Jump to content

Menu

I like your cellulite.


Miss Peregrine
 Share

Recommended Posts

my dh will say I have the prettiest big blue eye which is sweet but not to long ago for I guess trying to same something else nice said my eyes look like  catfish eyes  :huh: I gave him a funny look and ask did you just compare my eyes to catfish  and he was trying to express how big my eyes are and catfish came to mind  :rofl:  romantic and a poet he is not !

 

I now just to pick on him  will ask  are my catfish eyes looking good today !  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My whole extended family still laughes about the time my aunt got her hair cut and when she came home to show my uncle his response was "Did you ask them to do that?" When she replied yes, she did he retorted "well you make a very nice looking romulan"  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Some of these are quite hilarious.

 

:iagree: but Swellmomma's takes the cake...honestly I was laughing out loud for a good five minutes last night. Ds kept asking me what was so funny. I said, oh, just stuff not to say to your partner :lol:

 

My whole extended family still laughes about the time my aunt got her hair cut and when she came home to show my uncle his response was "Did you ask them to do that?" When she replied yes, she did he retorted "well you make a very nice looking romulan"  

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Once I went shopping with my mom & my sister. My DH asked what time I would be home, I didn't exactly know but told him as soon as I could. He looked at me skeptically and said "Ok, but just know that *I* would never leave you home alone with the kids all day."

 

As a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom, I guess me and the kids disappear when he goes to work M-F. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

:iagree: but Swellmomma's takes the cake...honestly I was laughing out loud for a good five minutes last night. Ds kept asking me what was so funny. I said, oh, just stuff not to say to your partner :lol:

 

 

Deanna_Troi_Romulan_sm.jpg

 

 

yup, that's the look.  She thought she was going very sleek and chic lol  She has kept it much longer since then lol

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Once I went shopping with my mom & my sister. My DH asked what time I would be home, I didn't exactly know but told him as soon as I could. He looked at me skeptically and said "Ok, but just know that *I* would never leave you home alone with the kids all day."

 

As a stay-at-home, homeschooling mom, I guess me and the kids disappear when he goes to work M-F.

My DH would totally say this!! He has been known to try and tell me how hard it is to get anything done when he is alone with the kids... Ya freaking think!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

When I was trying on some trendy boots in the store, my DH walks up and says we better head home instead of wasting time at the store. He looked at the boots and said "You would have looked great in them 10 years ago. What is the point of wearing them at this time?". I am not even middle aged yet.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

After my second child I lost a bunch of weight and weighed 135 lbs, the smallest I've ever been.  Then I had 2 back to back pregnancies. One resulted in a miscarriage halfway through, and I got pregnant again within 3 months of the miscarriage so they were very back to back with a lot of depression eating/drinking in the 3 months prior to becoming pregnant again.  At 9 months pregnant I weighed 190 lbs and was not happy about ALL the hard work I put into losing weigh being for nothing.  The kids were looking at pictures and dh says "hey look its skinny mommy!"

 

He didn't mean anything negatively about it.  When I was skinny I even referred to myself as skinny mommy but to say that to a 190 lb woman who is 9 months pregnant wasn't the smartest thing!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Can I add a new category?

"What not to say/do while wife is in labor with YOUR child..."

 

1. Eat a chicken sandwich with garlic mayo on it over her head :ack2: (while she is in the hospital bed none the less. oh and has not eaten for like 12 hours. He got kicked out, by the nurse. Normally I love those sandwiches, but right then.... :blink: )

2. Say" My you've added some more gray hairs right there up front" .... :glare:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Can I add a new category?

"What not to say/do while wife is in labor with YOUR child..."

 

1. Eat a chicken sandwich with garlic mayo on it over her head :ack2: (while she is in the hospital bed none the less. oh and has not eaten for like 12 hours. He got kicked out, by the nurse. Normally I love those sandwiches, but right then.... :blink: )

2. Say" My you've added some more gray hairs right there up front" .... :glare:

 

Hmmm, not quite during labor but I suppose kinda.  This was while I was sitting on the toilet during a miscarriage, it was about an hour into being on the toilet (I sat on it for 4 hours because I had intense contractions the entire time and it was the only comfortable place to be.)  " Can I turn Breaking Bad on you can see it from the toilet."  I got so mad at him when he said this because it sounded like the most selfish thing ever as if he were bored with my miscarriage.  But I said sure because I was so mad I didn't want him talking to me anymore. Surprisingly, it distracted me quite a bit from the pain of the next 3 hours.

 

He later explained that he asked because he thought I'd want background noise and thats what we were watching before we realized I was miscarrying and he knows music does not distract me.  Well he knows me better than I know myself in situations like that.  P.S.  we also watched American Horror Story while i was in labor with my youngest... The entire first season.  I labored for 72 hours!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Can I add a new category?

"What not to say/do while wife is in labor with YOUR child..."

