marbel Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Oh for me it's clear: the deeper lesson here is "question authority". It's what I do. It's how I raise my kids. Think, think hard, think about consequence, think about your conscience, think about your ethical principles, think about the very simple "what if everyone did this, would the world still 'work'?" & then make a decision & live with it. I agree with you about questioning authority. Kids need to learn when and how to do that. But we don't just say "nope" to everything an authority tells us that we don't like. First we consider whether or not the rule is reasonable. "I don't like it" isn't enough. Does following the rule or obeying the authority break the law (someone brought up bosses asking young employees to commit crimes), violate my conscience, potentially threaten my or others' health and safety, or is it just something that I don't like? In this thread, some of us are saying that the no phone rule is reasonable and thus should be followed. Others disagree. If I felt a rule was unreasonable, then, sure, I would question it (and expect my kids to do so). In this case, my answer to the question in the OP is "yes, you are wrong to ignore that rule" because I find the rule to be reasonable. (Based on the fact that I wouldn't leave my kids with adults that I didn't trust and respect.) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyS Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Ok, after reading your other thread, I'm even more confused by why you think your child needs a cell phone. Just because the YE stuff is eyeroll worthy (I'm totally with you there), doesn't mean she needs to call you. What does that phone call sound like in your head? "Mom, they are getting YE goo all over me, please get me out of here?" Honestly, I would just tell her to expect it from these people, that you have enough experience of them now to know that it's likely and that she needs to be prepared to deal with it in some way, or not to go. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Ok, after reading your other thread, I'm even more confused by why you think your child needs a cell phone. Just because the YE stuff is eyeroll worthy (I'm totally with you there), doesn't mean she needs to call you. What does that phone call sound like in your head? "Mom, they are getting YE goo all over me, please get me out of here?" Honestly, I would just tell her to expect it from these people, that you have enough experience of them now to know that it's likely and that she needs to be prepared to deal with it in some way, or not to go. "Hey, Mom, at the end of XYZ activity they are showing a Kirk Cameron video about how to talk to atheists. I know how you feel about that so you might want to show up an hour early." 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyS Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 "Hey, Mom, at the end of XYZ activity they are showing a Kirk Cameron video about how to talk to atheists. I know how you feel about that so you might want to show up an hour early." Because, what? Is it going to be harmful in some way? If you're going to continue hanging out with these people, you might want to just get comfortable with the fact that they are YE and they are going to expose your kids to some of their YE goo. If you can't handle that, you should probably just stay away from them. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
albeto. Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Because, what? Is it going to be harmful in some way? If you're going to continue hanging out with these people, you might want to just get comfortable with the fact that they are YE and they are going to expose your kids to some of their YE goo. If you can't handle that, you should probably just stay away from them. Moxie's in the position of having to fend brainwashing techniques off her kids in the only places where the kids meet. I don't think anyone should have to justify giving their kid a phone, and if this is what Moxie's up against, why should she have to leave and let her kids suffer the negative consequences (shunning) of not being one of the Chosen People of her town? That's unnecessary. This isn't Ave Maria, Florida. This is Everytown, USA. (huh, just answered my own question in the other thread. this is so confusing, lol!) 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Muttichen Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Yeah, but if Moxie is sending her child to the activity, her child needs to participate and respect the rules. Think of it from the perspective of the leaders. Do they want all the kids calling their mommies to come get them early every time there is something they disagree with? That's disruptive to the group. If it's really "brainwashing", her child shouldn't be there. Either suck it up and participate or stay home. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 I only have one school age child left. No way do I want her to leave the house without the cell phone. Turn it off, leave it in your backpack. But you keep it with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Because, what? Is it going to be harmful in some way? If you're going to continue hanging out with these people, you might want to just get comfortable with the fact that they are YE and they are going to expose your kids to some of their YE goo. If you can't handle that, you should probably just stay away from them. Because, it is easier for me to bring up objections if I see the situation first hand. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TammyS Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 Moxie's in the position of having to fend brainwashing techniques off her kids in the only places where the kids meet. I don't think anyone should have to justify giving their kid a phone, and if this is what Moxie's up against, why should she have to leave and let her kids suffer the negative consequences (shunning) of not being one of the Chosen People of her town? That's unnecessary. This isn't Ave Maria, Florida. This is Everytown, USA. (huh, just answered my own question in the other thread. this is so confusing, lol!) But leaving is exactly what she's talking about....leaving if something she doesn't like is going to be presented. All I'm saying is that if you can't handle having things presented that you will object to, when you know there's a good chance that's what's going to happen, then you shouldn't show up there and then leave. You're disrupting the flow of the group and it's rude. Funny you mention Ave Maria, it's on my son's short list of colleges. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
albeto. Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 All I'm saying is that if you can't handle having things presented that you will object to, when you know there's a good chance that's what's going to happen, then you shouldn't show up there and then leave. You're disrupting the flow of the group and it's rude. Yeah, I see that, too. I feel like Vinnie Barbarino here. "I'm so confused!" Because on the one hand, I don't think kids should be subjected to this kind of bullying, and I think a mother standing in the background ready to support her child is important. On the other, Moxie can't do much about it. It's the way the PTB like it. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LucyStoner Posted March 13, 2015 Share Posted March 13, 2015 It's not a rule unless someone breaks it, right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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