If you've managed to break an emotional eating habit, can you share how you did it and what you do instead?

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

I've been thinking A LOT about my eating habits lately. I've come to the conclusion that eating is one of the very few ways I can make myself feel good these days. When the kids finally go to bed after a long, drawn-out bedtime routine...when DH takes them to his mother's and I'm finally alone...when I have a half hour to myself in the car running errands...when I'm having a bad day or feeling stressed...when I'm settling in to do my paid work (which I don't really want to be doing in the first place and which stresses me out)...I inevitably find myself digging around in the kitchen or actively preventing myself from stopping at Starbucks or the convenience store, either to soothe myself, or to reward myself, or to enhance the experience of finally being alone for a little while. Does that make sense? And I can't just eat a small square of chocolate or one small brownie or something--that just leaves me unsatisfied and craving more. I'm better off having none. 

 

I've been trying to think about what I can do to get those endorphins instead of eating, and I can't think of anything (and no, the Mike's Blood Orange doesn't really count :lol:). That is terribly frustrating to me. I'm an introvert, so I spend the majority of my time burned out and worn down. I also feel like everything I do is for everyone else--the kids, DH, my work, other HSers, etc., that eating is the one thing I have that's for me alone. I've come to accept that this is just how it's going to be until the kids move out, or are at least old enough to make their own plans and get themselves places, etc. But in the meantime, I can't keep eating like I have. IMO, I've reached a crisis point in terms of my health here. I also have a DD who seems to be on the same track (though I suspect she eats more for distraction and sensory input than comfort, really).

 

So what do people who have a healthy relationship with food do instead of eating in these kinds of scenarios? What do you do that feels good or that calms you? How do you reward yourself? 

 

Thanks. 

 

[Laurie4b]

1/ Exercise is the key for me. For one thing, it gives you those endorphins. For another, for me, it seems to affect my appetite. I think it has a regulatory effect on the hormones.

 

You can find ways to incorporate exercise if you have young kids: get a DVD and let them do it with you, do "high knees" marching while you brush your teeth; go to a mall or park and walk if you have that 1/2 hr extra in the car, etc. Stop your paid work after 50 min and do 10 min of some kind of exercise. You can do strength training (squats, push-ups, planks) or just walk around the house fast, jump rope, etc. Then go back to your paid work. Do regular 50-10 cycles.

 

2. The other thing that helped me tremendously was focusing on getting 9 servings of fruits and veges per day. Fills you up and you will also lose a lot of cravings. I figure part of it is because you will be better nourished.

 

3. I keep dark chocolate around. I can do just a couple squares if I use Trader Joe's organic dark. It hits the spot for a chocolate fix but it's not super creamy and so I don't keep going back for "just one more piece."

 

4. Drink enough water.

 

5. Get enough sleep

[Slache]

I replaced eating with reading, but working out in the mornings lowered my stress level.

[BigMamaBird]

In Weight Watchers we talked about Emotional Eating a lot.  One of the things we discussed that it was okay to have an emotional reaction to our emotions.  If you're sad, go ahead and have a good cry.  If you're angry, find someone you can safely download to.  We talked about doing things like journaling or taking a vigorous walk/bike ride/run.  Don't just bury your feelings in a tub of chocolate chip ice cream.

 

I can't say I've kicked the Emotional Eating habit, but I don't feel so weird these days about going into the shower and having a really hard ugly cry if I need to.  Sometimes it just helps.

 

[milovany]

What has worked for me, to remove eating from the realm of emotions, is eating slowly only when physically hungry, paying attention to satiety signals, and stopping before full (when just satisfied).  Lather, rinse, repeat.  I'm not very good at it!  But it does work.  It makes eating a physical thing, not an emotional one.  You can still enjoy good food this way and you can also eat whatever you want (I found that I prefer "good" foods more when I eat in this manner). If you can have chocolate every single time you eat, you'll get sick of it eventually and want better foods. If you're eating cookies slowly for lunch, and paying attention to that "enough sugar!" signal in the back of your throat, and stopping at that point, you're not going to eat many cookies. 

