S/O on modesty

[Rebel]

I live in Austin, Texas were it is perfectly legal for anyone, male or female to be topless in public. It is common to find a topless woman or two at any of the public swimming pools. You only have to have your anus and genitalia covered up (except for Hippie Hollow where you can be totally nude).  Anyway, I have one friend who is very much an activist in this area and she proudly marches downtown topless often.  I have seen people sunbathing topless and even biking topless, usually more downtown and south Austin, but it is not super uncommon. I asked my activist friend if the topless law truly meant "anywhere" in public. She assured me it did and said she could ride her bike through a school zone topless and be completely legal. The only caveat is if someone is intentionally trying to create a disturbance. The example she gave was standing beside a major highway jumping up and down topless, waving a flag and basically causing such a distraction that a traffic accident could happen.  I am fine with all this by the way, though I am more of a string bikini person in public and keep my no-tan lines sunbathing for my own pool.

 

I say all this to ask, how do parents who are trying to encourage modesty in their children or who raise their children not to see someone of the opposite sex undressed handle this type situation?  

 

[Crimson Wife]

We see occasional nudity when we're in San Francisco. It's legal. The kids know that I don't approve of it just like they know I don't approve of all sorts of other lifestyle choices. Adults are free to make their own life choices within the boundaries of the law. That doesn't mean I have to pretend to like them or refrain from considering certain choices sinful. That said, we are all sinners and we need to worry about the beams in our own eyes rather than the specks in our neighbors' eyes.

[Xuzi]

Same as I do for just about everything else that people do that's contrary to my family's values, tell them: "Not everyone shares our same values or standards. Still treat them nice."

[busymama7]

We live in Las Vegas ;)

 

We just teach our children to avert their eyes and we do as well. Billboards are everywhere here and we just choose not to look at them. Of course they know we don't approve. No need to rehash it all the time. It's pretty much a non issue.

 

If they were to see a *totally* topless female(as opposed to one with poker chips barely covering her n*pples,LOL) they would be shocked but we would just remind them to look elsewhere and not dwell on it.

[kroe1]

Move

[Excelsior! Academy]

Wow.  I must live under a rock.  I did not know it was legal *anywhere* in the U.S. except for designated nude/topless areas.

[Crimson Wife]

We just teach our children to avert their eyes and we do as well. Billboards are everywhere here and we just choose not to look at them. Of course they know we don't approve. No need to rehash it all the time. It's pretty much a non issue.

 

If they were to see a *totally* topless female(as opposed to one with poker chips barely covering her n*pples,LOL) they would be shocked but we would just remind them to look elsewhere and not dwell on it.

 

Yes, this.

 

I also teach my kids about context and intent. A lot of moms here nurse their babies in a manner that would not fit my personal standards of modesty. Seeing bare b00ks in that context is very different from nudity that is intended to be s*xually provocative.

[albeto.]

Yes, this.

 

I also teach my kids about context and intent. A lot of moms here nurse their babies in a manner that would not fit my personal standards of modesty. Seeing bare b00ks in that context is very different from nudity that is intended to be s*xually provocative.

 

In the context of nursing outside your personal standards of modesty? or Nursing as opposed to bare breasts?

[unsinkable]

Wow. I must live under a rock. I did not know it was legal *anywhere* in the U.S. except for designated nude/topless areas.

I'm pretty sure that in NYS, women can legally be topless anywhere a man can legally be topless.

[Denise in Florida]

We see occasional nudity when we're in San Francisco. It's legal. The kids know that I don't approve of it just like they know I don't approve of all sorts of other lifestyle choices. Adults are free to make their own life choices within the boundaries of the law. That doesn't mean I have to pretend to like them or refrain from considering certain choices sinful. That said, we are all sinners and we need to worry about the beams in our own eyes rather than the specks in our neighbors' eyes.

 

I liked your response.  To me (IMO) the key word is adult.  If it is not illegal and an adult makes his or her choice, the only thing I control is how I respond.  That is pretty much what I teach my children as well. 

