computer is 100% secure or immune from an attack if it is attached to any other computer.

This is not entirely true though.

 

For example, not keeping data (as AM claimed they would not do) is certainly a simple step. People can't steal what you don't have. Well, not anywhere near as easily anyways.

 

And yes, if someone is determined enough and invested enough, they can get through any security.

 

But the problem is not those few who could get through anything if given enough time and resources.

 

The problem is how scary little ANY genuine effort is put into the security at all. They talk like there is, but truth is there is very little done. And it's crazy how easy it would be for even an amateur to access a treasure trove of data.

 

And I heartily agree with you about medical. I'm really ticked off that our local hospitals have switched entirely over to epic and there is no option to opt out. None. All your info is available to anyone at any time if they can access any of the medical system computers. They talk about how secure it is but its 100% a load of BS. The only person who can't easily access it? The patient. Oh they can access their bill and a very limited patient record and pay it, but that's about it. It's crazy.

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Not sure what I think of this.  First of all, I don't think the site should have existed in the first place.  How the hell can we, on the one hand, act like marriage is so important in all this fuss about marriage equality (for or against) and then have various totally legal constructs whose sole purpose is to attack the sanctity of marriage?  What is marriage anyway?  If most of those accounts are real, that is a large % of marriages that are not for real, and that is probably only the tip of the iceberg, assuming most cheaters find other ways to cheat.

 

Feeling sorry for the cheaters who were exposed?  No.  But I do feel sorry for their spouses and kids.  Because of the cheating, and because of the public humiliation.  Gross.  Whom to blame for that?  AM first of all because if it hadn't existed, if it hadn't gathered all that info, we wouldn't be having this discussion.  The cheaters of course.  The hackers, yeah, because what they did was crude and heartless to the victims.  Though I can understand their wanting the site shut down.  And if this results in a mass exodus from similar online dating sites, porn sites, etc., that is probably not a bad thing.

 

On the other hand, the cyber security issues should concern everyone.  I do some online transactions, and every time I enter my info I wonder if it's going to come back to bite me this time.  Of course I am not stupid enough to buy anything online that I wouldn't want publicized.  But still.  The internet feels more and more like a creepy place.

 

All that said, I don't consider extramarital affairs of common citizens to be newsworthy.  It's nothing new, it's hardly uncommon, and it's probably never going away.  If the news reported every guy who cheated on his wife, well, it would be all they reported all day long.  It serves no societal purpose.  It's a personal marital issue to be handled in private IMO.

 

To answer the question in the OP, the local news so far hasn't said anything about local people being on the list.  I assume they have decided it isn't worth reporting on, or possibly they are still sifting it to see if they can trash any prominent people.  :/  Or maybe they themselves are on the list.  :P

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A couple of guys at my brother's place of work are going down for using company credit cards to AM subscriptions.

 

You can't cure stupid! It does however beg the question, "Is anyone paying attention to what employees do with company issued credit cards?"

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A couple of guys at my brother's place of work are going down for using company credit cards to AM subscriptions.

 

You can't cure stupid! It does however beg the question, "Is anyone paying attention to what employees do with company issued credit cards?"

Wow. A company that will still issue company credit cards. My dh hasn't had that luxury in .... At least 6 years. And jerks like that is one of the reasons.

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Wow. A company that will still issue company credit cards. My dh hasn't had that luxury in .... At least 6 years. And jerks like that is one of the reasons.

Yeah, they changed the reimbursement policy at the state for the same reason - abuse of the system. So then I have to try and find several thousand dollars for trips and be reimbursed through receipts rather than them issuing a card for all charges and checking them later. It wouldn't be a big deal except we don't have multiple grand laying around at any given point!

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Wow. A company that will still issue company credit cards. My dh hasn't had that luxury in .... At least 6 years. And jerks like that is one of the reasons.

