Level with me about virtual schools.

[AMDG]

First a quick backstory! We homeschooled last year for K, and then began HSing for 1st, but I had a baby who required serious medical treatment, and now has a disability. We had to put my son in the 1st grade in order to care for my daughter and two other young sons at home. 

 

Having DS in school is not the ideal for so many reasons, but the way we had our homeschool before, with very rigorous, teacher-centered curriculum, is not be an option for several years. DH and I have talked about an online school for 2nd grade, but the websites I've looked at say that parent involvement takes 3 hours a day.

 

I don't have 3 hours a day to devote to homeschooling. If I did, we'd be homeschooling!

 

Will someone level with me about the involvement and hand-holding for an online school? 

 

Also, please don't comment with "get him out of school now.." etc. Our situation is very complex, and we're trying to do the best we can for each of the kids, keep our daughter healthy, and keep me, at a minimum, a decent mother. Our hope and desire is to return to homeschooling when/if it is feasible and the best thing for the whole family.

 

Thanks! 

[OneStepAtATime]

If you don't have 3 hours a day to devote to homeschooling your second grader then keeping him in a regular school may be the better option for now, depending on what the issues are with the regular school.  I can't think of any virtual schools for second graders that don't require parental involvement that are worth anything.  Maybe someone else has a suggestion, though.  

 

I do understand where you are coming from in a way.  Big hugs.  I am sorry you are facing this.  While our situations are different, the need ended up being the same.  My father died in the middle of restructuring his company and left my mother and I to restructure and run his business.  It was a huge mess legally and financially that was affecting a lot of people so we had no choice but to work like crazy to fix everything.  While trying to do so, I was facing a lot of health issues of my own (cancer) and my daughter was diagnosed with several learning issues and was struggling terribly in school. I was spending all my day hours working the business, all my afternoons/evenings tutoring my daughter and my nights taking care of the house, the personal bills, etc..  My son, who had always thrived in a brick and mortar suddenly had a HORRIBLE second grade year and we ended up having to pull him out right in the middle (he was already showing signs of PTSD).  I did not have much time to homeschool him at all (and honestly knew almost nothing about homeschooling since we really hadn't planned to).  I signed up my son for Time for Learning.  He started the second grade level from the beginning even though he had already completed over half of second grade in a brick and mortar.  He blew through the entire curriculum in 3 months.  I also had him continue the material from his former school since it just didn't seem like Time for Learning was terribly robust or gave him enough depth and practice.  In looking for other options for the following year I just couldn't find anything with any depth that didn't require a lot of parental involvement so stepping back from the business and homeschooling with more involvement from me became a necessity.   

 

There ARE some DVD based curriculums for specific topics that MIGHT be usable in your situation.  If you are interested in those, I could mention the ones I have come across.  Not sure how many would work for a 2nd grader, though....

 

I wish I had good options for you.  Hopefully someone else will chime in with some good suggestions.  But unless the local public school is really pretty bad, you all might be better with him remaining there, at least until he is a bit older and more independent.  If that ends up being the case, don't feel bad.  A lot of great kids have great experiences in a standard school setting.  

[bluedarling]

I have tried a state K12 program.  It was less work than I had been doing, but more work than some other things I have tried (in the middle).  Of my 3 children who tried it, it worked well for one.  The other two shut down completely.  The child who liked it did well because he read well and tested out of doing any work....he admittedly did not retain anything, though.

 

My suggestion would be something like ACE (School of Tomorrow) or Starline Press (secular look alike).  They are not "ideal", but they are very independent.  You need only check each day that everything was completed and scored (and preferably be present for tests.)  They aren't "rigorous" at the younger ages, but my children enjoyed them,and they got done.  They learned more with this method than with K12, and it was easier on me.  My boys felt the science was lacking (argued the information was oversimplified to the point of being wrong), but that was their only complaint.  (We used ACE with all, and now I have one child using the similar Starline Press for a secular option.)  The curriculum became significantly more challenging at the high school level (to the point my oldest could not use it.)

[dsmith]

I'm only familiar with K12, which we did independently in 2nd grade. It easily took 3 - 4 hours a day. I don't know what your ds is like, but mine needed me to be right there actively teaching and helping him at that age. Yes, there were parts of a lesson that were online, but most of it was done offline. If we couldn't home school we would probably have ds in a school for kids on the spectrum or in a private school. He did very well in a private Montessori school, but we couldn't afford the $8000/yr tuition after 2 years, and put him in Catholic school. That was ok for 1 1/2 years, but it became necessary to pull him out in 2nd. Public school was never an option with ds: we knew he couldn't handle it. I don't know if your son is in public school or not, but if he is, perhaps a small private school would be an option? I've considered paying a tutor to work with ds, especially when we clash. Maybe a mother's helper could allow you the time to homeschool? Good luck! 

