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It's hard for me to post this because it makes it much more real.


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We lost in court. As of Thursday this week we are no longer legal guardians of our 16 year old ds. We are devastated. It boiled down to his wishes. We learned at his age his wishes supersede ours, even a 16 yr old with significant special needs. It made no difference that the very fact that he wanted to "divorce" us points to his Reactive Attachment Disorder. It makes no difference that my husband and I were not identified as being bad parents.

 

I feel like I've run a marathon. Thursday my body felt like it had been physically pummelled. Today I'm just tired. The stress hasn't helped my fibromyalgia.

 

It's painful to think about good memories. It's painful to think of the bad times.

 

Apparently the decision is reversible but contingent on him. Of course I know we are still his parents.

 

Actually it still feels unreal.

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Thanks for all your kindness. He has said he wants no contact. I have to believe that won't be forever. He does respond to texts from my extended family so he hasn't cut all ties.

 

Adoption councillor told us in her experience RAD kids don't usually see the light until they're young adults.

 

I don't know exactly where he lives but social worker in contact with him said I can send letters etc through her.

 

We had to sign a paper. I couldn't stop crying as i recalled signing for his adoption so many years ago and such a happy occasion.

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You know, if it wasn't happening to us I wouldn't believe the things we've experienced. I feel like a made for TV movie. I keep thinking back to all things we could have, should have, would have done differently with our poor broken boy. But we didn't know how broken he was.

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