I know! Dh has to use his own and submit an expense report. Dear brother said that the employees revolted because accounts payable was taking three months to pay so the employees were eating the interest. Not cool! The entire sales rep staff refused to travel anymore. So I guess they will probably pull the cqrds, but if they can't get their accounting house in order, my guess is another employee revolt.

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Yeah, they changed the reimbursement policy at the state for the same reason - abuse of the system. So then I have to try and find several thousand dollars for trips and be reimbursed through receipts rather than them issuing a card for all charges and checking them later.

 

Yup, same issue for DH. You have to pay for company-mandated travel out of pocket and then ask them to reimburse you when you get back, and wait until they get around to it. :toetap05:

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I know! Dh has to use his own and submit an expense report. Dear brother said that the employees revolted because accounts payable was taking three months to pay so the employees were eating the interest. Not cool! The entire sales rep staff refused to travel anymore. So I guess they will probably pull the cqrds, but if they can't get their accounting house in order, my guess is another employee revolt.

Typical and sucky. I received my last travel reimbursement a week before the next quarterly board meeting. So three month lag, or thereabouts. That was about three grand outstanding and we had bills to pay.

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One thing to be aware of with the AM story is that the site apparently didn't verify email addresses.  So someone could enter an email address that was not their own (or a fake, more likely) and use that to get into the site.  Or so I've been told,anyway.

 

So a lot of .gov email accounts and accounts with schools and whatnot might not be what they seem to be.

 

Credit card info, though, will likely trace back to a source that's at least close to the actual user -- whether their actual card or one they stole or"used".

 

 

 

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I do question if the significant others of these cheaters are really going to have their lives improved by this public exposure.

 

If I were in that position, I'd rather I found out about it with a lot less public awareness.  Otoh, maybe being part of a large group finding out at once has some sort of hide in the crowd benefit.

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Typical and sucky. I received my last travel reimbursement a week before the next quarterly board meeting. So three month lag, or thereabouts. That was about three grand outstanding and we had bills to pay.

To be honest, it should be against the law. It an abuse of the employee, a real racket. There should be a labor law that states the employee cannot be required to pay company expenses with a personal credit card unless the company guarantees repayment within ten business days of receiving the expense report, and very stiff penalties attached for failure to comply.

 

I am so sick of how corporate America treats people!

 

That said, my brother reported that these guys wives have already booted them to the curb, so the loss of jobs for their stupidity is going to be an extra sticky wicket because the courts will award the moms a good amount of child support based on 2014 taxes and if these men can't pay it, they can be jailed for it. They better hope their mistresses take them in because if they can't find work that pays as much as they were making, they will be toast! I have no sympathy though. As the saying goes, if you want to dance, you have to pay the fiddler.

 

The only goods that I can think of that might emanate from this mass dump are a serious national discussion about internet security, and maybe some support for spouses in locales where there were numerous offenders. Many times the spouse cheated on feels so alone and other friends, epecially happily married ones, can not relate no matter how helpful they want to be. Possibly this could spearhead some community support groups.

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I know. And I want to agree with you, but I can't help but think if this group felt like they could do this to AM users, what happens if they don't like homeschoolers or LGBT people etc? If AM users are fine, then who else is fine. When does it stop being entertaining to us? Who else is on their list off groups they don't like? OK Cupid users? Women who have prescription birth control? If they doxxed everyone who uses Rainbow Resources it would make life very difficult for a lot of us.

 

And I am a bit sensitive b/c doxxing is so often done to women who stand up for themselves, or just, you know, speak in public.

 

I can see your point, except expose me as a homeschool mom? Expose how many kids I have or that I don't use birth control?

 

Maybe I don't understand what doxxing actually is? I thought it was online exposure? If that's so then I wonder how many of us have major unethical things currently going on in our lives we're scared will be exposed? I can't think that many.... These men, and I guess, women, were lying to their spouses and kids, chatting, stealing from family finances, and did it because, frankly they thought there were NO consequences. There are always consequences yo every choice and every action and you better be willing to pay to play. They played. They lost.

