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According to my Fitbit, I was in bed from 12:28 to 8:57, slept 7 hour 49 minutes, woke 2x and was restless 22x.    And I just realized if I walk holding my tea mug in my hand (so hand is still), it doesn't record steps.   Interesting.

Edited by Where's Toto?
ETA: A Fitbit sleep booya or a really restless booya
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Ds just came out of his room and announced that he's been awake since 7am.   He finished his school for this week yesterday so I'm sure he's going to spend too many hours on his computer today.   We started a little bit light so that shouldn't be a problem starting next week, especially because he'll spend 2 1/2 days at the science center.  Plus LOTS more school.   Plus chores.  

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13 minutes ago, whitehawk said:

I would like all the pats on the head and food treat rewards for being a good hawk and replying to a ridiculous email from Current Church constructively and without using the terms gaslighting or #receipts.

Pat pat pat. Here's some chocolate! 

Wait, can hawks eat chocolate?

ETA Sorry. That sounds very frustrating.

Edited by ThatBookwormMom
Sympathy
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So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" I'm talking about kid chores.

Reader and Runner are 9 and 8, and they've been "helping" with house stuff since around 3. Right now, they're expected to take care of their own grooming (with reminders and checks), make their beds, clean up after themselves, and help fold and put away clothes. They also help with meal time chores (set the table, clear the table, wash the surfaces, sweep) and I'm teaching them to help with meal prep and wash dishes. 

SuperDude does a lot of the above, with more supervision and more checks, and he's in training for the things he doesn't know how to do yet.

Squishy is my current "helper." He actually made his own bed yesterday! Well, sorta, lol. But we're at the stage of I do it, then you try.

Does this seem reasonable or excessive? They also have schoolwork, of course, which includes consistent training in independence in what I feel is an age-appropriate way, with the goal of helping them be self teachers as young adults. But they still have lots of supervision, lots of help when needed, and lots of time for unstructured play, unless they refuse to do their work. Then they make it up at free time. I used to be more confident in my choices, but then there was that 7 yo independence thread, and it made me wonder if I'm pushing my kids too hard because *I* need them to be older/more mature/more independent or whatever.

Okay, I'm done. 😁 Thoughts?

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I must have looked very tired because Alex walked into my room and said "Mama, you need coffee."

My house is still a mess.

Yesterday I had to figure out how long the lessons are so I could group them adequately. Today I'm creating a chart so I can add in all the fun stuff. I can probably do one term a day and still have time for printing and binding the rest of school. I'm so glad I decided not to start next week!

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8 minutes ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

Pat pat pat. Here's some chocolate! 

Wait, can hawks eat chocolate?

ETA Sorry. That sounds very frustrating.

Carolina Whitehawks definitely believe chocolate > squirrels. 🙂

I'm pleased to see that other people's replies are going to address other aspects of the ridiculous email. My response to the "Hey, I have a great idea! What if we did X?" aspect of the email was a list of the nine different dates we have done X in the past 6 months. Someone else responded to a "But it would be cheaper to DIY Y!" by pointing out that it's actually illegal to do that. Someone else formulated a response to "Why don't we just do [failed solution Z] again and see if it works better this time?"
It takes a village.

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18 minutes ago, Where's Toto? said:

According to my Fitbit, I was in bed from 12:28 to 8:57, slept 7 hour 49 minutes, woke 2x and was restless 22x.    And I just realized if I walk holding my tea mug in my hand (so hand is still), it doesn't record steps.   Interesting.

I have my Fitbit on my non dominant wrist. 

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7 minutes ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" I'm talking about kid chores.

Reader and Runner are 9 and 8, and they've been "helping" with house stuff since around 3. Right now, they're expected to take care of their own grooming (with reminders and checks), make their beds, clean up after themselves, and help fold and put away clothes. They also help with meal time chores (set the table, clear the table, wash the surfaces, sweep) and I'm teaching them to help with meal prep and wash dishes. 

SuperDude does a lot of the above, with more supervision and more checks, and he's in training for the things he doesn't know how to do yet.

Squishy is my current "helper." He actually made his own bed yesterday! Well, sorta, lol. But we're at the stage of I do it, then you try.

Does this seem reasonable or excessive? They also have schoolwork, of course, which includes consistent training in independence in what I feel is an age-appropriate way, with the goal of helping them be self teachers as young adults. But they still have lots of supervision, lots of help when needed, and lots of time for unstructured play, unless they refuse to do their work. Then they make it up at free time. I used to be more confident in my choices, but then there was that 7 yo independence thread, and it made me wonder if I'm pushing my kids too hard because *I* need them to be older/more mature/more independent or whatever.

Okay, I'm done. 😁 Thoughts?