 

I don't care either way about topless nudity but there are many many other things out there that are also illegal and annoying. As much as possible I just ignore things that do bother me, I try to practice "don't like it, don't pay attention"

 

 

 

Same as I do for just about everything else that people do that's contrary to my family's values, tell them: "Not everyone shares our same values or standards. Still treat them nice."

  

:hurray:  :hurray:  like this one too.  I can't control anyone else but I can control how I respond.

[ktgrok]

 

 

I say all this to ask, how do parents who are trying to encourage modesty in their children or who raise their children not to see someone of the opposite sex undressed handle this type situation?  

 

My first thought was those people probably don't live in Austin, lol.

[Crimson Wife]

In the context of nursing outside your personal standards of modesty? or Nursing as opposed to bare breasts?

 

Bare b00ks on a mom nursing her baby is very different than bare b00ks on an exotic dancer or adult film star, etc., etc. One is using nudity to do something totally uns*xual and the other is using nudity to be s*xually provocative. That's what I mean by context and intent.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Move

 

 

 

Really?

[GeorgiaGirl160]

We are conservative Christians.  We teach our children that reasonable modesty shows respect to themselves and others.  I have refused to buy my kindergarten aged daughter certain dolls at Walmart because they were dressed like hookers.  

 

We don't advocate the level of covering up practiced by some Orthodox groups, but personally, I think only my husband needs to see my boobs, and it's kind of nice that we have some special areas of our bodies and our lives that are just for each other. 

 

Breastfeeding is totally different.  I have breastfed in public, and happily support the right of all mothers to breastfeed anywhere anytime.  There's nothing provocative about that. 

 

Personally, I think it's really rude for anyone to flash unwilling strangers in a provocative manner.  Anyone walking practically naked down the public road as if to say "wow, look at me", has mental issues.  It's on a level with carring a screaming boombox on your shoulder at 100 db or wearing a Nazi flag/Confederate flag/shirt that says "F U".  Legal?  Sure.  Polite?  No.  Part of civil society?  I hope not.

 

How would I handle it if someone felt the need to flash her boobs at my nine year old son in public and it was legal for her to do so?  Hmm....here in Georgia, you'd get thrown in jail for that. 

 

I would probably handle it like we handle everything else we would not do ourselves when we see others doing them in public: smoking, getting drunk, etc.  I've always told my kids they can ask me anything, and they do, but that they should do so in private so as not to confront or embarrass the person who sparked the question.

 

Our standard has always been what Jesus said: "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault".  So, I always ask the kids: "I he/she *sinning* against *you*", which is another way of saying is it serious and is it your business?

 

We don't take people to task for doing things we find annoying, or things that don't affect us.  Lots of different opinions and preferences in the world, and we're not in charge of telling everyone else what to do.

 

If it's truly serious, and it is affecting you, then follow Jesus' instructions and ask the person to stop one on one privately.  Be kind, and don't embarrass them.  The goal is to live at peace with everyone. 

 

I don't think the world should reform itself to a 24/7 "G" rating for the sake of my kids, but I also don't appreciate it when people cuss a blue streak in front of my five year old in the check out line.  It wasn't fun trying to explain to my little boy what "F***" means.  I wish everyone could just show some reasonable consideration on both sides.

 

Georgia Mom

 

 

[abba12]

For us modesty is much more about a certain mindset and respect for ones self, much less on the legalism that my sons should never see b00bies, because I think the other party have a responsibility to control their thoughts as well. The fact is, with certain family members with views different to ours, our girls have already seen more than I'd like them to (FIL has absolutely no issues walking around in underwear when the children and I are present. There's nothing creepy to it, he has always done it, I don't like it but I can't very well tell him what to wear in his own house, though dh might have a word with him this summer now the girls are older)

 

Nudity is not the issue, context is. B00bies aren't wrong, devaluing and sexualizing yourself is (in our opinion). even if its done without intent, like my FIL or girls wearing bikinis without any thought of the skin they're showing. The kids will see me topless trying to feed baby very soon and its a non issue.

 

So for how we would handle it... We might discuss why we think she chooses to do that, we might discuss the difference between laws and our own standards, there's other topics it would bring up, and then we would move on just like if we saw a drunk or something like that.