[AMDG]

Thank you for your honesty and input. Truly. 

 

I appreciate the affirmation to keep him in school knowing our difficult situation. The school is a public school. There are things I like about it, there are plenty of things I don't, but he IS learning. His handwriting and reading flourished this year, as I would have hoped in the 1st grade. He is quite gifted in math, but sadly he is doing very basic 1st grade math this year. I don't appreciate the backgrounds and behaviors of some of the other students, but try to stay calm when I hear about it at the end of the day. Again, it's not ideal, but necessary. 

 

My heart just aches sometimes looking over the beautiful books from last year, all the Jim Weiss CD's we'd listen to in the car, etc. He comes home and is too tired and wants to play. I grieve that part of homeschooling. Brick and mortar schools are like full time jobs for these kiddos, and I wanted leisure and time to learn about the richness of culture for my young children. These are my romantic ideas about homeschooling which are not a part of our (stressful) reality at this time, but again, perhaps something I can return to before the public school does too much damage ;-) . 

 

 

 

 

[Scarlett]

I skimmed your thread, but I think I gather you are mourning the loss of the education you planned to give your son.  Is that a fair assessment?

 

I would encourage you to not think that is lost forever.  He is only in second grade and if he is an advanced child he will float along nicely for a few years in public school until your life settles down a bit and/or he is to the age he can be more independent in school work at home. 

 

(((Hugs)))

 

Edited to add---if there are PROBLEMS in school...bullying etc.  my opinion will change.  A minimal homeschool education at 2nd grade is better than any child enduring harrassment or bullying or unsafe conditions.

[Ameena]

Honestly - it's 2nd grade. Unless you have a kiddo who needs extra help  / work - I'd unschool for a year or two. Read good books, maybe watch some educational DVD's like Magic School Bus, and let them play around on an old PC with educational games if possible.

 

A year or two of unschooling won't hurt them academically unless they have delays already or are the type of kid who forgets everything the instant they finish with it.

 

Sonlight can be done in an unschool-ish manner, and still be fairily strong academically. Read books at bedtime, while in the car, etc. My dd is 7, 2nd grade as well. It takes us anywhere from a hour to 3 hours tops to do Sonlight core B, math, handwriting, science & english. Normally it's about 45 minutes to an hour. Read alouds & independent reading we do at bedtime or while waiting for appointments / bus / etc instead of during school. I could probably trim it down to maybe 1.5 hours a day tops if I swapped out math, english & science for something like ACE.

 

All this is said with the presumption that said child isn't happy in PS, and neither are you. If he is - well then a couple years of public school won't hurt him.

[MomatHWTK]

2nd grade might be a little different, but for my 3rd grader I am using Explode the Code online and Dreambox math- both of which he can do independently.  My Pre-K will start up Starfall.com and do the math games there independently. 

 

When the kids are doing computer learning, I am usually in the room (or checking frequently) to make sure the work gets done, but not actually instructing. BrianPop, Jr. and Clever Dragons offer independent learning as well.  We supplement with quite a few Coursera, Netflix and other video based resources.  Once the kids are reading well idependently they also have daily reading assignments on various topics too. 

 

 

 

 

[Haiku]

Unless you are on board with unschooling, I think that school is a better option if you don't have three hours a day to devote to schooling your son. My oldest (but third child to join the family) went to school. It wasn't ideal, but it's what we had to do at the time to keep the family functioning at the time.

[SonshineLearner]

Is it short term stressful? Or is it long term stressful?

 

If it was short term... say 2 years... and you want to homeschool, I'd pull him.

 

I'd do something like...

1 page of writing

http://www.time4learning.com/ for maybe math and something like that

listen to history... (Story of the World)

Play Science...

Enjoy life.... Play, Play, Play

 

If your home is basically peaceful... I think this would be fine :)

 

[Crimson Wife]

You do the best you can for your kids given the circumstances you personally face.

 

It broke my heart to enroll my little one in a 22.5 hour/week M-F Early Intervention preschool when she was only 27 months, but we needed the services and frankly the 1:2 teacher:student ratio at the EI preschool was actually better than she'd have at home with 2 siblings. DD really made great progress at the EI preschool and has continued to do so at the school district autism special day class.

 

If we won the lottery, I would pull youngest DD out of preschool and hire a "dream team" of experienced therapists to do intensive 1-on-1 therapies (speech, ABA, music therapy, social skills training, etc.) with her 30 hours/week. But we don't have the budget for that so we've decided that the best option available to us right now is the PS.

[OneStepAtATime]

First a quick backstory! We homeschooled last year for K, and then began HSing for 1st, but I had a baby who required serious medical treatment, and now has a disability. We had to put my son in the 1st grade in order to care for my daughter and two other young sons at home. 