 

When you want to eat, but you're not hungry, do something else that's satisfying.  Short walk, read a book, pray, paint, write a letter, whatever. 

[JumpyTheFrog]

You might try to replace it with another habit. How about getting an electric tea kettle and having some herbal tea instead?

[*Inna*]

:bigear:

[catz]

Working on this too!  :grouphug:

[TranquilMind]

I don't have 100% control over it. But I've been working on it for six years now and I'd say it's 80% conquered.

 

Being sleep deprived worsens my control, as does stress. So taking conscious time to de stress matters, and getting adequate sleep is crucial.

 

My main strategies, in order:

 

1). Telling myself I can have an item later, as opposed to trying to white knuckle it. Most of the time if I defer a craving or eating a half hour, the urge goes away.

 

2) Keeping my hands and brain busy. I do this with knitting/crochet/sewing/tatting/spinning/etc, reading, or even a chore.

 

3) Tea or iced coffee with heavy cream and stevia, with chia seed. This hits the sweet tooth, gives me fat content, caffeine, and fiber. Great compromise that soothes the itch to be eating or drinking something decadent, but it's perfectly on plan for me and helps if I'm having a stress related blood sugar drop.

All of this.

Plus fear.  When you have a couple of scary symptoms happen, you stop eating junk cold turkey!  That happened for me.  No gall bladder stuff every actually developed but I'm down around 40 pounds since then.  I did have to be careful around Christmas.

 

I've come to the conclusion that sugar is like crack - at least to me.  If I don't eat it, I'm good.  If I eat a little, I want it all.    When I'm desperate, yogurt and raspberries or a smoothie hits the spot.   Or raw chocolate.  Raw chocolate is AWESOME, but about $7.00 a bar, so I'm too cheap to buy it all the time. 

 

We don't even buy that stuff anymore.   They tried for awhile but did not hide it well.  ;)  Now if you want sweets, you buy some out. 

[Mergath]

I play computer games.  It gives me a nice endorphin rush and occupies my mind enough to keep me from thinking longingly about snacks.

[Rosie_0801]

Keeping my B vitamins up seems to have solved that problem for me. Or at least I think it is that.

[PeachyDoodle]

This is probably going to sound strange, but for me it was the realization that the way I was eating was not compatible with my faith. I was being controlled by my emotions/cravings/compulsions/flesh/{insert descriptor of choice here} and, as a Christian, I believe that Jesus died to set me free from those things. I still fight it, but my battle has become so much easier now that I realize that. YMMV. :)

 

Really vigorous, push-myself-to-the-limit exercise was also a huge benefit for me, as was balancing my carb intake. I still eat them (there's white rice on my plate as we speak!) but always balanced with lean protein and lots and lots of veggies. Those blood sugar spikes do nasty things to me!

 

Also, the understanding that it's not an all-or-nothing proposition. I'm a perfectionist, so this is hard for me. If I mess up, I just start over the next day. Sometimes, I've had to "hit the reset button" for many days in a row. But I keep getting back up, as many times as it takes.

 

Good luck. Those of us who have been there know just how hard this is. :grouphug:

[BigMamaBird]

This is probably going to sound strange, but for me it was the realization that the way I was eating was not compatible with my faith. I was being controlled by my emotions/cravings/compulsions/flesh/{insert descriptor of choice here} and, as a Christian, I believe that Jesus died to set me free from those things. I still fight it, but my battle has become so much easier now that I realize that. YMMV. :)

 

Really vigorous, push-myself-to-the-limit exercise was also a huge benefit for me, as was balancing my carb intake. I still eat them (there's white rice on my plate as we speak!) but always balanced with lean protein and lots and lots of veggies. Those blood sugar spikes do nasty things to me!

 

Also, the understanding that it's not an all-or-nothing proposition. I'm a perfectionist, so this is hard for me. If I mess up, I just start over the next day. Sometimes, I've had to "hit the reset button" for many days in a row. But I keep getting back up, as many times as it takes.

 

Good luck. Those of us who have been there know just how hard this is. :grouphug:

 

Your whole post is great, but the bold part really stuck out to me.  I do the same thing.  If I "mess up" in the morning that doesn't give me free reign to eat garbage the rest of the day. 