[Hikin' Mama]

Wow. I must live under a rock. I did not know it was legal *anywhere* in the U.S. except for designated nude/topless areas.

I was thinking the same thing. I learn so much on this board. :)

[AimeeM]

We encourage modesty (very much so), but I wouldn't go so far as to say that we teach them to never see somebody of the opposite sex nude. We teach them to never INTENTIONALLY see a person of the opposite sex, outside of immediate family (DD12 will sometimes watch her younger brothers play in the tub while I grab things or clean up after dinner, for example, and I nurse my toddler all over the house, lol), but I would be very hesitant to make TOO big a deal out of it; lest I cause my children to be traumatized because they accidentally walk in a friend or other person using the bathroom, lol. Crap happens.

 

Now, if someone were purposefully not covering up their private areas and my children were to see that? I would tell my child why we believe they are wrong for doing so.

[Χά�ων]

Bare b00ks on a mom nursing her baby is very different than bare b00ks on an exotic dancer or adult film star, etc., etc. One is using nudity to do something totally uns*xual and the other is using nudity to be s*xually provocative. That's what I mean by context and intent

 

Soo it is OK as long as it is nonsexual? What about Rule 34?

[SadieMarie]

We are conservative Christians.  We teach our children that reasonable modesty shows respect to themselves and others.  I have refused to buy my kindergarten aged daughter certain dolls at Walmart because they were dressed like hookers.  

 

I am a liberal agnostic and refused to buy those same hooker dolls lol.

 

We don't advocate the level of covering up practiced by some Orthodox groups, but personally, I think only my husband needs to see my boobs, and it's kind of nice that we have some special areas of our bodies and our lives that are just for each other. 

 

I am also not interested in anyone other than dh and the women in the changing room at the pool seeing my boobs.

 

Breastfeeding is totally different.  I have breastfed in public, and happily support the right of all mothers to breastfeed anywhere anytime.  There's nothing provocative about that. 

 

I agree.

 

Personally, I think it's really rude for anyone to flash unwilling strangers in a provocative manner.  Anyone walking practically naked down the public road as if to say "wow, look at me", has mental issues.  It's on a level with carring a screaming boombox on your shoulder at 100 db or wearing a Nazi flag/Confederate flag/shirt that says "F U".  Legal?  Sure.  Polite?  No.  Part of civil society?  I hope not.

 

It seems more attention seeking than anything else to me too.  But I guess it if it became common it would not work for that purpose and we would all quit noticing it eventually.   I would rather see boobs than any of the other examples you mentioned.

 

How would I handle it if someone felt the need to flash her boobs at my nine year old son in public and it was legal for her to do so?  Hmm....here in Georgia, you'd get thrown in jail for that. 

 

I think that would be the case here too, excluding a breastfeeding situation.  

 

I would probably handle it like we handle everything else we would not do ourselves when we see others doing them in public: smoking, getting drunk, etc.  I've always told my kids they can ask me anything, and they do, but that they should do so in private so as not to confront or embarrass the person who sparked the question.

 

This is my approach too.  Though we have had occasions where that doesn't quite work out ("Look at that short man mom!  Look at how short he is!!" and this was in an elevator) 

 

Our standard has always been what Jesus said: "If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault".  So, I always ask the kids: "I he/she *sinning* against *you*", which is another way of saying is it serious and is it your business?

 

I just go with "It isn't really anything we need to be concerned about."

 

We don't take people to task for doing things we find annoying, or things that don't affect us.  Lots of different opinions and preferences in the world, and we're not in charge of telling everyone else what to do.

 

I try to model respectful discussions/debate of differences in opinion.  If something gets heated (usually just political discussions) I want them to see that people can disagree, sometimes very strongly and continue to care about each other. I really want them to understand that there are many differences between people in all areas of living, everything from religion to politics to music preferences ;) and that this is OK.  I freely share my values but they have family who have very different beliefs/values and I want that to be fine also.  