 

Having DS in school is not the ideal for so many reasons, but the way we had our homeschool before, with very rigorous, teacher-centered curriculum, is not be an option for several years. DH and I have talked about an online school for 2nd grade, but the websites I've looked at say that parent involvement takes 3 hours a day.

 

I don't have 3 hours a day to devote to homeschooling. If I did, we'd be homeschooling!

 

Will someone level with me about the involvement and hand-holding for an online school? 

 

Also, please don't comment with "get him out of school now.." etc. Our situation is very complex, and we're trying to do the best we can for each of the kids, keep our daughter healthy, and keep me, at a minimum, a decent mother. Our hope and desire is to return to homeschooling when/if it is feasible and the best thing for the whole family.

 

Thanks! 

Since it really seems like you are in stress and crisis management mode right now, why not just take a deep breath, plan on his doing 2nd grade this next year at the school he is already in, but don't think in your mind you are having to commit to this long-term.  Just take it year by year or even month by month.  Perhaps the situation will be different in the fall.  Perhaps not.  That's o.k.  

 

At some point in the future, the situation at home may change enough that homeschooling will become a really positive option again. After all, as your youngers get older and your youngest matures, the youngers will require less of your time and your baby may surprise you.  Perhaps her care will not be as all consuming as it is right now, even with her disability.  Just take this one step at a time.   You are trying your best to deal with a very stressful and difficult situation.  Don't feel guilty if homeschooling your eldest would add too much strain.  The family needs you in good working condition, too.  As long as he is reasonably happy, he is learning, and he isn't being bullied, then one more year (or even longer) of public school won't kill him.  

 

Another perspective that I want to add is this:  Honestly, because my kids were in a brick and mortar for several years, they actually appreciate homeschooling very much now and are highly motivated.  Not sure my 13 year old would have been that motivated (even agreeing to work through summers during high school if necessary) if she hadn't had the brick and mortar experience first.  They know now how much happier they are homeschooling.  They don't have grass is greener on the other side issues like some kids deal with in the middle school years especially.  And truly, they had some great learning experiences, met some wonderful teachers and they both made some long-term valuable friends.  Yeah, sometimes things were NOT ideal, and two teachers in particular were total nightmares, but mostly those were pretty good years.  Anyway, big hugs.

[AMDG]

Thank you all SO MUCH for all of the support and encouragement. So much of what I've read is what I've "needed" to hear. 

 

Yes, in many ways I am mourning the educational "dreams" I had for my children (at this time, anyway). 

 

Yes, trying to homeschool right now would put a huge strain on me and the rest of the family, simply because I would be spread too thin. It would be stressful, and I would be unhappy from the pressure. 

 

When we put him in school, I felt like I wasn't even living. My life was a blur of running my daughter to therapy, appointments, hospitalizations, and when home all I wanted to do was check things off the list, which as many of us can relate to, makes the kids stressed out. I thought of my two little boys and their early childhood, and how I was consumed with the baby, homeschooling and chores, with no time left just to watch them play or read them stories. My heart was broken, and I couldn't keep the pace. 

 

I appreciate the affirmation that a few years in public school won't be terrible. It has already taught valuable lessons that we couldn't teach in homeschool (some of the children live in poverty and aren't well taken care of...this has lead to great conversations and opportunity to work on character).

 

I do have faith that once my daughter is school-aged that her care will become much more manageable. We were told it would take about 4-5 years for her health to improve and stabilize, plus she'll receive much of her therapy and education through the school at that time, which will free up a tremendous amount of my time. If that is the case, I'd be able to pull the boys out at that time right when I think those more "important" grades are coming up (I really want to educated the humanities, and there is no time in public for that). 

 

Thank you all again so much 

[OneStepAtATime]

Thank you all SO MUCH for all of the support and encouragement. So much of what I've read is what I've "needed" to hear. 

 

Yes, in many ways I am mourning the educational "dreams" I had for my children (at this time, anyway). 

 

Yes, trying to homeschool right now would put a huge strain on me and the rest of the family, simply because I would be spread too thin. It would be stressful, and I would be unhappy from the pressure. 

 

When we put him in school, I felt like I wasn't even living. My life was a blur of running my daughter to therapy, appointments, hospitalizations, and when home all I wanted to do was check things off the list, which as many of us can relate to, makes the kids stressed out. I thought of my two little boys and their early childhood, and how I was consumed with the baby, homeschooling and chores, with no time left just to watch them play or read them stories. My heart was broken, and I couldn't keep the pace. 

 

I appreciate the affirmation that a few years in public school won't be terrible. It has already taught valuable lessons that we couldn't teach in homeschool (some of the children live in poverty and aren't well taken care of...this has lead to great conversations and opportunity to work on character).

