Garga Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Before I had kids, I worked at a job as a corporate trainer. This mean that if anyone didn't understand something about their job, they would come to me for help. I was interrupted all day long every day. Constantly. I hated it. I used to work on Saturdays, on purpose, just so I could Get Something Done. When I was pregnant and knew I was quitting I used to sigh happily and look forward to the day that I would be at home with no more interruptions. Oh, it would be great. Think of all the things I would get done. And I can hear you all laughing now. Kids interrupt! All day! Nonstop! I don't think I've gotten a single task done as a stay at home parent in the last 11.5 years without at least 581 interruptions. In fact, I haven't had a complete thought without an interruption during that time. Oh, to be able to sit and think a full thought from start to finish without someone cutting in to tell me how long they had to stretch during their karate lesson. So...I'll have to look ahead to when the kids grow up and move out and maybe then there will be no more interruptions. By then, my dh will retire and probably interrupt me all day long, too! :tongue_smilie: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gaillardia Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 You're funny. Maybe you'll interrupt him all day long because he'll be doing his projects and you'll be wanting him to play. It will get better! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirty ethel rackham Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Sorry to say that, by then, senior moments will interrupt your ... What was I going to say again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Excelsior! Academy Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 I agree!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
school17777 Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 I know exactly how you feel! I can't even go the bathroom alone. Dh, the youngest, and/or the dog follows me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Acadie Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 Same here. I think I need to make a sign or get some beads to hang on the office door, to signal when I'm not to be interrupted except for emergency. I seriously think it's taking a toll on my mental health not to have better boundaries in place, and that it's a concept I need to introduce to my children and spouse. Hubby opened the (closed) office door when I was doing an online yoga video last night, and it totally messed with the flow of my practice because I thought he was coming in for some important reason…. Nope, once I'd wrenched myself out of the pose to face him, he just wanted to see how it was going! And dd11 once popped her head in the same closed door to tell me I looked like a zombie. Love you my dears, but there are times when I am busy and don't want your check-in or input. But please know you can count on me whenever your hair is on fire or the house is falling into a sinkhole. Amy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trulycrabby Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 "There's mom, she's not doing anything; she's just sitting on the sofa with a book. Let's go talk to her!" :ack2: My revenge is to go sit by DS10 and DH while they are playing video games/internet chess and start talking to them. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted April 15, 2014 Share Posted April 15, 2014 If it is any comfort, you'll kind of miss it when they grow into teenagers and stop talking to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jenny in Florida Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 If it is any comfort, you'll kind of miss it when they grow into teenagers and stop talking to you. Hold on: My teenagers are supposed to stop talking to me? Mine are 16 and 19, and each is still perfectly capable of talking my ears off every day! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyontheFarm Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I know exactly how you feel! I can't even go the bathroom alone. Dh, the youngest, and/or the dog follows me. My favorite time of the day is in the middle of the night, because I can go to the bathroom alone, no one bothers me, interrupts me or asks me a question. The moon is rather quite lovely, too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myeightkiddies Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Many homeschooling moms implement a quiet time each day. The children may use that time to work on a hobby, read, finish independent school work, nap, etc. However, they must be in their rooms and quiet. This includes no coming out to ask mom questions or get food or watch TV/computer or talk/argue/fight with each other, etc. They are only allowed out if they need to use the bathroom (but must immediately return to their room) or if an emergency. If you did this daily for at least an hour, it may give you that peace that you are seeking. It doesn't hurt for them to have some quiet time to rest and do whatever it is that they don't seem to have time to complete. I'm sure the first week will be trying at first, but stay firm. It should become a routine and hopefully a positive time of day for you. If they share a room, alternate days on who gets to stay in the bedroom and who can be in mom's room. Mom will just have to find another place to relax, but at least there will be some time to relax. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
plansrme Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Hold on: My teenagers are supposed to stop talking to me? Mine are 16 and 19, and each is still perfectly capable of talking my ears off every day! Well, in my house, the 16 yo leaves at 7:45 am M-F, and we do not see her again until 9:45 pm. Though she might still be capable of talking my ear off in theory, in practice, if it were not for illicit texts during the school day, I would have no idea what was going on in her world. Thank goodness for texting. My 14 year old, on the other hand, is only capable of talking about swimming and her practice and her teammates and her coach and what the pool smelled like and how the new suit is working out and what the set was like in practice and how cold the water was. . .. Oh well, it's better than talking about boys! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danestress Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 This is probably something I could have written on in the thread about what you wished you had known at 30. I wish I had known how to vigilantly protect myself from constant interruptions by refusing to be the family data bank and "go to" person for everything. About five years ago, I realized that at least half of this interruption problem is failure to train my husband and kids. So I tried to stop making it so easy for them. When my husband would ask, "Do we have milk?" I just didn't answer. He actually knows where to find out if we have milk. There is only one place milk could be in our house. When he would say, "How do I get to X place?" I started saying, "Google it." Because really, it would take more of my time to explain how to get there than for him to put it in his map app and when he has been there six times, there is no reason for me to be the expert in this. When my kids would ask, "Do we have scissors?" I would tell them to look around. We have about six pairs of scissors. If they look in two or three different drawers, they will find them, and I am not someone who puts things in their exact spot, so I also only know where the scissors are if I look. I stopped answering dumb questions, I started telling people to "scan" when they asked where things were in the refrigerator. I stopped keeping track of all details that other people felt they shouldn't have to trouble their busy and important brains with. I still get interrupted a lot, but I think about the necessity of those interruptions more. I am someone who really struggles to multitask, and interruptions actually make me lose my own train of thoughts. When kids ask me permission to do things, I am more likely to tell them to ask their Dad. I don't want to be the person who always gets asked everything. I don't want to be the "family brain" who is supposed to keep track of where things are and when things start. I don't want to decide dumb things that other people can decide, like what Tupperware to put leftovers in, whether to wear shorts or slacks, etc etc. It's starting to pay off. When kids are little, a lot of interruptions are just part of life. But as they get older, I really want them to see that I value my own peace, time, and train of thought, and I think some of that, in my house at least, is about me simply not making it easier for people to ask then to find their own answer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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