 

If it's truly serious, and it is affecting you, then follow Jesus' instructions and ask the person to stop one on one privately.  Be kind, and don't embarrass them.  The goal is to live at peace with everyone. 

 

Again! same here except without bringing Jesus into it.

 

I don't think the world should reform itself to a 24/7 "G" rating for the sake of my kids, but I also don't appreciate it when people cuss a blue streak in front of my five year old in the check out line.  It wasn't fun trying to explain to my little boy what "F***" means.  I wish everyone could just show some reasonable consideration on both sides.

 

I agree, reasonable consideration and civility would go a long way for all of us, especially in checkout lines.

 

Georgia Mom

 

Iowa Mom 

 

[Big Buckin' Longhorn]

I live in Austin, Texas were it is perfectly legal for anyone, male or female to be topless in public. It is common to find a topless woman or two at any of the public swimming pools. You only have to have your anus and genitalia covered up (except for Hippie Hollow where you can be totally nude). Anyway, I have one friend who is very much an activist in this area and she proudly marches downtown topless often. I have seen people sunbathing topless and even biking topless, usually more downtown and south Austin, but it is not super uncommon. I asked my activist friend if the topless law truly meant "anywhere" in public. She assured me it did and said she could ride her bike through a school zone topless and be completely legal. The only caveat is if someone is intentionally trying to create a disturbance. The example she gave was standing beside a major highway jumping up and down topless, waving a flag and basically causing such a distraction that a traffic accident could happen. I am fine with all this by the way, though I am more of a string bikini person in public and keep my no-tan lines sunbathing for my own pool.

 

I say all this to ask, how do parents who are trying to encourage modesty in their children or who raise their children not to see someone of the opposite sex undressed handle this type situation?

I have nothing to add. I just wanted to say HI, REBEL!!! Long time no see. I didn't know you'd moved to Austin. It's so great to see you.

[Danestress]

Bare b00ks on a mom nursing her baby is very different than bare b00ks on an exotic dancer or adult film star, etc., etc. One is using nudity to do something totally uns*xual and the other is using nudity to be s*xually provocative. That's what I mean by context and intent.

Ok, so what about a 47 year old Mom who just runs out to Home Depot to pick up some tomato plants and doesn't feel like wearing a top? She has no 'intent' except to pick up tomato plants and stay cool.

 

This would not be me, btw. But that's what I am thinking about with respect to this law. I think that would be illegal here, and even if it weren't, I never see men do that and would find it inappropriate if they did.

 

Assume Home Depot doesn't have a rule about shirts.

[Denise in Florida]

I will repeat that I don't have any great concern with public nudity. Or with adults making legal choices. I will also state that when an adult makes a legal choice I don't approve of I just ignore it.

 

That said.

 

Some of the above posts seem to imply nudity is a moral failing.  :huh:

 

 

Topless nudity does not necessarily equal sexuality. It is not the same category as drunkenness, or drug use, it is not an indicator of 'someone who needs attention' or lack of a job. It is just nudity.  Some people like being nude. 

 

 

[Rebel]

I have nothing to add. I just wanted to say HI, REBEL!!! Long time no see. I didn't know you'd moved to Austin. It's so great to see you.

Right back at you! *Waving* I am still in grad school in Waco, but commute three days a week. I LOVE Austin! If you ever got on facebook, look me up. 

[unsinkable]

Here we go...

[Rebel]

For the record, I have no dog in this fight. I don't want to show my saggy boobs while window shopping or anything, not to mention the sweat that would accumulate underneath if I was not wearing a bra (due to the aforementioned sagginess). I was just curious due to the recent threads on modesty how it would be handled. I'm sure there are at least a few conservative Christians in Austin.

[PinkyandtheBrains.]

Here we go...

Huh?

 

Seems mostly civil so far.

[SadieMarie]

 

Huh?

Seems mostly civil so far.

 

Yes.  Even though Georgia Mom and I are on completely different pages when it comes to politics and religion, when I read her reply I found that we really share a lot of common ground on this.  We are more in agreement than disagreement.  

 

[SadieMarie]

Well I can't assume that.  Every store that I've ever encountered requires shirts in the store.