As someone who is NOT a fan of the lets make all 7 year olds do things independently thing, you are just fine. You are supervising them and scaffolding them and teaching them which is the opposite of expecting them to be completely independent in everything in a few months. 

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1 hour ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" I'm talking about kid chores.

Reader and Runner are 9 and 8, and they've been "helping" with house stuff since around 3. Right now, they're expected to take care of their own grooming (with reminders and checks), make their beds, clean up after themselves, and help fold and put away clothes. They also help with meal time chores (set the table, clear the table, wash the surfaces, sweep) and I'm teaching them to help with meal prep and wash dishes. 

SuperDude does a lot of the above, with more supervision and more checks, and he's in training for the things he doesn't know how to do yet.

Squishy is my current "helper." He actually made his own bed yesterday! Well, sorta, lol. But we're at the stage of I do it, then you try.

Does this seem reasonable or excessive? They also have schoolwork, of course, which includes consistent training in independence in what I feel is an age-appropriate way, with the goal of helping them be self teachers as young adults. But they still have lots of supervision, lots of help when needed, and lots of time for unstructured play, unless they refuse to do their work. Then they make it up at free time. I used to be more confident in my choices, but then there was that 7 yo independence thread, and it made me wonder if I'm pushing my kids too hard because *I* need them to be older/more mature/more independent or whatever.

Okay, I'm done. 😁 Thoughts?

Sounds age-appropriate to me. You're not setting SuperDude up with a steam iron, R and R with bottles of bleach and toothbrushes, etc.!

Take a look at Montessori schools' "practical life" activities.

Edited by whitehawk
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1 minute ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" 

All 3 (3,6,8) are expected to pick up their messes, clear the table and fulfill random requests. The 6 and 8 year olds instruct the 3 year old in picking up while the 6 year old wipes tables and counters, refills and checks art supplies, brushes her hair and straitens closets while the 8 year old makes the beds, tends to the animals (dog fed and watered, snake watered, dog out to be emptied and picked up after), rotates laundry and sometimes vacuumes and mops. Everyone works for the same amount of time because if someone runs out of tasks they straiten books and stuffed animals or help someone or ask for additional tasks until everyone is done.

Feel free to read that to your kids!

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36 minutes ago, whitehawk said:

I would like all the pats on the head and food treat rewards for being a good hawk and replying to a ridiculous email from Current Church constructively and without using the terms gaslighting or #receipts.

ETA: Also did not bless anyone's heart or shout THAT'S THE ENTIRE ******* POINT.

Self-restraint, y'all.

👍👍👍🎉🎉🥇🥇 🍟🍕🍧🍡🍰🍫🍫🍫🍭🍩🏆🏆🏆🎖🎖🎖🏅🏅🏖🏖💎

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9 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

I have my Fitbit on my non dominant wrist. 

I do too but I carry things in my non-dominant hand.  Is that unusual?  

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4 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

As someone who is NOT a fan of the lets make all 7 year olds do things independently thing, you are just fine. You are supervising them and scaffolding them and teaching them which is the opposite of expecting them to be completely independent in everything in a few months. 

Lol! Don't read my post!

They aren't independent though. I watch, correct, help and help with communication.

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1 minute ago, Where's Toto? said:

I do too but I carry things in my non-dominant hand.  Is that unusual?  

Yes. Do you think you might be ambidextrous and were told to choose a hand at a young age?

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Well, maybe not tea. Maybe you want your dominant hand available for use. I can see that if you carried something around regularly that you would keep your dominant hand free.

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4 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

As someone who is NOT a fan of the lets make all 7 year olds do things independently thing, you are just fine. You are supervising them and scaffolding them and teaching them which is the opposite of expecting them to be completely independent in everything in a few months. 

Well, to be honest, I sometimes get in a place where I'm annoyed because "don't you already know that?!?" or "you're old enough to figure that out!" But if they're not, they're not, and we pull back and start again from where they *are* competent. I had NO scaffolding and little teaching as a kid, and it made me a young adult on my own with no knowledge of how laundry worked or how to make boxed mac n cheese. Thank God for public libraries and, later, the internet.

And I agree, completely independent at 7 is crazy. It was just the comment of one poster that the OP wanted it because *she* needed her kid to be older that hit pretty close to home.

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8 minutes ago, whitehawk said:

Sounds age-appropriate to me. You're not setting SuperDude up with a steam iron, R and R with bottles of bleach and toothbrushes, etc. Take a look at Montessori schools' "practical life" activities.

Totally googling that now.