 

I do have faith that once my daughter is school-aged that her care will become much more manageable. We were told it would take about 4-5 years for her health to improve and stabilize, plus she'll receive much of her therapy and education through the school at that time, which will free up a tremendous amount of my time. If that is the case, I'd be able to pull the boys out at that time right when I think those more "important" grades are coming up (I really want to educated the humanities, and there is no time in public for that). 

 

Thank you all again so much 

:grouphug:  :grouphug:  :grouphug:

[maize]

Thank you all SO MUCH for all of the support and encouragement. So much of what I've read is what I've "needed" to hear.

 

Yes, in many ways I am mourning the educational "dreams" I had for my children (at this time, anyway).

 

Yes, trying to homeschool right now would put a huge strain on me and the rest of the family, simply because I would be spread too thin. It would be stressful, and I would be unhappy from the pressure.

 

When we put him in school, I felt like I wasn't even living. My life was a blur of running my daughter to therapy, appointments, hospitalizations, and when home all I wanted to do was check things off the list, which as many of us can relate to, makes the kids stressed out. I thought of my two little boys and their early childhood, and how I was consumed with the baby, homeschooling and chores, with no time left just to watch them play or read them stories. My heart was broken, and I couldn't keep the pace.

 

I appreciate the affirmation that a few years in public school won't be terrible. It has already taught valuable lessons that we couldn't teach in homeschool (some of the children live in poverty and aren't well taken care of...this has lead to great conversations and opportunity to work on character).

 

I do have faith that once my daughter is school-aged that her care will become much more manageable. We were told it would take about 4-5 years for her health to improve and stabilize, plus she'll receive much of her therapy and education through the school at that time, which will free up a tremendous amount of my time. If that is the case, I'd be able to pull the boys out at that time right when I think those more "important" grades are coming up (I really want to educated the humanities, and there is no time in public for that).

 

Thank you all again so much

Will your dd be able to benefit from Early Intervention preschool in a year or two? That could free up some of your time to homeschool again. I agree with others that under the circumstances if your son is having a decent experience at school that may be the best option for now. Personally I am comfortable taking a very relaxed approach to second grade at home: let them play, read books, listen to audio CD's, do some relaxed math... Learning at this age does not need to be sitting at a table completing curricula. But if that informal approach does not seem best for you and your child there is certainly nothing wrong with sending him to school for another year.

 

I think one of the hardest things we face as parents is our inability to provide the perfect childhood/education/opportunities we envision for our kids. Somewhere along the way we need to let go of the ideal and accept the best we can do as good enough.

[AMDG]

Will your dd be able to benefit from Early Intervention preschool in a year or two? That could free up some of your time to homeschool again. I agree with others that under the circumstances if your son is having a decent experience at school that may be the best option for now. Personally I am comfortable taking a very relaxed approach to second grade at home: let them play, read books, listen to audio CD's, do some relaxed math... Learning at this age does not need to be sitting at a table completing curricula. But if that informal approach does not seem best for you and your child there is certainly nothing wrong with sending him to school for another year.

 

I think one of the hardest things we face as parents is our inability to provide the perfect childhood/education/opportunities we envision for our kids. Somewhere along the way we need to let go of the ideal and accept the best we can do as good enough.

Yes! I think once she is getting her therapy and preschool at the school that I'll have more time. Also, she is often very sick. I've been told that once she is school-aged that she won't get sick nearly as often. All of these things give me hope. 

 

I've thought about the more unstructured approach, and I know I *COULD* do it, that it would be an option, but I don't think it would fly for my oldest. He has always been the BUSY type, and gets himself into trouble if he is left unstructured. He'll spend 2 hours cleaning his room or working on a project, but the second he has a free moment, it disrupts the whole house. He is the type that needs constant "work," in whatever form I can give it. But, at 7, that takes more time and planning than I have to give. Someday it'll be great...

 

Thank you all again. I'm trying to be content and put my aspirations on hold for a bit longer. 

[EmilyGF]

ADMG,

 

I'm not sure what your child's disability is, but do you need the "babysitting" the school would offer in order to go to appointments, meet with specialists, deal with therapy (keep your sanity???), even just for a year? The best virtual school in the world won't watch your child for you...

 

Emily

[Arcadia]

 He is the type that needs constant "work," in whatever form I can give it. But, at 7, that takes more time and planning than I have to give. Someday it'll be great...

 

My 9 year old took 2hrs non-stop to do his work when in K12 2nd grade .  My 8 year old took the whole day with many breaks and some daydreaming.  For K12 there is still parent involvement needed and there is still planning and "admin" work. 

Keeping your son in school for another year might work out better for your sanity. :grouphug:

[homeschoolkitty]

not the option you were looking, but if money for a better private school would help, you can do k12 in the lower grades, since all kids level achievement by 3rd grade. k12 is like public school, however it counts towards the voucher programs (check your state) and then you can have your child go to a charter/private better environment school with a credit of 80 to 90 % taken care of.