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A thought about Mother's Day


Alicia64
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I did not have a close relationship with my mom. . . so feel free to take this w/ a grain of salt. Around Mother's Day -- when I was young -- one of the kids would inevitably ask, "Why isn't there a Kids' Day?" And my lovely mom would bark back, "Because every day is kids day around here!!!"

 

She didn't say it in a nice way at all.

 

So when my boys ask the same question i usually answer, "You know, you're right. There should be a Kids' Day."

 

But, also around Mother's Day I make a point of saying to my boys, "Well, really, every day is Mother's Day because I'm so lucky to have you two in my life. I love being a mom."

 

Alley

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I am not a huge fan of Mother's Day and I don't make a big deal about it.  But I do think there is something to be said for allowing this day to be about moms, without making it about "where's MY day" for everyone else too.  Most kids do enjoy giving to their moms.  We as parents get to be the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus and the one who buys stuff for them all the time. Giving the kids a chance to be the be the ones to do the planning and giving and delighting is not a bad thing.

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I am not a huge fan of Mother's Day and I don't make a big deal about it.  But I do think there is something to be said for allowing this day to be about moms, without making it about "where's MY day" for everyone else too.  Most kids do enjoy giving to their moms.  We as parents get to be the Easter Bunny and Santa Claus and the one who buys stuff for them all the time. Giving the kids a chance to be the be the ones to do the planning and giving and delighting is not a bad thing.

 

Poppy -- I'm not suggesting -- at all -- that Mother's Day and a focus on moms is a bad thing. My boys are excited to bring me breakfast in bed (their idea) and make cards.

 

I was just sharing how my ding-dong mom reacted to us kids. So I purposely react positively to the idea of Kids' Day and Mother's Day. I just wanted to share.

 

Alley

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Alley, I'm glad you posted this and I love Mother's Day.

 

A phrase I frequently heard when my mom was angry with me was, "I hope when you grow up, you have a little girl just like yourself!" and I was terrified that it would come out of my own mouth in a fit of anger.

 

I made a point of saying it to dd in a loving voice with a smile on my face when we were having a particularly good day. She's 25 and I still haven't said it to her in anger yet. I know that's anecdotal, but I think it's how we break the cycle of hurt children hurting children.

 

 

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Alley, I'm glad you posted this and I love Mother's Day.

 

A phrase I frequently heard when my mom was angry with me was, "I hope when you grow up, you have a little girl just like yourself!" and I was terrified that it would come out of my own mouth in a fit of anger.

 

I made a point of saying it to dd in a loving voice with a smile on my face when we were having a particularly good day. She's 25 and I still haven't said it to her in anger yet. I know that's anecdotal, but I think it's how we break the cycle of hurt children hurting children.

 

Iron Ethel Flint -- that is so sweet that you say that sentence in a nice way to your daughter.

 

It's amazing the mean comments that parents make. . . that last a lifetime.

 

Dana -- :grouphug:

 

Alley

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I'm not much into holidays.  They usually just reminds me how small my family is.  I try to make the most of them for my kids, but if it weren't for them I probably wouldn't even acknowledge the day.

 

Dh is sweet though.  He just offered to grill me something.  This is a lot coming from a guy who has probably cooked fewer than 5 times in his life.  He never touches the grill either. 

 

Sparkly -- Same here. Not a lot of family. Your DH is sweet.

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I have a similar sentiment.  I feel blessed to be a mom to my kids, every day!  Right now I only do Mother's Day to honor my mom and to play along with my kids' efforts at making a fuss over me.  ;)  They are too young to understand why we honor mothers.  They think their bedtime kiss is the most important thing I do for them.  :)

 

I think my kids tried that "kids' day" argument, and I said we have many celebrations focused on kids, most notably Christmas, Easter, Halloween, etc.  Would they rather have only *one* day that focuses on making kids happy?  We could do that!  They backed off.  ;)

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I'm a Military Mom, so of course I want a historically accurate Julia Ward Howe style Mother's Peace Day with signs and marches and everyone holding hands and singing "Kumbaya" after the President comes on national TV to say that the dirty rotten hippies are right so he's bringing all the kids home from Iraq and fixing their boo-boos and giving them free tie dyed T shirts and tickets to the next Phish concert with the money he'd planned on using for making more bombs.

 

That's the one thing ds1 can't give me, so he's really overdone the Hallmark style gifts in the past and even gave me a $200 gift certificate to a spa one year.

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I did not have a close relationship with my mom. . . so feel free to take this w/ a grain of salt. Around Mother's Day -- when I was young -- one of the kids would inevitably ask, "Why isn't there a Kids' Day?" And my lovely mom would bark back, "Because every day is kids day around here!!!"

 

She didn't say it in a nice way at all.

 

So when my boys ask the same question i usually answer, "You know, you're right. There should be a Kids' Day."

 

But, also around Mother's Day I make a point of saying to my boys, "Well, really, every day is Mother's Day because I'm so lucky to have you two in my life. I love being a mom."

 

Alley

 

I think this is awesome!

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Alley, I'm glad you posted this and I love Mother's Day.

 

A phrase I frequently heard when my mom was angry with me was, "I hope when you grow up, you have a little girl just like yourself!" and I was terrified that it would come out of my own mouth in a fit of anger.

 

I made a point of saying it to dd in a loving voice with a smile on my face when we were having a particularly good day. She's 25 and I still haven't said it to her in anger yet. I know that's anecdotal, but I think it's how we break the cycle of hurt children hurting children.

 

I am going to do this today....what a lovely way to break hurt....

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I always thought there was a Kids' Day.

 

Ah, yes, Universal Children's Day - Nov 20th. It's focus is a little different than how Mother's Day focuses on moms, but it is a real holiday.

 

Sorry your mom was not nice about it. Nice to hear you are. You can mark the 20th on your calendar. :)

I thought it was in August - August 3rd.

 

http://www.kidspeace.org/nationalkidsday.aspx

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Alley, I'm glad you posted this and I love Mother's Day.

 

A phrase I frequently heard when my mom was angry with me was, "I hope when you grow up, you have a little girl just like yourself!" and I was terrified that it would come out of my own mouth in a fit of anger.

 

I made a point of saying it to dd in a loving voice with a smile on my face when we were having a particularly good day. She's 25 and I still haven't said it to her in anger yet. I know that's anecdotal, but I think it's how we break the cycle of hurt children hurting children.

 

Okay, I did say something similar to my daughter today, at what seemed like an appropriate time.  She looked at me and said, "Mom, that would be a little creepy."       :huh:

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There actually is the International Children's Day, June 1st, and it was celebrated in my home country when I grew up - we even did something special in school.

In Korea, Children's Day, May 5, is a national holiday. Korean families in my area celebrate it.

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I love being a Mother.  I adore my children, my husband and my life.   With that said, a perfect Mothers Day for me would be a day completely alone.  I would stay at a hotel where I could sleep until I actually wanted to wake up.  Eat when I was hungry whatever I wanted.  Read a book, get a massage, or whatever my selfish little heart desired.  I wouldn't have anyone ask me any questions, I wouldn't need to take anyone else feelings into account.  It would be quiet and peaceful.  I could put on makeup, and heels or stay in a bathrobe all day.  I could take a bubble bath until the water got cold.   I think every Mom deserves that day at least once a year and then in my perfect world I could return to my glorious, wonderful, messy, loud, perfect life again.  

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