 

But assuming it was allowed for men then it should be allowed for women.  That's how the law is worded here.  Women can be topless wherever it is allowed for men.  That seems fair to me.

 

Plus, I have seen men with bare breasts here (sorry, not trying to be mean or anything but at a certain BMI men do get them) and fair is fair.  Everyone should be wearing a shirt or it should be optional for everyone.  

[unfrumpable.]

Maybe that's why I don't see it so often here.  For one thing we don't have beaches, and it's not hot most of the year (maybe for one month in the summer).

 

I think you should give it a go next winter.

[LucyStoner]

Outside of the beach or similar, I'd really prefer that both men and women would wear shirts in public. Bonus if the shirts aren't fugly.

[AmandaVT]

VT has a weird naked law. It's illegal to get naked in public, but you can be naked in public all you want. So no stripping. I don't see nudies too often here (thankfully) but we do have an annual naked bike ride, which is fairly horrifying. Bits on bikes.....shudder. And the people who do decide to bare all are never the ones you would actually want to see in their birthday suits. 

 

Editing because I forgot to answer the original question! We don't really make a big deal about nakedness here. It's just a body. So if I encountered said bike ride with DS, I'd probably just say something like "that doesn't look too comfy to me! I would rather a layer or two of clothing between myself and the pavement" or "yes, they have on no clothes. In our family, we always dress appropriately for the occasion"

[Katy]

I once heard a boyscout story about Iowa...  where apparently it's legal to be completely nude as long as it isn't for the purposes of flashing or titillation (or at least it was in the 80's). Apparently a troop used to go on a canoe trip every year where at a certain bend of a river was a beach with a nudist camp.  Every year the scouts would canoe there and every year they got an eye full.  Like most stories involving nudists, they all wanted to tear their eyes out afterwards.

[SadieMarie]

 

I once heard a boyscout story about Iowa...  where apparently it's legal to be completely nude as long as it isn't for the purposes of flashing or titillation (or at least it was in the 80's). Apparently a troop used to go on a canoe trip every year where at a certain bend of a river was a beach with a nudist camp.  Every year the scouts would canoe there and every year they got an eye full.  Like most stories involving nudists, they all wanted to tear their eyes out afterwards.

 

There is a small (religious lol) college in Iowa that has a naked coed soccer game every year.  It is a long tradition and they keep the date and time secret to cut down on the spectators.  Apparently there is a lot of interest in watching college age athletes play naked soccer lol.  

 

When dd was three we went to Miami and of course to the beach.  We did not realize until after we parked and walked quite a way (with all our gear) that it was a nude beach.  It was pretty deserted so we figured we would just stay.  Eventually more people showed up and I wondered what dd would think about it.  SHE DIDN'T EVEN NOTICE!!!  She was having fun digging and playing in the surf and chasing seagulls and didn't seem phased at all that she was surrounded by naked people.  We also vacationed in Majorca and there were lots of women, all ages and various shapes, going topless and nobody seemed to care, including us.  I think we make way to much about it here.  

 

[Dory]

It's not like my kids have never seen bOOks anywhere before, but topless women would be a new thing in their world and they would probably stare until I reminded them to be polite. I'm sure a talk about it would happen later in the day as we tend to discuss new things every evening. We might not agree with it, but there are lots of things out there that we might not agree with. It's not our life, it's not our body, so it shouldn't matter to us. Don't stare, don't be rude, and just keep walking. I would probably avoid stopping and chatting with someone who was topless though if I had the kids with me.

I agree that breastfeeding is different. The kids have seen lots of that. The only time they were shocked by it was when a rather large bOOked lady plopped it out on the table at a restaurant, laid the baby on the table and went on with things while the kid laid there and nursed. My youngest (not my most discreet child) said loud enough for half the restaurant to hear him, "Mommy her bOOks (obviously not the actually word he used) are like TEN of yours!" I just about died of embarrassment.

[JuanitaL]

Plus, I have seen men with bare breasts here (sorry, not trying to be mean or anything but at a certain BMI men do get them) and fair is fair.  Everyone should be wearing a shirt or it should be optional for everyone.  