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

You might try to replace it with another habit. How about getting an electric tea kettle and having some herbal tea instead?

 

Really? No one has anything at all to say about this?! I feel like Chandler from Friends: "Look everyone! Ross is wearing leather pants!!!"

 

(Sorry Hoppy, not sure if you get the tea/teA reference. It just struck me as particularly funny, especially after a recent thread full of euphemisms and innuendo :lol:)

[ILiveInFlipFlops]

Thank you all for the replies so far. I know--I KNOW--that exercise is one of the keys. But exercise feels like just another of those things I have to do that I don't. want. to. do. I feel like I spend all my time doing stuff I don't want to do. The idea of adding something else--and rearranging all the other things I don't want to do to make time for this new, strenuous thing I don't want to do--overwhelms me. But I know I need to. I really do. I wish our weather would clear up so I could go outside a bit.

 

I'm contemplating the other ideas as well. I SO wish I could have coffee. That would actually go a long way toward helping me, but I don't tolerate caffeine--even the tiniest bit--well at all anymore :( I miss it terribly. 

 

I'm  :bigear: and thinking...

[BigMamaBird]

Thank you all for the replies so far. I know--I KNOW--that exercise is one of the keys. But exercise feels like just another of those things I have to do that I don't. want. to. do. I feel like I spend all my time doing stuff I don't want to do. The idea of adding something else--and rearranging all the other things I don't want to do to make time for this new, strenuous thing I don't want to do--overwhelms me. But I know I need to. I really do. I wish our weather would clear up so I could go outside a bit.

 

I'm contemplating the other ideas as well. I SO wish I could have coffee. That would actually go a long way toward helping me, but I don't tolerate caffeine--even the tiniest bit--well at all anymore :( I miss it terribly. 

 

I'm  :bigear: and thinking...

 

One summer our family took up Geocaching as a hobby and set a goal of finding a cache every day for one month.  We were out hiking in the woods at least an hour or two each day as a family and had a terrific time!  My Dh lost 20 lbs. in one month, simply by hiking every day and wearing a baby in a back pack.  It made me SO JEALOUS!!!  But maybe if you start a fun activity as a family it can be less exercise and more entertainment.  

 

I seriously recommend Geocaching, it's a hoot!  Like my Dh says, "I use billion dollar, military satellites to find tupperwear in the woods!"

 

www.geocaching.com/

[KrissiK]

I emotionally eat, too. And I by no means have it under control, but when I can force myself to do it and not nosh on something, peppermint herbal tea helps me a lot. Sweetened with stevia. It gives my mouth something to do, and it does take a while to drink it, it's sweet, but zero calories and caffeine.

[Annie G]

Two things worked for me. The first was limiting carbs all the time. We're not super low, but we usually don't even have bread in the house, unless we splurge and get a loaf that has 5 carbs per slice.  We have one serving a day of something carb-y, such as cooking brown rice and having 1/4 cup mixed w our veggies.  I found that limiting carbs helped get rid of my desire for lots of carbs.

 

The second thing is that I developed a love for a drink that I could have.  My drink of choice is Pepsi Max. It's not good for me, but it is calorie free. And I love it. So when I'm stressed, I fix a large icy cup of that and it fills my need. 

 

Dh and I didn't really eat so much emotionally as we associated good events with good food.  That's almost as difficult to break as an emotional eating habit.  Different things work for different people- hope you find a suggestion that works for you. 

[Isabella]

Whole30 got rid of my emotional attachment to food. I never believed it would, but now, even six weeks later, I don't have the same feelings about food. I think it's nothing short of miraculous. It was relatively easy to do, too. :-)

[speedmom4]

The No S diet eliminated 99% of my emotional eating. No S stands for No Sweets, No Snacks, and No Seconds except on days that start with S (Saturday, Sunday, and Special occasions). I have been following it for 13 months and I've lost 12 pounds and several inches. I'm in a size 4 pants and I'm 40.

 

http://www.nosdiet.com

 

Good luck!

 

Elise in NC