 

But you know what sucks? Public humiliation for the spouses.... they've been duped, tricked, cheated on, treated like fools. The kids who are the emotional wreckage of these ended divorces? Can you even imagine what these kids are hearing in their homes? It just sinks. My husband is flabbergasted that a website could even be this popular, said surely cheating on your spouse cannot be this common?! I have to agree but we come from families with legacies of long marriages do this is really weird.

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Nothing locally.

 

But honestly, I can't understand all the hoopla about it.  

 

We've all long known that AM existed.  The first time I saw it, it raised my eyebrows a bit, sure.  But people act as though it's a really huge deal - people in the government discovered in the AM hack! --- seriously?  Tell me why their personal life is ANYONE'S business!  Or why their sex life has any bearing on their ability to do their job?  SMH.

 

I actually DO feel bad that these people have been exposed in this way.  For the person themselves, and yeah, for the family, too.  Because it's NOT helpful at all for things to be publicly exposed.  Let's not be naive and assume that a lot of these spouses didn't know already anyway... I wouldn't be surprised if they did know and just chose to look the other way for various reasons.  But now that it's a public debacle, it makes everything way more complicated.

 

Idk, overall I find the whole thing sort of annoying.  I didn't realize MW had weighed in on the whole thing, but I'm not surprised... he's clickbait-y anyway.  :rolleyes:

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My husband works for a large company and there are a handful of work email addresses that have been identified. Not sure what the fallout will be. Will depend on what was actually accessed using a work computer I guess. I am not surprised by the cheating. I have seen that enough even in homeschool circles, amongst ball team parents, etc that I believe it to be rampant. I am kind of shocked so many people used this site. From the amount of adultery I see I would not think most people would need to pay to use the site. Doesn't seem that hard to have an affair. ???? I think if my dh was exposed the stupidity of using the site and risking public exposure would be a huge issue for me to get past even separate from the cheating.

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I can see your point, except expose me as a homeschool mom? Expose how many kids I have or that I don't use birth control? How many of us have major unethical things currently going on in our lives we're scared will be exposed? I can't think that many.... These men, and I guess, women, were lying to their spouses and kids, chatting, stealing from family finances, and did it because, frankly they thought there were NO consequences. There are always consequences yo every choice and every action and you better be willing to pay to play. They played. They lost.

 

But you know what sucks? Public humiliation for the spouses.... they've been duped, tricked, cheated on, treated like a fool. The kids who are the emotional wreckage of these ended divorces? Can you even imagine what these kids are hearing in their homes? It just sinks. My husband is flabbergasted that a website could even be this popular, said surely creating on your spouse cannot be this common?! I have to agree but we come from families with legacies of long marriages do this is really weird.

 

Even though I have nothing to hide from the police, I still don't support unfettered access to my personal life.  

 

If things turned to the point where homeschoolers were targeted, I can definitely see the thinking moving along the lines of...

 

OK, so sure, you may not be looking at porn, you may not be searching 'how to make a fertilizer bomb,' but just how much time ARE you spending online when you're supposedly 'educating' your children at home? Oh, yes, we know how much, and we don't approve.  We can't be sure your children are being educated while you're checking Facebook... how many times?  Shocking! And can you prove that those worksheets you downloaded were completed by your children or that they actually viewed and understood the videos you played?  Oh, you didn't keep them, and you 'discussed' the videos ... riiiiiight.  You know, society has a vested interest in making sure its citizens receive a proper education, after all.  Did you know that such-and-so curriculum we see you purchased on such-and-so date has such-and-so connections to such-and-so, an entity where one person on the board was said to hold such-and-so views?  You've supported such-and-so awful views!  Oh, you didn't know? Well, you admit your ignorance... and you consider yourself fit to TEACH?  Really, what more is there to say?   

 

In other words, things can be easily twisted when people want to achieve a certain end.  