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8 minutes ago, Slache said:

All 3 (3,6,8) are expected to pick up their messes, clear the table and fulfill random requests. The 6 and 8 year olds instruct the 3 year old in picking up while the 6 year old wipes tables and counters, refills and checks art supplies, brushes her hair and straitens closets while the 8 year old makes the beds, tends to the animals (dog fed and watered, snake watered, dog out to be emptied and picked up after), rotates laundry and sometimes vacuumes and mops. Everyone works for the same amount of time because if someone runs out of tasks they straiten books and stuffed animals or help someone or ask for additional tasks until everyone is done.

Feel free to read that to your kids!

Lol. I did read it them, and Runner says, "Hey, that sounds like us! Except we have more kids and no pets. Can we get a dog and a snake?"

I told him ask me again when Baby Cheeto is 4.

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36 minutes ago, Where's Toto? said:

I do too but I carry things in my non-dominant hand.  Is that unusual?  

I carry most everything in my non, so I can continue working with dominant hand.  I can't stand to do one thing at a time 

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I got second sleep but my Fitbit didn’t give me credit for it. I know that I got it because I actually dreamed that I was at camp dealing with my two most challenging little boys EVER (neither who were at camp last year). Maybe the Fitbit didn’t recognize it as sleep because I was dealing with my two most challenging little boys ever in my sleep!

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2 hours ago, myblessings4 said:

Good morning!  Getting ready for the day.  I'm thinking about making broccoli cheese soup and potato soup for supper, to have with club sandwiches.   Hopefully I will stay motivated this morning.  Working after I pick up kids this afternoon.  Plus some from home this morning.

I really needed to get my exercise routine going, but I think not letting the veggies go bad is a better idea.  

I also have to wash ds bedding.  Dh locked the cat up in ds room night before last.

My weight bench is being delivered today!

 

Okay.  So.  Both soups are made and cooling, and I made chaffles so that I can eat a sandwich with everyone else.  Ds's comforter is in the dryer and sheets in the washer.  Plus I steamed the rest of the broccoli for ds to eat, fed and watered the guinea pigs and chickens, and fed dogs.  Now I'm having my iced coffee til time to pick up ds.

I expect points for quoting self.

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1 hour ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" I'm talking about kid chores.

Reader and Runner are 9 and 8, and they've been "helping" with house stuff since around 3. Right now, they're expected to take care of their own grooming (with reminders and checks), make their beds, clean up after themselves, and help fold and put away clothes. They also help with meal time chores (set the table, clear the table, wash the surfaces, sweep) and I'm teaching them to help with meal prep and wash dishes. 

SuperDude does a lot of the above, with more supervision and more checks, and he's in training for the things he doesn't know how to do yet.

Squishy is my current "helper." He actually made his own bed yesterday! Well, sorta, lol. But we're at the stage of I do it, then you try.

Does this seem reasonable or excessive? They also have schoolwork, of course, which includes consistent training in independence in what I feel is an age-appropriate way, with the goal of helping them be self teachers as young adults. But they still have lots of supervision, lots of help when needed, and lots of time for unstructured play, unless they refuse to do their work. Then they make it up at free time. I used to be more confident in my choices, but then there was that 7 yo independence thread, and it made me wonder if I'm pushing my kids too hard because *I* need them to be older/more mature/more independent or whatever.

Okay, I'm done. 😁 Thoughts?

That's completely reasonable, IMO.

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My kids were expected to help in age appropriate ways as soon as they could crawl. (This looked like “bring Mommy the diaper!” at first. ). I have nothing against kids learning to do chores or learning to work on the rest of a worksheet while I did something else. 

I also had to reset my attitude (and confess my sin) many times when I did get impatient and expected too much. 

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1 hour ago, Where's Toto? said:

I do too but I carry things in my non-dominant hand.  Is that unusual?  

I find a tea mug heavy for my non dominant hand. But that’s probably more an illustration of my joint problems than anything else. 

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Yep, definitely no stranger to apologizing to my kids, and repenting of poor attitudes. *Sigh* You'd think this is something that would improve the more I do it, but....

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Morning, by the way. Today is going to be a rough, tough day. Really rough and tough. But it needs to be done.

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1 hour ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

So, soliciting opinions here. I need perspective to see if I'm being reasonable, or if I actually am "the meanest mom ever born!" I'm talking about kid chores.

Reader and Runner are 9 and 8, and they've been "helping" with house stuff since around 3. Right now, they're expected to take care of their own grooming (with reminders and checks), make their beds, clean up after themselves, and help fold and put away clothes. They also help with meal time chores (set the table, clear the table, wash the surfaces, sweep) and I'm teaching them to help with meal prep and wash dishes. 

SuperDude does a lot of the above, with more supervision and more checks, and he's in training for the things he doesn't know how to do yet.