 

I have an older, rather voluptuous male neighbor who is pretty much without his shirt from roughly April - October. Not too long ago we were driving through our little town and a man was in the intersection scooting under a truck/trailer that had something wrong - that man (probably unintentionally) displayed nearly his entire backside. We were all like this :scared: :eek: :ack2: .

[Catwoman]

Outside of the beach or similar, I'd really prefer that both men and women would wear shirts in public. Bonus if the shirts aren't fugly.

:iagree:

 

I don't discriminate in that area, either.

 

Put some clothes on, no matter who you are.

 

Let's face it, many people don't look so great with their clothes on. Do we really want to see them walking around naked in the Home Depot? I sure don't. (And I'm sure they don't want to see me, either.)

[J-rap]

What CAN you do, really?  Just explain to your kids that some people do this, and we don't.  We went to a beach in Europe a few times where many women were topless and men wore the smallest Speedos possible.  The kids giggled at first, but then after that it was not really a big deal.  Apart from a beach, I think we all would have thought it seemed really weird (in our culture), but it's not like it's going to change my kids into nudists.  They think it's weird too!   Whatever.

[Catwoman]

Anyway, I have one friend who is very much an activist in this area and she proudly marches downtown topless often.

Is she really an activist, or is she just an exhibitionist who uses it as a handy excuse for why she's marching downtown often without wearing a top?

 

I could be totally offbase here, but if it's not particularly common for women to be topless downtown, I would suspect that your friend may be doing it mainly because she knows it will bring attention to her and make people stop and stare.

[fairfarmhand]

I once heard a boyscout story about Iowa...  where apparently it's legal to be completely nude as long as it isn't for the purposes of flashing or titillation (or at least it was in the 80's). Apparently a troop used to go on a canoe trip every year where at a certain bend of a river was a beach with a nudist camp.  Every year the scouts would canoe there and every year they got an eye full.  Like most stories involving nudists, they all wanted to tear their eyes out afterwards.

 

I'm sorry but in the context of this conversation. THIS WORD MAKES ME LAUGH!

 

[Rebel]

Is she really an activist, or is she just an exhibitionist who uses it as a handy excuse for why she's marching downtown often without wearing a top?

 

I could be totally offbase here, but if it's not particularly common for women to be topless downtown, I would suspect that your friend may be doing it mainly because she knows it will bring attention to her and make people stop and stare.

 

 

Oh, she is definitely an exhibitionist too.

[Crimson Wife]

Soo it is OK as long as it is nonsexual? What about Rule 34?

 

I don't know what that is, and something tells me I probably would regret it if I googled it.

[73349]

I don't know what that is, and something tells me I probably would regret it if I googled it.

 

IIRC, Rule 34 says that if you can think of it, p0rn has been made about it.

[Χά�ων]

I don't know what that is, and something tells me I probably would regret it if I googled it.

 

 

IIRC, Rule 34 says that if you can think of it, p0rn has been made about it.

Pretty close.

 

It is exists there IS a porn of it.

 

So no matter how modest or what the topic, someone somewhere is turned on by it and has a made a p0rn about it. 

[In2why]

I think more places should require both men and women to wear shirts.   As for the beach or pool.  Whatever works for you.  Personally I don't even like sand stuck in between my toes so I certainly wouldn't want to sit my naked backside in it.  

[Ravin]

Some people like to be nude...specially if it's hot! Topless and a big umbrella could work.

 

Random breast-related fact. A tribe in - I think - West Papua ? The mothers breastfeed orphaned monkeys. Ds and I are watching Human Planet. An awesome doco. Lots of boobs though.

 

I've always thought it was pretty ridiculous that basic cable can show people in traditional societies with no shirts, but not people in Western societies. Um...kind of racist double standard the FCC had going on there, since the rule holds even for non-s*x'l nudity based on WHO was wearing the clothes. 

 

Yeah growing up I had a male friend who had a chest much larger than mine.  Including very large nipples.  Sorry if I make anyone hurl, but it was true.  I used to think it quite unfair that he could sit there topless on a hot day, but I could not.