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We've all long known that AM existed.  The first time I saw it, it raised my eyebrows a bit, sure.  But people act as though it's a really huge deal - people in the government discovered in the AM hack! --- seriously?  Tell me why their personal life is ANYONE'S business!  Or why their sex life has any bearing on their ability to do their job?  SMH.

 

We "all" haven't known all along AM exists.  I didn't know it existed until the news broke they had been hacked.

 

As for people in high places being discovered in the hack, the fact they had accounts is meh.  It's between them and their wives.  The problem is many of these men used their work computers and were on AM during working hours.  *That* is what affects their ability to do their job and is why they can be fired.  For most positions (military is a grey area since they have their own adultery rules), just being on the site doesn't matter and will not result in being fired.

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So slightly off topic, but the possibility of all those unsuspecting spouses being exposed to sexually transmitted diseases is frightening and sad. This article came through my ScienceDaily feed and I had to share. It is a ring that goes on a finger or thumb and within minutes diagnoses some STDs, sending the info to a smart phone. Obviously it is in the initial stages, but I hope it becomes mainstream...as in selling them eventually in gas stations along side the condoms!

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/08/150821172213.htm

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I know! Dh has to use his own and submit an expense report. Dear brother said that the employees revolted because accounts payable was taking three months to pay so the employees were eating the interest. Not cool! The entire sales rep staff refused to travel anymore. So I guess they will probably pull the cqrds, but if they can't get their accounting house in order, my guess is another employee revolt.

We had the same issue and it was awful and stressful. Employees didn't revolt. They just didn't have the finances to do it and couldn't go, so the company would just hire someone else. It was one of the reasons so many companies started contracting out the positions. And also why so many of them have trouble keeping to their deadlines.

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I wanted to like your last post Martha, but I have whored out my likes again and can't, sniff sniff....

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I wonder what percentage of AM users actually had physical affairs?? No way to know but I bet it is pretty low due to the lack of women on the site.

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I can see your point, except expose me as a homeschool mom? Expose how many kids I have or that I don't use birth control?

 

Maybe I don't understand what doxxing actually is? I thought it was online exposure? If that's so then I wonder how many of us have major unethical things currently going on in our lives we're scared will be exposed? I can't think that many.... These men, and I guess, women, were lying to their spouses and kids, chatting, stealing from family finances, and did it because, frankly they thought there were NO consequences. There are always consequences yo every choice and every action and you better be willing to pay to play. They played. They lost.

 

But you know what sucks? Public humiliation for the spouses.... they've been duped, tricked, cheated on, treated like fools. The kids who are the emotional wreckage of these ended divorces? Can you even imagine what these kids are hearing in their homes? It just sinks. My husband is flabbergasted that a website could even be this popular, said surely cheating on your spouse cannot be this common?! I have to agree but we come from families with legacies of long marriages do this is really weird.

 

Doxing can entail a few things. Mostly it involves publishing personal information about a person on the internet, generally for malicious intent. For example, when the actress Felicia Day spoke out about sexual harassment in the gamer world, something she had personal experience with, it took about 5 mins for her home address and a whole host of other very personal information to be posted across several sites. Other women have have been doxxed and gotten emails from people claiming to be sitting outside their house and describing their children.  Why? Because someone didn't agree with them. A good hacker with a bad attitude can find an amazing amount of information about someone by looking across different records etc. 

 

But with something like 'exposing you as a homeschooler' it would be more like (and this is not my opinion, ok?) some minor figure like Bill Maher makes one of his snarky comments about inbred bible thumping homeschoolers whose kids are so stupid we are all better off not having them in the school system. And, hey, they may breed like nymphomaniacial rabbits, but at least they are bone ignorant so the rest of us are safe.  Then some fanboy hackers on some sub redit decide that homeschoolers are just the worst. One of them comes across the Rainbow site and thinks its a total hoot. They spend a couple days posting descriptions of some of the more choice anti-evolution or character education offerings and then they get bored and decide to hack (or one of them does...I am not sure this is all that organized) and post whatever information that Rainbow keeps about its customers.  Credit card numbers, home addresses, names, phone numbers, email addresses and account passwords.  They are telling the sewer dwellers of the internet to have at us.