 

1. Eat a chicken sandwich with garlic mayo on it over her head :ack2: (while she is in the hospital bed none the less. oh and has not eaten for like 12 hours. He got kicked out, by the nurse. Normally I love those sandwiches, but right then.... :blink: )

2. Say" My you've added some more gray hairs right there up front" .... :glare:

My husband made the huge mistake of saying he was hungry (several times) halfway through one of my labors... I didn't even say anything until the end of my next pregnancy. Now he knows not to say a word about hunger, food or that he's going to get some food. He'll say he's going to call someone or get something from his truck. I don't care if he eats, but just don't talk about it.

 

Also don't talk about how exhausted you are after the birth... Are you kidding me???

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also don't talk about how exhausted you are after the birth... Are you kidding me???

:iagree:

DD7 was born during NBA playoff season (or it might have been college, I don't pay attention to it, some sport anyways and it was spring). Anyways, after she was born (still in the delivery room mind ya) "man I hope the room has a better tv so I can watch the next game and It was kind of noisy in here this afternoon hopefully that floor will be quieter" Gee YA THINK... I was just GIVING BIRTH TO YOUR DAUGHTER! :001_rolleyes:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have a very expressive face and do not *always* hide my thoughts and feelings well. When Dh and I were dating we were eating and having great conversation he kept laughing. I told him he sure laughs a lot and he replied, "we'll you would too if you looked at your face all the time!" Hmmmm. :-) he explained himself (which sounded a lot like hole digging), but it was kinda funny. We still joke about it.

Although this IS the guy who, when I'd made homemade chocolate-chip cookies for him early in our dating relationship, told me, "They're good. I like my grandma's better." Nice. Later he explained he said that because he felt that our relationship was going really well and if we were going to be "in it for the long haul" he wanted to be honest with me. It's our 10 year wedding anniversary this summer and I still make the cookies he likes. The recipe is in my file and labeled "I Like My Grandma's Better Chocolate Chip Cookies". :-)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If I criticize myself he usually says "hey now, no talking about my wife like that."

 

I say this to James Bond all the time.  Though sometimes I change it up just for fun and say "Hey, I'm the only one allowed to talk about my husband like that."

 

I know he's said some crazy stuff, but I can't think of any off the top of my head, other than after Indy was born when he said "Wow, I'm glad that's over.  I'm exhausted."  I just gave him the death glare.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not something he said wrong, but in the vein of funny DH comments during labor--

 

I gave birth to our fourth child on Monday night. As his head was crowning, dh leaned over and said, "Hm. The child appears to be African-American." He broke up the entire delivery room into giggles--even me, when the contraction ended. (Granted, the baby was a very dark purplish color at the time.)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

congratulations

Not something he said wrong, but in the vein of funny DH comments during labor--

I gave birth to our fourth child on Monday night. As his head was crowning, dh leaned over and said, "Hm. The child appears to be African-American." He broke up the entire delivery room into giggles--even me, when the contraction ended. (Granted, the baby was a very dark purplish color at the time.)

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I bought a sturdy leather smallish purse for walking around the city. I put it on the other night on my way out and DH said," Nice little man bag you've got there."

Grrr. So much for me being hip and city like.

Maybe you should ask, "Do you want to borrow it?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My whole extended family still laughes about the time my aunt got her hair cut and when she came home to show my uncle his response was "Did you ask them to do that?" When she replied yes, she did he retorted "well you make a very nice looking romulan"  

 

That's more creative than my spouse's reply after I got a short, short haircut!

 

Me: Well?

Him, dryly: Looks like mine.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

These are so funny!  

 

 

I say this to James Bond all the time.  Though sometimes I change it up just for fun and say "Hey, I'm the only one allowed to talk about my husband like that."

 

I know he's said some crazy stuff, but I can't think of any off the top of my head, other than after Indy was born when he said "Wow, I'm glad that's over.  I'm exhausted."  I just gave him the death glare.  

 

I would've given him that look, too!  The other day when I gave ds17 the death glare, ds19 told me that I was the only person in the world who could convey an entire sentence with a single look.  I said, "No, dear.  Most moms have that amazing gift."  

 

My dh has taken to answering " How do I look?" with " You look age appropriate." Grrrrr. In his defense my taste in most things skews young while his skews grandpa. He's not over my last concert outfit.

 

Haha!  When dh (who doesn't think anyone should assume he's anywhere near grandpa age) and I were walking in the neighborhood the other day, a little boy pointed to dh's shoes and said, "My Papa Rick has those shoes!" His mom smiled sweetly and said, "Papa Rick is his grandpa."  Dh muttered under his breath, "I used to like that kid."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not something he said wrong, but in the vein of funny DH comments during labor--

 

I gave birth to our fourth child on Monday night. As his head was crowning, dh leaned over and said, "Hm. The child appears to be African-American." He broke up the entire delivery room into giggles--even me, when the contraction ended. (Granted, the baby was a very dark purplish color at the time.)

Just wanted to say congrats on #4!

 

And I think we need to start a "Things your husband said during childbirth" thread

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...