 

Could we please not talk about people with non standard bodies this way (with vomiting references)? Whether from weight or hormone imbalances, it's not unheard of for men to have breast growth, that is true. It is a reality that neither detracts from their male status nor deserves derision, any more than women should be made fun of because of the size of their mammaries.

 

I love nude beaches. And I have no problem with people doing non-s*x'l things in public topless or without clothes on. I figure if it offends someone's religious sensibilities, they should learn to avert their gaze.

[Catwoman]

... And I have no problem with people doing non-s*x'l things in public topless or without clothes on. I figure if it offends someone's religious sensibilities, they should learn to avert their gaze.

I can't speak for anyone else, but in my case, "religious sensibilities" has nothing to do with it.

 

There are a lot of incredibly unattractive people out there and no, I do not wish to see them naked. I don't want to see the incredibly attractive, semi-attractive, or not particularly attractive people walking around naked, either. For crying out loud, how hard is it to put on some clothes?

 

I don't want to see anyone naked at the supermarket or at Target or jogging on the streets.

 

You may feel differently, but please don't think everyone is against public nudity for religious reasons. I am sure you are a lovely person and you know I like you, but I still don't want to walk downtown and sit around at a coffee shop with you if you're naked. :D

[HRAAB]

Outside of the beach or similar, I'd really prefer that both men and women would wear shirts in public. Bonus if the shirts aren't fugly.

 

I don't feel strongly about it one way or the other.  It is what it is, a human body.  I wouldn't be upset if my girls saw someone topless.  But I prefer people wear tops, too.

 

We had some workmen at our house, and my 16 yr old dd and I were sitting on the couch in front of our living room window giving us a clear view of the front yard.  One of the young (20ish) workmen walked over in front of the window, took off his shirt, and stretched.  Every few minutes he would saunter back in front of the window (he's on the sidewalk right in front of the window), get a drink, stretch, look around, and go back to work.  He knew we were watching him.  After the 3rd time, my dd says she's not going to be his audience any longer and left.  I found the whole thing hilarious.

[albeto.]

It's legal here, but I have yet to see anyone do it.

 

But I have to ask.  Why are men's boobs/chest ok to look at, but not women's?  I don't understand why this should be a big issue.  It's just a body.  People don't know what bodies look like?  KWIM?

 

To me all this hyper focusing on this issue is what makes it weird, obscene, dirty, etc.  It's just a body. 

 

History.

 

Free the nipple aims to decriminalize a woman's body. This link is an article in the Huffington Post (sorry). It should go without saying this like is NSFW (because... nipples). 

 

The documentary, This Film Is Not Yet Rated explores some of this discrepancy in the movie industry. Nipples, sex, and the F-bomb are censored far more than violence. The F-bomb as used as an expression of anger or aggression is not censored nearly as much as when it's used as a euphemism for sex. Pubic shots are out, even in romantic scenes with two consenting adults. 

[Ravin]

I can't speak for anyone else, but in my case, "religious sensibilities" has nothing to do with it.

 

There are a lot of incredibly unattractive people out there and no, I do not wish to see them naked. I don't want to see the incredibly attractive, semi-attractive, or not particularly attractive people walking around naked, either. For crying out loud, how hard is it to put on some clothes?

 

I don't want to see anyone naked at the supermarket or at Target or jogging on the streets.

 

You may feel differently, but please don't think everyone is against public nudity for religious reasons. I am sure you are a lovely person and you know I like you, but I still don't want to walk downtown and sit around at a coffee shop with you if you're naked. :D

The OP asked about reconciling living where there's public nudity with modesty. You're feelings aren't based on that from the sound of it. People shouldn't have to base their mode of dress on the subjective opinions of others of what's attractive. That's kind of the opposite of modesty--using clothing to hide the flaws in the body they have for reasons rooted in vanity and great of being judged.

[Ravin]

Soo it is OK as long as it is nonsexual? What about Rule 34?

Is the person in public doing whatever making a po%n video? No. So it's fine. "Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."