 

Even just getting a rainbow account password and an email address can be very damaging.  So many people use the same passwords across accounts that getting access to one account almost guarantees access to a host of others.  And all they have to do is read your email to find out where else you do business.  Now they know where your husband works and who your parents are, where you go to church.  How much fun for them. They won't get into everyone's email, but they will get enough to have work with.

 

You start getting disgusting emails with graphic threats or your facebook gets hacked and disgusting things are sent out under your name. Maybe your husband's place of work also gets hacked. Maybe your church. Maybe your mom suddenly has to spend all her time on the phone because someone has taken out a credit card in her name.  These people know where you live and some of them might not be far away.  And they seem to have an endless supply of free time.  Plus, if you are worried about identity theft now, imagine if you've been doxxed? It will never end and cost you a lot of time and money to deal with.

 

Now imagine if there are thousands of us dealing with this all at once. 

 

So, you know, off the top of my head, before coffee, that is how it could be bad to be a doxxed homeschooer. I can't imagine how it is going to help the mostly women who are finding out the hard way that their husbands have been paying a whole lot of money to find a f%^& buddy.

 

This particular group of hackers has said that it has done this from a sense of moral outrage.  Ok, I get that. But just how much outrage do they have? Are they dangerous? They have decided they are judge and jury...anyone out there also feeling like executioner? Or blackmailer? On this thread we have heard of one suicide and a number of firings.  The hack isn't done yet, there was another major release on, I think Wednesday. What else is to come?  Who else is next on their list?

 

So, it is titliating, and I absolutely admit to some schadenfreude when it comes to outing hypocritical idiots who wrap themselves in the "family values" flag while they spend all their free time reading nasty websites and typing with their left hand.  But doxing isn't a joke and as a tactic shouldn't be taken lightly. It is a big deal for anyone. It isn't an issue of 'I'm not doing anything wrong so who cares who sees' but an issue of personal safety.

 

I can separate the two issues. I am not defending the users of AM in any way. I am just trying to draw attention to realities of this tactic and also express my concerns about the group behind this.  All I have heard is that they are Canadian and they don't like adultery. But, what if they announced they were some...I dunno... some Taliban group, or ISIS, or a tool of the Kremlin, trying to point out the hypocrisy of the morally corrupt west. The result would be the same. They aren't, as far as we know, but would that still make this a tabloid story?

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Here's the thing though. Most of the users are men. Many of the account profiles for women are fake and for "entertainment" purposes.

 

I don't doubt that there are many men on that site who, despite their intention in signing up, have never actually had a physical affair. It's seems to me that if one is signing up, they probably for whatever reason are less able to go out and find a hookup IRL and the site seems like it wouldn't really work for most men just due to the sheer lack of women compared to men.

 

So a lot of the people exposed were really just curious and signed up.

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The complete lack of privacy being protected in our society is a serious problem and as long as big money gets to keep their share, they don't seem to care about the data info being hacked, stolen, or misused. And it's all those clients who get screwed by it. It doesn't matter if it's the IRS, your local hospital, or Target. They don't seem to suffer anything for the damage they inflict on their clients by the lack of security. Clients suffer the financial nightmare for years with little or no justice for it. And in the mean time, the average joe in our society really doesn't have much say in where his information goes or what happens to it. And we aren't given much say in whether we even want to give it. Sure in this case those people did, but there's many others where we don't.

 

This is the brunt of what I hear about AM. This site was chosen as an example because the people exposed would likely not procure much sympathy. Exposing the lack of online security (both the company, and the people using it) was the real purpose of the hack. A nasty way to make a point, but an important point to make. 

