Sending Christian support to non-Christians?

[StephanieZ]

Thank you all for your sympathy and kind words, and for the great ideas on words to use. . . I will take some notes before the service. I'll make myself a list of appropriate commentary to use.

 

I am going to re-read Matthew. Mom was a believer, more so in her last years, and I would like to have some nod to her religion in the service. We are pointedly not including a religious leader in the service (my brother is even more atheist than I), but I might just give a little commentary from Matthew if I can read it and understand it sufficiently to preach it. I always have loved Jesus -- he was my kind of leader -- feed the hungry, love the unloved, serve the weak . . . . and damn the hypocrites. I just don't like religion, and I don't buy it, personally. 

 

I am glad to hear I don't need to send acknowledgments of cards. I know I do need to send them for donations (in lieu of flowers), flowers, and such. (Learned that when Dad died.) I will take Rosie up on her challenge and have Mom's aide inscribe the cards to those I don't want to deal with. 

 

Thanks, again. I didn't mean to hijack the thread. Just came out about Mom. Sorry about that.

[Audrey]

I've found the best thing to do is say "I'm sorry" and offer tangible help.  Not just "let me know if there's something I can do" but "can I bring you a meal tomorrow?" "Can I watch your kids for you?"    Sitting quietly, ready to listen without offering advice or platitudes of any kind, is good too.

 

:iagree:   wholeheartedly. 

[Miss Marple]

Coming into the discussion late...I wonder if the person knows your belief?  Or maybe she is just assuming you believe like she does?  I think many Christians are so used to offering that sort of consolation that they don't recognize when the sentiment might not be received in the spirit it was intended...it's a big blind spot for many.  My reaction to the card is that *she* would be comforted by such thoughts and assumes that anyone else would as well.  I truly hope she wasn't preaching at you.  

 

And I'm so sorry you're going through a bad time.  May you be surrounded by comforters and supporters during this time.

[TranquilMind]

Which to a non believer sounds like, "The great SparklyUnicorn is our refuge and strength.  She guides us with her magical uplifting horn and rainbow goodness." 

That is really sad.

 

I try to at least appreciate the spirit in which it is intended, which is usually fairly obvious to me. 

For example, there are people who have "lit candles" for us, which is pretty meaningless to me, but I know that to them, this has meaning, so I appreciate the good intentions. 

[bolt.]

Thank you all for your sympathy and kind words, and for the great ideas on words to use. . . I will take some notes before the service. I'll make myself a list of appropriate commentary to use.

 

I am going to re-read Matthew. Mom was a believer, more so in her last years, and I would like to have some nod to her religion in the service. We are pointedly not including a religious leader in the service (my brother is even more atheist than I), but I might just give a little commentary from Matthew if I can read it and understand it sufficiently to preach it. I always have loved Jesus -- he was my kind of leader -- feed the hungry, love the unloved, serve the weak . . . . and damn the hypocrites. I just don't like religion, and I don't buy it, personally.

 

I am glad to hear I don't need to send acknowledgments of cards. I know I do need to send them for donations (in lieu of flowers), flowers, and such. (Learned that when Dad died.) I will take Rosie up on her challenge and have Mom's aide inscribe the cards to those I don't want to deal with.

 

Thanks, again. I didn't mean to hijack the thread. Just came out about Mom. Sorry about that.

Let me know if I can help at all with Matthew or anything. You can pm if you need anything.