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Gifts Post-Divorce and/or Post-Hysterectomy


umsami
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So I have two friends going through two different life changing events right now.

 

One friend's divorce was just finalized....after a long painful process.

 

The other is going to have a hysterectomy tomorrow. :(

 

If you've gone through either one, what would have been a nice gift to receive?

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Hysterectomy: meals, disposable paper dishes, etc, plate of homemade holiday goodies since I wasn't up to the task, small memory foam pillow for lap

 

After SIL's divorce, I took her a ready made meal basket (gourmet spaghetti sauce, etc). I also tucked in one of these happy spoons with a note acknowledging her sadness/pain, and wishing her happy days ahead.

http://www.amazon.com/Red-Happy-Spoon-Zak-Designs/dp/B000X7KR5I/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&qid=1427308148&sr=8-4&keywords=happy+spoon

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I've never had a hysterectomy, but I've had a divorce. I didn't receive any gifts, but depending on the circumstances, maybe a girls night out, gc for a massage/mani/pedi/new do, something for a new home if she has to move (HELP with moving!!).

 

I had to move to a different house and I wanted all new things--nothing that looked like the old home I'd lived in with him. I remember I bought a new bed and bedding (gc to Bed, Bath and Beyond?), and once my divorce settlement came, I got all new furniture, new dishes, new car, etc. So, I'd feel out what she might need or want and go from there. NO self help books on how to survive a divorce, unless she mentions wanting one. If there are kids, maybe tickets to some event for her and the kids, sort of a way to start off a "new" family memory. 

 

Most of all, be supportive. That meant more to me than anything. My divorce was hideous and what I found out about EX was unbelievable. I was in shock/crisis mode for a long time. Having friends validate my feelings and support me meant more than any tangible gift could have. 

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So I have two friends going through two different life changing events right now.

 

One friend's divorce was just finalized....after a long painful process.

 

The other is going to have a hysterectomy tomorrow. :(

 

If you've gone through either one, what would have been a nice gift to receive?

I gave my sister a charm for her James Avery bracelet that said Hope on it. After her divorce.

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I've never had a hysterectomy, but I've had a divorce. I didn't receive any gifts, but depending on the circumstances, maybe a girls night out, gc for a massage/mani/pedi/new do, something for a new home if she has to move (HELP with moving!!).

 

I had to move to a different house and I wanted all new things--nothing that looked like the old home I'd lived in with him. I remember I bought a new bed and bedding (gc to Bed, Bath and Beyond?), and once my divorce settlement came, I got all new furniture, new dishes, new car, etc. So, I'd feel out what she might need or want and go from there. NO self help books on how to survive a divorce, unless she mentions wanting one. If there are kids, maybe tickets to some event for her and the kids, sort of a way to start off a "new" family memory.

 

Most of all, be supportive. That meant more to me than anything. My divorce was hideous and what I found out about EX was unbelievable. I was in shock/crisis mode for a long time. Having friends validate my feelings and support me meant more than any tangible gift could have.

Oooooh new bedding. I remember throwing my sheets away after I kicked XH out. Then realized I didnt have another set. LOL.....mom came through for me.

 

I got two gifts post divorce......one was a $200 check from my best friend and a card...another was a card with a hand drawn pic of a tree with a single bloom on it....and the caption said "ready to bloom.?"

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When my best friend had a hysterectomy, I went to her house and cleaned it while she was in the hospital. Her DH was at work and her kids were at her mom's.

 

That only works for a particular sort of friend, though.

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Post-hysterectomy, I was so grateful to a friend who would come and chat with me for an hour or so.  I was bored, but not ready to be out and about, nor entertain, and was grateful for a little (short-term) company.

 

Books are always good, too.

 

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