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Albeto, I pimped my likes but wanted you to know I also feel like this is the Dodge City of cyberland.

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Stats posted from Carolina sources...

 

 

charleston.af.mil x 4

charleston-sc.gov x 1

dhec.sc.gov x 1

ed.sc.gov x 1

greenwoodsc.gov x 2

grucharleston.uscg.mil x 2

jaspercountysc.gov x 1

nesucharleston.uscg.mil x 1

sc.gov x 1

spawar.navy.mil x 5

 

Plus work emails from 15 South Carolina school districts.

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Stats posted from Carolina sources...

 

 

charleston.af.mil x 4

charleston-sc.gov x 1

dhec.sc.gov x 1

ed.sc.gov x 1

greenwoodsc.gov x 2

grucharleston.uscg.mil x 2

jaspercountysc.gov x 1

nesucharleston.uscg.mil x 1

sc.gov x 1

spawar.navy.mil x 5

 

Plus work emails from 15 South Carolina school districts.

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Albeto, I pimped my likes but wanted you to know I also feel like this is the Dodge City of cyberland.

 

ha, I edited my post because I thought it sounded too choppy. My brain thinks like A-B-C-K-Squirrel!-Elemenopee. And I go back and read what I wrote and I look at the computer quizzically and think, :huh:

 

But yeah, I feel like we're in the Wild Wild Cyber West where people with the biggest guns decide the law. I hope all this mess gets sorted out before too long (imagining it will take a generation, at least).

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Here's the thing though. Most of the users are men. Many of the account profiles for women are fake and for "entertainment" purposes.

 

I don't doubt that there are many men on that site who, despite their intention in signing up, have never actually had a physical affair. It's seems to me that if one is signing up, they probably for whatever reason are less able to go out and find a hookup IRL and the site seems like it wouldn't really work for most men just due to the sheer lack of women compared to men.

 

So a lot of the people exposed were really just curious and signed up.

 

my thoughts exactly.  That is why I was lol at the idea that I should check to see if my dh was on the list. I don't see it as an insinuation about my marriage, but my dh's intelligence. If he wants some outside action he's smart enough not to go about it like that.

 

I also had to explain what AM was to him so... (he's so cute when he's shocked :lol: ) His first question was, "why would anyone think a site like that would actually have any women on it."  Of course, now that I think of it, maybe if some of these men spend a little time re-educating themselves about women, they would have had more fulfilling personal relationships.

 

 

I am guessing that this was more of a scam on the part of AM. I am betting that a whole lot of men were catfished into keeping those accounts open on the promise of meeting a real live girl.  Now THAT would have been a very worthwhile thing to uncover: take down the owners of AM for perpetuating a fraud. I am not saying these men are not their own victims, far from it.

 

I guess in the future these guys will stick to Craig's list and driving to bars two towns over from home. 

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my thoughts exactly. That is why I was lol at the idea that I should check to see if my dh was on the list. I don't see it as an insinuation about my marriage, but my dh's intelligence. If he wants some outside action he's smart enough not to go about it like that.

 

I also had to explain what AM was to him so... (he's so cute when he's shocked :lol: ) His first question was, "why would anyone think a site like that would actually have any women on it." Of course, now that I think of it, maybe if some of these men spend a little time re-educating themselves about women, they would have had more fulfilling personal relationships.

 

 

I am guessing that this was more of a scam on the part of AM. I am betting that a whole lot of men were catfished into keeping those accounts open on the promise of meeting a real live girl. Now THAT would have been a very worthwhile thing to uncover: take down the owners of AM for perpetuating a fraud. I am not saying these men are not their own victims, far from it.

 

I guess in the future these guys will stick to Craig's list and driving to bars two towns over from home.

I think this is very probable. But I also think that in some locales with vibrant, sophisticated escort services, it may have been a means of paying for sex. The average dude in the middle of say, North Dakota probably was never going to have a chance at a physical affair, however Washington D.C., Miami,....I think it is very possible some of those guys hooked up with prostitutes.