Squishy is my current "helper." He actually made his own bed yesterday! Well, sorta, lol. But we're at the stage of I do it, then you try.

Does this seem reasonable or excessive? They also have schoolwork, of course, which includes consistent training in independence in what I feel is an age-appropriate way, with the goal of helping them be self teachers as young adults. But they still have lots of supervision, lots of help when needed, and lots of time for unstructured play, unless they refuse to do their work. Then they make it up at free time. I used to be more confident in my choices, but then there was that 7 yo independence thread, and it made me wonder if I'm pushing my kids too hard because *I* need them to be older/more mature/more independent or whatever.

Okay, I'm done. 😁 Thoughts?

I think this sounds fine. :)

Chores at our house:

Dd17, dd15, dd13, and dd11 are on a rotating weekly schedule.  Dd9 is dd17's substitute when dd17 is at work.

Dining room -- set the table before meals, clear the table after meals, sweep at least once a day (ahem)

Dish washer -- wash all of the dishes (we have a dishwasher)

Meal helper -- makes lunch (some need more assistance than others); helps to make dinner

Laundry helper -- washes and dries all of the kids' laundry (dd11 still requires assistance).  The girls (are supposed to) put away their own laundry.

 

Several times a week we do 15 minutes of cleaning.  I would like to do this every day.  Set a timer for 15 minutes, everyone does a chore, everyone gets a piece of chocolate.

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28 minutes ago, myblessings4 said:

I expect points for quoting self.

But of course!! Have as many as you like!!

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I did yoga. Julia was glad to see me and she said I did a great job at the end.

Now wash the goat, have breakfast and get the girls a-schooling.

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1 hour ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

I have my Fitbit on my non dominant wrist. 

I always wore my watch on my non dominant wrist (back when I wore one), and carry my pocketbook on my left shoulder.  Otherwise, they get in the way of  regular tasks. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

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3 minutes ago, ThatBookwormMom said:

Junie, I LOVE the 15 minute clean then eat chocolate idea! Thank you.

Yes, this can been so helpful.  I don't have a lot of energy, but if you get everyone working for 15 minutes you can actually get a lot done.

We set a timer and then get a Hershey's miniature or fun-size candy bar when we're done.  If someone refuses to participate in the cleaning (it has happened), then they don't get chocolate.  We almost always have 100 percent participation.

15 minute chores include:

dust, sweep, vacuum, organize something, put away misplaced items, clean a bathroom, empty trash, change towels, fill soap dispensers, wash windows, wash mirrors, clean microwave, wipe down kitchen cabinets, wash doors, wash walls, disinfect doorknobs, wash dining room chairs, change bedding

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Outta likes AGAIN! But I still like y'all!

Bookie, not unreasonable.  I find that as my older kids got older and more responible, my younger ones somewhat followed suit.  It takes time.  It will get better!

(((Critter)))  soothing tea for you!

Yay Whitehawk!  Chocolates for you!

We saw a hawk in our oak tree this morning.  I think he was checking out our chickens.

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Angi's on a roll.  . .

I washed the goat and made her all purty for the guy delivering ds' latest nonworking car to add to our car graveyard.  Sigh.  In exchange, I made him agree to get rid of one other nonworking car that is already here but I am the one who has to make it happen. 

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5 older children have been delivered to choir.

I'm wondering if I can sneak a nap.

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Heh, I just bribed the four year old to play with the two year old and keep him happy so I can get a nap.

Hope it works.

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1 hour ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

I got second sleep but my Fitbit didn’t give me credit for it. I know that I got it because I actually dreamed that I was at camp dealing with my two most challenging little boys EVER (neither who were at camp last year). Maybe the Fitbit didn’t recognize it as sleep because I was dealing with my two most challenging little boys ever in my sleep!

You can add in the time. I've found the Fitbit will work out what was sleep and restless when I do that.

I had my favorite breakfast: chilaquiles con huevo. But not mixed together.

[a thing I forgot I was going to say, but will remember later]

So, I have HP Instant Ink. I forgot to downgrade my subscription and currently have about 900 pages available to print. Anyone need a textbook or two? I'm currently printing out a bunch of Singapore math. Maybe I can find a bunch of Spanish and/or Chinese to print. and some more English stuff. I don't know.

 

Oops. Forgot to submit this over an hour ago. And I still don't remember what that other thing was that I wanted to say.

 

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32 minutes ago, Jean in Newcastle said:

Angi's on a roll.  . .

I washed the goat and made her all purty for the guy delivering ds' latest nonworking car to add to our car graveyard.  Sigh.  In exchange, I made him agree to get rid of one other nonworking car that is already here but I am the one who has to make it happen. 

How many nonworking cars are there?

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