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I think this is very probable. But I also think that in some locales with vibrant, sophisticated escort services, it may have been a means of paying for sex. The average dude in the middle of say, North Dakota probably was never going to have a chance at a physical affair, however Washington D.C., Miami,....I think it is very possible some of those guys hooked up with prostitutes.

Um, there aren't any states without prostitutes. Men in North Dakota who want to pay for it can find it.

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True, I can definitely see accessing the site from a work computer being a problem.  (Though, if it's anything like our work computers, it should be pretty easy to just block the site and take disciplinary action against those who were on it while at work.)

 

I guess overall I just feel like it's a terrible thing, what happened.  No one deserves to have their private life subjected to public humiliation.  It doesn't matter whether they have 'something to hide' in the traditional sense or not.  

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*pulls out the miniature violins and plays Cry Me A River*

 

Nope, do not feel sorry for a bunch of cheaters. Not at all. Public humiliation is the natural consequence of their stupidity.

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True, I can definitely see accessing the site from a work computer being a problem. 

 

 

I think there's a more widely-applicable issue here about work email vs. personal email, and how many emails one should have, and when to use each. As the first generation to be expected to use email for everything, I don't know that we've come up with the right answers to these questions. (Maybe this should be a spin-off).

 

I happen to know several lawyers socially, and I'm shocked that all of them always seem to use their work email (complete with automatically inserted disclosure statements at the bottom of each email) for personal stuff.  Now, I'm not worried that my emails about carpooling or birthday parties or playdates are falling into the wrong hands, but it seems odd to be sending these to their work email address. Maybe this is a policy the firms have to prevent business related email from accidentally going into personal email?

 

On the other hand, I see professionals frequently on their phones or laptops, doing work-related email off hours, while waiting to pick up kids, and during other down time.  If your employer expects you to be available via email at all hours, that encourages a mixing of personal and business uses. 

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I think there's a more widely-applicable issue here about work email vs. personal email, and how many emails one should have, and when to use each. As the first generation to be expected to use email for everything, I don't know that we've come up with the right answers to these questions. (Maybe this should be a spin-off).

 

I happen to know several lawyers socially, and I'm shocked that all of them always seem to use their work email (complete with automatically inserted disclosure statements at the bottom of each email) for personal stuff.  Now, I'm not worried that my emails about carpooling or birthday parties or playdates are falling into the wrong hands, but it seems odd to be sending these to their work email address. Maybe this is a policy the firms have to prevent business related email from accidentally going into personal email?

 

On the other hand, I see professionals frequently on their phones or laptops, doing work-related email off hours, while waiting to pick up kids, and during other down time.  If your employer expects you to be available via email at all hours, that encourages a mixing of personal and business uses. 

 

This is a college town. They are the biggest employer in the town so lots of families have at least one person who works there..and they all use their work address for everything.

 

 

DH tried for a little while to have a separate account but found it too difficult. However, I have noticed that in the past couple years, his  Facebook account gets used for the bulk of personal communication. There is some work communication on Facebook as well, but not a lot.  Plus, lots of younger people I know don't use email much for personal communication any more. My son doesn't see the point of an email account to communicate with friends when he can just text him. His email is how his school teachers communicate with him, so it feels like work to him, lol. So, the issue might die a natural death...but it will take a long time.

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Yup, same issue for DH. You have to pay for company-mandated travel out of pocket and then ask them to reimburse you when you get back, and wait until they get around to it. :toetap05:

How is this legal?

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*pulls out the miniature violins and plays Cry Me A River*

 

Nope, do not feel sorry for a bunch of cheaters. Not at all. Public humiliation is the natural consequence of their stupidity.

 

 

How can public humiliation be considered a natural consequence for something that isn't a public 'sin' (for lack of a better word)?

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